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Higher education

Talk to other parents whose children are preparing for university on our Higher Education forum.

Original poster

Expected to be guarantor for halls?

214 replies

ThisMustBeMyDream · 21/02/2022 19:19

My son has applied for halls today and paid a deposit. He then tells me he has put my name down as guarantor afterwards! I'm furious with him, but that can be dealt with later.
Right now I am very concerned as I can not be his guarantor. I am not anywhere near in a financial position to find £600 a month if he messes up. I have younger children to consider, so can not be guarantor. I asked the only person I could think of who it wouldn't affect (my dad) and he said an outright no.
So can my son not go to uni without a guarantor? I've been naive here, but I didn't expect this. He is almost 20, and earns good money whilst at college. He has more disposable income than me by miles. I was assuming that they would look at his income (which is currently 15k pa. working 24 hours pw. He will drop to 10k pa plus student loan of 9k so will have a higher over all income next year) but it seems they just do this automatically.
Can anyone advise?

OP posts:
Wartywart · 21/02/2022 20:10

Are you perhaps resentful of him going? Does he help out a lot with his younger siblings? Are you angry with him because he won't be able to do that now perhaps?

user1471504747 · 21/02/2022 20:10

Set him up a Monzo. Tell him when he gets his student loan payment he must put enough to cover the rent in a locked pot that he will only be able to access 2 days before rent is due.

Unless you’re going to drip feed that he spends all his money on drugs I don’t think you have anything to worry about. The majority of students don’t have an issue paying their rent, particularly if their student loan does cover it.

hunder · 21/02/2022 20:10

Does he have a history of being irresponsible? Is he likely to not pay his rent?
If he has a track record then you are absolutely justified, but as have said it's perfectly normal for parents to sign as a guarantor.

FindingMeno · 21/02/2022 20:11

It's not his fault this is the situation, but it's a shit expectation.

Original poster
ThisMustBeMyDream · 21/02/2022 20:11

Well @PAFMO I am a single parent, and had him as a 16 year old myself. I have spent the last 20 years desperately trying to be a good mother to all 3, but that means sometimes making tough choices. I wish I was in a position not to care. But I'm not. I have no savings to fall back on. I have a disabled child amongst the 3 of them, and this restricts my earning capacity significantly as despite my own degree, I can only work part time.
But yeah, thanks for jumping to the most ridiculous conclusions. I've given my life to the 3 of them, but I won't put myself in a further precarious position because it doesn't affect just me.

OP posts:
user1471504747 · 21/02/2022 20:13

@user1471504747

Set him up a Monzo. Tell him when he gets his student loan payment he must put enough to cover the rent in a locked pot that he will only be able to access 2 days before rent is due.

Unless you’re going to drip feed that he spends all his money on drugs I don’t think you have anything to worry about. The majority of students don’t have an issue paying their rent, particularly if their student loan does cover it.

Or if he has the money in savings get him to split it into 3 locked pots.

Or to put £600 in a locked pot.

Don’t think you’ve got any reason not to sign OP

FinnulaFloss · 21/02/2022 20:13

He can't 'put you down' as a Guarantor. Unless you sign a legal document, you're liable for nothing.

Libertybear80 · 21/02/2022 20:15

It's pretty standard to be honest. Most student rentals want either proof of a big bank balance or the parent to be guarantor.

Schoolchoicesucks · 21/02/2022 20:15

He's done it without thinking. As you're his mum, it's expected to be a parent. He expects you to be on his team and as his support. He doesn't expect to default on his rent and you to have to bail him out.

If you've not signed the agreement, I don't see how you could be held to it. If it's a university owned hall, they are unlikely to hold him (or his guarantor) to a full year rent in the event he did drop out/default.

He sounds responsible and hard working.

Halls is the easier part - shared houses or flats with private landlords carry on asking for guarantor to secure a tenancy. My dniece graduated last summer and her parents had to guarantee her (SE) rent despite her having secured a FT job.

Please don't be furious with him. Please do think of ways you can support him - pp's have suggested there may be insurance type companies that offer this. Could you find one that he could afford to pay (or you or your father could).

Of course you shouldn't have to risk your and your other dc's financial stability, but it's tough out there for students and young people - the system is not set up for them to be able to do this alone.

Libertybear80 · 21/02/2022 20:19

This may be an unpopular view but this is one reason I only had 2 kids. There is such a naivety about the financial responsibility involved. I remember mother in law asking if we were going to have more and me saying it would cost too much when they go to Uni and her being surprised I was even thinking about that.

Mrstwiddle · 21/02/2022 20:21

Poor boy, I feel really sorry for him for you to have that reaction. If he can’t rely on his own mother for support, then he’s in a pretty rubbish situation.

Ohbuggeritsme · 21/02/2022 20:22

We've been guarantor for DSS in uni for 4 years. Never once had an issue. Plus he may well have out your name down, but without you actually signing anything you won't be guarantor x

Original poster
ThisMustBeMyDream · 21/02/2022 20:24

He has a track record for not considering things or understanding what he is agreeing to.
My biggest concern is him deciding to either jack the job in (he did threaten to do this when he started at uni) and think he can somehow live on £250 a month after being used to over 1k. Or that he will decide the course isn't for him and pack it in leaving no student loan to cover costs, but the accommodation still needs paying for. He could have gone down a few course routes at uni, he chose this particular one, but there is always the chance he could decide that one of the other options was better.
He's a "young" 19. I suspect a lot are, but it does concern me. I'm not sure how sensible he will be.

What the fuck @Wartywart. Jfc. No I'm not resentful of him going. He is going because I financially supported him through 4 years at college after his first two years left him with no ucas points. I encouraged him to go back if his dream was to go to uni - so that is what he did. I don't take a penny from him, his wages are his to pay for driving lessons, clothes, savings and fun. Whatever really. I want him to have a happy life. I'm also acutely aware that he is really not worldly wise, despite me trying to teach him. So forgive me for being somewhat concerned at a legal obligation that he may not understand what position he is putting me in - even when pointed out to him. He might be intellectual enough for uni, but that doesn't equal common sense!

OP posts:
SD1978 · 21/02/2022 20:25

If you haven't signed anything to say that he's discussed it/ you agree- can you actually be held liable? Or is it more a box ticking? Surely even if he did stop paying, with no proof from you that you agreed, then they wouldn't be able to ask you for the money?

SandyIrvine · 21/02/2022 20:27

DDs uni (Edinburgh) will act as guarantor if a student doesn't have anyone suitable/willing. Could he check whether his uni will do similar? I think its usually international students who use it but there must be some UK students who apply too.

HeddaGarbled · 21/02/2022 20:27

Unless you know him to be irresponsible, surely this is just a formality. He needs a guarantor; his mum is the obvious choice; he pays his rent; everything is totally fine.

He must know that you won’t be able to bail him out, and any responsible young person in his situation would ensure that you don’t have to. Don’t you trust him?

ThroughThickAndThin01 · 21/02/2022 20:28

@Mrstwiddle

Poor boy, I feel really sorry for him for you to have that reaction. If he can’t rely on his own mother for support, then he’s in a pretty rubbish situation.
Agree. Poor lad.
fuckoffjournalists · 21/02/2022 20:30

It is totally unreasonable for you to be furious. You can’t be a guarantor without signing anyway, talk to your son reasonably and show some support.

Friendofdennis · 21/02/2022 20:32

The student union should be able to advise. Not all parents can afford to be Guarantors This discriminated against students from financially disadvantaged families

Libertybear80 · 21/02/2022 20:34

Also he needs to apply for scholarships funds. Likely to get if first in the family going to university. Some homework needed to be done really to save yourself this stress.

gamerchick · 21/02/2022 20:34

Ignore the people saying you're a shit mother. It's not about taking over payments if he defaults, it's bailiffs when it's a mega amount of defaults.

I wouldn't be a guarantor either. You don't need to sign the paperwork when you get it. He needs to think of something else.

LIZS · 21/02/2022 20:37

Is it private halls? Don't recall guaranteeing either of ours when in uni accommodation.

dancinfeet · 21/02/2022 20:39

Very confused by your attitude- I’m on the bare bones of my arse financially but wouldn’t have dreamed of not being college guarantor for either of my daughters- I trust that I have raised them well enough to pay their rent and not screw up / let me down.

titchy · 21/02/2022 20:41

£250 a month after paying rent is quite a normal amount for students to live on so I wouldn't worry about that!

What accommodation is it though - it's very unusual for a uni halls to need a guarantor. Is he sure that's what it was?

And as others have said, you can't be a guarantor if you haven't signed anything.

Finally just to comment on something you said earlier - 'He has a track record for not considering things or understanding what he is agreeing to' - he's 19, has never lived independently - they're all like that! That's why we as parents still have to look out for them.

The student loan is paid at the beginning of each term btw, with rent usually due for the whole term a week later.

EveryAvenue · 21/02/2022 20:47

This is very normal. Myself and all of my friends had to have guarantors. My Dad even acted ask mine for me whilst I was doing my MA as most places ask for them automatically when you’re a student. He’s never had to pay anything.

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