@Florabritannica I hear you with the wanting to disappear in a puff of smoke. I have had that feeling regularly over the course of this rollercoaster. Thankfully, those feelings are not constant.
As to WLE, I haven't had that, but I understand (from others here, and those I know offline) that the cosmetic results are often ok. As to recovery, I agree with others (and I had mastectomy and DIEP all in one) that the worst is the lymphnode removal/biopsy. That said, not everyone has major issues with that either. I had terrible cording though, still partly visible now over 5 months on and some arm swelling ongoing. The cording does get better though even if you are unlucky enough to have it as bad as me. I have regained full range of motion and it has faded to a great extent, despite starting off with multiple cords running all the way down to my hand and being really restricted in my movements for ages. I can now swim, reach things high up, etc. Still have the swelling situation though.
On that, if you get any swelling at all in your arm, my advice is to not wait but to get checked asap, as prophylactic temporary sleeve wearing, self-massage and exercise can stop it in its tracks or, worse case scenario, stop it from ever progressing to a really visible stage. I have it more or less under control at the moment. It is not obvious to others and am looking into options for LVA surgery, but have to wait for my next review in January to discuss any further options. A really dreaded consequence though of surgery and time consuming to stop from progressing. I do get really down about it, but am trying to focus on what might be able to be done about it rather than on the fact that its there. Plus there are plenty of other things to be down about to distract from this one!
Saw thyroid surgeon today. He is one of those 'It is entirely up to you' doctors, even when you need strong steering from an expert. He kept repeating to me the risk stats and then saying it was up to me to decide whether to have surgery or not. I am going away for X-mas anyway, so will not set a date until I get back, but I think I am heading towards cancer risk-reduction over avoiding the risk of bad consequences (terrified of possible effect on voice - as much as I like typing on this forum, real life speaking is hard to beat!).