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Higher education

Talk to other parents whose children are preparing for university on our Higher Education forum.

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Original poster

Anyone still waiting to hear from Durham?

807 replies

PortusCale · 11/02/2019 11:11

Just wondered if anyone else is waiting to hear from Durham for an offer for 2019 entry?

See that offer holder day bookings are now open and I understand college allocation has begun.

DS still waiting here, DS application went through in November.....does this mean a rejection will likely be on its way?

OP posts:

CBear99 · 22/03/2019 13:43

Portuscale I'm not sure what she'll do but I think she'll keep her options open until August when she gets her results then decide. She has some good ideas for a gap year if she does decide to take a gap year.
Dressed 'to the manor born' wow how out of date and judgemental is that!? I don't know any teenagers who dress up these days wherever they come from. My DS at uni already lives in trackies ( they all do) and his idea of dressing up is scruffy jeans. My DS also wears scruffy black skinny jeans and t shirts or hoodies. Doesn't usually bother with the pearls and tiara

GCAcademic · 22/03/2019 14:05

GCAcademic" I don't think there's been lack of understanding - frustration maybe at the lengthy process but not a lack of understanding. Maybe if things were more transparent that might help.

And why should it matter what somebody wears - track suit bottoms or otherwise? You say you are keen to recruit students who do not appear as if to the manor born. What do you mean by that exactly?

I think my quotation was out of context, so may not have been clear - I quoted from another poster who expressed concern at the lack of understanding being demonstrated towards a would-be applicant turning up in tracksuit bottoms. I meant to indicate that I don't care what people wear to open days or interviews.

GCAcademic: with respect, students may opt for jeans over trackies out of mild concern for what their peers might think in terms of 'Is someone here trying to make a statement?' I don't think they'd give a rat's wotsit about admissions staff or tutors! I think you miss the point.

You're quite right, I don't understand your point at all. At least not in terms of how it relates to the case of the parent above concerned about how her trackie-wearing DC might appear. Again, jeans, tracksuit, wear what you want. It makes no difference to me.

CBear - I didn't say "dressed" to the manor born, I said "appear". There's a crucial difference.

Original poster

PortusCale · 22/03/2019 14:11

You said you’re keen to recruit students who do not appear as if tontne manor born. Please can you elaborate on this as I don’t think it should matter what a student chooses to wear although I am clearly wrong if your comment is anything to go by!

Are you on the Durham academic staff?

OP posts:

CBear99 · 22/03/2019 14:13

GCacademic - semantics - you haven't exactly answered Portuscale's question have you? So what exactly did you mean and what is the 'crucial difference'? Appearance includes how you dress surely? Or are you inferring something else?

MariaNovella · 22/03/2019 14:15

No DC of ours would go to an open day or other event where they were hoping to make a good impression in an institutional setting wearing trackies. They would think that anyone doing so was a making a statement.

ZandathePanda · 22/03/2019 14:16

You're quite right, I don't understand your point at all.

GCAcademic · 22/03/2019 14:19

Re. "to the manor born", I wasn't talking about clothing, but about the kind of attitude someone upthread mentioned, where the family barged an applicant out of the way. That kind of entitlement sits very badly with academics in general. Another OP was concerned that her son would come across badly for wearing a track suit. My point is that I wouldn't notice that, but would notice an entitled attitude. Of course, it is perfectly possible that her son might have both a track suit and an entitled attitude I suppose . . .

And, no, I don't work at Durham.

Original poster

PortusCale · 22/03/2019 14:20

I would agree but it would seem that judgement is being made by staff for choice of dress despite saying otherwise.

What is wrong if someone wants to dress smartly? We are not all the same and just as some feel comfortable in track suits others don’t. Why does it have to be such an issue?!

OP posts:

Justanothermile · 22/03/2019 14:22

What statement do trackies make?

goodbyestranger · 22/03/2019 14:23

I can't help you further then GCAcademic other than to say you may well not understand the 18 yr old psyche that well. The point I made about trackies was about peer group perception, not admissions staff or tutor perception. I can't really make it much clearer - essentially these trackies weren't about you :)

Original poster

PortusCale · 22/03/2019 14:24

Well now you’ve clarified that I suppose it explains your attitude. But the inference of your words implied appearance.

And just as you could have someone in a tracksuit with an entitled attitude you could also have someone in a suit with tne exact opposite attitude. You know the expression don’t judge a book by its cover.....

OP posts:

Bowchicawowow · 22/03/2019 14:24

Your DC sound vile Maria.

I suppose though if an old Etonian turned up wearing a trackie that may be because he wants to make a statement. I can state categorically though (asI have already done) that my DS and his friend would wear them because they think that's what everybody their age wears. Actually, that's not entirely true because as I said earlier when we walked around a (very good) university recently DS did comment to me that he was 'the only person wearing a trackie' so he did realise this isn't normal for everyone.

GCAcademic · 22/03/2019 14:25

What is wrong if someone wants to dress smartly?

Did I say that anything was wrong with dressing smartly?

Wear what on earth you want. I only got involved in this thread because there was someone telling a poster that her son would be seen in a certain way for wearing a tracksuit. I wanted to reassure her that it wouldn't bother me in the slightest. Equally, he could turn up in a cravat and that would be absolutely fine. We only care about your aptitude for the subject.

Original poster

PortusCale · 22/03/2019 14:25

Sorry, but why on earth do her children sound vile? You sound seriously unhinges!

OP posts:

Original poster

PortusCale · 22/03/2019 14:28

unhinged

OP posts:

Bowchicawowow · 22/03/2019 14:30

Portus Because they judge other people on what they are wearing.

I don't think I am unhinged and couldn't care less that you do.

Original poster

PortusCale · 22/03/2019 14:32

*GCAcademic" - no you didn't say there was anything wrong with dressing smartly but you said that you are keen to recruit students who do not appear as if to the manor born. Surely you can see a connection there? It's all very well to turn around now and say you were referring to attitude but you weren't very clear.

And that poster wasn't saying that her son would be seen in a certain way for wearing a tracksuit - I think you need to re-read the relevant posts.

OP posts:

Original poster

PortusCale · 22/03/2019 14:34

I think it's you Bowchicawow who judges people on what they wear!

OP posts:

goodbyestranger · 22/03/2019 14:34

Goodness GCAcademic I really do hope that you don't teach either English or Law. I was incredibly clear - no need for close reading!

Bowchicawowow · 22/03/2019 14:39

Really Portus Nowhere have I said anything like that!

GCAcademic · 22/03/2019 14:40

It's all very well to turn around now and say you were referring to attitude but you weren't very clear.

In that case, I apologise for the lack of clarity. I am on my lunchbreak and skimmed the thread very quickly and also replied quickly as I was concerned by the person worrying about how her son would appear. I think I'll leave it now, partly as I need to get on with some work, but also since it seems you'd like people to respond to your thread in a certain way.

Original poster

PortusCale · 22/03/2019 14:43

Bowchicawowow here you go:

On the subject of open days I am taking ds and his friend down to one soon and it's fair to say I am worried for them. I can't imagine how they will feel walking around in their usual attire of trackies when they are surrounded by the human equivalent of Louis Vuitton handbags.

OP posts:

CBear99 · 22/03/2019 14:45

Bowchicawowow can I reassure you that your DC will not look out of place in trackies- my DS is in his 2nd year at a RG uni and they ALL wear trackies - nobody cares and nobody thinks anything of it - student or academic. It is their 'uniform' in a way and so long as they feel comfortable that is all that matters. If some want to smarten up to (usually grubby) jeans when they go out that is also their choice.

goodbyestranger · 22/03/2019 14:47

Or maybe just read the posts GCAcademic?

Freedobby · 22/03/2019 15:00

The "lack of understanding" comment was from me and didn't relate to the wearing of trackies. It was more a general comment in response to what I have read on various forums when doing uni research, not just on MN, where it came across that some applicants or parents couldn't seem to understand why, if the student got the top grades at GCSE, how could another student receive an offer ahead of them. It was more in relation to admissions looking at the whole picture of an application.

I do think the length of time taken by some unis (obviously Durham being the main culprit here) is unacceptable however the applications are reviewed and they are not being fair to the students at what is a stressful enough time for them. I will certainly bear this in mind if my DC looks at Durham next year (it's on the shortlist !)

Fingers crossed for some positive news for you all soon.

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