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Higher education

Talk to other parents whose children are preparing for university on our Higher Education forum.

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Original poster

Worried about DS's first choice uni -WWYD?

145 replies

IsThisForReal · 12/12/2017 10:11

DS didn't get his first choice (Oxbridge), but he has four other offers though. Three are at well-known, well respected universities. Two of them consistently rank in the top 4-6 across all the league tables for his subject. The third is typically about 10/11.
His fourth offer ( uni Z) is usually somewhere between 12 to 25 in the rankings. It has a good reputation for his subject, in fact that department is something of a flagship for the University. DS spent a week on a course there over the summer and had a good time.
Since then they have been bombarding him with marketing materials saying how much they hope he will join them next year.
Now he is saying he thinks this will be his first choice, but DH and I are concerned that he is not making a rational, informed decision but is being influenced by the fact he has spent time there and "knows " it.

I know league tables aren't the most important thing, but I can't help feeling that DS can do better than this university. The typical grades achieved by people who start the course are much lower than his predictions – think ABB rather than AAAA. Uni Z has a reputation for accepting grades several grades lower than their offer. I'm worried that he will be bored or not find the course challenging enough, or not find like minded individuals.
Unfortunately he is being quite arsey about it though, and DH and I don't want to back him into a situation where he chooses this university to 'spite us'.
Of course his decision is important, but we want him to make it based on good, rational reasons not just a gut feel from a holiday placement.
We still have some offer holders days to go to, but DS has already dismissed one of these unis as being 'too cold and wet'.

WWYD?

OP posts:

catwoozle · 13/12/2017 06:07

Re employers a lot of big corps are doing blind application screening now so university choice can be irrelevant

Yes, and I think a lot more of the ones who are.

HRTpatch · 13/12/2017 06:10

Ds is at one of the top RG universities and loathes it.

ReigateMum · 13/12/2017 06:25

DD is at one of the top RG universities and loves it.

JohnHunter · 13/12/2017 08:23

Sometimes it's no bad thing to be the "favourite" student and top of the class in a lesser-ranked institution, particularly if the university is already investing in your DS' subject. If he works hard and makes the most of the opportunities available, he might well end up in a better place overall than coasting along in the middle of a cohort somewhere else. Yes - he should think about it carefully - but I would leave the decision to him.

TammySwansonTwo · 13/12/2017 10:01

I also think it depends on really how much difference there is between the universities in question. I mentioned earlier that I chose a uni that was slightly behind then other in terms of league tables, but they were both RG universities.

Then of course it depends on the reputation of the department - if you want to study computer animation or similar, Arts Institute Bournemouth is one of the most respected courses in the country even if it's not high up the tables, and going there will give you an edge when it comes to applying for jobs (given many in the industry studied there themselves and the overall reputation). I'd be looking at employment stats for the courses in his chosen field, if such stats exist.

TammySwansonTwo · 13/12/2017 10:01

Agreed John

ragged · 13/12/2017 10:18

Come on, @IsThisForReal, throw us one reward bone before you abandon the thread. Tell us what course & which uni is Uni Z. Pretty Please??

Ta1kinPeace · 13/12/2017 17:35

I reckon its because he cannot choose between Chantry and Hamwic halls

senua · 14/12/2017 00:01

I was going to suggest something along the lines of the Spanish restaurant analogy.
(a) He should be cautious of why Uni Z is bombarding him with marketing material, if they are that good then they shouldn't need to be begging students to join them.
(b) He has the additional insight that he has seen the Oxbridge process so he knows how a confident University operates.

Can you get into an innocuous conversation where you compare the process for Oxbridge and Uni Z and let him work out for himself points (a) and (b) above.
Also, mention it in passing and then let it drop. You know how men tend to suddenly come out with bright ideas about a week after you first told them.
Call his bluff and take him seriously. Tell the rest of the family over Christmas about his 'brave' decision. DS sometimes talks about harebrained schemes like this just to wind me up but I have learned to josh him back.

SunshineTheMonkey · 14/12/2017 21:42

Unless you name it it's hard to be objective.

Yes some will say oh it's great and others won't but at least posters on here are knowledgable and honest

jeanne16 · 15/12/2017 09:39

If your son wants to have any chance of getting onto a graduate scheme, he needs to go to the uni with the best reputation that he can get into. He also needs the best possible A level grades. The jobs market is incredibly tough. It is frankly untrue to say that the university doesn’t matter.

titchy · 15/12/2017 11:24

It is frankly untrue to say that the university doesn’t matter

Depends on the subject. Teaching, nursing, engineering etc - doesn't matter at all. That sort of sweeping generalisation is unhelpful.

Abra1d · 15/12/2017 15:22

So someone doing Mechanical Engineering at Imperial College with AAA* is at no advantage?

Abra1d · 15/12/2017 15:22

Sorry. Meant to type 3 A stars.

Ta1kinPeace · 15/12/2017 18:04

Call his bluff and take him seriously. Tell the rest of the family over Christmas about his 'brave' decision. DS sometimes talks about harebrained schemes like this just to wind me up but I have learned to josh him back.
Rock solid advice there ....

pallisers · 15/12/2017 21:20

Teaching, nursing, engineering etc - doesn't matter at all.

This is also a sweeping generalisation. And maybe that is true in the UK but in the US if your engineering degree comes from MIT or Caltec or Stanford it is valued very differently than if it is from, say, the University of Alabama.

goodbyestranger · 15/12/2017 21:30

It's a sweeping generalization in the UK too, certainly as regards teaching - I don't know about nursing or engineering.

scaryteacher · 16/12/2017 13:08

Ds got 3Bs at A level and got into his first choice where his offer was AAB. He graduated with a First last year, and is now back there doing an MA.

We went to see four places, but he was very clear that where he went was the course that he wanted. The campus is lovely, which he also enjoys, and he has been very happy. As we have funded it, we could have insisted he went elsewhere, but he has loved his time there, and he wouldn't have achieved a First if he had been unhappy, or so engaged in the course.

Dancingdreamer · 17/12/2017 00:59

I haven't read the whole thread so I am not sure if anyone has mentioned this. Have you considered that not getting Oxbridge has knocked your DC's confidence? Maybe your DC is now choosing a university which they see as a safe option where there is less competition and they feel they can shine?

mumeeee · 18/12/2017 12:57

You can advise him but other than that you should let him make his own decision and let him go to the university new wants too.
I know a young person who was pushed by her parents to go to a university they thought she should go to and not the one she wanted too. The result was she ended up being very miserable and dropped out in her 2nd year

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