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Original poster

My pregnant friend has just had a skiing accident...

167 replies

pavlovthecat · 07/03/2009 18:55

I am furious with her and her DP. Well, I am now I know she and baby are ok.

She has fractured her leg, skiiing in USA, while 16 weeks pg.

She has never been skiing before, thought it would be a good time to try, seeing her dp insisted she would be fine (apparantly gp said it was ok). And now she is likely to be in USA for a few weeks before she can fly home.

How could she put herself and her unborn child in danger like that?

I did not put this in AIBU, because to be honest, I don't think I am. I feel very cross.

OP posts:
Original poster
pavlovthecat · 07/03/2009 20:26

pointydog - it wont be a big telling off, promise!

OP posts:
hatwoman · 07/03/2009 20:31

I'm really quite shocked at the approbium and condemndation being heaped on this poor woman. I have friends who have skied when pg. it's standard medical advice that upto a certain point in the pregnancy (can;t remember when) there's no heightened risk.

she was deeply unfortunate but she took a calculated risk to do something she wanted to do. she took no more risk than we all do going in cars everyday. she's an adult. I would have thought the last thing she needs is to be "old off" like a naughty child.

Habbibu · 07/03/2009 20:36

If you're an experienced skier maybe, hatwoman, but she'd never done it before. That's Not a calculated risk - she had no means by which to do said calculation.

bellaboobum · 07/03/2009 20:59

And I think it is unfair to everyone else around her - even if she's willing to take the risk, it would be a dreadful thing for someone to live with if they inadvertently knocked her over and she lost the baby (or even the fact they were pregnant would be horrifying). Completely selfish and irresponsible. I had a friend who was planning to ski in early preg and I said the same to her.

Original poster
pavlovthecat · 07/03/2009 21:22

Hatwoman - the telling off bit, that was an aside that has been taken out of context really. My OP was about me being furious. I responded to a question about whether I would 'tell her off', but that was not the purpose of this thread.

OP posts:
expatinscotland · 07/03/2009 21:28

Don't worry, if she's in America, they will have well told her off.

hatwoman · 07/03/2009 21:29

I saw that pavlov - we cross-posted in fact . still think lots of people have been a bit harsh.

CoteDAzur · 07/03/2009 21:38

LOL @ "calculated risk"

She had never skied before. What exactly did she "calculate"?

Do you have any idea how many times you fall when learning to ski, especially as an adult? Snow is soft on your garden, but it's damn hard on a skiing piste.

expatinscotland · 07/03/2009 21:41

And then you get bored downhilling, so you think, 'Yeah, I'm going to telemark,' and you fall on your ass and wipeout about a million times again, just like when you started skiing, getting your ass spanked and all black and blue.

hatwoman · 07/03/2009 21:42

you don't need to have skied before to work out how likely you are to injure yourself or jeopardise your pregnancy.

in fact, direct experience would quite likely give you a distorted view of the real risk - you would base it on your own experience.

CoteDAzur · 07/03/2009 21:44

What?

Habbibu · 07/03/2009 21:44

But your own experience would be a better indicator of your own level of risk, based on your skills, co-ordination, knowledge of the area, etc than a broader population-level risk. And as Cote said, she'd have known just how much she might fall.

expatinscotland · 07/03/2009 21:46

do you ski, hatwoman?

Habbibu · 07/03/2009 21:46
hatwoman · 07/03/2009 21:49

yes. I have skied since I was 20. I remember well how hard learning is. I have also had quite a serious accident which saw me lying on the snow thinking I had broken my neck and lost an eye and being helicoptered off the slopes. that was last year and I'll be skiing again at Easter.

expatinscotland · 07/03/2009 21:50

It's free heeling, backcountry skiing, Hab.

expatinscotland · 07/03/2009 21:52

I had an accident whilst training on an XC resort in Colorado. In order to avoid hitting a tree, I tore my left ACL, took out the cartilage in the meniscus and tibial plateau of my left knee and broke my tailbone.

Was back to it about a year later, though.

AitchTwoOh · 07/03/2009 21:54

you're all such meanies. her doctor told her it was okay, you should be angry at him. the poor woman was in no position to calculate risk, having never skied before, so she took bad advice.

and who has a perfect pregnancy? i sure as hell didn't...

hatwoman · 07/03/2009 21:55

i have a friend who telemarks. he looks like he's curtseying. most entertaining.

expatinscotland · 07/03/2009 21:57

nothing like it to get in shape, hat.

i think it might be called randonee here, although i think that actually might refer to when you get that binding that lets you free-heel on the way up, with skins on your skis, but lock down for the descent.

CoteDAzur · 07/03/2009 22:08

If you have skied, how can you say "you don't need to have skied before to work out how likely you are to injure yourself or jeopardise your pregnancy"?

In fact, how can you say at all something as bizarrely nonsensical as "direct experience would quite likely give you a distorted view of the real risk - you would base it on your own experience."???

Having done an activity before, you know what can happen and with what frequency. It is insane to think she is a better judge of the risks involved because she has never skied.

And obviously she wasn't a good judge of the risk, was she - lying in hospital with a fractured leg, no less

hatwoman · 07/03/2009 22:14

cote - how do you think insurance companies work out risk? it's not remotely bizarre or nonsensical to say that if you base a judgment of risk on your own experience then it will be a distorted judgment. teh actual risk is based on much more than teh experience of one person. if I nearly get run over I'm likely to think that the risk of getting run over is higher. it's not.

expatinscotland · 07/03/2009 22:14

What state is she in, pavlov?

Habbibu · 07/03/2009 22:18

Nah, Aitch - I think she made a bad decision, I really do. And god knows I'm not all about the perfect pregnancy either, but to go ski-ing for the first time when pregnant?

hatwoman, I do think that an awareness of your own levels of ability have got to play a large part in calculating a risk like this, beyond population-level risk.

hatwoman · 07/03/2009 22:20

cote - just read your post again. "Having done an activity before, you know what can happen and with what frequency" is just not true. plenty of people do activities with absolutely no idea of teh possible consequences or of their frequency. I've skied for 18 years and, tbh, I have hardly any idea at all how likely I am to break a leg. I've never looked up the relevant stats.

and the fact that she did break a leg tells you nothing about how good a judge of risk she was. say the real risk of it happening was 1 in a 100. it actually happening doesn;t change that. it also tells you nothing about whether she thought it was about 1 in a million or one in 2.