On cruise and kids so ungrateful and bored

[Fishnchips22]

On our first ever week long cruise, ship is amazing, loads to do. Family of four, kids are 19 and 12. They’ve enjoyed some
of it but now can’t be bothered to get up in the morning, spend loads of time on phones, haven’t done the pool/slides etc. DH pretty lazy too, so unless I organise stuff we don’t do anything. I’m so frustrated, last day today and I’m off doing my own thing cos they can’t be bothered. I’m just so fed up, it was a very expensive holiday and I’ve had a crap year with losing a parent and just wanted some lovely family time. My 12 year old DD just can’t be bothered, despite being blown away by the ship when we first boarded. I went to a show last night on my own as none of them fancied it. And just had lunch on my own as they were still in bFeel like holidaying on my own in future and saving my money! I just feel they’re so ungrateful. Does anyone else have this?

Sack them all off next time OP and go away with your mates, you'll have a lot more fun!

@TheDogsPaws

well it’s not really because some other people do agree!

I know it is probably really frustrating for you, especially knowing how much money you've spent and the dreaming of what an amazing holiday it would be for you all. I think your DH could do a bit more of the activities so you are not on your own.

But for your 2 kids, I can sort of see where they're coming from. My parents took us on a 2 week long dream holiday to Disney when I was a teen. Biggest holiday we'd ever been on, must have taken them years to save and plan. But honestly, I didn't enjoy it. It was so hot, and everywhere was really busy and everyday they had a really packed itinerary planned. I was exhausted from the sun, and quite honestly once we'd done 1 theme park (queuing for hours on end) I kind of felt done with them. I'd had loads of intense exam prep to do before we went away and I did want to just relax by the pool. My Mum was furious with me for most of the trip because I wasn't enjoying it in the way she wanted, and it created a lot of tension. Looking back through adult eyes I can see how she would have put every penny + her heart and soul into that trip. But I was a teen, how on earth was I to understand, plus it was her dream trip, not mine.

I think October half term holidays can often be dodgy, the autumn term is the most tiring and often kids/teens want to chill.

I agree. However the op's eldest is 19, not many teens of that age want to go away with their parents, they'd rather be with their friends.

@LuckySantangelo35

Then they're also clueless with old fashioned views.

You didn't answer, do you have children and if so how old are they?

People here have some very odd preconceptions about cruises! Modern cruise ships are huge, like floating cities. You get to see a different place almost every day, loads of speciality restaurants to try - so many you could literally eat at a different one every night if you wanted to on many ships (and obviously the buffet restaurants but you don’t have to go to those at all if you don’t want to)! Lovely views of the ocean, ocean sunsets, waking up to a different view / different country every day! People are so misinformed and snobby about cruises, when most of the people who have these views have never even been on one!

Pigeonqueen, I'm sure some cruises are really lovely and luxurious. I don't think anyone doubts that but, you get what you pay for.

Of course, like anything else. But saying “cruises are full of oldies” and people talking about them like they’re being put in a hamster wheel is just nonsense. That’s not what most cruises are like now, at all. I am the type of introvert who absolutely can’t stand being around others all the time, I hate live entertainment and I can’t stand busy dining rooms etc but cruising is my favourite type of holiday. You can just do whatever you like to suit yourself. If you like staying in a decent hotel, with nice food and a changing view - that’s basically what it is. Everything else is entirely optional.

A cruise is a terrible holiday idea for anyone under 70 !

A cruise is a terrible holiday idea for anyone under 70 ! It’s really not, I’ve taken my DC on 18 and we’ve had a lot of fun.

Such an outdated view.

You can just do whatever you like to suit yourself. If you like staying in a decent hotel, with nice food and a changing view - that’s basically what it is. Everything else is entirely optional.

Except if you are with someone like OP, or a few others on the thread, who think you're ungrateful because you don't want to spend time on your cruise in the way that she thinks you should.

It really isn't.
A group of us went on a cruise this summer. One family included grandparents (aged 72 and 75). They probably enjoyed it the least!! The teenagers and tweens were the most evangelical about the whole thing.

Ridiculous comment 🤣

If you choose the right cruise line and ship, they are amazing!

Ok I stand corrected

Quite honestly I would have left them to it from day one and enjoyed myself everyday.

I'd be livid too op, I'd be having strong words...i would be saying 19 yr old can get off at next port and get themselves home, DH and 12 yr old left to it and do my own thing, in the future holiday on my own.

I can't believe how mean the OP is. Forcing her children to go on a lovely cruise. An adventure! and something different for them to experience.

@MSLRT 🤣 She’s cruel, isn’t she?!

🙄 The issue is that OP had an expectation that her children should be enjoying themselves in the way that she thinks is enjoyable, like getting up early to do things and being in the pools. People have different ways of enjoying holidays.

What if her children tried to insist that OP did things their way, got up late and lounged around like they are, would that be ok? No.

The trick is to accept that holidays with older kids are different to when they were 5 and accept everyone has a different way of enjoying themselves on holiday.

OPs way isn't right, it's just right for her, same with her kids and husband. Arrange to eat some meals together and agree some things you'll all do, if possible, and then get on with what you want alone if necessary instead of moaning that everyone isn't doing what you want them to.

Exactly it has taken time for me to grasp that for DS spending days in the villa and by the pool is his holiday rather than loads of day trips that is DD holiday

Sorry I'm a bit wary ( terrified) of boats in case that wasn't clear. Not a great fan of flying either actually. The gastro thing is definitely true though, happens all the time. If other people like cruises that's great ( and obviously a lot do) but it's just not for me and maybe not for the OP's children. That's what I meant. Oh and the CDC has reported 10 outbreaks of norovirus on cruiseships just this year. That's just the US. And then you basically get locked in your room to vomit. Fun times!!!
Anyway sorry OP , pp was right my response wasn't helpful. Could you all hang out at the pool together? Take the 19yo to the nightclub? Is there an older kids club for the 12yo?

Some people like holidays where they are doing things all the time, action-packed, where as others just want an actual restful holiday while resting, sleeping late, taking it easy and doing nothing. You just have different styles, that's all. None of you is right or wrong, you just want different things from holidays.

I looked up the CDC and it's report.
Cruise ships
Norovirus is the most frequent (over 90%) cause of outbreaks of diarrheal disease on cruise ships. These outbreaks often get media attention, which is why some people call norovirus the "cruise ship virus." However, norovirus outbreaks on cruise ships account for only a small percentage (1%) of all reported norovirus outbreaks.

1% is pretty good and it's because cruise ships take the risk seriously. There's always lots of cleaning and polishing going on.
To be fair if I ever got norovirus I would rather be confined to my cabin on a ship and watch the sea go by on my balcony, than in a static hotel.