That it's a basic human right for kids to be able to use the toilet at school?

[sorrysaywhatnow]

So, fully prepared to be told I'm being unreasonable, that it's disruptive to other students etc, but if your year 9 daughter has her period and is flooding, surely it's BU for teachers to say you can't use the toilet in lesson time unless you have a medical exemption for bladder problems? She had to sit for the entire lesson, refused permission even when she had to describe the problem to the teacher. I mean, really? I knew it was a new policy that the school had introduced, but I think it's ridiculous.

@Whitestick

No!?.. how is my post ridiculous in any way please?

@AlmostAJillSandwich

I’m so sorry to hear of your experience. I’m not surprised you developed anxiety.

Disgusting. I've advised all my children if they are refused to go to the toilet to walk out of class and I will face the consequences. Nobody should ever have to beg permission to go to the toilet this makes me so angry. Hope your poor DD is ok

@Haggisfish3

Erm loads of people work in jobs that mean they can’t just go to the toilet when they want?! Bus and train drivers, people who work in supermarkets, in factories and warehouses, banks, hospitality…the lost goes on. Learning to control one’s bladder and bowel, and thinking ahead, is an absolutely necessary lesson.

@Haggisfish3

Did you read the post! The child is period flooding, can you advise how you control that please! I am sure lots of us would like to know

@sarah13xx

If I was to say yes every time though I’d be sat in the class talking to myself

A teacher with two grammatical errors in one sentence?

I get that kids take the p...but I find it amazing that girls still have to put up with this. Why should the teaching staff be told they have their period just to get permission to go to the toilet. If it was boys in the same situation a system would have been worked out by now! Not every girl has regular periods straight away, it can take ages to get used to the ebb and flow of it all... How humiliating it must be for the girls... I can't remember what happened when I was at school, but I think a choice between detention or flooding is just s**t!

@TatianaBis incorrect use of a question mark there 😉

@WonderfulYou thank you for that.
As someone who at school who was bullied, the only safe time to go to the toilet was in lessons.

The trouble is that whilst you see it as a fundamental human right, there's also the obligation to keep children safe - which when the toilets are the place for self harm, inappropriate TikToks, calling Mum to get her to make up an emergency appointment because they've not done their homework, vomiting as part of an ED, taking and selling of drugs and general vandalism such as pulling sinks off walls and using the free sanitary towels to create a modern art installation on the wall and block the toilets (didn't make that mistake again - thinking that they would appreciate not having to come and ask somebody for pads was obviously trusting them too much), plus carrying out bullying either in person or by phone so the messages are waiting for the victim as soon as they switch their phone on when they leave the site - well, it's not all about keeping girls in their place, is it? It's about keeping them safe as well as protecting school facilities.

Of course your daughter would never be trying to get out of a lesson or thinking of doing any of those things. But somebody's has to be doing it.

What the honest fuck. Am I the only female here who has a period heavy enough so that I have needed to change my tampons or sanitary pads not in 45 minutes but NOW?

[quote Newbabynewhouse]@Hankunamatata

I know you're just trying to be helful but a young girl shouldnt have to take ibuprofen to stop her period from coming out so that she can keep her teacher happy, thats unhealthy... i phoned in sick to work once as had food poisening and was told i had to come in and to take the medication that clogs you up (forgot what is called now) and i said no, you can't make me take medication ..my body is doing a natural thing that it needs to do..so i will be in when im better![/quote]
You said she is flooding which would overflow any sanitary protection. Gp prescribe medication to help with flooding as a consequence is often anemia. I want suggesting she used medication in place of being allowed to go to the toilet. I'm saying if flooding is an issue then there are things that can be done about it - she doesnt have to suffer the embarrassment of rushing to the toilet because she is flooding

@Whitestick

Do you remember being a 13/14 year old just started their period... would you have out your hand up in class and said "i need to go to the toilet as im bleeding everywhere?" She may have a male teacher and be embarrassed.. she may be shy/anxious or get bullied so doesnt want to say soemthing..

Teachers always say to high school pupils "you're getting ready for the big world now and need to act like adults" but then they say "you're not allowed to go to the toilet incase you throw wet loo roll at the mirrors"

I do think it's againt their rights especially as teen girls have to go though period anxieties so think something needs to be done to allow genuine loo breaks without drawing too much attention to people with special passes...

I think that creating a no toilet in class policy is a bit power hungry yes, i think it screams 'i need to show you i have authority so I'll stop you from.using a toilet '
Most PPs on this thread agree anyway so dont know why you're choosing my post to call ridiculous let me guess tour a strict teacher who needs to enforce this rule to keep conrtol?

Tell her to politely excuse herself and walk out. She should be able to make herself comfortable without having to explain herself infront of the class particularly at such a young age.
She could discreetly explain to the teacher or another female member of staff if she is able and if not she should ask you to contact the school.

[quote sarah13xx]@TatianaBis incorrect use of a question mark there 😉[/quote]
It was a question.

This absolutely boils my piss.

I’ve had this conversation with my DSD. I had actually forgotten that teachers can tell you that you’re not “allowed” to go to the toilet. I told her that if she ever really urgently needed to go, especially on her period that she should get up and walk out of class. I’ll be telling my baby daughter the same when it’s her time. And the school will have to deal with me if they have anything to say about it.

In this instance I would say it’s in contravention of your daughters human rights and she should tell them so. I would say Article 3 applies, the right to be free from inhumane or degrading treatment. Certainly being forced to sit in pools of period blood is degrading and definitely inhumane. And if it’s a female teacher, they should know better.

@NeverDropYourMooncup

And the only solution that anyone can come up with is banning everyone from the bathroom?

This is not the answer.

@Willyoujustbequiet

Formal complaint and ofsted.

Actually think its ripe for a challenge under Equalities Act.

More importantly teach your daughter to stand up and walk out. There is absolutely no justification for refusing a basic human right.

Why is this anything to do with the ‘equalities act? If boys were allowed to go because of their period but not girls, then yes, but as it’s just girls who have periods, they’re not being discriminated o[against in the grounds of equality.

That being said, no girl should be refused permission to use the toilet when she is on her period.

Newbabynewhouse again with the "nasty teacher making up the rules" stuff. Teachers are charged with carrying out school policy. We don't make the policy. I am actually ridiculously kind in terms of allowing children out four in one lesson today and I'd get a lot of grief if management found out but I am not naive enough to ever say we could have a free for all policy.
Have you seen the tiktok trash the school bathrooms videos by the way?

Interesting divergence in this thread is between people who think the worst of children and so want to heavily police them; and people who want to treat them with the same dignity they'd afford their colleagues. I suspect there are very different school cultures in mind motivating these two positions!

(I myself went to a middling school where some kids took the piss, but most did not.)

@sorrysaywhatnow

So, fully prepared to be told I'm being unreasonable, that it's disruptive to other students etc, but if your year 9 daughter has her period and is flooding, surely it's BU for teachers to say you can't use the toilet in lesson time unless you have a medical exemption for bladder problems? She had to sit for the entire lesson, refused permission even when she had to describe the problem to the teacher. I mean, really? I knew it was a new policy that the school had introduced, but I think it's ridiculous.

YANBU how ridiculous and then they wonder why so many girls want to self-identify as boys lol.

@maddy68

Can you explain how you tell your body not to flood when on your period because you can only do that between classes?

Exactly. Shocked by the lack of empathy here.
DD has been told to walk out if she's been refused and I'm happy to take it up with the governors, her periods are an issue and she isn't a trouble maker.

Give over Comtesse - compassion is one of the elements that means I get plenty of kids rocking up for emergency pads, tights, breakfast bars and whatnot. It also means I take safeguarding my pupils seriously. I don’t work in a school where I can guarantee pupil safety if they are not in my class. We lockdown during lessons as much as possible and parents know how to arrange toilet passes if need be. I have had plenty of chats about how to deal with periods. I deal with an unexpected period like I do with vomiting and nose bleeds but these are unusual incidents. Periods are not and unusual and breaks not very far off - they are expected to be manageable. I am expected to keep my pupils safe. The same parents advocating escalating to governors and pulling girls from school would presumably be even more irate if their children were assaulted or given drugs during unsupervised time.

[quote TatianaBis]@NeverDropYourMooncup

And the only solution that anyone can come up with is banning everyone from the bathroom?

This is not the answer.[/quote]
Well, when the alternative is accepting that at some point of the week, somebody will have to call a parent because their child has cut themselves repeatedly, is off their head on drugs or drunk, has taken an unspecified number of paracetamol, is currently on their way to hospital having had the defib deployed or has in some way harmed other kids or caused hundreds of pounds worth of damage, what else is acceptable?

After all, having a rule where a senior member of staff has to come to the classroom to collect and escort them to the toilet, wait for them hope they aren't in there harming themselves/taking substances/taking an overdose, then walk them back to class before doing the same for every other kid doesn't go down well with some parents either.

The answer would be to not have anyone who is psychologically vulnerable, has medical needs, doesn't do drugs and knows not to vandalise, bully or get their phone out once they're in the cubicle in school in the first place, but that's completely wrong and unworkable, too.

I always told my children, if your teacher tells you that you cannot go to the bathroom, you go to the bathroom and tell the teacher to call me and I will take care of it. I bet no one tells the teacher that she can't go to the bathroom when she needs to go. It is insane to me, that a person is told they cannot go use the restroom and your daughters situation.

@Sparklespangle

It's a difficult one. I have been a secondary school teacher and the amount of kids who go out to the toilet because they are bored massively outstrips those who genuinely need to go.

I think there should be some kind of card system for medical reasons including periods but again this is hard to police and would be abused.

Spot on, a female can't/won't tell their teacher what is occurring re her period but were there a system like you e said it would go a long way