Dependent Drinkers and Alcoholics (recovering or active) Support Thread II?

[kokeshi]

Welcome to the thread, the purpose of this is to give anyone, who is having any trouble with their drinking, to come and post about it honestly and without judgement.

There are many of us that use the thread for support and encouragement: some in recovery, others just needing a place to share about their worries. It's been going on in one form of another for a while now and has helped many people.

Everybody's welcome, no matter what stage your drinking is at.

Jump right in, the water's fine

just had a long chat with my best friend (whose ex husband is an alcoholic) and admitted to her that i was worried about telling people i had a problem because that would mean i would have to stop drinking ,that thought alone scared the bejeesus out of me ,thats very very bad thinking in my book.

Hi Justwater- the thought of not drinking scared the shite out of me. I knew I had to stop but I didn't know how to. I hated the thought of never drinking again, so I know how you feel. Its hard to recognise you have a problem, because then you should do something about it- god I remember that feeling of being scared.
Do you have to tell people? Its up to you who you tell, and what you tell them. Its a scary thought process, but you are obviously facing things and that is really brave.
There will be others around tonight too if you want to check in later. See you later?

I'll be here later on too.

Having a really crap day and trying hard to resisit the urges.

Sending gentle hugs and blessings over to you Daisy, and a big hello to JW.

I hadnt planned on running round telling the world ,just the people who really care about me. So far so good ,although if i continue drinking coffee at this rate Im going to be up all night !! Have a caffeine addiction too, coffee and diet coke, ive got the liver of a 60 year old and the bones of a 90 year old and as for my waist ,muffin top pah ! more like farmhouse loaf top!

managed a trip to the garage without purchasing any wine ( or other alcohol) ,wandered over to the booze area as a matter of course and sort of did a double take , like oh im not drinking tonight and moved over to the milk ( im living the dream I am) ,bought a reduced apple pie to cheer myself up !

Well done just water! Fantastic progress! Just wanted to say hi and welcome to the thread, I'll post later. Good to see daisy back again as well. Keep posting folks, let's support each other.

JW

My kids dragged me away from the BWS (beers wine spirits) aisle when I went to my first AA meeting.
LMAO at muffin top / farmhouse loaf.

Your doing well. You say you didn't plan on telling the World...but we care here. So please keep posting. You'll find a wealth of support from the other regulars.

I'm not a fine one to talk. I still drink BUT I have cut down shedloads from the situations I found myself in before Xmas.

Hello to Kokeshi, Teasle, BM and anyone else I've forgotten (((hug)))

DAisy I just wanted to pass on my condolences, it must be so difficult losing your mother. I just can't imagine it. PLease be kind to yourself and use this thread to share about whatever you need to.

Well done to everyone else who is abstaining from drink tonight, it's a real achievement. It takes a lot of strength and courage to admit you have a drink problem, and then do something about it.

HI everyone.
How has your night been JW? I hope you feel ok.

I must shuffle off upstairs now. I have been having quite a few late nights recently- past my usual 9 o'clock bedtime at any rate- enforced by early waking young child, not because I am as dull as ditchwater. I was going to lurk on MN for a bit tonight but got caught in the hypnotic beam of the telly.

Hope everyone is well tonight.

I'm still here if anyone fancies a chat?

Sleep well Teasle x

hey purpleone...I'm here. Supposed to be sorting out the house and packing for going up to Scotland tomorrowe but have done neihter. have drunk bottle and ahalf of red wine instead

feeling really low and a bit shite and really missing my mum . and worrying that at 38 I'm too old to feel like I'm an orphan, but it's kind of fucking my head to think that I have no parents anymore.

I really need to stop drinking.

Darling , Please take good care of yourself, that's all I say.

You know what I think? grieve for your mum instead.

FWIW, my parents chose to stop speaking to me, all because I asked my mum not to smoke in my home. Being a survivor of DV, I am very vocal about my home. Yet they never spoke to me since?

Please don't punish yourself LMD, you are going through a lot right now. I haven't got a clue about the awful shit disease, but I'm just 'here'

Get your stuff packed up and get out of house for a while, worry about the drinking later. I feel you have far too much on your plate to even worry about that right now. Please be easy on yourself hon x x

(((huggles to LMD)))

I know what you mean about the orphan thing LMD, freaks me out too (I'm 26). Makes me feel sooo jealous when people are whinging about parents getting on their nerves or wanting to be involved too much. It still doesn't seem real.

Btw I lost my Mum to cancer last year (dad died 10 years ago) and I also have PND. My drinking this last year has steadily got worse. Hope you have the support for that not to happen. I really know what you are going through, if you want to talk let me know, (I even lived 200 miles away from my mum when she was dying). So sorry for your loss and just take it as it comes.

sorry if I offended anyone with the higher power thing btw, I have nothing against AA at all. All I have to go on is what my sis tells me of AA, honestly I think it's an excuse, she is very intelligent and overanalyses things. But then again, she maybe rejected AA on the only negative point she could find, to start drinking again?

Has anybody had counselling? I'm wondering if it would maybe help me but don't know how to go about getting it [skint emoticon]

Havalina,

I went to my GP 18 months ago for alcohol counselling...guess what? I'm still waiting!

I really need it too and will have to wait on the NHS, too much has happened this past 6 months or so, sunk into heavy drinking, got lectures etc, miss my parents even though they're no good for me. Basically fucked everything up good and proper!

Go see your GP and see what he / she has to offer?

If you pay private to BUPA or alternative healthcare, I'm sure you'd get it a lot quicker?
Although I'm sure that the constant prescriptions for anti d's for the last 5 years (since I left DV) and just GP help have left me in limbo? I have asked pletny of times.

Havalina,

I don't know where you are but there should be some free alcohol(and drug) services in your area.

i work for a free alcohol counselling service and its geting increasingly difficult to get it (all the money going into trendy drug services).

If you say what county you're in I'll have a hunt for a service in your area.

Purpleone - lcoholeast.org.uk offers a free counselling service to residents of Newham, Redbridge and Tower Hamlets.

don't know if this helps. They may have a waiting list but 18 months that you've waited so far is just crazy.

that was www.alcoholeast.org.uk

Hi Havalina,

Welcome back. Many people do find excuses about AA for the exact reason you posted: they're not ready to give up drinking yet.

I know alcohol services vary widely in each area I was thinking that something like The Council on Alcohol. There are regional variations to this in Scotland but they provide one-to-one support to help you figure out what's best for you.

More of our addiction services seem to be communicating with each other up this way, in fact I was in a brand new resource centre today that focussed on addiction and mental health, and worked alongside the community addiction teams, social work services and the coucil on alcohol. I was pretty impressed by it actuall, they're even offering courses on life-skills and aromatherapy sessions! It only opened in October and our local health authority has a really bad track record for cutting services so we'll see how long it lasts I guess.

Is there anything similar down your way? How much are you drinking now and do you realistically think you will be able to get back to 'normal' drinking?

x-posted lauryfairycake. Looks kinda the same thing.

well i did it a whole night alcohol free !!! didnt get chance to come on here because DH got back late and had to feed him. Dont feel fantastically better physically but my head feel s clearer and my house doesnt look like a bombs hit it ,well except for DS room but i just shut that door !

So today im not going to have a drink ,I think the weekend will be the hardest, if i can get past sunday night I will feel like i deserve a medal .

kokeshi do you never sleep ,just noticed time of your last posting !

You did really well JWFMT! MAke sure you plan your weekend so that you have enough to occupy your time with. Treat yourself to something nice during those times you would normally drink, like a long bubble bath, a good film/book/nice food. Also helps to find another kind beverage to have in the place of drink. My DP loves herbal teas (chamomile etc...good for relaxation), I personally think they taste like old dishwater!

If you get a craving, try to figure out what led to it. We're told to look out for these feelings: hungry, angry, lonely or tired (HALT). It's important to remember that the acute phase of the craving, the really peak of anxiety eventually bottoms out if you just wait it out. It'd good practice to keep delaying the time you might drink if it's unbearable. For example, if you think a whole day is too long, break it down into hours, or even minutes. I've done this and it really works. That really intensive anxious phase subsides and it feels like a real triumph. The more you do this, the easier it becomes to resist giving in.

I've mentioned before but it's a really good idea to get to the GP and ask for some vitamin B supplements, (including thiamine) as your stores will be depleted after long-term drinking. These are crucial to normal brain and nerve function, and it will help physically when coming off drink.

PS. No, I don't sleep very much!