UEA (2019) dealing with the unexpected and on to 2nd Year

[juicy0]

New thread for the parents of 2019 freshers. Thank you all for sticking around!
At the start of the year we never would have guessed the topics that are currently being discussed in this page but I'm grateful we still have each other to help navigate our way through this with our DC.
With the emptying of 1st year rooms seemingly on hold for many until the end of lockdown our thoughts will soon turn to 2nd year accommodation and whether term is likely to start as normal in September.

@sluj DD is also a geographer and she hadn't been doing much either until this week when she's been doing some statistics workshops.
I've aired the idea of her working on a local fruit farm to give her some income and structure but she's not keen 🙄

Ds has a chemistry exam tomorrow (he's studying biology) he told me it was a 24 hour exam. I thought he meant it was 24 hours long 😂 he tutted and said that means it's online for 24 hours from tomorrow morning.

@icanbewhatiwant back in the dark ages when I was at studying History at uni I had several units in my finals with 12 hour exams and one 48 hour exam - all open book, and not in an exam hall.

@GoldenRuby sounds fun! I didn't go to university so I have no idea about their exams, so ds tutted me when I thought it was 24 hours.

My DS thinks this is a gift from heaven!
In my day (before the dark ages), you got year 3 exams which covered years 2 and 3 and you were meant to remember stuff. I did English so it was hard to remember material from 2 years earlier when the syllabus covered 1 or 2 books per week , 2 plays and several poems. This was for each unit and there were 9 over the two years. Course work didn't count.
Still, it was better to be sat outside reading books for revision than stuck in the library with science books not to be removed!!
Happy days

@icanbewhatiwant thank you for mentioning about the chemistry exam. DS didn’t know anything about it 🤔😳
Unfortunately we’ve just found out he’s been depressed and is very behind on work, not sure if he will fail the year or not.

Not good news, but hopefully we/he will work something out. I had feared things were going badly as he kept going off the radar when I was in Canada, but he’s only just opened up about what a mess he’s in, poor boy.

@Itscoldouthere sorry to hear that all is not well. Hopefully you've got time to have a good talk and get to the bottom of the issue x

@Itscoldouthere that's not great news is it. But at least with the current situation it has meant you are in this country to support him. I hope you can get it sorted out.
Ds hadn't finished the exam when he came down for a break. He said it was a lab report. I think he's been in a chat with some lads from his course. He went back up to continue with it.

Thanks guys, it’s worrying, don’t really know the extent of it yet as he only opened up yesterday, trying not to push him too hard yet as he struggled to talk about stuff (he’s got Asperger) I’m just hoping something can be sorted as god know what will happen if he drops out/gets kicked out of UEA

@Itscoldouthere I am really sorry to hear about your DS2 BUT it is good that he can confide in you and that he has been able to open up about how he feels. It is possibly being away from UEA and having time to reflect that has allowed him the space and confidence to do that. It's quite an achievement and a testament to your family relationship that he has been able to do so.

I really hope that he manages to work through his struggles. We have a family friend whose DS started at Edinburgh and failed his first year (not that I'm suggesting your DS will do so) BUT he got the opportunity to re do it and was a lot more confident second time around. I think there is this huge spin around enjoying university but some people just don't. It might be that he's not doing the right course, isn't at the right uni, hasn't met the right friends...I think it can sometimes be down to pure luck as to how young people adapt.... Did he get much support from student welfare or hadn't he got that far - he still could presumably?

Thanks @NewModelArmyMeyhem18 it’s tricky to know what will happen, he likes UEA, likes his flatmates but just seems to have switched off from his course.
We’re not sure if it is because he was depressed or if he just doesn’t like Biology. He doesn’t really know either.
The only other course he would have been interested in is Military History, but unfortunately he didn’t take A level history (he did take it at GCSE). He will look at History at UEA as they also have a foundation but I feel general history will be too wide for him.
I do fear he will fail this year as he’s not handed in 3 times (although he’s not had any contact from tutors 🤔) so it may be they won’t want him anymore 😢

@Itscoldouthere my ds really dislikes his tutor and the tutors attitude, the tutor makes no comment on their work, he moans at the work the tutor sets but likes the work the lecturers set. I guess there's a lot he can do about that. So it sounds like your ds might not been keen on his either and is lacking in contact too. I wonder if they have the same tutor.

@icanbewhatiwant yes, I’m a bit surprised at lack of contact. I can’t believe that DS has missed 3 hand ins and lots of lectures and nobody has said anything? But maybe that’s me being nieve about how university works ( I went to an art college which was very hands on, full time contact).
It sounds like DS doesn’t have any personal relationships with any of the tutors/lecturers.
He did speak to student services about problems with not sleeping, but they weren’t very helpful.
He is meant to have some type of mentor based on his DSA assessment but he’s never been able to access it ( but it is probably the case that he didn’t try very hard).
I don’t know what’s going to happen, we plan to sit down with him this weekend and get him to write to his group tutor to try and find out how far behind he is and if he can salvage the year or not and take it from there.

Perhaps he needs a different personal tutor? I would be surprised if they didn't follow up non-receipt of three pieces of work but if it happened when they were on strike maybe it slipped being noticed (not that that is an excuse). I would have expected it to be raised from both sides (tutor and your DS) so something has clearly gone wrong. It is worrying though because it does make one see how students can fall through the system and their struggles just not be properly registered....

Again the mentor is there to provide support and given that some students do struggle should be chasing contact with your DS if he didn't contact them.... If you're feeling low it can sometimes be a monumental thing to pluck up the courage/energy to actually ask for support, can't it?

Good that you are going to send some time with him this weekend working out a plan of action. And hopefully he can sort something out.

On the subject of him preferring military history to the subject he is currently studying that is more of an issue. Are there any under-graduate degrees elsewhere that are very military history oriented? If he really has a passion for it perhaps he needs to study for an A Level in it and reapply to uni? Although, out of interest why didn't he opt to study for the A Level in the subject in the first place if he has a passion for it?

All I would say is that he does at least currently have a bit of time and space to consider his options. DSis failed her first year at uni (and no one at the family end had a clue) - she was chucked out. She then spent a couple of years redoing A Levels and doing voluntary/low-paid jobs before re-accessing higher education. It all worked out well in the end BUT how different her life might have been had she just owned up to struggling and got the support when she first needed it.

@NewModelArmyMayhem18 thanks for the support. I’m surprised that no contact has been made with him about the non submission of work. It’s so hard, we’d like to send an email to query this but know that it’s not the done thing for parents to email and I don’t think it would go down very well.

Re him not taking History, he didn’t like the syllabus for A level History, he had a GCSE A in Geography and History, he ended up taking Geography, Maths, Bio and Chem at A level. He then developed a real interest in Military History over his A level years, but it was more of a hobby.
Unfortunately despite getting an A in Geography A level he never wanted to study it further.

Our main problem if he gets chucked out/leaves is he’d have to come to Canada with us (as we won’t have a UK home) and he won’t be able to work as he won’t be eligible for a working visa.
🤦‍♀️

@Itscoldouthere my ds says he has submitted work to his own tutor and it gets marked much lower than other pieces marked by the lecturer. He says there's never any feedback as to why it's marked low. I have told him to ask why and he said he did ask once and the person didn't really reply. So he's not happy at having to keep the same tutor. I am wondering if it's the same one your son has.

I hope you can get it sorted. There's not much of this year school left really. It's gone so quickly. Can he study in Canada if you take him back with you?

@icanbewhatiwant I’ll have to question him more on his tutor, I’ve not asked much for the last few days as once he’d opened up he retreated to his room as I think he was worried that we would be pestering him, asking questions all the time.
I knew something was wrong, he was just being weird and when I was in Canada he kept going off radar not answering calls/emails, so my gut instinct said something was off, he did say he was having trouble sleeping.
I had been gently probing since he came home, but he obviously didn’t want to admit to what was happening.
I don’t know if he could study in Canada, the system is so different and we have the added problem of being in Quebec so in most education, French is primary language. The English speaking university in Montreal is really hard to get in to, so I doubt he’d have good enough grades, but I haven’t even looked at that option. We’d have to speak to DH company to see if they would support him getting in to the country, luckily you are now classed as a dependant till 22 ( it used to be 19) but him coming to Canada full time wouldn’t be anyone first choice.

Hmm it sounds as if the tutor is not good....

BTW friend whose son is at Edinburgh did get involved and it really helped to sort things out for her DS. As long as your DS is on board with you doing so I'm not sure it's an issue. If a young person is experiencing problems it is wrong to always expect them to cope on their own - sometimes that's the straw that broke the camel's back ;-(

I don't suppose there are any joint honours history/biology course he could swap onto at UEA.

TBQH I would have thought that universities would be bending over backwards to keep their students at the moment, so they may be more flexible than one might initially think. He clearly has an aptitude for humanities if he got an A in his A Level geography (and an A in GCSE history).

is it always wrong even....

@Itscoldouthere I think it's hard to tell whether there are any problems with boys anyway. Mine doesn't answer calls or texts. I was worried. But that's just him ignoring me. So it's understandable you didn't pick it up...even if you thought there was a problem. But it's good he's opened up now.

Does anyone know if there be less exams than there would normally be? They said on tv that universities will cancel exams. But a friends son still has several in May. I haven't asked ds if he has more. I assumed there wouldn't be as in theory they could look up answers or get help. It may be an advantage for your son if there aren't more. But then again if he really doesn't want to carry on with biology maybe it's best to look into other options.

@icanbewhatiwant you're right about boys and girls tend to be the polar opposite (well certainly the case in our family!).

I have kind of lost track of what DS has to go re exams - think open book ones. He still has some course work to do for this term and not sure about when the exams start - weren't they scheduled for late May to mid June? I would imagine that will be when they're happening if indeed they are.

DS has just paid his Yr 2 house deposit without checking with his friends that they're still on board (even though I told him to do so....).

Ds says he has no more exams.

He's also been asked to pay £280 for this term of accommodation. I think it's a one off payment. Anyone else had this?

@icanbewhatiwant what accommodation is your DS in? I'm not sure that DS has been asked to....

He was in Paston house. It is on their webpage. Envision? I can't think what the page is called that they go on for payments, lectures etc. But it's on there saying accommodation payment outstanding. One of his flatmates queried it and was told they all had to pay it.

So is that an external provider @icanbewhatiwant? I guess it's a compromise? Maybe that's how much the rooms actually cost the company per term to run????