SORRY VERY LONG POST Nightmare pregnancy really worried!

[ChanFirstTimer86]

Hi guys this is my first and only ever pregnancy. I am 18 weeks today and 35. Now abit about me I started very obese 16ish stone at 5ft1. I also have IBS and constipation anyway due to painkillers. In 18 weeks I have gone up nearly 3st!!! Im nearly 19st (I cant remember my exact start weight it was 16 something) I am extremely constipated. I am on 3 different types of laxatives and still struggle with my BMs. Im also severely dehydrated (im not diabetic). My whole life I have been a constant urinater day and night. Literally 30 times or more every single day. I cannot drink the recommended amount of water its just not worth the toilet trips. During my pregnancy Im still going to the toilet excessively but I have dry mouth, cracked skin side of my nose and dry lips. Which is madness to say I am still urinating constantly. I am wondering if I weigh so much because of a combination of IBS bloating and constipation made worse by pregnancy and pain killers and also swelling due to water retention? my midwife is really annoying. She just constantly says she doesnt know what I am going to do if I keep gaining like I am all the way through! which is not helpful. She is also dismissing Im developing SPD because of how soon. I tried to explain to her im 7st over obese (30 BMI) and 9st over Overweight! (28BMI) a baby weighs 6 to 10 pounds so yes eventhough I am not far along it doesnt matter what a baby isnt pushing on me because of the relaxin and my heavy weight it makes sense that I have been experiencing it early. I have all the symptoms back ache, vagina ache and pain, pelvic ache and pain, top thigh ache and pain, knee pain, pain when gettin up and down, standing, walking etc. I am eating really well sure I eat massive portions but so many vegetables and fruits. I do eat the odd treat but not bad enough to have gained so much weight. I havent EVER put on weight so fast and Ive eaten much much worse. I just dont know what to do I feel so unsupported. My mum had her last baby 15 years ago she cant remember much and im single and live alone so got no one to help me. Im just really scared this weight will not stop creeping up. The thing thats making me feel a little better is my clothes still fit except for the tummy area and breast area. If someone had gained nearly 3st of actual weight it would be allover wouldnt it? my legs would have gotten bigger arms etc. Another thing is my shoes dont fit by the evening another sign of swelling. REALLY sorry for the long post I just dont know what to do. I have physical hunger but no appetite. Meaning I get up in the morning because im experiencing the worst hunger pangs of my life that snacks dont even touch I have to get alot of food down me to make them go. Because I am trying to eat well thats a heck of alot of food and yeah its just depressing when you dont have the desire to actually eat it. Thanks in advance for any shared experiences or advice x

Sounds like a lot of water retention. How’s your blood pressure? Do you have PCOS?

@DownWhichOfLate

Sounds like a lot of water retention. How’s your blood pressure? Do you have PCOS?

Hi blood pressure is always fine never had a problem with it. I dont have any health problems except asthma and mental ones. My obesity hadnt started affecting me until pregnancy. I dont have PCOS I had very long cycles 35 days and only a 72 hour period but nothing else. I think its water retention too I wish my MW was more understanding Ive mentioned to her Ive read on here that women have gone through SPD from 14 weeks just like me and she told me not to pay attention to the site :( im sure women dont come on here to lie and say theyve been diagnosed with something when they havent just for a laugh!!

Are you under consultant care due to your BMI? When did you last get checked for diabetes? (Lots of questions!). Try to not worry

@DownWhichOfLate

Are you under consultant care due to your BMI? When did you last get checked for diabetes? (Lots of questions!). Try to not worry

I dont know if my care if any different to anyone elses as never done it before. Its mentioned in my book I have a high BMI. And im sure they mentioned at my 12 week scan about me needing an anesthetist consultation. I have had checks throughout my life obviously I get my bloods and urine checked every time i see midwife (im seeing her in the morning) they will check me for Gestational Diabetes when necessary but like I have explained I have had the problem with urination and dry mouth my whole life I remember as a kid when we stayed at my uncles they made us pee in a bucket on the landing so not to go down the stairs at night and I was always up 4 or so times in a night its my whole life its nothing to do with diabetes. My grandad had type 1 diabetes but no one else has had it.

The constant urination and dry mouth etc are screaming thyroid issues to me especially with your uncontrolled weight gain. Unfortunately care regarding thyroid can be awful in this country, with v low levels deemed as ‘normal’. Have you had your levels checked recently? If not I would push with your GP and if you have the means, get checked privately.

@HastySlander

The constant urination and dry mouth etc are screaming thyroid issues to me especially with your uncontrolled weight gain. Unfortunately care regarding thyroid can be awful in this country, with v low levels deemed as ‘normal’. Have you had your levels checked recently? If not I would push with your GP and if you have the means, get checked privately.

Ive had my thyroid checked before and youre right it is something I should definitely look into! I know this is naughty but I illegally bought t3 before you know the thyroid hormone and it absolutely incinerated the weight off me but I assumed as it was on a bodybuilding site it would do that to anyone with even a normal thyroid. I think maybe private help might be the answer

btw my weight gain usually I can lose weight when I want to I can drop a stone very easily adjusting my diet and exercise routine. I just never stick it out. Wouldnt I struggle if I had thyroid issues? then again my weight loss does seem to stall very easily when I am on a roll thats usually what makes me give up

I forgot to say I regularly lose 4 or more pounds passing a BM. I have even lost 7 pounds overnight. Thats why I dont think the weight gain is fat. I have took some stronger laxatives tonight to hopefully clear myself out by the time of my appointment tomorrow. Im going to see a pain specialist tomorrow but my MW will be there too. I think i will try and see if the pain Dr can arrange for my own GP to sort out some thyroid tests. Im so afraid of how immobile I will be by the end of my pregnancy im already in absolute agony and cant do many things for myself. Its embarassing to say but because of how many times I have to urinate I am currently going in my recycling bin that I brought. Its the perfect height that I can get on without bending my knees. (imagine bending your knees 30 times a day when you have chronic knee pain :( it will make you pee in a bin) The bins quite high though I dont think Ill be able to use it once im further along and less steady! its all so annoying I wanted to stay active and I can barely walk

bump as anyone get anymore experiences?

Have you been specifically checked for diabetes recently?I had GD and never had sugars in my urine so MW was really surprised when the GTT result came back at 26weeks as definitely GD.

What is your diet like, can you post a typical days food, that will help to identify if weight gain is likely to be due to over eating or if another reason beyond the expected amniotic fluid/placenta/baby gain should be considered.

SECOND TRIMESTER CALS NEEDED PER DAY 2460

SATURDAY

ate about 2am
small portion overnight oats (about 20g oats, 20g strawberry yoghurt, 18g chia seeds 100ml semi milk, tsp peanut butter
powder) topped with some frozen strawberries

ate about 8am
slightly larger portion overnight oats (about 30g oats, 20g strawberry yoghurt, 20g chia seeds 150ml semi milk, tsp peanut butter
powder) topped with some frozen strawberries + cup of tea with a spoon of biscoff spread (about 70 cals)

ate about 12pm
5 skinny chicken sausages (only 260 cals in total 2 tesco pork are 277 cals) 8 cherry toms, 2 slices seeded wholemeal toast
with butter, 2 eggs and big handful of spinach leaves + sugar free ribena with a scoop of collagen powder (99 cals)

ate about 15:20

large cucumber chunk sliced horizontal spread with tuna mayo, 2 brown rice cakes with smear of passionfruit curd (1 with sprinkle
of chia seeds and one with sprinkle of flax seeds) medium granny smith apple, sprinkle dried cranberries, sprinkle whole skin
on almonds, about 5 dried apricots and small pile of mixed olives

cup of tea

ate at 20:00

homemade oxtail + beer stew (1 piece oxtail, gravy, beer, onion and carrot), mashed potato (skin on potatoes, butter, milk and low fat greek yoghurt),
air fryer carrots, leftover peas and sweetcorn

ate at 23:40

very small bowl overnight oats (made from a big batch not sure of amounts oats, chia seeds, small bit of greek yoghurt, peanut butter powder, collagen powder, lactose free
milk and water) with a small sprinkle of whole skin on almonds and dried cranberries

SUNDAY

ate about 4am

very small bowl overnight oats (made from a big batch not sure of amounts oats, chia seeds, small bit of greek yoghurt, peanut butter powder, collagen powder, lactose free
milk and water) with defrosted fresh strawberries

ate about 10am

medium to large bowl overnight oats (made from a big batch not sure of amounts oats, chia seeds, small bit of greek yoghurt, peanut butter powder, collagen powder, lactose free
milk and water) with defrosted fresh strawberries, sprinkle of whole almonds with skin and dried cranberries. Glass of sugar free ribena and cup of tea with spoonful
of biscoff spread (about 90 cals)

ate at 14:30

uncle bens wholegrain chicken rice (398 cals) 3 skinny chicken sausages (156 cals) 8 cherry tomatoes, boiled sweetcorn and fine
grating of extra mature cheese

cup of tea

ate at 7pm
2 chicken thighs airfried, mash leftover from yesterday (skin on potatoes, butter, milk and low fat greek yoghurt) mushy peas, gravy, 1 homemade yorkshire, savoy
cabbage and carrots some air fried mini crispy potatoes

ate at 22:42

medium granny smith apple, 12g whole almonds skin on, 15g dried cranberries and 16g extra mature cheese

i dont have sugar in my teas btw

You’re eating a huge amount of carbs OP and many times a day. Can you eat a larger meal in one go and eat 3 times rather than 5.

I’d start by cutting right back on the carbs.

no not been tested ill mention today when I go

@LadyCampanulaTottington

You’re eating a huge amount of carbs OP and many times a day. Can you eat a larger meal in one go and eat 3 times rather than 5.

I’d start by cutting right back on the carbs.

It doesnt matter how many times a day I am eating if you notice the calories at the top that are the calories needed for my weight during the second trimester wouldnt make a difference if I ate them all in one meal or in 10 and doesnt matter if theyre carbs or not it matters how many calories.

Where did you get that calorie count from? It's a lot. You do seem to be eating a lot although not enough for such a weight gain.

Definitely ask for a diabetes check. It could be T2. Or even T1 I guess. Definitely needs checking.

I eat when I am hungry if I ignore it I end up with horrific hunger pangs like I woke up with today. The fact my hunger is insane but I eat a great variety of good fats, carbs and proteins means I should have good satiety. I am not filling up on empty calories at all. You wont catch me eating pasta, or anything white. I am not carbphobic I eat what it takes to fill me up so Im not uncomfortable. Im pretty happy with the variety of nutrients in my diet

@MyOtherProfile

Where did you get that calorie count from? It's a lot. You do seem to be eating a lot although not enough for such a weight gain.

Definitely ask for a diabetes check. It could be T2. Or even T1 I guess. Definitely needs checking.

www.freedieting.com/pregnancy-calorie-calculator I understand about BMR basal metabolic rate and for someone heavy they are well higher than someone who isnt and since pregnancy isnt about weight loss I looked for a pregnancy related BMR calculator. It is high but its to maintain my weight not lose any. Like you say I eat what my weight is at I shouldnt be getting bigger. the cals needed for my weight were 1st tri 2260 2nd tri 2460 and third 2650 but thats based on my current weight i was only 16st something when I started so it would have been lower. I have nothing else to gauge my calorie intake on like I say my MW is so unhelpful

I don’t know about your weight gain, but I think the NHS advice is that you don’t need any extra calories/food until the third trimester (and even then it’s just about 200 calories on average). Your food diary seems like a lot of food to me, but I’ve never counted calories so perhaps am mistaken. Can you ask to be referred to a dietitian? Or see one privately?

I had issues with my pelvis/tailbone from before 20 weeks in my first pregnancy and was referred for physio (I am not overweight).

Youre right I do eat alot and its good nutricious food yet I still wake up like Ive not eaten in a week so thats how I know my calorie consumption isnt crazy. I am normally satiated much easier than this and when I really eat healthy to lose weight I am talking about 1600 calories a day they fill me even better than I am now. Its so blooming weird I havent ate like this ever in my entire life skipping a meal is out of the question

@ChanFirstTimer86 it’s important to understand that where your calories come from is as important as how many you have.

Trust me, cut your carbs and fill in the missing calories with protein if you’re afraid of being hungry if you eat less.

@twoofusburningmatches

I don’t know about your weight gain, but I think the NHS advice is that you don’t need any extra calories/food until the third trimester (and even then it’s just about 200 calories on average). Your food diary seems like a lot of food to me, but I’ve never counted calories so perhaps am mistaken. Can you ask to be referred to a dietitian? Or see one privately?

I had issues with my pelvis/tailbone from before 20 weeks in my first pregnancy and was referred for physio (I am not overweight).

basically im nearly 19st and im 5ft1 so my BMR (the amount of calories needed to sustain my existence even before any walking moving etc) is 1803 a day little to no exercise makes it 2163 so that pregnancy calculator added on less than a 100 cals in tri one. If you eat your BMR calories including what you use moving and living etc you stay the same weight if you eat less you lose and if you eat more you gain. It takes 3500 calories to add 1 pound of weight so I am not eating enough extra calories to gain how I am. If youve never counted calories this might all be new to you

[quote LadyCampanulaTottington]@ChanFirstTimer86 it’s important to understand that where your calories come from is as important as how many you have.

Trust me, cut your carbs and fill in the missing calories with protein if you’re afraid of being hungry if you eat less.[/quote]
I dont get what you mean by its important? I eat the calories needed it wouldnt matter where they came from if I eat 2460 a day all protein thats still 2460 it will still have the same effect the point is when people go low carb yes they satiate quicker on smaller amounts because protein more filling than carbs but thats not the issue here I am not trying to lose weight I am trying to just put on normal pregnancy weight if I chose a high protein diet im still gonna eat 2460 cals and my weight will react the same

Sorry OP, that is a huge amount of food. As long as you are getting minerals and vitamins you dont need all those calories.
During the second world war the women in Holland were starving. Interestingly their babies grew normally. i cant lay hands on the data, but I remember being taught about in midwifery school.
You need to get to the bottom of the excessive amount of weeing and possible thyroid issue.

@ChanFirstTimer86 It does matter where they come from because metabolically they are processed differently.

I’m not talking about weight loss I’m trying to help you stop gaining weight.

You seem utterly determined to ignore my advice.