Flying into September - a new term for the Fledglings

[WhoKnowsWhereTheTimeGoes]

Welcome to the September Fledgling Flylady Thread.

This thread is for people with CHAOS (can't have anyone over syndrome). We follow Flylady, the website with a mission!

All are welcome on this thread, experienced flyers and newcomers alike.

We try to follow the commandments of Flylady as we run our homes, loosely anyway. In between there's lots of chat and support as we go through our daily lives. We have coffee, cake, and a naughty corner for those who want to chat but CBA with their house some days. However you follow it, this thread is designed to make your life a little easier and more fun.

For those who are new to the system (and those needing a refresher), there are several aspects to the system:

1. Babysteps. These build a routine. Some are really useful, some are downright odd and some are, quite frankly, there to be ignored. They build a good foundation though.

1. Decluttering. Flylade is evangelical about clutter. In order to feel good about our homes we need to ditch the clutter. Flylady divides the home into zones, week by week and repeating monthly. As well as babysteps, we have to declutter in the relevant zone. Once that is achieved we move on to...

1. Missions. Also in the current zone, these are targetted tasks to tackle one particular aspect. One a day, they vary month to month.

1. Deep Cleaning. Once we have completely decluttered (some of us seem to be stuck permanently on that stage) there are deep cleaning lists for each zone. Achieve that and your house will be spotless!

One last thing - the Flylady website encourages us to subscribe to her emails - one word - DON"T! You will be overwhelmed by them. Instead come to this thread every morning and the relevant links for the day will be there waiting for you except when the thread leader has been on the

A big thank you to Bitchy for last month, and also for doing this Sunday's links as I am off camping.

Evening all. Struggling a little with this whole work/school/fly malarkey and desperately trying to get myself back into routines. DH has decided he is ill and I can't work out whether he needs sympathy or a kick up the arse.

Am trying, really I am.

That's always a tricky one, ellie. I would go with sympathy initially (and let off steam here ).

Good advice toffee. I have packed him off to bed with a sympathetic smile (not a kiss/hug because if he is genuinely ill I don't want it).

toffee told me to let off steam so here goes..... Why is it when men are feeling a bit crappy it turns into life threatening illness which require taking to bed for several days (3 so far) and an inability to do anything apart from make a mess. Yet when I am ill, I go to work and still manage to do the day to day shit. Grrrrrrr. Maybe he is ill, maybe just tired from too many late mights. Double grrrrrrr.

Rant over.

Hmm, I don't know the answer to that one, ellie. I would have to be really, really ill to spend three days in bed (maybe your DH is, but I hope not). A close friend of mine came round to see me for the first time since term started last week. I was really worried about her because she was wheezing and looked really rough. Turns out she had felt more and more ill as the summer wore on, but she is a single mother of twin boys (one with autism and very challenging) and has no family support, so she just had to keep going. Once the boys went back to their respective schools she found the time to go to the GP; she has a lung infection, which, if I'm not mistaken, is pneumonia. Poor love.

But I'm not helping you here am I?

I think the answer is as simple as woman are brought believing they have to do everything and it is a huge thing if they say actually not well need to rest as it is deemed somehow socially unacceptable. It is not the same for men who are brought up often looked after far longer then their mums with less of an expectation of being able to do so. Eg with cooking etc. I have found this was part of burning myself out so badly over the last years. I felt I had to be someone who actually I wasn't able to be cos I was ill and because I was pushing it was getting sicker and sicker trying to live up to this unrealistic expectation. These days I would be more inclined to do as your dh and just say fuck the washing up, do literally only what is essential with ds and rest alot. Generally i find I am now ill a lot less and for shorter peroids then before because I have allowed myself to be ill and recover, instead of adding spending energy to function normall which was actually needed to just be alive. It is a hard mindset, it is against the social norm, and can be incredibly frustrating.

That said i am currently working hard to achieve burn out. And i know i will regret this but I have planned for this and have a rest schedule in place for the rest of the week, which will allow me to get the very essential stuff done.

I think the answer is as simple as woman are brought believing they have to do everything and it is a huge thing if they say actually not well need to rest as it is deemed somehow socially unacceptable. It is not the same for men who are brought up often looked after far longer then their mums with less of an expectation of being able to do so. Eg with cooking etc. I have found this was part of burning myself out so badly over the last years. I felt I had to be someone who actually I wasn't able to be cos I was ill and because I was pushing it was getting sicker and sicker trying to live up to this unrealistic expectation. These days I would be more inclined to do as your dh and just say fuck the washing up, do literally only what is essential with ds and rest alot. Generally i find I am now ill a lot less and for shorter peroids then before because I have allowed myself to be ill and recover, instead of adding spending energy to function normall which was actually needed to just be alive. It is a hard mindset, it is against the social norm, and can be incredibly frustrating.

That said i am currently working hard to achieve burn out. And i know i will regret this but I have planned for this and have a rest schedule in place for the rest of the week, which will allow me to get the very essential stuff done.

Wise words from bitchy. You are so right. I do find it almost impossible to stop completely when ill (which doesn't happen very often thanks to working with kids giving me a shit hot immune system). Even when DH steps in and tells me to relax I always blunder on maintaining I am alright.

He has got back up and is feeling better having done nothing but sleep. Fingers crossed.

Am going to have some of bitchy's . On a school night and everything.

Or is there any coincidence he has miraculously recovered in time to watch the football. Hmmmmmmm.

More needed.

Tbh ellie if he has what ds has atm he will burn out on energy and feel very grotty but will regain enough energy to function with a small amount of rest. Mostly and ear, nose throat low level temp thing. Ds is awfully tried and miserable when he first gets in from school but an hour or so after getting up gets a second wind but will quickly go back downhill again if he does anything much. A really annoying bug, proper ill but not really. iyswim.

My advice go pinch the bed and leave him to the football. take the with you!

Crikey, what a lot of chat on here today! And some good lists!

Toffee - if it's any consolation we've been to that very same galleon several times in the last 2 or 3 years and nothing on earth would get me on there, while the DCs and DH just go on over and over and over and over.

Bitchy - am very curious ao know what it was you did that was so scary in your bid to help DS, I thought nothing scared you! I try and do the same (going on rides not the bloody galleon though, flumes at the swimming pool, rope bridges, heights generally) to help DS with his fears.

Castle and Asheth - good to have you back

Nick - are you around? I just found your kitten thread as we are in exactly the same position, thinking about getting 1 or 2 (not sure yet) now the summer is over. Our cat rescue is having an open day next week, so going to go to that.

Ellie - well enough to watch the football, hmm? Will he be going to work tomorrow?

Well, spectacularly bad start to the day here. Woken at 5.30 by a car alarm, couldn't get back to sleep. Got up at 6.30, went downstairs. Dh forgot to put the DW on last night so no clean crockery. Great. Anyway, I had made a huge vat of pasta sauce in the slowcooker last night and left it to cool overnight, with the plan of blitzing it (hidden veg) and portioning it up for the freezer this morning. Couldn't find the stick blender so I decided to use the liquidiser. Which did the job very nicely. Until the sound suddenly changed and the level started dropping inside the jug. The blade had come undone at the bottom. Lifted it up, thick gloopy tomato sauce all over the machine, the counter, saved most of it by tipping it straight back into the slowcooker dish but all over the floor and doors en route tpo the other side of the kitchen. What a mess! Dh was in the middle of washing up by hand by then so he dealt with the washing up and I cleaned the floor, machine etc. Then I stubbed my little toe, hard. Then DD wanted to wear bright spotty socks to school. It just went on.

Anyway, got off to breakfast club, then off to work. We had a client quality audit today, I'm the quality manager, so the spotlight is on me. It all went very well and they went away happy by 3pm, so I was able to come home and have an hour on my own before picking the DCs up from after school club. But I wasted most of it MNing .

So, tonight, I have done some ironing, helped DD put all her clean clothes away and sorted out a massive pile for the charity shop. Today's mission was partly fulfilled (cleaning cabinet doors) owing to the liquidiser malfunction.

Links for Wednesday

Babystep 11 - write inspirational phrases in your control journal (if that is your cup of tea).

Mission - a quick clear out of the fridge.

Daily Focus is Anti Procrastination Day - all those jobs you've been putting off. I have a day off work tomorrow, so no excuses for me!

Just going to bed after more form-bashing. WhoKnows - your description of the start to your day really made me laugh, especially the finale, 'Then DD wanted to wear bright, spotty socks to school. It just went on.'

You are obviously more sensible than me because you won't even try the galleon. In my ignorance, I assumed it would be quite a gentle ride. The funny thing was that the man running the ride took one look at me getting on and told me how to stop the ride if I had to get off. How did he know?

Did you mention kittens? Who's getting kittens? Don't keep it to yourselves - it's not fair! I want to know about it. We still have four months to go until we can buy another kitten and I need to live vicariously through other cat owners in the meantime. (Photos please).

This evening went well. DS1's friend came round and we ordered pizza for us all. Result: very happy boys.

Night all.

Morning.

DS2 is off school today. He is very (very!) grumpy, says his feet are sore and his limbs don't feel as if they fit together .

The letter 'd' is sticking on my laptop. Anyone know how to unstick it? Otherwise my posts are going to start looking very odd.

Ta da :

Get dressed to socks
Bathroom swish & swipe
New handtowel
B/fast
D/W unloaded and reloaded
Kitchen surfaces wiped
Kitchen floor wiped
Room rescue in sitting room
Washing on

To dos :

Friend coming round for coffee
Errands in town (lots)
Home ed
Washing and ironing
Usual evening routine

Toffee - happy DS's and pizza sounds good to me. We are thinking about kittens, however there are some disagreements in the house. DH and the DCs are adamant it's got to be kittens, I'd be happy with an adult rescue cat. I think we should go to a rescue, DH wants to just find someone who has got kittens available, but we don't know anyone with a pregnant cat or kittens and I'm a bit reluctant to go down the Gumtree route. I can't work out why DH is so against the rescue route. Anyway, we'll see.

As for the galleon - he does say that about getting off every single time I should know I've spent enough hours sitting on those uncomfy bollards watching the bloody thing

Sometimes a quite young rescue cat is a good kitten subsitute! Still playful but has been neutered etc. Our "kittens" are a 1.5 years now but still leap around in the garden and do generally kittenish things (but don't try and climb your leg and rip the curtains as they did when little)

There are so many rescue kittens that if you do want kittens it shouldn't be difficult to find them, and not so much more expensive because they have been vaccinated. The homecheck business (although it appears tedious form filling) presumably is less hassle than the visits to the vet to have the vaccinations. I was lucky to have kittens from local friends for free but in the end I paid for the vaccination and neutering so it wasn't really free ifysim...

This morning both cats are snuggled up on dd's bed (she's at school) washing each other thoroughly.

done
woke up at 6.30 to get dd off to school
dealt with boys, and drove ds2 to school (terrible traffic, may revert to PTransport tomorrow)

dealt with rest of recycling (a few more clothes decluttered)

todo
take violin for repairs
email school about ds1's DCD diagnosis in case they never got it.
write some dates in the diary...feeling very avoidant about that!
email bookclub re: dates
TIDY MY BEDROOM
sweep yard
have a rest after lunch...very important if I'm going to cope with afternoons atm.. Yesterday was a bit more manageable due a nap from 2-3pm

oh yes and I have to fill in a form too

Damn it's so cold I can't move :(

whoknows Sorry I went out last night. We are still in discussions about the kittens. In theory I'd love pets but there's just soooo much to think about, not least my childminding, who clears poo up, and will they wreck the house. The open day sounds like a good idea though- I don't think you're too far from me...

Kaiser Chiefs were FANTASTIC last night, but I am so tired today. Serves me right for going out on a school night. I got home from work, ate some lunch and have done very little else. So it is a minimal list today:

Ta Da
Washed and tumbled 3 loads of washing (yes, it's still raining)
Washed dishes
Wiped around kitchen

To Do
Ironing
Wipe around bathroom and toilets
Dinner

I also have a PTA meeting at 3.30, DC x 3 have choir practice from 5-6 and DS1 has a piano lesson at 6.30. So another evening of rushing around.

Will read the thread now to catch up in order to avoid having to do any actual housework

Whoknows I will pm. The worst one was something that will induce proper full out panic attacks and did but others which were less stressful to me but I would still avoid at most costs.

been a busy day dealing with SN stuff. drained. Also run a shit load of errands. going out for a drink with a friend later. Flying was a tad lacking but meh.

Whoknows I will pm. The worst one was something that will induce proper full out panic attacks and did but others which were less stressful to me but I would still avoid at most costs.

been a busy day dealing with SN stuff. drained. Also run a shit load of errands. going out for a drink with a friend later. Flying was a tad lacking but meh.

Whoknows I will pm. The worst one was something that will induce proper full out panic attacks and did but others which were less stressful to me but I would still avoid at most costs.

been a busy day dealing with SN stuff. drained. Also run a shit load of errands. going out for a drink with a friend later. Flying was a tad lacking but meh.

I'll look forward to 3 PMs then bloody MN

Nick - I'll PM you. Once hopefully!

• 3 binliners of toys, 6 carrier bags of clothes and one of tupperware boxes to the charity shop today. Back later.

How the fuck did that post 3 times I am not even on a twat phone! I'm on the laptop which should be fine. I think I sent the pm so hopefully you will get it and it doesn't disappear into the ether. do feel free to let me know if you think it has.