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Original poster

Mozhe IS NOT going back to work next week after all......

818 replies

mozhe · 16/07/2007 13:36

.....no, have decided to delay it by a week or so......Mr Mozhe is on 'incubator watching' duties....P-in-L's are manning the home front,( and DSsX3...), with nice new aupair....and Mozhe,Nanny and DTs are off to St Barts,( in lovely Carribean...),for a week's sun/swim/chill out !!
Any one been before ? Any pointers ? Off first thing tomorrow......

OP posts:

BocoBeak · 16/07/2007 14:40

I don't believe this is real. It just makes no sense at all - it's not just a different way of doing things, its ridiculous.

If Mozhe is a psychiatrist she'd know how crazy she sounds. She'd also surely have the understanding and intelligence to realise that this thread was never going to be a 'crocs and sarongs' thread. She would know that people generally would think this is insane, and cruel.

When my baby was in scbu for only a week i couldn't even travel the 20 miles to go back home and pick up more stuff, could't go to the hospital canteen.

There are so many things about all her posts that make me feel that this just isn't a real person.

edam · 16/07/2007 14:41

I'm surprised at the venom directed towards Mozhe. OK, her choices aren't those that most people would make. So what? You can point that out quite reasonably if you feel it's necessary without making her out to be a bad mother.

I've visited a SCUBU. If someone happend to tell me (and why would they, anyway?) that one of the mothers had gone on holiday with her other children but the father had stayed back, I'd think it was maybe unusual but clearly suited them.

Why do so many people expect a stranger to live fit their prescription for the mother of a prem. baby?

Kewcumber · 16/07/2007 14:41

sensible post luella.

edam · 16/07/2007 14:43

Bonding schmonding, it's not something that happens to a precise timetable set by complete strangers. '05.00 hours give birth, 05:30 hours bond'.

Cammelia · 16/07/2007 14:43

For her own sake edam

madamez · 16/07/2007 14:43

Oh FFS, yet more emotional incontinence. THe baby is being well cared for and the mother knows her own personality well enough to be sure she will feel better for a break. People react differently to just about everything, and there is nothing wrong with what she's doing any more than it's wrong of people with prem babies to want to sit in the unit 24/7 (getting in the nurses' way all the time...)

LittleLupin · 16/07/2007 14:48

madamez, there is a difference between not being in SCBU 24/7 and getting on a plane and flying thousands of miles away.

ProjectSeverus · 16/07/2007 14:48

kewcumber there was a v interesting thread a while ago about new mothers weird and wonderfull)mad? mental?) moments.

someone, not sure who posted about her experiences when adopting her dds who were pretty young iirc. She was far more calm and in control than the ones who had given birth.

the basic gist was that pregnancy and post natal hormones do send you a bit loopy hence concern.

TootyFrooty · 16/07/2007 14:50

Gosh, I had no idea it was emotionally incontinent to want to be with your preemie baby.

You learn something new every day on MN.

chopster · 16/07/2007 14:51

this has to be the biggest load of bolleaux I have ever read.

skiing 2 week pn and the obs approves?! the staff and psychologist also approve of you swanning off and leaving your newborn?!

Maybe the second point is true, and you are that loopy they are glad to have you out of the way!

I know if it was my dp, he would have an absolute fit at the idea, you are supposed to be supporting each other through a difficult time, but it appears you don't give a flying f**k!

Tortington · 16/07/2007 14:52

I think your all a bunch of twats.

if i could have fecked off on holiday after giving bith i think i would have done.

her husband is quite capable -ad we dont all sit aroud in scabu - wtching the fish bowl and sobbing.

if she has had the correct medical advice ( am presuming she s fucking loaded - so will have excellent medical advice) then fine.

i think to say she doesn't deserve children or imply that she is a bad mother becuase she's not sobbing, becuse shes coping very well, becuase shes not depressed, becuase shes absolutley fine - is itself bolleaux.

If your argument is "why o rich barstardshjave kids and ass them on to nanny , aupair " then start another thread.

again if your argument is "why do mums go back to ork ater haing chilren" start anther thread
" why do rich folk go to work aftr having kids " ....you get the picture

shinysink · 16/07/2007 14:53

. Many moons ago I posted on here under a different talk name which now escapes me - so couldn't use it when I re-registered. At the time I was posting here before though there was a very convincing poster named JudgeFlounce. Claimed to be a QC and invented a child who had died - JF turned out to be a bloke - as far as I recall a childless one too.
Sorry if I doubt you mozhe but you sound pretty suspect to me. My DS was ill at birth and needed to be cared for in SCBU - wild horses would not have dragged me away from him. Sorry - just cannot believe you are real.

Cammelia · 16/07/2007 14:54

"getting in the nurses way" Madamez? What are you on ?

Interesting that mohze, having run her holiday plans past every expert available then turns to mumsnet for advice on sarongs and crocs

nearlythere · 16/07/2007 14:55

custardo-

edam · 16/07/2007 14:57

Great post, Custy.

And to say 'for her own sake' ie she should hang around for someone else's view of the magical bonding process that will be fatally interrupted by going on holiday is just patronising. Mozhe knows her situation better than any of us, she's perfectly capable of judging what is best for her family.

ElenyaTuesday · 16/07/2007 14:57

Madamez, I'm with you on this one. I don't see the need for all this rudeness. The baby will be looked after by his father - what's wrong with that? The medics have said that it is unlikely anything will go wrong with the baby. If Mohze is happy to go away, good for her, I hope she has a great time.

peanutbear · 16/07/2007 14:57

its a wind up surely

if not enjoy your holiday wouldnt you prefer to take whole family later on in the year though

Kewcumber · 16/07/2007 14:58

I'm sure they do Severus - wouldn't dream of commenting on the rights/wrongs of making decision two weeks after giving birth not having experiences it. And haven't commented on the "rightness" of it here either for exactly that reason. ("Have no idea what I would feel in her position.") Merely stating that she didn't ask for our opinion (accept that people are entitled to comment anyway) and the many posters who said "well I wouldn't do it" were really neither here nor there.

Don't think that the various suggestions that she check into a high security mental institution (amongst others) are really trying to have a serious discussion with her about her mental health (though I agree others are).

For the record (and slightly off the point) you might be interested to know that post adoption depression is far more common than PND.

MhamaiJane · 16/07/2007 14:58

I'm disgusted at this thread and not at the op but the snipey vile personal attacks.

Parp

TranquilaManana · 16/07/2007 14:58

i think the vitriol is out of order.
am as sure as i can be that its not what id choose to do... but shes hardly leaving him out in the woods to fend for himself, is she??

mozhe - i would avoid letting people on holiday know about the baby. you prob dont need vitriol thrown at you there too.

ElenyaTuesday · 16/07/2007 15:00

Oh, x-posted with custardo - good for you!!!!

WigWamBam · 16/07/2007 15:01

Bloody hell.

Mozhe's choice wouldn't have been one I could have made, but some of the comments aimed at her on this thread are just vile.

Good old supportive MN, eh?

Kewcumber · 16/07/2007 15:01

peanuitbear - flying with a ventilated baby is not recommended for 12 months after. Presume Mozhe doesn't want to wait that long so they are splitting the holdiay between them and taking half the DC's each week.

LittleLupin · 16/07/2007 15:01

I think mozhe is bonkers going so far away, but I agree that saying she doesn't deserve to have children etc is going too far.

JeremyVile · 16/07/2007 15:02

Mozhe, i hope you have a lovely time, get to relax, unwind and catch up with your DTs.

Of course your newest addition will be fine, as fine as he would be if you were there, the fact is that, sadly, his welfare and health are not in your hands atm, the medical staff will continue to care for him.

You're a strong lady so im sure (i hope) that some of these ridiculous and viscious comments will be like water off a ducks back.

All the best.

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