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Original poster

My pregnant friend has just had a skiing accident...

167 replies

pavlovthecat · 07/03/2009 18:55

I am furious with her and her DP. Well, I am now I know she and baby are ok.

She has fractured her leg, skiiing in USA, while 16 weeks pg.

She has never been skiing before, thought it would be a good time to try, seeing her dp insisted she would be fine (apparantly gp said it was ok). And now she is likely to be in USA for a few weeks before she can fly home.

How could she put herself and her unborn child in danger like that?

I did not put this in AIBU, because to be honest, I don't think I am. I feel very cross.

OP posts:
Highlander · 08/03/2009 11:19

I got the go-ahead to ski at 16 weeks from my OB and GP. Her uterus is barely out of the pelvis, so there is unlikely to be any abdominal trauma. I was warned to take it easy, on account of relaxed ligaments.

Over-eating, smoking, lack of exercise and other poor lifestyle choices are more likely to harm the foetus. The UK seems very backward about this.

LucyEllensmummy · 08/03/2009 11:32

Highlander - that is interesting, but surely there must be a risk if you have a bad fall? The same with horse riding? Genuine question

dragonbutter · 08/03/2009 11:52

i think the advice in the US is that if you normally do lots of exercise or a particular activity it's ok to carry on in pregnancy as long as you don't increase the intensity and just carry on at the level you were pre-pregnancy.

i thought the advice in the uk was the same.

so pav's friend ahs followed the official advice and broken her leg.
she hasn't hurt the baby. it's just a bit inconvenient.
it was obviously a risk she was willing to take. but it is her choice isn't it, and hasn't really done anything wrong. ( although it wouldn't have been my choice)
will be interesting to see if her opinions have changed now though.

dragonbutter · 08/03/2009 11:53

but taking up a new activity is different isn't it.
ah well. baby is fine. that's what matters isn't it?

expatinscotland · 08/03/2009 12:06

Believe you me, this poor gal will pay for trying to take up skiing whilst 16 weeks pregnant!

Unfortunately, possibly for the rest of her life.

Habbibu · 08/03/2009 13:28

Yes, I always thought the advice was to stick with what you already do, or if you don't exercise, take up walking/swimming or somesuch, but don't take up anything new that's particularly strenuous/difficult. I guess it's like expat and others have said - it's not just about hurting the baby, it's about potentially dealing with bad injuries whilst pregnant.

Pav's friend hasn't followed that advice as she didn't usually ski, and had never skied on snow before.

Original poster
pavlovthecat · 08/03/2009 15:29

I am not blaming anyone other than her either. It was not down to her DP to stop her, it was her responsibility. However, that does not mean he should have actively encouraged her, persuaded her, badgered her to do it, as he did. It is his responsibility to do what he can to protect his girlfriend an unborn child, which I beleive was to suggest she did not to do it and then if she chose to, then her fault. He has been skiing before, he knows the risks. He also knows that if anyone would have an accident skiing, (what with being accident prone anyway), it would have been her...

She had done a lesson, finished for the day, then her, DP, and his dad went off for a ski on their own, she hit black ice (or something) and careered into a tree as she lost control. So it seems she was not on a learning slope.

OP posts:
expatinscotland · 08/03/2009 15:38

If she hit a tree she is very lucky she's not dead.

belgo · 08/03/2009 16:24

agree with expat. A very nasty accident that will take a long time to recover from, and could have been so much worse.

pooka · 08/03/2009 16:44

God - sounds horrible.

Not so much in terms of impact on the baby (prob pretty well-protected in utero). BUt in terms of recovery, physio, weight bearing, drugs, anaesthesia. All of that.

duchesse · 08/03/2009 17:01

The baby is small enough to be fine and well cushioned. If she had been 7 months pregnant, it would have been very different. She was unlucky to hurt herself. Most people come back from skiing trips without injury.

I think you are over-reacting. My views may be coloured by the fact that I went skiing at 16 weeks over half term two weeks ago. We were with friends, one of whom is a GP, and he thought it was fine.

< makes herself scarce >

expatinscotland · 08/03/2009 17:28

She hit a tree. A lot of people die hitting a tree because they sustain internal injuries in their abdomen - rupture their liver, pancreas, etc.

Her baby could easily have been killed and she could have bled to death in such an accident.

But I'm sure she's learned her lesson.

As has been said, she'll likely have the pain from it for the rest of her life.

LunarSea · 08/03/2009 17:35

Beginners skiing with partners/friends who've been before is nearly always a recipe for disaster. I've so often seen (and talked down) people who have been overfaced by the choice of route of their "friends" who haven't been in the lessons with them, and won't even have seen what they can do before they tell them that "you can do it, it's easy" (for me).

belgo · 08/03/2009 17:45

The baby is protected by being in the uterus, but she's very lucky that the baby wasn't harmed by such a forceful collision. It's not just the baby but also the placenta which needs to be unharmed.

duchesse · 08/03/2009 18:15

expat- if she had died, then the main tragedy would not have been the loss of her 16 week foetus, but her death. If she had died, her pregnancy would have been virtually irrelevant. If the child in question had been 10 year old and she had died, it would have been a tragedy, yes. But people with children do dangerous things, and things that are not obviously dangerous, and sometimes die. That is just life. (as it were). Of course it would be tragic, but the (extreme) alternative is to live in a padded bunker...

QuantitativeMeasure · 08/03/2009 18:20

When we went skiing at new year, one of DP's dads friends wife (thats a mouthful) was skiing at 6.5 months pregnant.

I thought this was incredibly stupid, the slopes were heaving- I had visions of her colliding with someone.

expatinscotland · 08/03/2009 18:20

There's a big difference between living in a padded bunker and being so moronic you take up a sport with a high potential for big falls when you're 16 weeks pregnant.

belgo · 08/03/2009 18:30

'If she had died, her pregnancy would have been virtually irrelevant. '

eh? do you really think so?

duchesse · 08/03/2009 19:28

erm...a fully grown woman, with a life behind, a loving family and a job vs an unborn unviable foetus that to all intents and purposes was indissociable from her- yes, I should say the major tragedy would be the loss of the woman. I don't see why anybody would value the life of an unviable foetus above that of a full grown woman...

Now if the foetus had been viable, or if due to the size of the foetus and its position any fall could have caused it any harm, I would agree with you. I do think there is a world of difference between a viable and an unviable foetus. (the death of that mother and her unborn 8.5 month twins in the Omagh bombings I consider to be a triple tragedy for example).

georgimama · 08/03/2009 19:30

How would that have been irrelevant?

"Pregnant woman killed in ski tragedy" sounds,and is, far sadder than "woman killed in ski tragedy."

By the by it has always annoyed me (though no doubt my annoyance is nothing compared to how the father feels about it) that the official death toll of the Omagh bomb excludes the unborn twins one of the women killed was carrying.

duchesse · 08/03/2009 19:33

Georgimama- the twins are listed among the victims on the memorial in Omagh I believe. It's just the media that mentions them in passing.

dragonbutter · 08/03/2009 19:56

this is all getting a bit overreactionary.
she broke her leg right?
that's all.

AitchTwoOh · 08/03/2009 20:07

db my mum gave birth to my db wearing a full leg cast. she does not recommend it.

dragonbutter · 08/03/2009 20:27

did it get soggy?
bluergh.

AitchTwoOh · 08/03/2009 20:31

i don't know if that was her primary concern. giving birth uphill, in stirrups, to a ten pound baby... most of it in his enormous head...

apparently some students came in and my mum was just like 'oh ffs i've no dignity anyway'.

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