Going to university (2019/20 academic year) - and the fledgling freshers are off!

[NewModelArmyMayhem18]

Previous thread

I don't understand the book slots,is that just to pi k up the keys or is that the time we have to drop off? We have 11-11.30 but surely we don't juts have half an hour to unload the car and be off?

I am pretty sure you do!

After having waited for DH, the site has now crashed....

@MrsPellegrinoPetrichor think so yes. Bath has 2 hour slots but I’ve seen others mention 30 minutes for some unis.

I think the idea is you dump your stuff out (they often have helpers and trolleys to make that quicker) - then you can move your car and come back?

The deed is done and we dropped DS off at Edinburgh yesterday. Mixed emotions as we left him; he just doesn’t seem old enough - and he’s very quiet so tbh is dreading Freshers but looking forward to the start of the course, and societies fairs/meet-ups. He was the only one to have arrived in his flat when we left him.... Evening WhatsApp conversation showed he had gone to the building meet-up but was then back watching Netflix ... just really hoping he meets some like minded souls over the next few days. It feels we’ve pushed him out of the nest too early (!)

I know it is not fashionable on many parts of MN, but I am starting to get very teary and not being able to book the arrival slot is not helping.

Just a question after a few posts on here and experiences on Facebook, does anyone have a DH who is equally or more involved?

DH's sole packing input was to tell DS he assumed he was taking golf clubs - which won't fit in the car am assuming he thinks he can take out all his clothes and the clothes horse

@Gettingthroughtheweek I hope he soon settles and finds some good friends. My ds is struggling with the Facebook chat for his flat, it is mostly girls talking about clothes and love island. Neither of which is of any interest to him. So I hope he finds some people he gets on with. He is fairly quiet too.

No-one seems to be responding to the FB chat for DD's flat. I hope she won't be sharing with a load of ghosts.

That could be because the youth of today don't do Facebook perhaps gin?

My DS will have to join Facebook if he wants to get on to the WhatsApp group.

@Ginfordinner for ghosts read boys who aren't just aren't that socially aware to be chatting to strangers! DS just doesn't use FB, so has no understanding as to why he would suddenly start doing so for the sake of 'lame' chat (his words, not mine!). His feeling is that he will meet his flatmates soon enough anyway. Talk of clothes and Love Island would probably just make him roll his eyes and leave the conversation anyway...

Have you managed to sort out your drop-off/arrival slot yet @Piggywaspushed? Hope so.

BTW DS is the type who will plan his whole life around sport that he wants to watch. It has become super annoying, more noticeable too over the long summer off some of them have enjoyed.

@Gettingthroughtheweek hope you are okay? Did anyone else arrive (hoping your DS didn't have to spend his first night in halls in a flat on his own???). Sure today will bring new flatmates and more opportunities for bonding.

I know it's small consolation, but remember our 18/19/20/21 year olds are older than their Scottish peers who start university (if they stay in Scotland) at 17...

@Peggywaspushed I am a DH if it helps. I’ve probably been more involved than DW :D

I think the idea is you dump your stuff out (they often have helpers and trolleys to make that quicker) - then you can move your car and come back?

That makes more sense,thank you. I just know of we leave Ds to it,he'll sleep on a bare mattress the whole term and just dump everything in the corner

I KNOW he needs to get on with it but I want to make his bead and then I'll go

Ds had to join FB to get on to halls groups ,the yoof of today seem to do snap chat more than FB.

45Gettingthroughtheweek I am fully prepared for mixed emotions too. My Ds is pretty sociable but I can imagine him needing a quiet first night with Netflix to take stock of everything.

Piggy, how annoying! Luckily for us, UEA doesn't seem to have slots (or maybe they do, but they haven't told us yet). Just need to be there between 10am and 5pm on Saturday. We are aiming for early, as we're off to Spain at 5.30am on Sunday, and no doubt I won't have given a moment's thought to my own packing/departure.

Aww, Gettingthroughtheweek - must be a strange feeling. Poor little fledgling; I'm sure he'll be fine.

Progress made on student bank account - she didn't need to go into branch, even though it was a new bank for her (Santander). Docs submitted online, debit card and account details have all arrived, SF informed, so we're good to go.

I started uni at 17. It was a campus uni do perhaps easier than some others. I was a fairly independent 17 year old, though.

I haven't got it sorted yet, no newmodel. Luckily, I did supermarket yesterday so can just sit at the laptop pressing F5 but tomorrow this will not be remotely possible.

MrKlaw are you the exception that proves the rule !?

Gin Dd is the same! She set up a Facebook group but at least she’s found 3 boys and one girl. One boy is the only one actively communicating with her though. Methinks the missing three could be 3 other boys. Doubt any of the rooms will be empty - their accommodation appears to be the most highly sort after.

@NewModelArmyMayhem18 Thanks - yes, two have now arrived, both international. One ‘seems nice’ which is high praise so fingers crossed. I think they stagger arrival so hopefully the other two arrive today. And course meetings start tomorrow I think so hopefully it will be more purposeful after today. (Well he has a task - but more jumpers because he hasn’t got enough cold weather clothes for Edinburgh l!)
@Piggywaspushed - we’re already missing him as the family dynamic has changed. I think it would be very odd if we didn’t! It’s great to have WhatsApp and FaceTime though. I remember queueing for the phones once a week and then having one brief conversation. Fine for me then; not sure how my parents felt!
@MrsPellegrinoPetrichor I do think DS are less ready than girls. My DD was practically pushing us out idc the sort when we dropped her off for the first time a few years ago ...

Good luck to everyone still packing and choosing kit. I’m glad we chose grey because the flat colour scheme is violent green and orange ....,

@Piggywaspushed maybe! We’ve just done a dry run seeing what boxes we can fit in the car. Got a couple of sturdy fruit boxes from work along with IKEA bags which all fit well and then any overspill can go on the back seat as long as it’s soft

Now I’m printing off our uni list and we’re packing some simple stuff (everything except clothes and final food shop which will be next weekend probably)

DHs involvement consisted of driving and giving lectures about drinking too fast and wearing condoms....

DS2 wasn't involved in any groups beforehand, the only English student in their flat is 19 and the rest have either only just turned 18 or are still 17. In theory you could be at uni in Scotland at 16!

His flat seem to have made a no party/pre 's or after pact. Lots going on in the blocks and they are all socialising seperately or together but they don't want the mess or hassle of hosting!

He's done his first lot of laundry and is eating more regularly he says and they seem to have agreed to share basics such as milk and bread and butter and salt and pepper etc.

I don't think they are all best friends or anything, but they seem to be getting along ok and have a similar outlook. Hope that continues. They didn't do any questionnaires of interests or anything so I think they've been lucky. DS2 looks more like a party animal than he is (long hair, band t shirts, leather jacket, dressed in black). He doesn't do Facebook very much either but I've noticed he's acquired some new friends, all female.

My DH has no input really. He's a farmer and a bit anti university. He thinks the debt isn't good and that they should get to work and be earning money. He wasn't even keen on ds staying on for 6th form, dh has an older daughter who went to university. She took a year off to travel too...dh wasn't impressed with that. He's a typical farmer who won't take holidays or leave the country and doesn't understand why anyone would want to travel.
He was proud of his dd though. I'm sure he is of our ds too.
I'll be the one topping up accommodation fees etc. I'll be the one dropping ds off. Well...dh probably would come but he's staying home with our youngest.

DD has now been added to a FB group. Apparently she received a message in the other messages. She thinks she will have very little in common with most of the students. All but one of them have bought the non SU wristband because they like house/techno "music" and clubbing. DD likes proper music indie bands and bars rather than clubs.

The SU wristband has loads of daytime activities that DD is interested in, whereas the others aren't interested in doing anything during the day.

Mine is typical , I guess, in that he shows no interest but then gets involved in picking holes in plans and expenditure after it's sorted!

He did go to uni (through clearing) but hasn't really wrapped his head round how much has changed.

DH hasn't taken much interest. When he went to university he didn't go to any open days. He just packed a couple of cases and off he went. I don't think freshers week was as big as it is now.

I think the whole going to uni thing has changed beyond all recognition since the last century (gosh, doesn't that make one sound old???). Agree that there wasn't much more to it than packing a couple of very large suitcases and going on one's way. Even opening a bank account was about a ten minute exercise in-branch. None of this multi-layered online approach to registration which seems to make it much more complicated than it should be.

Neither DH or I went to uni from school. DH now has 2 degrees, one ou and the other nursing so not standard uni and I went to college day release from work to somewhere that is now a uni.

We had no clue really, Ds1 stayed at home and didn't do any freshers stuff, DS2 didn't have a band thing as I don't think any of knew they existed.

The whole bank rigmarole now is financial protection, money laundering regulation, data protection and ID, fraud prevention etc. Its a pain for the almost 100%of people who just want to manage their own money but its the way of the world that we always need to legislate for the minority.

Yes, you're right about the whole issue with setting up a bank account having become so much more complicated over the years (and particularly within the past 10!).