The Great Cancer Recovery part 5

[Topofthecliffs]

Amazingly we have now filled four threads and are ready to start again. How time flies when you are being purposeful! Come and join in.

You may have finished active treatment for cancer, be in remission or NED. You want to look forward not dwell on the past. You know you ought to be eating well, exercising more and picking up the threads of your old life. Join us and share the ups and downs of recovery. We understand!
Here are some resources we found helpful:
The Mountain Lion
https://www.cancerpal.co.uk/post/what-it-s-really-like-to-receive-a-cancer-diagnosis
Peter Harvey on Psychology of recovery:
https://workingwithcancer.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/After-the-treatment-finishes-then-what.pdf
Resources from Penny Brohn:
https://pennybrohn.org.uk/our-approach/resources/
Breast Cancer Now Moving Forward:
https://breastcancernow.org/information-support/support-you/moving-forward
Get your Oomph Back with Carolyn Garritt
http://www.oomph.london/home.html
Charity providing treats for cancer patients:
https://somethingtolookforwardto.org.uk/
Exercise is good for you:
^https://www.webmd.com/cancer/features/exercise-cancer-patients^
Any more suggestions? Post them below

(There is a thread for those suspected to have cancer, or newly diagnosed and facing treatment, and also a thread for those with Stage IV cancer who want to talk to others in the same boat, and you are welcome on any or all of these)

Welcome @Ohjoyohbliss Sorry to hear about your cancer and immune system being destroyed. I had a different cancer breast cancer with chemo/radio/surgeries etc so maybe different but I think most on here have found the recovery gradual and also the anxiety around reoccurence tends to reduce with time. It maybe worth trying different activities - when I had finished treatment I could swim fine but walking was really difficult but as I built up the swimming the walking got better and back to normal pretty much.

Thanks for this. I'm hoping to swim again at some point but I've only just had my PICC line removed and now it's school holidays, so I probably won't go until September.

I've always loved walking and was a Ramblers member but it will be a long time before I'm at that level. There's now a women's walking group in my local town and they only do around two miles, so my target now is to work up to that. Before I got ill, I would have scoffed at two miles but now even half a mile, very slowly, leaves me exhausted.

I really struggled with walking after treatment, due to breathing, pain, neuropathy and could not walk far at all and old people with walking sticks were almost overtaking me. Swimming I could swim a mile in one go week of radio🤔I could also kayak fine. It was a bit odd, some things were not that different to before (ones were not upright) and other things I felt like I had been run over by a bus several times. It does get better with time and for me what helped was building up the sports I could do then the walking got better. I also went into overweight category for first time on Tamoxifen (menopause from chemo) and losing weight helped with walking and joint pain, less to carry though hard going to lose but worth it.

Welcome @ohjoyohbliss and sorry that you have had cancer. I had a different type and so different treatment, but felt very run down by the end of it and couldn't walk any distance at all. Similarly to @MrsSPenguinz I've found recovery to be gradual. The first bit was much slower than I expected and I found it really frustrating but did then gradually start to be able to do more. I'm back to normal activity levels now. I hope things start to improve for you soon but do take things slowly to start with - I realise that is difficult when you are craving a bit of normality.

Just been preparing for old shed to be taken down, we are all ready, shed is cleared, lane is cleared, garden is done.

Just popping in to say Welcome to @Ohjoyohbliss and well done for getting through active treatment. It does feel odd when it ends and you look around at what your life has become. I think I have learned compassion for myself and don't expect to be able to do what I managed before. I echo what the others have said about going gently and not pushing yourself too much. I guess you will be monitoring yourself for weight loss or sweats or fatigue if there aren't any regular scans. It's hard not to catastrophise.
I have had both my DDs here this week which has been fun but tiring. DGS is almost walking now and is full of energy. I am suffering a bit in the heat but manage to get things done early or late in the day.
I haven't been to look at my allotment yet, I am dreading seeing what has died in the heat. @Zoopet are you able to water your plot? I only have the rain water I harvested over the winter.
@MrsSPenguinz that's very interesting about the GLP1 drugs and cancer. I had been leaving my BMI at around 26 as that is linked to longevity in over 65s but maybe it's just an excuse not to be more disciplined and get my weight down properly.
Good news on the garages PP application. The Bat man said no sign of bats! Phew. One more step completed. After this weekend I am going to have a decluttering week and be really ruthless. Be afraid DH, very afraid!

Great news from batman @Topofthecliffs

We were supposed to have the old shed taken down today to make it easier for the neighbour to remove their dead tree but DS staged a sit in under a pale pink fleece blanket so they could not take it down. It would also leave us for 4.5 months with no shed even if get approval first time so we are seeing if they can take the neighbours dead tree down with our shed in place, we are 45cms from it. Impression I get is that is possible but more difficult but DS was crying about his shed and I want to keep this one until we get a new one for him.

I spent a few hours cleaning shed and downstairs so at least that's done and its been useful to clear shed anyway. DH also told me he had almost taken the fence down and when I went out it was all there. 😂Though that wouldn't have stopped anything as they could have gone through garden.

Yes I think around 24/25/26 is the healthiest for bmi in older age group though I do feel healthier and find it easier to do things now at 23 but its more vanity than health.

Hi@Topofthecliffs
Luckily we are still able to water our plots.
( I'm in North Yorkshire)
Lots of watering cans taking water from my neighbour's numerous water barrels to keep the whole plot watered but they are getting very low on water.
My neighbour hasn't been well so I'm doing all the weeding and watering atm.
So far all the crops are ok.( Crosses fingers.)
We have some rain forecast but not enough to make any difference.
My oldest son lives in France near the Pyrenees so I'm watching the news anxiously.

Hope your eldest son is fine @Zoopet.

We went to Sandringham Flower Show on Sunday, had Sunday lunch at the Sandringham estate restaurant, went round flower show and the church and had cake in aid of the church and got a plant.

Just spent 3.5 hours gardening and cleaning kitchen today with DH, good to get that done and planted the plant, cleaned the silkies, cleared leaves etc. Friday we have a vineyard tour, wine tasting and seafood. DH is going to France soon and DD is coming home then going to France herself.

@MrsSPenguinz that sounds lovely - Sandringham is lovely - I have friends in that part of Norfolk (not royal or ex royals!) Beautiful beaches too.

I had chemo in summer 2024 - at the same time DPs best friend had chemo for bladder cancer. Just found out his has returned and it’s made me so angry. Just when I felt the horizon was clear. Want to give him a big hug.

So sorry about DPs best friend having cancer back @Littlecaf

@MrsSPenguinz Sandringham sounds fun. I like a good mooch round a stately home vegetable patch!
@Littlecaf in a former life I worked on a urology ward and the bladder cancer guys were long term attenders having tiny recurrences removed every six months, They seemed well and stable but kept growing new tumours like mushrooms popping up on a lawn. That was forty years ago mind so I expect things have changed now and treatment is more targeted. Sorry about your friend.
I cleared out lots of metal to the recycling today, and rewarded myself with a nice pair of Ilex lollipop trees and some posh pots for them to stand guard in at the entrance to Tops Towers. Then I went sailing and won another race! My EXH was out racing and didn't do very well as he is out of practice. What a shame.
Tomorrow is Pilates in the Park and I am quite enthusiastic as I can really feel the benefit of doing this when I am clambering around boats. It has helped my strength and balance hugely, plus it is fun!

@SummerCycling I was thinking about what you said and how lovely it is to live here close to the moors and the sea and be able to enjoy my hobbies. I am very lucky and I know it. Almost every day we get news of another friend who has been ill or died and we count our blessings. It seems all the sweeter after what we have been through too. I will never take health and fitness for granted, and try not to waste any time on things that don’t bring joy!

Thanks, all, for the welcome. I'm interested in the BMI discussion. Before cancer, I was just into the obese band on the NHS BMI calculator (i.e. just above overweight.) Now I'm just above the healthy/overweight line.

For most of my treatment I have been struggling to eat due to nausea etc and dieticians' advice was to just eat anything I could and not worry about what it was. Since my appetite started to return I've tried to concentrate on more healthy eating and I was thinking that I should try to lose the extra 2kg to put me into the "healthy" range. It's not a high priority as I still can't exercise much, but maybe I'll rethink if 26 is ok.

I certainly can't contemplate strenuous activity like gardening or sailing yet but it's brilliant reading about all of you doing it. Improving core strength and balance through pilates @Topofthecliffs sounds perfect conditioning for sailing and congratulations on your race win. Even better that your XH did badly. I hope to be able to get back to yoga in September, depending on the infection risk.

Well done on the sailing win @Topofthecliffs and enjoy the pilates.

You have done so well to get down from obese to just above healthy line @Ohjoyohbliss from a health point of view I think that's already enough. I carried on and lost another stone and a half to get down to bmi of 23 and ideally would like to get to 22 but its more psychological / appearance and won't improve health outcomes. I think I associate the higher weight with cancer/my DS being in hospital and the appearance changes with cancer (chemo curls, losing hair, losing breast, putting on weight) so I was very keen to be the weight I used to be with the appearance I used to have which I have back now. For me it feels like getting my life back from good times. I do also find things like walking especially uphill, coping with hot weather much easier at the lighter weight and almost all my aches and pains have gone plus I find people are nicer to me. I am completely failing at losing more though as I love ice cream and keep eating kellys clotted cream and haagen dazs ones. This does make me popular with DS though as he loves ice cream and he loves us gardening so he can have unlimited access to the freezer with ice creams. He manages to stay stick thin. I miss the days I could do that, menopause, argh.

34C here today and I did think would be a lazy day but we have a sparrowhawk about and so will need to go to the garden to accompany the silkies which means I will be gardening and doing the shed. They ate a pigeon yesterday in our garden.

@Ohjoyohbliss I would never be so petty to celebrate XH coming last in a race 😎but I am a bit cross with him because we are all really excited about my DS wedding next month and have been planning it for two years and XH has just announce he is going to marry his GF 2 days after the wedding. My DC are a bit shocked he has made it all about himself as usual. No change there then. But I shall just smile and nod.
I shall restart yoga in September too. I like the calmness it brings.

@MrsSPenguinz I wasn't trying to lose weight, I just couldn't eat. When I got an infection during chemo I was losing almost a kilogram a day (6kg in 7 days.) That's what left me so weak.

I was very keen to be the weight I used to be with the appearance I used to have which I have back now. For me it feels like getting my life back from good times.

I love this. Good for you!

@Topofthecliffs That's insane he's arranged his wedding for 2 days after DS's.

So sorry about the infection, that's rough @Ohjoyohbliss Hopefully can build you strength up again gradually. Most of us on here are a few years out and back to full fitness but it is a gradual process and you build up. I have a tracker in my emails where I count the number of minutes exercise per week and weekly average for the year and its nice to see it rising each year.

That seems an odd thing for your ex to do @Topofthecliffs. Won't your DS be on honeymoon for a start? Though I would still tell him to go if he is if he's known the date for 2 years.

Just ordered a cordless sander and DH is off to collect it, will use it for the shed. Then out in garden when he's back to protect silkies from sparrowhawk - am not sure how much gardening or shedding will get done at 34C, will see.

Oh @Topofthecliffs what a weird thing for your ex to do. Doesn't that mean that your DS won't be able to go?

I'm very pleased that my fingernails are pretty much back to their former strength - I didn't lose any during chemo, but they became really brittle and flaky. Oncologist thought it was due to Tamoxifen, but it must have been chemo doing its thing. Whatever, I'm pleased. I've always painted my nails, it's a 'me' thing, so I'm happy to get back to that. Toenails have grown back, too. And hair is doing well. God, I sound so vain, but it makes me feel so much better about myself.

I lost so much weight during chemo, and really didn't have it to lose, so while I'm happy to have filled out, I'd like to get rid of the Tamoxifen belly that's appeared🙁 Although my appetite has improved, I'm still not eating as much as I did pre-cancer, so I've got no idea how! Do I have to be on some sort of starvation rations? If I do that, I won't have the nutrition for my weights workouts. Gah!! All questions to ask the oncologist at the beginning of September.

I have to be on 1350 calories a day plus any exercise calories can eat (allow 200 an hour for gardening, partly why I am so keen on it as main way can eat nice things like cake and banana splits) since menopause which is depressingly low but it'll vary from person to person. Also if I eat sugar or salt then that can temporarily put weight up but it goes afterwards so that makes it a bit tricker to chart.

Did a couple of hours gardening today and when weighed myself today 2 lbs down so happy with that and the garden is looking good too, its been a bit of a battle with the heat but nothing has died. Well no whole plants or lawn.

Thanks @MrsSPenguinz . I think I'm probably eating between 1200 and 1400 already. Maybe not even that much. I workout and walk everywhere, if I cut down on food I'm not sure I'd have the strength! Maybe I'll try less food, and see what happens.

XH hasn't invited the DC to his registry office do, but I think there is a party planned later. I keep out of his business as much as I can unless he upsets the DC. They do a lot of eye rolling where he is concerned.
I won another race tonight.Whoop!

Compared to @MrsSPenguinz I am very ill disciplined. I have no idea how many calories I eat, but was able to lose the chemo weight gain over a year each time with reduced cake and puddings and no alcohol. My diet is pretty good, with a mainly veggie organic diet full of fruit and veg and cheese and fish and chicken. DH is my undoing with his pasties and bacon and cake bargains. I burn off the cake with cycling about eight hours a week, so if I don't cycle I either have to forgo the cake or accept a weight gain. I walk a lot more these days, and do yoga and Pilates every week. Not having to go to work helps a lot with fitness! My sailing is pretty neutral as it isn't very physically demanding, and there are lots of snacks, but it keeps me strong and makes me happy. Interestingly this summer friends have commented on how I seem to be back to my former fitness so I must have crossed some recovery threshold I didn't know was there! It all takes such a long time, and long time followers of these threads know that I went through the whole cancer triathlon twice in three years.
Newcomers take heed! It is a slow process and you are meant to enjoy it, so be kind to yourself and do lots of fun things you enjoy!

It definitely takes a lot longer to recover than most people think!

Having slept on it, I realise I don't actually need to lose weight, the rest of me, excluding the Tamoxifen belly, is still slim (8/10). Not sure what to do really. When I had my blissful 8 week break from Tamoxifen, the belly started to go. It was great!

It's difficult @BatshitCrazyWoman I also find if I go too low I have no energy and also if I cut out sugar too much can also happen though too much sugar and I am hungry all the time. I have to count calories as I am not disciplined other than counting and otherwise I would eat cake and banana splits all day as if I don't count they are calorie free, it would start with I will just have a little slice of cake then another little slice. I find the best way is to be quite active then I feel strong from being active and also can eat cake and ice cream. It sounds like you are pretty thin already. I just have my hips to go rest of me is fine, its because of diep, they just to do a second operation to sort it but now don't. I am not even sure losing more weight will solve it but it would get me back to BMI of 22.0 which I was pre cancer. It's only half a stone to go but it is so slow though when I garden every day it gets faster when I don't eat banana splits 2 times a day If you aren't drinking enough add drinks may help clear excess fluid. I can also get inflammation from sugar now which I never got before, goes in a day.

Well done on the race @Topofthecliffs

Off to a vineyard tour with DH where we have a plate each of local seafood. I don't even really drink but was something to do and DH was keen. 10.30am seems very early for wine though. We finally got a tiny bit of rain last night, it feels strange being in UK and wanting rain.