How much money to give DD a month at University?

[tactum]

I really do realise this is a very lucky position to be in that we can afford to think about it....

How much money will you give your kid a month at uni? Obv have basic loans in the bag, and we've said we'll make up the shortfall on the accommodation costs, but that basically leaves her with 0 living income. She's hopefully transferring to a job at uni that will earn her £30 per week.

I'm thinking give her £300 per month?? I'm not sure. I really do obviously realise we're fortunate to be able to give her this, and don't want to discourage her from getting job as I think that's important but just wondered what the general consensus was from people in the position to subsidise. Please don't flame me for being able to.....

I had £100 per week 20 years ago, I'm aware that that was quite a privileged position to be in, but any less now seems pretty difficult to manage on.

[quote brittleheadgirl]@LemonRoses
Random drug testing?!!
Ffs just when I think I've read it all on here!!![/quote]
His job.

Sorry didn’t finish, brittleheadgirl.

Recreational/illegal drugs are incompatible with his role. If he’s caught with drugs he loses his career. They test regard randomly.

[quote brittleheadgirl]@LemonRoses
Random drug testing?!!
Ffs just when I think I've read it all on here!!![/quote]
I doubt it's the parent doing random drug tests!

More likely his job or for a sport.

£300 sounds about right to me.

This is very much an individual family decision based on circumstances and finances.

Dd gets quite a substantial allowance each month but she's quite frugal and has saved consistently each month although I've been surprised at how costs can mount up for them with laundry fees each week and costs of joining a gym or clubs. I think a 100.00 a week is a good ballpoint figure if they are self catering. I certainly did not want my dd to think she could not have a nice coffee (at Costa etc) or she could not have a takeaway and to be honest if they have gone out I'd rather she got an uber or taxi back.

The fact that she's saving and values money, is not wasting food and cooking from stratch means we feel that we are getting things right.. She's also got a summer job too so developing a work ethic. I would not want her working during uni term time her course is too intense but we are fortunate to be able to support her and she's an only child.

We top up dds minimum loan to the maximum loan level. We started saving for that a few years before she started, so it's less painful. Her university ask them not to work in term time, but each summer she's had a good paid placement/internship. She's not a drinker and as a result she does absolutely fine money wise.

I am really grateful though that her masters is integrated, so it 'only' costs the same as her undergrad. Friends dc who are doing masters in London have frightening fees and accommodation costs.

Making minimum loan up to maximum loan level is a good plan. It is what my parents did when I went - when my minimum grant was about £300 a year and the full one about £1300. On random drug tests they are quite common in lots of sectors eg my older son works as a food delivery driver and they have tests all the time and clients whose scientists work in labs or in pharma companies for reasons of safety have regular tests too.

On reason I pay my children weekly (£150) is so they do not over spend, but my parents paid me for the term or even the whole year so I would learn to budget so I can understand both points of view.

Dd works in holidays (and on her gap year) both voluntary and paid to supplement her cv as well as boost her finances. Ds graduated a couple of years ago and struggled to get a job afterwards, partly due to covid, impressing on her the value of even temporary work for job applications. She also hopes to do a postgrad for which she will need relevant work experience and placements as places and funding are very competitive.

My DS is getting the minimum maintenance loan of £4,422 so I'm supposed to top this up by £5,066 per year. Is it best to give him £422 a month or £506 September to June on the assumption that he will be back home in July and August so he won't have halls of residence costs?

Also, how do you explain to your other children that they have to stop their activities because their big brother is going to university? I can't afford £4-500 a month for him and keep paying for music and swimming lessons for the other three children.

Also, how do you explain to your other children that they have to stop their activities because their big brother is going to university? I can't afford £4-500 a month for him and keep paying for music and swimming lessons for the other three children

Well, you have to make the choice and decide which is more important basically. There isn't any other way round it unfortunately.

My DS is getting the minimum maintenance loan of £4,422 so I'm supposed to top this up by £5,066 per year. Is it best to give him £422 a month or £506 September to June on the assumption that he will be back home in July and August so he won't have halls of residence costs?

I would say monthly as they're actually home a lot more than just July and August so will still need money.

Well, you have to make the choice and decide which is more important basically. There isn't any other way round it unfortunately.

I you don’t tell them that’s why, it would be extremely unfair to both the dc going to university and the others. If your dc is getting the minimum then you have more income than many others. Are you sure it has been calculated correctly ? How many children do you have if you spend £500 a month on music and swimming .

Yes it's been calculated correctly but I live in an area where house prices are ridiculously expensive so most of my income goes on my mortgage which is £2100 per month. I have three other children so between them it's two swimming lessons per week, two piano lessons per week and one drum lesson per week which costs £350 a month during term time. The only other area of the budget I can make cuts is in food shopping which isn't going to get me anywhere near enough the £422 per month needed to make up the shortfall in the maintenance loan.

StuntNun.. what will you do if/when they all want to go to uni?

Stuntnun, if you read through the thread,, you will see that students survive on less.

He should seek the cheapest accommodation he can. He should think about p/t jobs. He should practice cooking from scratch and leave with a week's worth of basic dishes. He should look at other ways to save money, eg is the coach cheaper than the train. You could discuss a budget with him, and pay him in smaller instalments.

DD has been bemused by the concept of property rich, cash poor. We too live in an area of high property prices. The family car is, by some way, scruffier than those owned by friends parents, we have always had cheap holidays, and she was used to us being careful with money. Yet by most measures we are richer.

The idea that if you are well off, you should display that wealth is a new one to her. We probably give her less than many of her friends, but it does not seem to bother her. She is lucky in that if she needed more she could ask. However she likes cooking, hates clothes shopping, does not drink much, is happy to walk or cycle, and doesn't much like clubbing. And a few odd things like being used to putting on a pullover rather than turning up the heating. Her friends tend to also be careful with money.

It depends on your son. But basically your family should not go without simply so he can have more beer money. If there is less money he will have to either earn some himself, or get used to living on less.

BeyondMyWits there are big gaps: four academic years between DS1 and DS2; six years between DS2 and DS3. There are only two years between DS3 and DS4 but hopefully by then I'll be financially better off. I only bought my home in 2018 and it took all of my savings and then some so I haven't very much put aside for DS1 for uni. DS3 is only 8 so I have a bit of time to make more preparations for him.

Thanks for the advice, Needmoresleep. The Money Saving Expert website made it sound like the £9,488 wasn't enough and they would need a job on top of that. My DS1 is a good cook and should be able to manage well on a budget. We already shop at Lidl so he is already used to eating from the cheaper options. He already works at the local pub so he has some experience and should be able to find work at uni. From what you've said I need to have another look at the maintenance loan and the cost of his accommodation and then work out a reasonable weekly budget for him. He will be living on campus and the university is near enough for me to be able to drive if he wants to come home at holidays. Maybe I'll look at making sure he has enough for food and other essentials and then if he wants money for takeaways or clothes then he'll have to earn that himself.

@StuntNun this is a genuine question - did you not know when your DC was born that university will cost you and therefore plan accordingly?

That wasn't a criticism but I would really like to know the answer.

this is a genuine question - did you not know when your DC was born that university will cost you and therefore plan accordingly?

I didn't know there was parental contribution. I thought a student loan was enough to pay rent and live off .

How naive was I?

Most people didn't because unlike the USA we were told university stage was free (other than only the minimum grant for the better off) and then Labour brought in student fees (the £1000 my daughters had to pay which are now £9250 a year by the time my twins went) - no time to plan or any notice. Had they said okay those having babies now in 18 years' time you will need to pay £X then parents could have started saving.

I make it up to the amount they would get if they got the full loan (she actually gets the minimum loan). I saw that as the expectation to be honest. It's presumably supposed to just cover living costs and I would say it is about right - it also roughly coincides with the guide amounts given by the university. She's working in the summer holidays (and hopefully in the future other holidays, but that was tricky this year) but not otherwise. She wouldn't have time and officially isn't allowed.

@Xenia since 2002 Uni wasn't free. Majority of DC going to Uni this year would be born after

Yes we didn't know exact amount but we knew we had to pay

So can't plan accurately but perhaps it shouldn't be a surprise at this stage

@MrsPelligrinoPetrichor I guess it would have been if DC getting full student loan? But if you do your due diligence you would have known how much your DC will get. Martin Lewis has been very public about this but I guess not everyone would follow

[quote chopc]@StuntNun this is a genuine question - did you not know when your DC was born that university will cost you and therefore plan accordingly? [/quote]
I didn’t know that the loan students could borrow to live off, was dependent on parental income, no.

DC says there are really three types of students in halls

-those whose parents earn loads and get loads of money each month. Many of those were at private school anyway and parents are probably used to paying out a fair whack each month. Parents will often pay the accommodation in one big whack, leaving the student their loan as their monthly spending money.

-those whose parents earn under the cut off and who can borrow the full loan. They have sufficient money to live off and if they have expensive tastes for clothes or cocktails, tend to get bar work to top this up.

-people like us. We earn bang on the cut off for the minimum loan so that’s all they can borrow, but we have other children-also at university-meaning topping up the loan can be a struggle. When they work-it’s often to pay for food, not fun, unlike the two other groups. We don’t have thousands sitting in the bank to use for accommodation, so the loan pays for the accommodation and we have to top this up, and them give £200 a month for living expenses. This is probably under half the spending money DC would get if we paid the accommodation and gave the student loan to live off.