OMFG!!!!!
I've been in touch with my real dad, after having hardly any contact for 3.5y - the odd phone call every few months. Some of you will remember the background to all this.
After having some contact with my lovely, supportive, honest step-mother, I've been texting him and he's been ignoring some and responding to others. Last week I texted him asking him outright why he was ignoring me - if it was because he was scared? Or because I was irritating?. He texted back and said he was just really busy and apologised. Since then he's sent about three texts off his own back - just friendly keeping in touch type texts. Just what I wanted.
I spent a lot of time and energy making him and my step-mum a present and a card and posted it today, and then, on an impulse, texted him and asked him if we'd be able to meet up over Christmas. He texted back and said he had no money for fuel so couldn't unless I could drive there. I didn't realise how devastated I was until three hours ago when DH said something that mildly upset me, but which really opened the flood gates. I cried for ages on my own in our room, wrote my dad loads of notes telling him what a shitty fucker he is. Then I felt a really strong urge to ring him and yell at him.
I texted him and asked him if it was a good time to call, thinking that either he'd say it was ok or he'd say it wasn't and that I'd decide what to say to him when I spoke to him.
I came downstairs and cried all over my sewing (which I'll tell Lizzie and Stretch about in a bit, after I've eaten!), and then my dad rang!!!
I decided that I didn't need to yell at him, or even tell him how I felt. It was just a step in the right direction to be in touch with him. I expected no less than the 'no we can't meet' response to my earlier text, so just had to get over the hurt and it would be fine. After a few minutes of non-descript chatting, he suddenly said that he had a business meeting somewhere near us on Wednesday and he could come after that! . I really am in shock about it, and delighted.
He said he had been very depressed over the last 15m, which we thought might be the case, and that we'd both got into a rut of not being in touch and needed me nudging him to get things moving again. I think he was scared, but speaking to me and me not yelling made him brave enough to try to meet up.
I was upset because I thought, if you have no money, if something is really important, then you find a way and he wasn't. But now he has done.
I hope I'm not tense until Wednesday now! It's DD3's birthday on Sunday, so I really don't want to spoil it by being on edge. I'll need you all to keep me sane, whenever I can get on here!