Combining April showers with Fledgling powers (2016)

[SpareCrust]

Humungous thanks to Greymalkin for leading us so professionally and capably through March!

And thank you in advance to Einstein for covering the first four days of this thread (while I sidle off)!

If you are struggling with C.H.A.O.S. (Can't Have Anyone Over Syndrome) and S.T.U.F.F. (Something That Undermines Family Fun) then this is the thread where we (loosely) follow the step-by-step Flylady housekeeping system (in our own unique, relaxed style) with lots of support and chat along the way.

Flylady link here.

Don't let the somewhat sickly and barftastic language of the site put you off: the underlying system is sound!

This little-and-often system is designed so that you can follow a series of steps and routines each day (which gradually become second nature) in zones of the house which are designated weekly; defining and minimising housework; which in theory should leave you with loads more time to do something more interesting instead!

At the same time it is intended to reduce that panicky "rabbit in headlights" feeling when you are overwhelmed and everything needs doing all at once. No problem if you miss a day or two; just jump right back in and it will all come around next month again!

It's up to you, but we advise not signing up to receive the Flylady e-mails as you will be swamped with masses of bumph. All the information you need will be linked here on a daily basis.

From the first of the month, we will be following Flylady's steps and routines using a three-pronged approach (dependent on the stage everyone is at):

• start or repeat baby steps
  
• repeat baby steps + do 15 minutes a day decluttering in the current zone
  
• reinforce babysteps and do daily missions if you have finished decluttering.
  
  ** And if you are really enthusiastic and have finished decluttering - you can go on to detailed deep cleaning in each zone.
  
  There are three key points to keep in mind throughout:
  
  
• No perfectionism allowed - this is harder than you would imagine and many of us on this thread struggle with this one.
  
• You are never behind - just start where you are and anything you do is progress.
  
• It didn't get into a mess overnight - it won't get tidy over night - accept it will take time to get on top of things.
  
  If you are new; then trying to spend 15mins decluttering daily and doing the babysteps is a good way to start. Some of us (mentioning no names!) can have scary looking ‘ta-da’ lists but don't let that worry you. Do what you can, anything is better than nothing, and don't judge yourself against others.
  
  If all else fails, a brew + the power of three technique + a bit of support on here can work wonders!
  
  Here's the launch pad for more experienced fledglings
  
  Oh and don’t let it put you off if we appear a bit cliquey, we really aren’t! . Some of us have been on here for years and some of us natter rather a lot – but all lurkers, intermittent returnees, oldies and newcomers are very, very welcome!

[BlueEyeshadow]

Einstein Buttonhole stitch - make it a feature!

After posting yesterday I managed to do a reasonable house bleugh so the place was presentable this morning. Now to try and keep it this way. [hollow laugh]

Also have body clutter, and excessive sweet cravings at the moment.

[YesEinsteinsMumDid]

Oh I will be, I will be. IF i can get my hands on the jumpers. ALso the toad has grown so there isn't actually enough sleeve to add thumb holes. Not that it is going to stop ds unpicking the seams. It is a fidgeting thing too.

[SpareCrust]

Sympathies re: the body clutter Cotswold/Blue. I find the key to battling sweet cravings (which I struggle with too) is not having carbs in the morning (well it helps anyway. I certainly can't claim to be very successful or much of an expert when it comes to diets). I have acquired a rather prominent and wobbly spare tyre around my middle for the first time in my life. Last year it was a muffin top. This year it has grown to encircle the full circumference! Utterly hideous!

Einstein Good luck with the dratted darning! Dd is similarly obsessed with thumbs though cuffs but in a balletic sort of way She and her dancing friends can't get enough of them. Combined with snoods and enormous floppy roll necks and leg warmers which in reality = tedious amounts of hand washing [sigh] But my current school uniform bugbear is to do with hair not being tied back. How I wish the school would be strict about it (they only enforce it for sport and some practical science lessons). All the girls in her year have hair virtually down to their knees and it looks so messy and impractical. And yet they rigorously check on skirt lengths (not higher than 4cm above the knee). Oh well. There are worse things I suppose ... .

[SpareCrust]

Sorry, an emboldening failure there Blue

[CotswoldStrife]

Feels like I spent most of today in the kitchen, either cleaning up or preparing food for tonight's tea (which was only meatballs and pasta, not a meal with a two-page list of ingredients). I blame the breadcrumbs and the associated washing-up of the food processor.

Yeah, the body clutter, I am peri menopausal and the weight just gathers around my middle now. Amazing how your body changes. If I am sensible it will drop off.

Have stayed off the laptop today, which has probably helped with the kitchen stuff. Plan to blitz the lounge/diner tomorrow ready for the weekend - it's a bank holiday here, extra wine day - woo hoo!

[SpareCrust]

V quiet on here atm. Hope everyone ok?!

Well done re: all the kitchen choring Cotswold meatballs done properly are a bit of a faff but always popular with dd and friends!

I decided not to do my usual Thursday cook-up today to give my back a rest.

Felt a bit meh today and achieved virtually nothing save for a bit of typing for dh. Spent the day generally avoiding phone calls and people who want to be sociable. Managed a bit of desultory laundry and paper sorting.

One positive - dog walker came today because of my back ache - and furry one has made a bulldog friend

Waves to all fledglings!

[SpareCrust]

Baby-step no 29 for tomorrow, Fri 29th April is: here. It explains how it took Flylady nine months to get on top of routines and have her house running on automatic pilot and it introduces the weekly pamper mission.

We are in Zone 5 this week: The Living Room (April 24-30).

Spend 15 mins decluttering in Zone 5.

When you have finished decluttering, the detailed cleaning list (if you are at that stage) for Zone 5 is here.

Friday's mission, the last in Zone 5, can be found here. A thorough hoover of sitting room.

The daily focus for Friday is: decluttering our purses, handbags and cars.

The monthly habit for April is //www.flylady.net/d/habits-of-the-month/april/ making your bed!

For a summary of the above, see the flight plan : //www.flylady.net/c/fp.php?tzm=-120 which should update itself daily.

[BlueEyeshadow]

Lots of running around today... Had coffee with a school mum this morning, in a mostly tidy house, realised there was nothing for tea so went to the supermarket, had lunch, did some work, did mega-convoluted school run and DS2's parents evening, dropped DS2 at Beavers, sat down for a bit, picked him up again, fed the boys, went to Zumba and then finally got to flop with a bit of supermarket quiche to watch Masterchef!

[SpareCrust]

Morning! Hope eveyrone is OK? V quiet atm.

Goodness Blue that sounds exhausting! Hope your day today is less logistically demanding!

Sorry to be forever moaning but today is not a particularly good day. Back is crumped. I've let my fellow volunteerers (who this morning are 20+ years older than me) down (although will be able to make it up to them in part this Sun by taking over their roles). Cleaner has texted to say she isn't coming again. House is a pit and we are supposed to be entertaining this w/e. Dh has just sent through urgent non-Eng-mother tongue doc to edit. And, after much angst and contemplation, he is officially telling notaire this morning that Plan A renovation project as it stands is a no go. So frustrating, because finally after years of saving and putting up with far from ideal living circs, we can finally afford it. But we both agree that, owing to business structure, tax issues, extended family matters (as ever!) it would be too much of a risk in this format. And there is no Plan B as yet. Very after months and months of planning and anticipation and meetings and stress etc. Bum and double bum.

Apart from that, everything fine !! Minimal Flying will be happening today.

Oh and - so far - upshot of week's home office clearance = 10 bags of papers.

[SpareCrust]

PS Thread business

The end of the month is fast approaching. I am OK to continue thread leading during May at a punch (although am away for odd bits of it) but also good if anyone else wants to volunteer.

And shall we say that July and Aug will be leader-free months like last year? Is everyone ok with that?

Can't believe how fast the year is going

[SpareCrust]

Sorry

That really was meant to be "a pinch" not "a punch" !

Just a typo and not a passive agressive Freudian slip, honest

[CotswoldStrife]

I can do May if you like ducks and weaves to dodge punches

Sorry to hear about the demise of Plan A. Must be so frustrating for you all. Is it something you are legally committed to doing (the renovation) or is it OK to do it at your own pace rather than a predetermined schedule?

Couple of loads of laundry done today, need to crack on with the tidying though. Back later - have a good morning everyone!

[knittingwithnettles]

Last night I had Book Club dinner here. Always stressful, although surprisingly the cobwebs seem less noticeable by candlelight What was worse, was that my clever clever prepare brown rice in advice method resulted in what I can only describe as chewy hard rice. Or was it? I just find myself worrying so much all the time about these little things..however much I simplify the menu or the arrangements.

Nice to see everyone though, I just wish I could see them for coffee not dinner. I was discussing this with dh, and I came to conclusion that I just cannot cope with being a hostess - I cannot relax, I feel on edge, the food seems tasteless, I am alert all the time for the next thing I need to do (ie: serve next course, put out coffee, pass crisps) I can see this has happened already to my mother who is barely able to sit down before she starts clearing away the plates and fussing, how do I prevent this happening to me too I need to go to some sort of pyschotherapy and rediscover my inner "welcoming" self. I suspect the CHAOS (can't have anyone over due to Stuff) has more to it than just the stuff. Maybe I don't want to have anyone over in the first place and the stuff is my defence

SC anyway you are much better at this than me. I know once your guests come round you are very good at just enjoying them.

I think all these big discussions can seem time wasted, but in the end, one ramps up to the next stage better prepared and with more insight. So when you get to Plan B it will better thought out.

We were talking about backs last night. There is something called the Bowen method which had changed someone's life. We also discussed the fact that wrongly positioned knapsacks can be very damaging, as can unhealed minor stress fractures (from for example somersaults wrongly executed) Cotswold is meant to be very good at checking position of a knapsack in relation to your hips, length of back, spine. For example if you have a long back, but are short, you need a long knapsack, however slight you are.

ds2 has gone to football. Dh has gone off into town. He [dh] is being v annoying this morning re: Panini stickers Gosh our lives have shrunk

sympathy over volunteering, but just keep remembering YOU ARE A VOLUNTEER. and if you were being paid, you could take sick leave.

[knittingwithnettles]

talking about Freudian typos, I typed "knapsnack" instead of knapsack

[SpareCrust]

Arf at "knapsnack"

Just finished editing work thank heavens on the not so scintillating subject of transfer price adjustments .

Cotswold that is so kind of you to offer to run the thread in May! Thank you so much I will try and do June if no-one else is bursting to do it!

Thanks for kind words! We can do "the project" in our own time but the house is falling down at an alarming rate and certain things need immediate attention. Problem is, because of the nature of it, we were hoping to do it all in one fell swoop. Plus we have waited long enough. DD needs a place where she feels comfortable entertaining friends etc and life here is unnecessarily stressful as we are in effect "camping" atm. Hwr, we have obligations to extended family that we cannot ignore either. And tax issues are complex.

You are right Knitting that all these preparatory activities are not wasted, despite it feeling like it, and despite this being our third thwarted attempt. And , there is a certain relief in knowing that Plan A is definitely no longer an option and we have to start again but in a different direction. Uncertainty is the worst thing.

Well done re: book club hosting! V. kind of you to say that I am better at it but I'm really not. I find I am increasingly stressed by hosting nowadays too (except with v close friends). I faff dreadfully. It's a double whammy because once I am aware that I am faffing, I am conscious that guests will find this terribly unsettling, and that makes me faff even more . It is dh who is the relaxed one!

Will look up the Bowen method - thank you for the tip! There is not much hope for my posture now but need to start a campaign here to encourage the building and use of school lockers to encourage good posture in the young. The weight that the dc carry on their backs on a daily basis is appalling. DD's bag is often 7 or 8 kg in weight. She is getting rounded shoulders despite all the ballet classes. Ipod and laptop use not helpful when it comes to slouching either.

Arf at rediscovering your welcoming inner self I think there is definitely something in S.T.U.F.F. acting as a barrier to the outside world. I'm no expert but when you watch those hoarding progs on the telly - in certain cases - the person concerned has actually built walls around themselves albeit of magazines, toys, or pots and pans. There must be a message in that!

[Rushes to grab back 10 recycling bags of papers recently decluttered from office]

[Cagliostro]

Ooh, knapsnacks. That sounds like it has two of my favourite things... sleep and food

I'm back after a couple of days WITHOUT THE INTERNET. [hyperventilates]

Somehow I survived! :o

Will catch up properly later. DD's off to Brownie camp this afternoon! She's so excited. Nervous too (she always is before going anywhere out of the ordinary) but it's a sign of how much she's grown in confidence, as she is quite matter of fact about it - "I'm nervous about getting on the coach, but I'm still going no matter what because it was so much fun last time!" :) So, I need to get my butt in gear and make sure everything's ready. She packed most of her stuff herself but I need to check through it all and hurriedly write her name on everything with a Sharpie . Got a load of laundry going on too, and the DCs have had a bath, and did some learning stuff this morning.

She's not mentioned her friend again - she's had a fabulous rest-of-the-week and hasn't had the opportunity to play out anyway. And she's in a room with some of her best friends at camp too (neither of whom she knew from school). I'll just need to make sure that when she does play out, I'm prepared for any issues. Thank you all so much for your kind words - it's been quite a new thing, she's never had this sort of issue with anyone before (she was bullied at school, but it was outright bullying and not a frenemy thing, and the friends she's had at school have always been good friends IYSWIM).

Back later to catch up! Really need to get everything ready now.

[YesEinsteinsMumDid]

The amount of fuss ds making about getting ready to go out you would think he doesn't want to go! would someone have hot water bottles and blankies ready for me for about 9pm when I get back pretty please?

I can't volunteer to help out with thread leading for a bit. Going to be a bit insane around here for at least a month so no idea how much I will be able to post.

Wishing you all good weekends.

[SpareCrust]

You've more than done your bit with thread-leading Einstein. Safe driving, and hope snow has disappeared! [Notes requirements for return! ]

Welcome back to virtual-ality Cag! That's great news about your dd and friend! Hope she has a great time at camp!

Dh, despite having a pig of a day, is v kindly doing ballet run tonight while I pack up more (bought) cakes for school open day fair tonight. Am meeting them there and then we are going out to eat afterwards so posting links for tomorrow now! Last of the month - it certainly went quickly didn't it?

Have a great weekend fledglings!!

[SpareCrust]

Well done fledglings - you have completed another full month of Flying - hands around celebratory !

**

The last baby-step of the month, no 30, for tomorrow Sat 30th April is: here. Check the calendar for the month ahead and look out and plan for important dates.

Tomorrow will be our last day in Zone 5 : The Living Room (April 24-30).

Spend 15 mins decluttering in Zone 5 (if you do zone work at weekends that is).

When you have finished decluttering, the detailed cleaning list (if you are at that stage) for Zone 5 is here.

No mission because it is the weekend.

The daily focus for Saturday is: family fun.

The monthly habit for April is //www.flylady.net/d/habits-of-the-month/april/ making your bed!

For a summary of the above, see the flight plan : //www.flylady.net/c/fp.php?tzm=-120 which should update itself daily.

[SpareCrust]

[Lays out hip flask, comfy blankies, squishy quilts, fluffy pillows, flask of hot toddy, and hot water bottle in not-naughty corner for Einstein's return]

[midlifehope]

I have a confession to make! Today I had a company over to clean my house, oven, carpets etc. It was more money than I can afford. But I felt terribly overwhelmed with having very young kids. They've broken the back of it, so now I can start all the decluttering and detail cleaning Flylady talks about...... is this allowed, do you think?

[knittingwithnettles]

definitely midlife sometimes it is just feeling so defeated by the enormity of the task that puts one off any decluttering, you feel there are all the basics to be done before you can attempt any of the life laundry stuff. I know it is not a very flylady way round, but just feeling that you are in a tidyish house can cheer you up enough to start making small inroads. - I have a cleaning lady. It actually makes me feel worse most of the time as it frustrates me that I never move forward, but at least once a week the kitchen looks beautiful.. I can see what the house SHOULD look like. The City of Gold-

[knittingwithnettles]

And quite frankly -sips from hip flask-- anything's allowed on this thread.

[Honu]

Midlife of course it's allowed! Very sensible idea - and I hope it helps. Am rather .

[YesEinsteinsMumDid]

Snow gone SC? ha ha ha ha. We have road closures due to snow, ice and flooding. Apparently down to -2C overnight tonight. Tbh I can believe it as it wasn't much warmer last night.