Are there any benefits of Primary school that HE can't usually provide?

[carolinecordery]

Hello all, I haven't registered my DD for Reception, which she would be eligible to start in September.
I was just wondering if you thought there were any benefits of primary school that HE can't provide. What things are good about primary school that are only available through attending?
I'm planning to HE and am convinced of the benefits of doing so, but want a rounded picture. It's easy to think of loads of things that would be, relatively, a bit crap about primary school, but is there ANY really good reason to go? DD's non-resident dad would rather she went.
Thanks, Caroline

I think this thread is the longest running, by the looks of things. Going to take the facebook option as there are too many people talkin through their backsides not about school or H.ed who need to look up the word socialisation. That said I'm going back to my book about autonomous learning.

I think there are lots of positives about HE but that, like school, it isn't for all DCs. Some DCs are much better at school, some are much better with HE.
I don't know why we get into the polarised position of 'either' 'or' when it is purely another option. Lots of people seem to take this on board and have a DC at home and one at school.
It is like anything in education, the same as state or private, where it is merely an option and lots of people have DC s at both. People have DCs who pass the 11+ and another who doesn't.

I think that it is great if it suits your DC- I just get annoyed when it seems to have to go with running down schools and you start to get absolute rubbish about 'institutionalising' your child.

I would certainly HE if the choice was the schools mentioned by some people on here. I asked questions before mine went, the pastoral, social side was most important - 15 mins at break to make friends isn't something that I would want- not that I have come across it. I wouldn't send my DC s to a school where their learning was going to be disrupted by other DCs. I want the best for them and I consider that I got it.
People either make assumptions about schools based on when they went or they have very poor schools.
All schools run the whole range from excellent to dire. I know, from some of the most peculiar families that I know, that HEing parents are the same. The one thing HEers won't admit is that not everyone does it well. They close ranks and say that any parent is better than school and yet some are plainly damaging.

HE is just another option- quite plainly stated on GovDirect website- maybe better for your DC but not better for every DC.

I think it fine when you start with the DC in the centre' is it the best option for them?'. Where I think it is damaging is where it starts with an ideology and the DC has to fit it.

Done well, done with the right kids, I'm sure no one would have any argument against HE.

I agree with this. I think the problem on this thread is that people are comparing the best of HE with the worst of school education, and vice versa. In reality, there are some fantastic schools out there, and some great ways of doing HE, but there are also some pretty poor versions of each too. I suppose it's not surprising that those who have experienced the really good schools are less likely to HE, whereas those who haven't had such a good experience of school education will find it a preferable option. Done well, either option can provide an excellent education for our kids.

I think your last sentence sums it up Jinsei ( you have a nack of putting it well)

Unfortunately there are very poor schools and very poor HEers and they both damage DCs.
Luckily there are excellent schools and excellent HEers - the sadness is that all DCs don't get the best - (whether at home or school.)

Sirzy thanks.

A good primary school is lovely especially in reception. Amazing toys. I can't provide that amount of stuff to play with. Climbing frames, huge sandpit etc.

A bunch of kids to make friends with.

Teachers. Often very good teachers in primary.

It's a community. When it works that is. Mine had a ball in primary school. Absolutely loved it.

LeBFG - thank you. I have to say that I have met with many HE families over the years. All walks of life, different ideas and outlooks, some lentil weavers and some normals, some wealthy , some less so, all with happy kids. (obviously one gets exactly the same type of parent in school) but there was one family whose kids I did feel sorry for. Timetabled lessons from 8.30 to 4.30 followed by homework. That was one bunch of kids I felt sorry for. But the kids seemed happy enough with it, but leapt at the chance when I used to get them to come with me to the beach for the day. Then I found out the 'work' continued when they got home. No lesson was missed, and then had to write up a report of their day out with me, which I found all a bit controlling.

This is the only family I have met like that. I am sure there are families in school who continue to get their kids studying the minute they get in from school. But it did make me feel sad.

Just going back to the fact that people don't know home education is an option-I don't think they can have tried very hard-it is hardly a secret!

Just as an experiment I tried googling all sorts such as 'alternatives to school', 'my child is unhappy at school','can I educate you my child at home?''legal rights of parents','do children have to attend school' -even 'teaching at home' and each time you get the answer straight away. If they can't manage that I really don't think they are fit to do it! Libraries have computers. You can drop into CAB when passing or you could phone up the LEA and say, 'my child hates school, what are the alternatives?'

I can't believe that adults don't know this-they may have no cause if they and their child are perfectly happy with school-but if they are not it is perfectly simple to find out!

exoticfruits I don't want to sound confrontational, but am afraid I'm going to - its not really your place to judge anyone's fitness to HE or not. And certainly not on the basis you mentioned. It's open to everyone, no matter what their abilities (just like having children!). I have friends who are not computer literate and have asked me to use google for them. I would never use that as a measure of how capable they are in other areas.

I come across adults all the time who ask me what HE is and if it's legal. I don't think that it can be said that knowledge of it is widespread IMHO.

Exotic I really wonder why you feel the need to keeponkeeponkeeponkeeponkeepon banging the same drum? You made that point at tedious length way upthread - are you so desperate to keep the thread going that you're just going to recycle the same points now? Noone responded to my posts ('cept Sirzy), but I don't see any value in restating and restating them until someone takes notice.

And going onandonandon about why noone would tell you how you could and why you should HE your own children... did it not occur to you that people weren't responding to your post because noone did think you should or must HE your children? Personally I couldn't give a flying fuck whether your (or anybody else's) kids are schooled or HE - it's a personal choice.

You have dominated this thread in exactly the same way that I've seen you dominate other threads on HE. Is it some deep seated resentment about your friend who HEs or something? Or feeling threatened because you're a teacher?

I have determinedly ignored you in the past because you say you want a reasoned debate (which I'm very happy to have and consider the pros and cons of HE) but then you slide in lots of sly criticisms and inflammatory statements, and then just keep on going like the duracell bunny.

Well that's enough of that.

Incidentally, I wanted to say a big thank you to Sirzy for pointing me towards the St John's Ambulance Badgers for my DD. Not only will she be attending their group, but on finding out about what StJ'sA do, I've just volunteered to train as a community first responder.

See... I expect I could have found them myself if I'd only known what to google, but it had never occurred to me that they had a youth group, or indeed that you could volunteer in the capacity I just have. Maybe I'm not fit to volunteer though, if I didn't know about them already?

Oh and while I'm ranting posting, personally I would find it enormously valuable to hear Seeker's experience of HE - whether they were positive, negative of ambivalent.

I'll shut up now.

Hope you both have fun! I have been involved for 15 years and love it

Lol NonAstermia - I'd never heard of SJA Badgers either! And I'd spent some time on google and asking friends/family etc a while ago trying to find an alternative to Beavers (DS was too young then). I discovered Wood Craft folk (or whatever they're called) but not Badgers. Found out last night there's a group two roads away!

So yes, completely agree. Although I don't know that it's a bad thing keeping the thread going (except rising blood pressure) - there's been a few new members to the fb group :)

I wasn't that enthusiastic about the scouts, and we have no woodcraft folk branches near here. I had no idea about this and it sounds perfect; lots of fun and I think that first aid is an exceptionally valuable thing to learn at any age. I do quite a bit of anatomy and physiology with her so this would fit in with that really well too. I have a background and interest in healthcare, have done first aid training in the past and would love to do more, so it's perfect for me, too! Thanks again.

NonAstemia, sorry

I'm one of those new members notatschool.

DB loved Scouts - it was one of the best things he did as a child. Plus DS's friends go, and our local group is only one road away
Will def bear Badgers in mind if he ever wants to do something different, or maybe for the DDs. Good to know!

What is Badgers? Any in Herts?

DS7 has been in SJA Badgers for a full year & they do extremely little First Aid (none at all that I can remember).

Scouts they go a bit nutty ime, but that's exactly what they need & love, all that risk taking.

I have another DC concurrently in Guides, btw, if you want to hear detailed comparisons! Dreamy bold girl stuff.

Have to say, back to thread topic, DC have never made a close friend from any of their clubs. I would go further & say that they have almost failed to make moderate friends even in their many, many clubs. Clubs just aren't remotely like the intensity of the daily school experience (where they have made close friends, including friends they never saw out of school hours). DS12 has come nearest to acquiring good mates from a club, in Scouts & cycle race training, he keeps meaning to get full names & phone numbers.

I suspect it's easier to acquire good mates from clubs when they are older (past primary age) & do more about keeping their own social lives alive.

Colleger - badgers is the St John Ambilance group for 5-11 year olds. They are located throughout the country if you go to www.sja.org.uk you will be able to find units close to you.

They work towards the Super Badger award which they can pick from a wide range of topics including adventure badger, global badger, hungry badger and they also do first aid. What they do is worked around the needs of the children in the Sett which works well. Most counties also have fun days/residential weekends for the badgers which give the chance to mix with badgers (and often cadets) from elsewhere.

This thread is a perfect example of why home edders can be defensive.

People who don't HE give a list of things they think school provides that HE doesn't.
Home Edders say they can provide those things and give examples of how.
People who don't HE tell them that their definitions of socialisation/privacy/whatever is incorrect and they're basically doing it wrong.
Home educators get arsey in return.
Non home educators get arsey.
And on and on it goes.

It gets MY back up and I don't even HE!
I did HE for 3 years but my DS1 asked to go to school and started 5 weeks ago. He absolutely loves it. I could go on an on about how great either HE or school is.

Bear in mind that home educators are also inclined to say that schools are only good for child care, that schooled children are "institutionalised" and that nobody who doesn't home educate has a right to an opinion. Even though it's OK for them to make sweeping and often inaccurate generalisations about school based education. And, bizarrely, that's all right for them to be rude to people who haven't been rude to them on this forum because people in RL sometimes are!

The is not a single school using parent on this thread who has not said that there are lots of things wrong with schools and lots of things right about HE. Not one.

Ahh people that don't HE on this thread HAVE been rude. Not all but there's definitely been unpleasantness. Both sides, I do agree that there's been rudeness from the HE side too. It's mad as to be on these threads you clearly are passionate and involved with your child's education (however you do it) so you'd think we'd find a common ground.

I feel torn to stick up for school when HE's are rude about it but also want to defend HE when people are rude about that!

OP I've found the benefit of school to HE is the ease of trying new things. At school there's opportunity to try new musical instruments or fancy art stuff or cool trips. You can provide all this in HE but it's a lot more effort and will cost.

My DS1 would tell you school dinners are so much better at school than at home! Cheeky swine.

A very selfish benefit is that my two boys are apart for 6 hours and I have 6 hours of bicker free time.

Seeker, if you are referring to my comment about schools being institutions I suggest you read it again. This is my opinion and at no time have I suggested that your children are institutionalised or others for that matter. However, it is my wish not to have my child institutionalised as this is how I see it. You are quite welcome to disagree if you like. An opinion or feeling cannot be wrong. For the record I am not a H.eder. I think I have only disagreed with your interpretation of socialisation. I also believe others have disagreed with you too, its what debate or sharing info is about. It would be a boring world if we all agreed.

Not specifically referring to you, morethan. However, now you have brought it up, I do think it's a bit disingenuous of you to assert that when you say things about your child not needing be institutionalised to learn, as I think you did, (forgive me if you didn't, I haven't searched back), the implication is that the children of those of us who are at school are institutionalised.

And if you weren't implying this, how come it's OK for HE ers to take everything anyone might query about HE as a personal attack on their child and their choices, but those of us who choose school are expected to take attacks on school as general and not applying to all school children?