Bum surgery- is it really worth it?

[oberst]

I'm not sure what else to call it, it could be a haemorroidectomy but not sure as doctor has said it's more like a skin tag now.

I have had this pile (dw I won't upload a photo 🫠) for 12 years. It inflates and flares up then deflates like a balloon.

When it flares up, it can be itchy and sore; especially with a bowel movement but it's not AGONISING. It's just 'there' and annoying and uncomfortable. This happens every couple of months. I've done creams and suppositories.

My main reason for removal though is because it doesn't look very nice. I don't like my partner going down there, and I get all on edge when we are intimate. I don't want to feel like this every time, I love sex and intimacy but this just puts me off. I hate it.

I went to see my consultant yesterday, he said it was more like a skin tag than anything. He has seen the photos of when it is flared up. It's probably the size of a blueberry but deflated. Then it gets swollen when flared up.

I have heard and read that the recovery for this is excruciating. Because they just slice it off and that's it. No sutures etc.

The consultant said they'd give me laxatives and pain relief. But the horror stories out there are making me so anxious.

Because it's not internal and it's just one, will it still be just as bad?

The position of it is basically the nearest to my vagina, if that makes sense.

Do I go ahead and just put up with the pain?

It's set for the 17th July. I go on holiday for two weeks on the 9th August and get married in October. Will it be worth it? It is bloody annoying when it flares up and it is unsightly.

Anyone out there who's had the procedure? Any advice?

Thank you!

Following with interest as I have the same but mine look like two small tiny dog ears. And other times resemble a raisin. TMI!

I want them removed because I find it harder to, ahem, clean myself? Seems to take forever with them and I remember my normal arse being much easier to clean

My friend had this and regretted it. She said it was the most painful thing she’s ever had (and she’s given birth!). The recovery was awful and lasted weeks and weeks. She was vomiting with the pain at points.
She is still having problems and wishes she’d never had it.

Oh that's interesting as the consultant said it would be fine as it'll be 3.5 weeks after surgery!

I joined a group and everyone is basically saying the same thing 😞

I feel like this thread is talking two different issues. Havubg a heammoroid cut off, very painful, but just the left over skin tag is not months worth of agony.

Am just recovering from a different surgery and it is awful. I would honestly be buying a Japanese toilet (or German?) and having therapy to deal with my feelings about it...

I think people are talking of different things. My friend had her haemorrhoids removed and she was in agony for a couple of weeks but then went for a weekend away with me after three weeks. So had about two to three weeks of horror but then was okay after that albeit she still has to take the laxative sachets.

I was wondering what its getting filled with? Pus, blood, poo? Any of which sound awful!

An older neighbour had a haemorrhoidectomy and gave me a detailed run down! NO- I certainly didn't ask 🙄. She was advised sitz baths several times a day and after each bowel movement. A handful of salt added to just warm water in a plastic bucket- like a washing up bowl. She'd then sit on it to soothe and clean herself.

I think it took her months to fully recover, but as others have said, yours is a skin tag, so I assume if removed when deflated, wouldn't be as bad. If the entire thing is only as big as a blueberry when 'full' then hopefully the stalk attaching it when deflated isn't too large.

Well, this is what I am hoping if I am honest! But I didn't know a skin tag could look identical to a pile? So I am really unsure what it is myself! Because surely if it's still flaring up there is some kind of a pile there still?

I had one removed about 7 years ago, would describe it as exactly the same as yours op. Would flare up and down, sometimes be ok, sometimes hurt a lot. I had it removed as a day case under general anaesthetic and sent home with stool softeners and paracetamol.

It was weeks and weeks of pain that got worse and worse the more I healed. Consultant said the pain gets worse before it gets better because as the wound closes it knits back together and the nerve endings kick in.

By 6 weeks I was in an absolute mess even though I was technically healing well and I ended up on morphine. I thought I was never going to be out of pain ever again.

I turned a corner after week 7 and things improved slowly then but it felt like a long time and I really suffered. There is absolutely no way I would risk having it done right before a holiday or wedding. You need a very clear schedule and serious help if you have children.

Oh god I'm so sorry you suffered like that!! I honestly do not know if I'm going to have the surgery or not. I'm not sure it's worth it. My flare ups suck, and they aren't comfortable and can hurt bad but they last a week perhaps 2, and they go again. I just don't think I can do the recovery

Could you postpone the operation until after your holiday and wedding?

Yours does sound like a pile rather than a akin tag. My mum had all her piles removed and a fissure stitched at the same time, she did have months off work but she said it was so worth it. She wasn't bothered about the appearance but the not feeling clean and the pain sitting down. She never got any again after that as they were from childbirth.
I think as it's just 1 it shouldn't be too bad 🤞🏼

I would like to get mine done. I have several and its difficult to be clean even with wet wipes and it gets worse. I would say 99 out of 100 mumsnet stories I have read have been horror shows so am nit sure. Plus I can't afford 2 to 3 months off work as I'm self employed. I also can't afford weeks of childcare. And of course the pain. I also have higher risk of scaring compared to the average mumsnetter. Am sick of this anal tag /haemorrhoid life its depressing. And it does affect intimacy as its unsightly and you are never 100% sure you are whistle clean. Am almost in tears writing about it. My life just gets shittier in every way and this just adds to other shitty things in it. @Growlybear83 glad you could laugh about it.

I had a skin tag removed from that area and they burnt it off.

That may be different to pile removal though.

I had one removed at the same time as I had bowel surgery and would absolutely have it done again in a heartbeat.

I had an internal pile that thrombosed. I was having pain, itching and most importantly loads of scary bleeding so I had to get it sorted. I had mine done privately under general anaesthetic and I don’t think my consultant adequately prepared me for the recovery.

now I’m glad I had it done but at the time I really regretted it because it is extremely painful. My recovery took about 10 days but I think I was one of the lucky ones! Things that will help is to get a sitz bath that goes on your toilet, fill it with warm water and sit on it. Sometimes for a long time. Instillagel from the pharmacy which is an anaesthetic cream - I used a lot of that. Haemorrhoid cream in between, and strong painkillers. I couldn’t really leave the house because you don’t have much control over your bowels at the start - you’ll think “I need to go” then have literal seconds to get to the toilet. I don’t have children but I would have been unable to look after any so factor that in too.

I wouldn’t have it done before your holiday.

Ive had loads banded. Never felt anything. Not a very dignified procedure. Just told not to poo until the next day.

I really seriously looked into this but when I was a new nurse I worked on a general surgery ward and on nightshift one night we were chatting and everyone with agreement said that it was the worst surgery for pain and bleeding post op. I do definitely have problems with smearing and pain but I think some of that is related to a bad tear in childbirth and I'm not convinced it would have actually solved the problems I have.

When I lived in the middle East I went for a consultation with a private doctor (got pregnant so couldn't go ahead) and they had some different methods, none were an incision it was either a laser to disrupt the blood supply and then it would drop off or they used a staple to cut of blood supply and staple the prolapsed tissue back where it should be. Apparently they report less pain and complications but I never went ahead so can't give an honest review.

Fwiw I can totally agree with how it affects your sex life, I'm incredibly conscious of mine.

Had it done in April and no pain at all. Glad it's gone. Mine was nhs as it was causing issues

Reading all the above I'm thanking the bum gods somewhere. Perhaps I was lucky, perhaps I had a good surgeon, perhaps mine was a simple skin tag with no piles. I do know the surgeon was telling everyone in the ward having piles removed that recovery was painful. Mine was a simple Chop off.

I had an hemorrhoidectomy and removal of an anal skin tag many years ago. Surgeon said the pain I would feel after the surgery would be nothing compared to the pain I must have been feeling for many months before and he was right. Obviously, it's not a great surgery and healing can take a while due to the location, but it certainly wasn't that bad. Good luck!

That's what I was going to suggest. Whether or not you decided to go ahead with the removal, it sounds like it would be much better after your holiday/wedding.

I saw the title but I scrolled past 🤣

@GingerScallop I hear you. I'm in a similar situation, ANd it is miserable. A
I use this to clean after a poo.

https://wypeuk.com/