Fledglings Flying Frightfully into October

[EerilyDeleted]

A huge thanks to Mogthesleepycat for steering us successfully through September

If you are struggling with C.H.A.O.S. (Can't Have Anyone Over Syndrome) and S.T.U.F.F. (Something That Undermines Family Fun) then this is the thread where we (loosely) follow the step-by-step Flylady housekeeping system (in our own, unique, relaxed style) with lots of support and chatter along the way.

The FlyLady link is here Flylady. Don't be put off by the twee language of the site – we all agree that the underlying system is very effective.

This little-and-often system is designed so that you can follow a series of steps and routines each day (which gradually become second nature) in zones of the house which are designated weekly; defining and minimising housework - which in theory should leave you with loads more time to do something more interesting instead.

At the same time it is intended to reduce that panicky "rabbit in headlights" feeling when you are overwhelmed and everything needs doing all at once. No problem if you miss a day or two; just jump right back in and it will all come around again next month.

It's up to you, but we advise not signing up to receive the Flylady e-mails as you will be swamped with marketing nonsense. All the information you need will be linked here on a daily basis.

From the first of the month, we will be following Flylady's steps and routines using a three-pronged approach (dependent on the stage everyone is at):

• start or repeat baby steps
• repeat baby steps + do 15 minutes a day decluttering in the current zone
• reinforce baby steps and do daily missions if you have finished decluttering.
• And if you are really enthusiastic and have finished decluttering - you can go on to detailed deep cleaning in each zone.

There are three key points to keep in mind throughout:

• No perfectionism allowed - this is harder than you would imagine and many of us on this thread struggle with this one.
• You are never behind - just start where you are and anything you do is progress.
• It didn't get into a mess overnight, it won't get tidy over night - accept it will take time to get on top of things and you will be happier.

If you are new; then trying to spend 15mins decluttering daily and doing the baby steps is a good way to start. Some of us (mentioning no names) can have scary looking ‘ta-da’ lists but don't let that worry you. Do what you can, anything is better than nothing, and don't judge yourself against others.

If all else fails, a brew + the power of three technique + a bit of support on here can work wonders.

Here's the launch pad for more experienced fledglings Launchpad.

Don’t let it put you off if we appear a bit cliquey, we really aren’t. Some of us have been on here for years – but all lurkers, intermittent returnees, oldies and newcomers very, very welcome.

SingToTheSky put together a glossary of the many weird and might-seem-a-bit-cliquey terms. We have been going a long time but we always love newbies - hopefully this list will help you settle in.

KCC - the Keep Calm Corner, invented by our lovely Fledgling SC back in March, where the OP posts nice diverting links, memes, questions etc to distract us from the pandemic.

Ta Da - instead of a to do list (which is of course welcome too) we often post our achievements, with accompanying jazz hands, in order to celebrate the positives, however small they seem! Sometimes if we want to share an embarrassed giggle/commiserations we also post a ta didn’t - the stuff we didn’t get done!

BRC - Bag/Box of Random Crap. These are usually formed when we are panic tidying and shove anything in “to sort later” which is also known as a stash and dash .

Power of Three or PO3 - the idea that if you’re feeling really unmotivated/overwhelmed by your to do list, you just choose three things to do, and then post when you’ve done them.

DLMS - didn’t lose my shit - in other words, somehow stayed relatively calm despite a stressful day!

SS/S&S - Swish and Swipe - this is one of the key parts of the morning routine, a quick once over of the bathroom.

Home Bleugh - Flylady's Home Blessing routine

And a few basics:
LOL - load of laundry
WM - washing machine
TD - tumble dryer
DW - dishwasher
HSL - hallway, stairs, landing

And finally "The Naughty Corner" - this is for Fledglings who perhaps didn't get done what they had planned for the day but are in need of a comfy seat, pile of cushions, tasty snacks, stiff drink and friends to chat to.

Wellies I’m sure you know from my frequent rants on here that I totally get you on the at sea feeling. Latest rant coming up. 🚨

I wonder if this month has been extra tough on families because as well as the weather/darkness (that affects my mood anyway) it’s been a shock returning to “normal”. Even though it’s all familiar, it’s an awful lot of rushing around getting people to various clubs and lessons (including online), it’s all extra thought isn’t it. Even without the worries about whether anyone will have to self isolate and such. I have to admit that a part of me was dreading the return to normal and although it’s been mostly ok that is basically just because DH is the one doing virtually all the club runs. And we’ve still messed up a few times. And no, tesco for alone time doesn’t really cut it. Because you’re still having to think about whatever everyone else needs, what food will your DD eat, what meals will fit in around everyone. Also masks, queues etc. Ugh.

I know what you mean about the lurching from one crisis to the next. It always feels like SOMETHING doesn’t it. Throw in some anxious kids and all the reassurance etc needed and it’s bloody exhausting. DD1 is driving me batshit lately due to her lack of understanding about, well, anything, which can make her act quite spoilt and she needs to somehow learn that no, life does not actually revolve around her, there are four others in the house.

On which note: our new kitchen bin lid broke yesterday and I actually could have cried. Or thrown it out of the window. It’s such a small thing in isolation, but it’s yet another Thing. It’s like my typo on the thread, last month I think - sfuff - stuff and faff!

But anyway. You have a huge amount on your plate, it’s ok not to manage it all, I saw something on FB about how it feels like you’re juggling everything but actually some juggling balls are just plastic and others are delicate and fragile, some are your own, some are family’s etc... and it’s ok to drop the less important things in order to protect the fragile ones.

Must take own advice. 🤦‍♀️

Anyway. I’ve been awake but in bed for about two hours and mostly listening to the same song on repeat so clearly it’s a self-care-needed-before-I-implode sort of day. 😬

PO3.1 (after I hit post and then listen to the song one more time, without any distractions)
1️⃣get up, weigh in, quick shower and dress
2️⃣breakfast, beta blockers and a big glass of water
3️⃣discuss plan for the day with DH and write a few tasks that I can achieve

👻👋

Mc what lovely news. I hope you have an easy labour( if there is such a thing) and look forward to your little Mac.

Sing I think you have hit the nail on the head with that piece.

Lisette oh yes, butteries and softies. Softies with crispy bacon. Buttery with jam mmmmm.

Having a very lazy morning. I just can’t be bothered.

Ta da.
Washed up glasses and mugs from last night. Boys did the dishwasher.
Made tea.
Took tea back to bed.

👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻🍒🍒👻

ta da so far
🧡shower
💛showed epic to do list to DH and decided on some things to focus on
🧡LOL (bedding)

PO3.2
1️⃣cut DS’ hair (actually finish it as I’m just pausing to write this!), get him to shower
2️⃣phone HA
3️⃣have a healthy early lunch, I’m so hungry!

Morning everyone! First proper day of half term and DD has come down with a cold. So we’ve decided stay in and have a Halloween movie day. I’ve ordered some treats for uber and we are cuddled up warm. Pic attached of the girl snuggling up with me and the dog and feeling a bit sorry for herself bless her!. I intend on doing nothing today.

It’s lovely to hear about everyone’s grandparents!

OMG mc good luck! So exciting!!

Thank you up, I’m feeling much better now. Posting here does make me feel a bit better actually, it gives me something to work at

Thank you wellies, that’s really lovely about your DH’s gran seeing your DC.

sing you’ve definitely hit the nail on the head, but it is comforting to know that others are feeling out of sorts too and it isn’t just me!

Wheels coming off the world is a good description ☹️ Both my own little world and the world at large!

I’ve got some time at home on my own now so I’m going to try watching Community since I’ve heard it’s funny, and I don’t usually get to use Prime on my own (it’s only on the PlayStation/TV).
I feel I’ve earned it:

ta da continued (I have decided to keep updating instead of a big list at the end of the day)
💛designed and wrote in weekly planner sheet (thinking of photocopying to A3 at the library in future)
🧡designed and wrote in shopping list sheet which is also going to include non-grocery stuff like if DD1 wants hair dye or we need a new kettle or whatever. At the moment we end up ignoring the essentials when something easy to buy comes along and it doesn’t seem fair.
💛emailed autism support worker as I’ve double booked with flu jabs!
🧡got DD1 to strip bedding and try on dance costumes
💛phoned housing trust who confirmed we sort the light (that’s why DH has taken the others to town, as well as getting a couple of tops for dance)

Right, off for some tv time! 👻👋

You’re more than welcome wellies! As long as you’re happy having a snotty 3 year old and a very bored 1 year old around!.

Enjoy community sing, I quite liked it when I watched it.

Homemade Fish and chips for dinner!

Pumpkin much better idea than going out if it is anything like here. It does look snuggly at your house. Grey and dreary, then lovely sunshine and after that constant rain including a very heavy shower when I went out to see to the hens. Dark early too despite the clock change.oh even mentioned on local news just now.

Wellies power of three always a winner.
Sing hope you enjoyed your free time.

Ta da
Bed made
Shower
Cleaned shower, doors.

Kitchen
Washed up
Washed glasses, lead to
Wiped shelves.

Lead to cleaning the two glass cupboards
And everything in them.
Wiped Everhot as I dripped blackcurrant juice everywhere last night including the Everhot doors x3 and the floor. Not much just dribbles.

Vacuumed kitchen floor
Removed chairs
DH offered to wash the floor🙀 faints.

Put last night left overs in oven.
Vacuumed dining room and sitting room. Could dust before as DH was in there so I stayed in kitchen and listened to afternoon play.
Logging people’s choices of windows.

Stacks snacks up for MC and cosy blankets and pillows.

My afternoon has been totally unproductive! I enjoyed a few episodes of Community (Abed is amazing 😅) and then got a sicky headache so have been fit for nothing so I ended up lying in the dark for a while. Feel a bit better again now, so:

PO3.3
1️⃣get washing in dryer
2️⃣reply to email and then cancel aqua for Friday as I had to move DS’ therapy to 12
3️⃣decide the plan for the rest of the evening re Caglets, getting ready for tomorrow etc (so glad DD1 doesn’t have to be there until the afternoon!)

ta da continued
🧡forced self to relax
💛switched dryer on because DS hadn’t put it on - glad we have spare bedding for tonight!
🧡emailed autism support worker
💛got DS to try on costume (he looks so cute in his shirt!) and put it away
🧡cancelled aqua fit for Friday
💛proper shower/hair wash/defrost
🧡bathed/hair wash for Cagletini
💛told DD1 to shower

Sorry you’re both struggling Wellies and Sing. Remember you might feel that you aren’t getting all the important things on your to do list done, but I bet they aren’t really important in the grand scheme of things. You can only do what you can do. I agree, Tesco absolutely does not count as alone time.

Ta das:
✅ beds made
✅ LOL hung up
✅ gammon in slow cooker for tea
✅ DNLMS at DD’s sudden regression to stubborn toddler on our walk this morning. Managed to get her home smiling and me only slightly traumatised and embarrassed.
✅ Halloween craft including some window decorations that I am rather proud of
✅ ironing pile almost eradicated and clean/ironed clothes away
✅ upstairs dusted (hoovering and bathroom will have to wait until later in the week, I lost all motivation)
✅ decluttered some of DD’s baby toys/books. They are just chucked in a cupboard for now in case she changes her mind, but it’s created toy box and shelf space for the impending Christmas influx.
✅ created a detailed shopping list and budget for a shopping trip later in the week. First time I’ve been to the shopping centre since last Christmas. It’s earlier than I usually do it and I’m not looking forward to it, but as we don’t know where we’ll be lockdown wise I just want to get as much Christmas stuff and some bits I need for winter sorted so I don’t need to go back.
✅ meal prep for two work days.
✅ kitchen put back together.

Very true up I think it’s easy to forget how much we do handle. When you’re in the situation all the time you don’t necessarily appreciate how much there is that you just do without thinking.

And we are probably all doing better than we think in some areas. I was saying to DH about how we don’t give the kids any fun memories (even before lockdown we were so bogged down in daily life that we never really did much). But then I remembered the Caglets saying a few times how last year Was Not Halloween because I didn’t get time to make our traditional treat, Body Bit Soup. I felt guilty at the time but actually I’m quite pleased that it sort of proved how important it is. Then the other night I heard DD1 proudly telling her friend about it on the phone! It’s something I randomly did maybe 6/7 years ago and we have done it all other years since. I guess that’s the kind of thing that does matter even when we aren’t doing the other stuff. So that made me feel a bit better.

ta da again
🧡cut DS’ hair, forgot to add that earlier! Didn’t turn out too badly in the end
💛sorted DD1’s hair
🧡antiprocrastinated by replying to some messages about meet ups etc

Sleep soon but just watching an anime with DD1

:o Wellies it’s just a thick smoothie type thing made with frozen red berries and vanilla ice cream. In a bowl topped with various sweets that look like body parts (some proper Halloween ones like eyeballs but anything will do like jelly beans for kidneys etc... not to scale :o). Last time I also reduced some of the juice for blood drips :o it looks gross but is tasty!

final ta da
💛set up app to track water intake for a bit... I am so forgetful
🧡put fresh bedding on (new to us as honorary auntie passed some on, nice to have a change!)
💛got clothes and set alarm for yoga.

Bugger just realised I haven’t booked next week’s yoga, so will have to dash down and do that on the phone app before bed.

Night all!

Body bit soup sounds great. We are planning a Halloween dinner just for us. Not decorating outside this year.

Hope MC is okay and having newborn snuggles.

I have a 30 minute induction for work tomorrow - just so I can go to a cupboard and retrieve stuff safely in this Covid age.

Just checking in re Mc

sing/wellies I totally with you.i don't get alone time and sometimes I just want the world to stop spinning so I can get off for a bit and not have to manage Everyone Else

Not felt great yesterday,ended up doing 2hoir v slow walk over nature reserve as dd2 was so strung out after first trip to adds since before lockdown as I'd heard free from stuffs been roll backed..not great for dairy free she likes by anyone gf would deffo benefit.i bought some cards and wrap paper for lil zoo birthday (thursday) frozen salmon and lamb mince,vegan squirty cream and candy floss grapes so not total loss!
Did manage watch dvd(h.potter 4) with D's)lil zoo
Ended up just do sandwich tea
DS hated grapes(not what expected)dd2 said they v sweet but nice.lil zoo inhaled them

Need pop to Morrison's today and attack laundry mountain
..

Asda not adds

Also awake Zoo.
I had a nightmare involving school.

Now I have restless leg syndrome. I want to go back to sleep.
Sorry to hear people needing alone time and not getting it. Could you tell them that you are having half an hour upstairs. Difficult with little ones but older ones should be able to do it.
DH is going to see DS3 on Thursday. I can’t go to BF as she is self isolating due to a neighbour. I need to plan something.

I'm awake too.

I'm not feeling that "stop the world I meed to get off" thing at the moment but I have at times in the past when the sheer weight of everything we have to and think about all the time plus never being alone gets too much. Or even if you are alone you are constantly thinking about what's for dinner, food shopping etc and never switching off.

I've just been downstairs to feed the cats. Put a couple of things in the DW and put it on. Made a cuppa and back to bed. Thinking about what's for dinner and work today.

Bower - sorry about nightmare. When I left my last job under difficult circumstances (very stressful but probably not as bad as yoi have gone through) there was an immediate feeling of weight off my shoulders but it took much longer to throw off some of the specific resentments. Then one day about a year later I realised that it just didn't bother me any more. Hopefully you will reach that stage in time too, we are here to listen in the meantime.

Zoo - we are divided on the Candy Floss grapes too, I'm not keen but DH and DD like them.

Sing - that's lovely about the body part soup which sounds very creative. We are very undecided what to do about Hallowe'en, we are assuming there won't be any / many trick or treaters (mine are too old) but we still want to decorate. DD plans to go to her friend's house (tier 1 so allowed) and watch creepy movies. DS wants sweets.

Adult DS has moved into his flat. He took all his tech, socks, underwear and a change of clothes. He bought new bed, bedding, towels, chest of drawers, microwave, basic kitchen stuff. Flat came with white goods. Estate agents send carpet cleaners into all their properties. Also provided masks, sanitiser. It's a lovely fresh start for him. I'm rather envious!

He's been wfh since March, and we are both glad to have our own space, and bubbles. This week is late starts, which makes it easy for me to take him a batch of newly laundered clothes each day. We 're planning to declutter by photo emails, so that everything he wants to store will either fit into the big cupboard or sit in boxes on top.

Links for Tuesday 27th

what's for dinner think about this before 6pm!

Today's Flight plan

Mission is to remove anything which does not belong in your living room.

Could I also suggest taking a browse through the Flylady website? I have found myself posting these links every day but haven't read any of the "background info" stuff for years, I am going to try and do this again, refresh myself with some of the principles and habits and try not to laugh at the twee stuff.

Aww mrstidy what a big step!

Friend can’t make yoga this morning so I am going to get a taxi as my foot is still a bit sore (no idea what I did)... although I’d probably be more likely to try walking if it wasn’t hammering with rain 🤣😳

Glad I got my clothes ready last night.

PO3.1
1️⃣weigh in, quick shower and dressed in yoga stuff (but will put jeans over the top)
2️⃣book taxi for 9.10am, find yoga mat, drink and bus pass and put by the door
3️⃣breakfast, end fast timer, beta blocker, glass of water and preferably quick chat with DH about today’s plans depending if he’s awake