Flylady's fledglings spring clean your nests! March '16

[Greymalkin]

First of all, a big thank you to Fuzzpig for leading us through the February thread, (you can hung up your duster for a bit now!)

If you are struggling with C.H.A.O.S. (Can't Have Anyone Over Syndrome) and S.T.U.F.F. (Something That Undermines Family Fun) then this is the thread where we (loosely) follow the step-by-step Flylady housekeeping system (in our own unique, relaxed style) with lots of support and chat along the way.

The FlyLady link is here Don't be put off by the twee language of the site – we all agree that the underlying system is very effective.

This little-and-often system is designed so that you can follow a series of steps and routines each day (which gradually become second nature) in zones of the house which are designated weekly; defining and minimising housework - which in theory should leave you with loads more time to do something more interesting instead.

At the same time it is intended to reduce that panicky "rabbit in headlights" feeling when you are overwhelmed and everything needs doing all at once. No problem if you miss a day or two; just jump right back in and it will all come around next month again!

It's up to you, but we advise not signing up to receive the Flylady e-mails as you will be swamped with her marketing and testimonial nonsense. All the information you need will be linked here on a daily basis.

From the first of the month, we will be following Flylady's steps and routines using a three-pronged approach (dependent on the stage everyone is at):

• start or repeat baby steps
• repeat baby steps + do 15 minutes a day decluttering in the current zone
• reinforce babysteps and do daily missions if you have finished decluttering.
• And if you are really enthusiastic and have finished decluttering - you can go on to detailed deep cleaning in each zone.

There are three key points to keep in mind throughout:

• No perfectionism allowed - this is harder than you would imagine and many of us on this thread struggle with this one.
• You are never behind - just start where you are and anything you do is progress.
• It didn't get into a mess overnight, it won't get tidy over night - accept it will take time to get on top of things.

If you are new; then trying to spend 15mins decluttering daily and doing the babysteps is a good way to start. Some of us (mentioning no names!) can have scary looking ‘ta-da’ lists but don't let that worry you. Do what you can, anything is better than nothing, and don't judge yourself against others.

If all else fails, a + the power of three technique + a bit of support on here can work wonders.

Here's the launch pad for more experienced fledglings.

Don’t let it put you off if we appear a bit cliquey, we really aren’t. Some of us have been on here for years – but all lurkers, intermittent returnees, oldies and newcomers very, very welcome.

ta da
be told by ds to sort my act out and get a grip
empty the study for an air bed
sort out bedding
throw tea together in a yummy kinda way
swap food treats for babysitting and listening skills thanks sis
take a drive in the hills just because
have a good rant or six
put the world to rights
several texts and phone calls sorting stuff
a quick trip to shop
eat junk food
clear through backlog of podcast watching
crafting just a little

hopes sc does not look too closely at the list

I realised I forgot to explain what a BRC is. I'd put it on another thread not this one. It stands for Bag (or Box) of Random Crap. One of those containers that has all manner of random shit swept into it during a panic tidy. We have a lot of these. Gradually reducing them though!

Haven't managed to get out of bed yet. Resting as much as possible this morning in the hope of actually coping with the event tonight. Eek. Painkillers a-go-go.

Not attempting any flying today obviously but I will put a couple of bits away that I meant to do last night but I gave up and I must move the laundry on a bit.

I'm bored so here's a picture of a Claymore attacking clutter.

Haven't managed to get out of bed yet. Resting as much as possible this morning yep same here. ds is off school sick, again.

Afternoon all!

Thanks Grey and Needastrongone (and fab going re: both of your ta da lists yesterday ) and waves to everyone else.

Like the sound of your posh spag bol Grey!

Yes, you have hit the nail on the head Needastrongone it was indeed a very surreal day yesterday. Spent most of it replying to concerned messages. We learnt in the afternoon that dd's godfather to whom we are very close, departed from the airport 15 mins before the bomb went off. And a close friend of ours (moved back to home country last year) was actually at the air port when the bomb went off but was unharmed thankfully.

Just feel so wretched for those poor families whose members weren't so luck

And nearly lost my breakfast this morning watching Susanna Reid and Kate Burley with their hard faux-sad faces milking the tragedy and raking over the same coals endlessly. (I remember now why I never normally watch tv before the 6pm news!]

Fair enough if they are reporting new information (such as capturing the third terrorist) but was it really necessary to show the footage (with the screaming) of Maalbeek tube station over and over and over again? [And they hadn't even bothered to learn how to pronounce Maalbeek properly [anger].]

Yes, there is a bit of transport disruption today, yes it is much quieter than normal, yes the airport is shut and yes we had a minute's silence at 12.00 noon, but other than that everything is normal, schools are open, people are going to work etc. There is no hysteria (Belgians are generally very calm, stalwart and pragmatic people!) and there is absolutely no need to stand in the middle of the Bourse and ask people how they are feeling over and over? How do you bloody well think they are feeling? Sorry but it is just more upsetting than usual I suppose when it concerns your local patch!

And as for the reporting on Belgium itself, I feel frankly. Yes, it obviously has issues with terrorism (frankly if I were a terrorist I would probably choose a small country in the middle of a transport hub, which is 2 hrs from Cologne, 2 hrs from Calais etc ) and no-one seems to acknowledge that it is a tiny country fhs, with a population of only 11 million (as compared with 66 million of France and 64 of UK) with attendant small police service and resources. Bloody hell, London only has 2 million people more than the entire country here! And yet France and the UK don't hesitate to pile in with all the blame. I'm not saying improvements can't be made but they are trying their best in v difficult circumstances with very stretched resources.

And don't get me started on the politicians Nigel Farage Michael Howard who have harnessed (rather sickenly imho) these awful deaths to further their Brexit arguments. Keep saying it until I am blue in the face but the movement of migrants across Europe falls under the competence of national govs not the EU. Isis will still exist whether we leave the EU or not. Similarly the war in Syria will carry on. And the Jungle wouldn't exist in Calais if migrants could just go anywhere they liked at any time as some are inferring. Arrrggghhhh.

Sorry -- everyone is entitled to their own views on Brexit and I don't meant to preach. I just hate it when people state incorrect facts and no one challenges them on it.

I have now just de-railed what is supposed to be a Flying thread all by myself but just needed to get all of that off my chest! Apologies!

As for Flying: yesterday was a write-off but managed to declutter one pile of papers, walk the dog, do one load of washing and keep the kitchen clean and answer about three million texts, e-mails and phone calls from concerned family and friends.

Oh yes, and rather embarrassingly, I realised this morning why volunteering was closed yesterday . It was because I volunteer on a Wed not a Tues [duh] The door being locked was absolutely nothing to do with terrorism! I am evidently losing my marbles. Oh well, I least I was there on the right day this morning!

New volunteering centre (education centre for migrants) is indeed closed today though, because some of the roads in the area in which it is located are cordoned off, which I'm ashamed to say I am a little bit relieved about because I won't have to juggle that and ballet runs etc this afternoon.

No real Flying to report today. Tidied up kitchen. Did school runs + dog walking + quick supermarket dive.

This afternoon = ballet run + dog walk , pet shop, tidying up of kitchen and cooking. And quick run to post office if I can make it. [Yawn]

Hope everyone is ok and will be back to catch up with thread properly this evening/tomorrow!

In the meantime: just wanted to say to Midlife you are not alone! I have huge problems prioritising everything and getting a good balance between activities - and I can really identify with that "feeling overwhelmed" state of affairs - so shouldn't really be offering advice about this.

However, all I would say is that my dh has mastered this (he has a mahoosively stressful job, travels a lot, is under lots of time pressure but still manages to make time for lots of little family things and is overall hugely productive) and I would say that his mantra is to do little short focused bursts of activity - even if just 30 mins - but doing them consistently and every day. His weekends are spent doing 20 mins gardening here, 1 hour of dog-walking there, 40 mins of work, 30 mins of cooking, 1 hr of watching rugby. But he keeps it up consistently, all the time(probably to the detriment of his health it has to be said). And he is ruthlessly focused (and not distracted like me) when he is doing something! Oh and doesn't necessarily clear up after himself.

And basically Flylady has the same philosophy: short burst of focused activity that come around month by month so you cover a good spread of areas in your home. No need to panic if you miss it one month, because it will be coming around the next. I know it is hard to incorporate other stuff such as gardening and cooking. I just think you have to acknowledge that at certain times of your life (esp when you have very small dc) that the garden, for example, will be neglected. And when you have more time you can prioritise it again.

One thing that has really helped me is (when I get the new school timetable every year) to sit down and draw myself out an old-fashioned weekly timetable filling in every hour from the minute I get up to the minute I go to sleep. I blank out the "dead" time when I can't do anything else ie school runs/meal times etc and fixed weekly appts ie volunteering and then fill in the rest with half hourly and hourly slots of activity. That way one definitely gets the most out of the week! I incorporate the main Flying routines in to it. (And it is important, if at all poss, to block out some relaxation time - an hour or two - for yourself too on a weekly basis too!)

Think Grey's advice is good though about dividing garden in to zones though. And sometimes multi-tasking can work ie clean bathroom while bathing dc etc.

But honestly Midlife - having said all of the above - looking after a baby is a full-time job in itself - try not to be too hard on yourself. They grow up so fast. Enjoy it! The gardening can wait ... .

Caglio arf at BRC

and s to those of you who are feeling under par today

Toffee hope pain is diminishing today and that you are still taking it steady

SC i have to admit that I refuse to watch the news simply for the reason you state. I am pissed off with the repeating of the same footage, the misrepresentation to suit political agendas, the don't give a shit as long as I get paid robots, the fucking politicians. So I stopped watching the news. I am sooo much happier as a result. I only watch the news when I want to and tend to watch russia today rather than bbc or sky. RT still manages to make me want to throw things at the tv but less so

and and for you

Seriously think I will follow suit Einstein and thanks for the goodies!

Sending [tea] and and in return!

er, that should have been obviously!

Cag Toffee and Einstein hope you are all feeling better and rested

SC Its a sad state of affairs when something as terrible as terrorism feels normal :( Although on the other hand, life carrying on as much as possible shows a refusal to be dominated by these awful people. I remember being in London very soon after the 7/7 bombings and the feeling of the city was unreal.

Another productive day here!
Ta Da
Fed cats and DS
Took DS to nursery
An hour of book keeping/accounting stuff
Made beds x2
Emptied, washed and refilled cat litter trays
Washed towels
In boudoir:

• Climbed up step ladder to wipe inch-thick dust off the top of the wardrobe
• Pulled out corner chair, dusted and hoovered it, hoovered carpet underneath
• Pulled out big antique chest of drawers, hoovered back of it and grot from the floor under it
• Decluttered random crap from the floor around the room Took sack of old clothes to charity shop Put away online shop delivery Washed out empty wine bottles Bottled the tea and raisen wine that I made months ago (bloody hell it is strong!!!) Picked up DS

Not planning on doing too much more, had a busy few days!

Home ed meetup today after Dh's broken foot incident.
.
Did lots of food shopping spurred on by the fact that Dh seems to have a hairline fracture on his foot, causing by rushing to open the door to me and skidding on the stairs, because I couldn't be bother to get my key out Ds2 opened the door in fact but dh for some reason thought he had to rush downstairs. All a mixup.

Poor Toffee I told your story to DH today, he is in despair about his foot as this time last year he was in hospital with a thrombosis, so refuses to go to A & E ever ever again (there 10 hours last year on two successive days) and is saying why do these things always happen to me; I said they don't - they happen to lots of people.

So grocery shopping
exercise
picked up car
made ds2 do a bit of typing, but that wasn't a great success
also saw lady from new school ; an interesting meeting - I shall draw a veil. She was v helpful though I hasten to add.. Curiouser and curiouser is all I can say. He may go back to school in May, or there again he may not...

SC I really do not feel like going to the airport on Friday but as with all travel it seems impossible to avoid living daily life. Anxiety building up anyway at the thought of travel (really pre travel prep that affects me usually) at best of times so all in all next day is a write off.

SC Do you have my husband there? Have you borrowed him? He sounds uncannily like mine, in work, 'busyness' and untidyness. He NEVER tidies up round himself . Glad to hear you guys are ok over there. I only listen to the news these days, even that is on a loop.

Grey, another busy day, no wonder you don't feel like doing so much more!

ta da
Sweep floor and vacuum downstairs.
Tidy whole house.
Clear out my underwear/sock drawer in the bedroom.
Another charity bag filled.
Emptied all the bins in the house.
Pony.
Dogs x 2.
Chickens.
Pop to M&S for flowers for DM.
Take DM out to lunch for her birthday.
Collect DS from school.
Cooked tea, used a jar to be fair.
Cleared up.
Checked DD sorted as she's going skiing tomorrow.
Some work emails.

Flightplan for Thursday 24th March

We are continuing in Zone 4: The Boudoir

The next mission in the bedroom is to declutter and dust your dresser / chest of drawers

Our next baby step is to is to learn about Swish and Swipe More info here

Habit of the month is getting dressed to your shoes. A tad controversial on here, some do, some don’t… (I certainly don't)

Thursday focus is errand day Any task to be done outside of the home: grocery shopping, tip runs, dry cleaning, doctor appointments, that sort of thing.

Flying quite well this am. BUT have found a mouse has made its way into my blinking bedroom and pooped over a load of clothes! Can't believe it. Tomorrow I will be blitzing the room with hot soapy water and mop. We've had pest control out so hopefully it will be sorted soon. Do you think it's because I live in the country? Would hate to think its crumbs / lack of cleanliness!

SC, I was thinking of you yesterday morning. The Police force(s) did come in for a bit of criticism, not sure how valid it was.

Toffee take it easy after the fall. I knew someone years ago who fell down a flight of stairs and I thought she'd been in a car accident or similar. The damage was tremendous.

I had a late potty trainer. I can't give much advice as I may have tried to blank the whole experience from my mind. I spent years saying 'do you need the toilet' and can still tell from her posture when she needs to go. She still leaves it to the last minute.

No progress on the furniture construction . We haven't opened all the boxes yet but there are already a few damaged pieces. Also, there appears to have been some error on the measuring side (completely our fault) but instead of admitting it straightaway DH tends towards the bodge-it option so has to be carefully managed. I have also noticed another problem with his initial layout, so I can see some rejigging happening. He was very late home from work tonight which didn't help. I can see a few heated debates may happen over the weekend and if I lose my rag not a court in the land would convict me

Evening all. I am cream-crackered but can't sleep.

Congrats on all the completed ta da lists and all the decluttering going on!

Reading back, I apologise for dominating the thread so much earlier. Didn't realise I'd typed so much - must be a delayed reaction - or the effects of too much caffeine or some'at!

Only 12 children out of 23 returned to school this morning and ballet class was cancelled just an hour or so before start time owing to a combination of traffic disruption and too many pupils cancelling. Spent my freed-up time helping dh collate papers for sending out. All went well until dd and I had to bundle them up and get them ready for the last post. How is it possible to have four staplers in the house and not one of them function properly?

Midlife Oh very bad luck about the mouse! It's so horrible when they get in among textiles. We get them here on the ground floor and in the basement from time to time and I find scorching hot water and lashings of strong-smelling Dettol does the trick! (Plus controlling them at source of course as you are doing.) I suspect it will be your rural location that is the cause as I find it is either food or extreme cold that tempts them in (but mostly food). We did once inadvertently bring home a field mouse in a rucksack though (after a walking holiday). Would that be a possibility?

Grey agree about your normality point. It's like Needastrongone said it is surreal and utterly normal all at the same time. DD changed in to running shoes and track suit bottoms this afternoon and said it was her "escape outfit" Apparently they had had a talk about "jihadists" at school, they'd joined in the minute's silence and were allowed to write messages of solidarity/condolence etc in coloured chalk on the play ground surface during break time. But I obviously need to have a long talk with her this weekend about it being possible but not probable that it will happen again. Trouble is, they said on the news tonight that they are expecting further attacks. Need to calm and reassure her though!

So agree Knitting I think Easter travel will be very stressful. I can totally understand your concern. We are not flying anywhere this time but travelling by car to another European capital after the immediate holiday. Like you, I am v worried at the prospect!

And oh no about your dh and his foot! It sounds v painful and I certainly hope he didn't have to wait 10 hrs in A&E this time (if you were able to persuade him to go that is).

Needastrongone I don't know whether to congratulate you or commiserate with you on having a dh similar to mine! A belated happy birthday to your dm and hope your dd has a splendid ski trip!

Grey I'm happy you were still able to post the links after the tea and raisin wine ! You have reminded me that I need to clamber on to a ladder and dust dh's wardrobe too. Not looking forward to chest of drawer clearance

Caglio hope you felt fit enough to attend event tonight

Einstein yes, I'm afraid I have finally read your list properly! What the jeepers is wrong with it? It looks like a perfectly splendid list to me (especially the rant bit)!!

Ta da:
Didn't get as much done as hoped as ever but did a lot of office paperwork. Bundled it up for posting. Also packed up two parcels for post office plus a letter and a card. Responded to lots more concerned messages/texts/phone calls. A wee bit of ironing. And I cooked a wicked chicken tray bake thing with rice for supper (even if I do say it myself) which only took 20 mins to prep! Yay! Need to develop more recipes like this!

Big waves to everyone I've inevitably missed!

G'night all!

[Oh lawd, and I've gone and written an essay again ]

I managed alright today at the event thank you. It was amazing. They were really accommodating too, gave me a folding seat to take round in case I got dizzy etc. Had a fab time but very tired! :)

I did manage to load and switch on the dryer when we got home. Can't sleep now despite having my tablets on the way home! Going to doze downstairs instead. Really hoping to get some more done tomorrow. Trying to figure out what to attempt :)

x post Fiz I am certain that some of the criticism is valid. The language divide causes undobuted difficulties too. I just think some bigger nations are a bit too willing to play the blame game.

How frustrating about the furniture. Nothing is ever easy is it? Wishing you fortitude for the weekend ahead

Agree Toffee hope you are taking it easy.

Yay Caglio!

What was wrong with the list? well you asked for flying. I am pretty sure that the fat fairy would question my definition of flying

Sorry you are struggling to sleep SC Not surprising that the bigger nations are pointing fingers they got an absolutely hammering in a report into the causes of instability in Libya recently. It was a very interesting listening especially as it was focused on the western nations obsession with control those in power vs the resultant powerhouse opportunities for radicalism to take route.

Glad you managed to get to the event Cagliostro

fizrim not a court in the land.

Midlife we have had mice in due to being in the country, but they mostly come into the house in the autumn. Afraid we approach the issue with a snap trap as the sneaky buggers out fox the humane traps, I don't agree with the glue option as it is cruel and the poison route requires you to find the bodies before you end up playing hunt the smell. That said we always try the humane trap first in case of stupid mice Never had mice this time of the year though. Had a baby rat but it had been disturbed by building activity near by and was in and out and the house bleached to within and inch of its life in a very short space of time 15mins . Good luck with getting it sorted. But you are right there can be many reasons for mice. and at least it was not a rat or squirrels which are incredibly destructive and proper pita to get rid of

Flying I put a load of washing on. and have forgotten it in the machine

Thanks for all the concern. I went back to work yesterday and had lots of sympathy (and teasing) from colleagues, which was lovely. The bruising is still spectacular (fiz - your poor friend ) and is now showing straight lines - like rail tracks - where I must have hit the rim of the steps as I fell . However, the swelling is down and I'm much more mobile, if still rather tentative when I sit down.

SC - please don't apologise for writing lots. I love reading everything you write and am very relieved that you and your family are ok. Scary to hear about near misses, though.

knitting - sorry you're feeling anxious about Easter travel. I must say I feel a bit concerned about my mum travelling via Gatwick this weekend, but am reminding myself (as should you) that security will be extra high.

Got to get ready for work now. Am so looking forward to having a few days off and hoping to tackle the house, which looks unbelievably untidy.

Salut!/Dag!

Glad you are feeling a bit better Toffee [hands over cushion with extra thick wadding]

Einstein oh yes I did ask for Flying didn't I? Gosh, well, evidently shock does terrible things to a person

Was reading v interesting article about origins of radicalisation on similar lines yesterday btw.

And agree about those cruel glue traps.

Bit crumped this morning. Done nothing but school run on foot and a quick visit to a cash point so far. Sounds rather insensitive to say it in circs but furry one is ecstatic that we are back to walking to school (metro is shut, some main thoroughfares too, so traffic blocked). Loads of soldiers on the street and a tank just 200m from the entrance of dd's school gate.

To do:
tidy up kitchen
dw on
wm on
dining room table hotspots
finish yet more Easter choc treat bags (for dc of colleagues and local godchildren)
send second part of letter which got left out of previous one yesterday
make soup out of root veg
bit more ironing
make an attempt an decluttering one bag of papers!
start sorting rooms for visitors and making up beds
re-do calendar and check all the school dates again and work out why we are not finding out about things

DD was very grumpy going to school today. I think I mentioned it before that her maths teacher gave the whole class 33 geometry definitions (each a couple of sentences long) to write out 3 times when they failed a test about them. (It comes to about 1.75 pages of lined A4.) I did try and point out to dd at the time that writing them out beautifully wasn't the object of the exercise and the teacher obviously wanted them to actually learn the definitions as well. Well that advice obviously fell on deaf ears and, predictably, she and some others failed the next test and the offenders had to write out the 33 definitions five times. And guess what happened last week? Yes, she failed the following test and had to write them out eight times. I'm afraid the same thing happened at the beginning of this week (their maths teacher is nothing but determined!) and dd failed the test by 0.5 of a mark. So they had to write them out 10 times. The following day it happened again (except she failed by 0.75 of a mark that time!) so they wrote them out a dozen times. Finally, today, she has to join four remaining offenders and write out the definitions 15 times but this time during the lunch hour. Oh dear.

DD's parting shot this morning was "but don't worry, after that I am giving a talk in Flemish on carbon monoyxide poisoning" Poor her if that is the highlight of the day!

Right, have rattled on enough. Had better get on with the tedium chores.

Have a good errand day everyone!

Yes, don't worry about writing lots, SC! Glad you're all OK.

Glad you're recovering, Toffee.

I am stressed out about lots of minor things today, and hiding on MN when I should be doing stuff.

Spent most of yesterday ferrying boys to various medical appointments, and today DS1 has an infected finger so I'm wondering if I should try and get him in to see the nurse...

Flying isn't happening and the place is a tip with Easter weekend away coming up and then my parents visiting as soon as we get back. Need to focus and do 15-min bursts, but CBA. Oh dear.