We had a bit more of a less emotive conversation about it later last night. He's "stressed" because things are moving and he's "worried" about things that might have gone (I think it's more than that, to be honest). I calmly stated my position again. I cannot live in this house 24/7 staring at this stuff when there's no proper place for TS to play. I don't think he fully appreciates everything I gave up/got rid of when I moved here (and am therefore a bit resentful of random pieces of paper from 1991 when I have so little left).
Our shed (what it is) is full of outside stuff and random boxes. Our loft is rapidly filling of what is his. His parents' house is the same (with their own stuff, the things of his sisters and MrScout's). To give you an idea, they have a collection of toys in their lounge for the grandchildren (oldest being 12, the youngest is TS). All of the toys in there were MrScout's or his sisters'. MrScout is younger than me (33) and his oldest sisters are older than me (40). They've had some of these toys for 40 years. While I'm all for keeping one or two special things it screams volumes to me that instead of sharing these toys when they've all been outgrown they kept them stored, somewhere, for all of these years. And I presume when the last grandchild outgrows them (there's another on the way so TS won't be the youngest) they'll go back into storage.
I thought about this yesterday and while his parents are lovely people and I get along really well with them I do "blame" them to an extend. Apparently he was a bit like this when he was young and, for fear of upsetting him, didn't force the issue too much (I think a combination of being the youngest, the only boy and not wanting trigger seizures (MrScout does have a seizure disorder but I don't think they're triggered by external forces)). When they do push the issue they do it big and at once so it does set off a stressed & angry reaction. If it had been slow & steady it wouldn't be such a big deal. And I think this is part of the problem here I went too quickly and MrScout noticed.
On the one hand he's appreciative of what I've done/the space/things I've found but on the other hand it's a bit of "oh, crap, you moved this pile." We agreed that this weekend we're going to B&Q and are going to buy loads of "loft friendly boxes" (our loft hole isn't very big and we have to climb a step-ladded to get in so boxes can't be too bulky or heavy). We're then going to fling in everything of his that he wants but that I don't want in my living space. To be honest, we've done this exercise before but the boxes are still out and either collapsing under the weight (cardboard) or gathering dust in the house. I've said, and got him to agree, that I have complete control over what is mine and Toddler's. He got a bit panicy/stressed when I said I'd be in charge of "swapping out" TS's toys, wanting to know what "swapping out" meant so I had to patiently explain rotating toys (to which I got a bit of "oh, you do that a bit now"). I think I will push the issue of "put the boxes into the loft immediately." I did also get him to agree to shrink the Laura Table in our living room which takes up lots of space and aquires a lot of cr@p clutter (it doesn't collapse/come apart, which was my hope so we could store it and get more bookshelves). By shrinking it I clear up more floor space and there's less space for stuff. I'll use underneath to store the toy boxes and the top for bigger toys (like his FP castle) so it's less likely to aquire magazines, cords and random bit of paper.
And breathe. Thank you for listening to reading my rant. I feel a bit better this morning, especially with a firm plan in place.