Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Higher education

Talk to other parents whose children are preparing for university on our Higher Education forum.

Flip

1 2 ··· 7 8 9 ··· 39 40

Original poster

Oxford / Cambridge - current students support / chat thread

994 replies

DadDadDad · 09/11/2021 07:25

Continuing a thread for anyone who wants to talk about their sons' and daughters' experience being a student in Oxford or Cambridge. (Or nephews, granddaughters, sisters, uncles - or if you or they have now graduated but you want to share your thoughts - all are welcome!)

I have a DS in his second year at Oxford, studying a small humanity in a tiny college.

Over to you...

OP posts:

ErrolTheDragon · 21/11/2021 23:02

Guess what my DDs 21st birthday present was (or rather wasn't) ...the ski trip 2020. she's still got an open rain cheque on that if she can get her pals together at some point in the next few years.

DottyHarmer · 22/11/2021 11:43

It is a pain that two years’ worth of students are competing for everything. At DD’s college every single student from all three years applied for parents’ hall. The formal formal hall dinners are pounced on immediately too.

It should (fingers mega crossed) be only this year, but it is frustrating, particularly of course for last year’s mob.

goodbyestranger · 22/11/2021 12:00

Yes Dotty DD was there with fingers on the button at the appointed hour for formal hall and bang - nothing.

beeswain · 22/11/2021 17:58

DS missed out on formal hall too, tickets were gone in a flash he said. He has got drinks with the tutors this week though so a little milestone. He seems to have been playing chess most weeks and might even manage to go climbing this week too so things are definitely improving. He has also applied for a summer internship with a tech start up by recent Oxford graduates which from initial contact looks very promising. He was much more chipper today and even joked that the college scouts have put their foot down about him cleaning his own bathroom and say they MUST start doing it now so standards don't drop...(which I guess means the college is getting ready for conferences and the like during vacations). All very normal

mutterphore · 22/11/2021 20:31

@Unescorted, I'm pleased to hear your DD was able to recuperate and get back to college last week.

@Pantjog, I hope your DS is feeling better and better and lovely to hear you got to see your DD in a musical performance. That sounds lovely.

@Beeswain, your DS is going from strength to strength and sounds like he's really enjoying himself.

Neither of mine has ever been skiing or even been on a foreign family holiday/ abroad (or a plane) so won't be going on the ski trip but both still seem to be thriving and we all met up in London again recently - although very briefly.

The rather hilarious contrast between their O & C experiences continues, although both seem remarkably happy. DS2 (O) has now been to 17 formals whereas DS1 (C) has only been at two. Food quality seems massively better too at DS1's college. Not only that, they've been attending various events related to their possible career path (probably the same career aspiration too, so the comparison will never stop!). The events that DS2 (O) has been to have involved sumptuous 4 course meals with game bird on the menu (which he'd never had before as it's rather 'posh') - and all this proper wining and dining. The exact same companies have run events in C that DS1 has attended but these have only consisted of a cheap glass of wine and a soggy canape! DS1 - the real 'foodie' of my two - is not impressed!

CinnamonJellyBeans · 22/11/2021 21:47

DD also missed out on the varsity ski trip. She was disappointed, as she's been looking forward to it since before she got to C. She has been to lots of different formals and is going to a ball this term. I'm really looking forward to all the photos.

Workload doesn't seem to be as crushing as last year.

She has been pretty under the weather all term though.

HewasH2O · 23/11/2021 08:00

DD is complaining Beeswain that tickets for formal are being snatched up in an instant. They have complained to the College that freshers are booking tickets for guests and nobody else is getting a look in.

goodbyestranger · 23/11/2021 08:07

Maybe second years should have priority next term?

Ginpostersyndrome · 23/11/2021 08:14

It seems as though DD is lucky. There are 3 formals a week so she has been 3 or 4 times. She's missed out on the parent formals though as they have sold very quickly.

FlyingSquid · 23/11/2021 08:23

Tentatively joining the thread to say that DD has had a very mixed first term but might be starting to find her feet now she's finished having every bug under the sun.

lunarlandscape · 23/11/2021 08:24

Hi,

I've hopped in and out of here since we were all doing the Oxbridge applicant threads, but I've name changed a few times.

Just reading all these problems with formal hall tickets. DS is 2nd year at a small college and seems to have formal hall several times a week. Bit he is in the choir so maybe that's built in. You've reminded me of parents' hall tickets which we haven't heard a thing about since before he started as a fresher, so might chase him on that.

He has had some stressful weeks, doing a joint honours, when they pile 3 essays on him in a week, as well as lab work! But overall he's happy. In love, working hard and having a bit of a social life too, so the balance is quite good. But he's aiming for a first in joint honours which means he works way way harder than I did when I was a student. I find myself being the opposite of the textbook parent and saying, 'But you are going to parties too, aren't you?'

HewasH2O · 23/11/2021 09:17

DD can't really complain. She had 5 months on site when others were still at home last year and her college was still running formals then. She has far too much work still to do this term to worry about such things! She's never been very good at hovering over a button & pressing refresh time after time. She tends to look out if the window at the wrong moment.

She did manage to find a nice house for next year. It has a garage. When did student digs start to come with a garage?

FlyingSquid · 23/11/2021 09:44

DD is pretty fed up that she didn't get into her college's choir, as she'd kind of assumed that would be a way of getting to know people. Four weeks of zero voice at the start of term wasn't the best way to find her feet musically!

mutterphore · 23/11/2021 10:33

@Goodbyestranger, I agree that maybe second years should get priority for tickets for formals as they missed out so much last year. Poor DS1 (C) managed to secure a ticket for his Christmas Formal but none of his friends were able to get one. Now he says he'll just have to sell his own ticket as he can't imagine just going and not being with a bunch of friends.

It feels very sad, as he's only done 2 formals overall - one belated Matric. formal and one the first ever subject formal - both this term this term.

DS2 and I are trying to encourage him to still go but he's not the sort who can easily mix with a group who are all friends together and he says at his college (unlike DS2's college at O), people don't just strike up conversations outside of their groups and he'd be sitting there for the whole meal probably not speaking to anyone at all.

@Flyingsquid, DS1 (C) got a place in his college choir but wasn't allowed to take it up as one of the weekly rehearsals clashed with a compulsory seminar. He'd also hoped to meet more people by joining choir but didn't happen. He then passed an audition for another college's choir but they didn't have any spaces left and said they'd be in touch if anyone dropped out, which they haven't. I suspect if he'd been brilliant, they might have made room but he's competent rather than brilliant as a singer. So he's missed out on the weekly formals that choir would have involved and all the Christmas carol concerts too.

@Lunarlandscape, 3 essays a week plus labwork sounds a huge workload for your DS! He's doing very well to keep on top of this and it must be lovely to know he's in love!

Does anyone know the exact start date/ travel back date for students at Cambridge for next term? DS1 seems to have no idea.

DahliaMacNamara · 23/11/2021 11:19

I imagine getting the old dears tickets for formals hasn't even entered DD's head. She only goes to formals herself if she absolutely has to. I'm still in two minds about whether I'd like to go. I'm not great at social events with strangers, but would love to see DD in that environment. Maybe just for five minutes, then go off with DH to get a curry. Don't suppose that's likely to be on the cards.

goodbyestranger · 23/11/2021 11:28

The formal thing isn’t a problem in the scheme of things but usually it would be pretty straightforward to get tickets for a few friends and this term it isn’t. It does make sense with extra numbers and last year disrupted to try to ration a bit, but probably not a big enough deal to move the people in charge.

Ironoaks · 23/11/2021 11:39

@mutterphore
Redeat date depends on college (DS has been given the window 11-17 January).
Full term starts on Tuesday 18 January.
Lectures start on Thursday 20 January.

pantjog · 23/11/2021 12:29

Ooh “redeat” is a new one for me. I love a bit of (pointless) Latin 😬

Malbecfan · 23/11/2021 13:35

@FlyingSquid, my DD didn't join a choir at all in her 1st year. She auditioned (late) for her own college. Her DoM said she had a good voice and is a competent reader so rang the college down the road and DD has sung there since mid-way through year 2. She gets formals there at least once per week, which she seems to enjoy. Don't panic about them not doing it in year 1.

Once they get used to managing their workload, they can look at other activities. My DD played in an orchestra as a fresher, probably because it's something she has done since she was at primary school. The one she joined wasn't very good, but DD's attitude was that she didn't have time to practice and wanted to be able to turn up & play the pieces. I went to a concert - our school orchestra was marginally better. She hasn't bothered playing her instruments at all in C since then and there are in the next door room to me right now, but in the holidays she has joined in family things, helped me at school and gone busking.

ofteninaspin · 23/11/2021 14:03

Formal tickets also hard to come by at DD's college; only two out of a group of six of DD's college friends were successful in getting tickets for next week. One of them had a quick chat with the Head of Catering and he came up with four more tickets and free bottles of wine. There are perks to being fourth years!

FlyingSquid · 23/11/2021 14:14

Thanks, Malbec and Mutterphore! She's an excellent singer but not the world's best sight reader - and of course getting more out of practice after two years of not doing it. Her college choir leader did say her voice was lovely and suggested trying the next college along (who are a bit less formal) but by then she had tonsillitis...

ErrolTheDragon · 23/11/2021 15:17

DD and her bestie (who is now a PG at a pg college) got a couple of alumnae formal tickets the other week, I think they're entitled to go to one each term. Apparently the food in their college is either very good or weirdly bad, they got the latter but still enjoyed it.

Unescorted · 23/11/2021 19:24

DD hasn't had any bother getting formal tickets. Ball tickets were fingers on buzzers.

Mutter thanks. She still sounds like a 60 a day girl but is feeling loads better.

Ginpostersyndrome · 24/11/2021 08:28

Did anyone else read this article?
www.varsity.co.uk/features/22360

Is this the case for every subject at Cambridge? (The ranking within cohort).

DahliaMacNamara · 24/11/2021 08:40

Jeez, that's archaic. What good does it achieve?

Flip

1 2 ··· 7 8 9 ··· 39 40