Obese but with pretty normal legs / arms etc but very fat, enormous belly ***Ovarian cancer diagnosis - title edited by MNHQ at OP's request***

[TwitterQueen1]

Hi
I'd be glad of any advice or personal experiences here. I am around 4 stone overweight, so definitely obese. Most of it is on my stomach though, which now looks like I'm 11 months pregnant with triplets. I'm in my 50s so this is not a possibility. It's very painful and I am short of breath when I walk etc.

I've put on a lot of weight in a short period - 10lbs in 2 months.

Six months ago I was bodyboarding in the sea, walking every day and doing an exercise class every week. Now it's a struggle to do anything.

I'm having bloods done on Friday but any ideas / comments? Am I just unlucky to pile it all on in one place?

Hope you get a call from the specialist nurse today, TQ.

You can chuck the cards. When I was sick some cards actually made me really angry. Just chuck them if they are annoying you. You have other shit to deal with, like finding the biggest and best packs of cashew nuts you can.
I hope that wherever you are the sun shines a little today.
I hope you get your call.

Thinking of you today

Pimmsy- I love those pictures, can you buy them on cards?

Op - been following this and thinking of you. Hope they come up with a suitable plan of action asap.

@Itscurtainsforyou

Yes you can - emilymcdowell.com/collections/greeting-cards

Best cards - the only ones that made me smile during chemo!

Hi everyone
Still no call. I will wait until tomorrow lunchtime and then ring.

Pimmsy - a friend has just sent me an email about 'whatever journey life takes me on'... I don't know whether to scream, cry or puke. But these people are my dear friends and I know their thoughts are coming from a good place. They still give me the rage though .

My manager has just emailed me "thanks and bets [sic] of luck !!" after I sent her my handover guide. So not impressed.

Am crying a lot in private. I can't bear to think about my girls. Youngest has her 18th in 3 weeks, plus A levels. They have a total dickhead, shithead pathetic excuse for a father.

People are sometimes crap with the best of intentions....as Hermione in Harry Potter said....the emotional range of a teaspoon.
Thinking of you...

Hello Twitter - some people (with the best of intentions) are always on "transmit" rather than "listen". It gives me tooth-grinding rage. But wise people say that they mean well. Shame they don't think first, isn't it? I hope you have a listening friend in real life, but if not, you know where we are...
[hug]

It's difficult though, isn't it? Sometimes knowing what to say that is going to be sensitive enough but still appropriate can be paralysing. At least people have sent cards/said something.

But I totally get why you would have the rage

Hope you don't have to wait too much longer, TQ.

Bless you! I hope it isn't serious. You were so right to see GP.
Keep us posted and remember you have support here.

Adelie I think it is pretty serious, have you rtft?

Twitter I thought of you earlier when I was getting dressed , I had a hospital appointment and somehow ended up trying to put a pair of DD's pants on by mistage . Ample coverage would definitely not have been provided but as I couldn't get them past mid thigh I am unable to report futher. They are the same colour as some of mine and have three holes but that is where all similarities end. Small pants and a hospital appt brought me back to your thread.

Sorry you are still waiting, that is rubbish.

Thought of you today Twitter.
Sorry you are still in a void.
And that your ex is no support, that must be a real concern.

I hope you get your phonecall today, TwitterQueen. You're very gracious, giving them until lunchtime the following day. I'm more of the 'I'll give them until 34 seconds past the indicated time in case our watches weren't synced properly......'. Terribly impatient.

Hope you ok Twitter - I'd be chasing them

I had ovarian cancer 2 years ago and live to tell the tale 😀

I'm so sorry to hear your news Twitter

Just a thought - if you haven't already done so, it might be worth making sure your dd's school tells the exam boards. They often give special dispensation, or at least take circumstances into account, when awarding grades to students who are having a difficult time.

Always better to do it in advance, in case she really falls apart before an exam or something. And I'm sorry if this is unwanted advice or is too intrusive.

And I'm also amazed at the cashew revelation! I had no idea!

Barchester laughing at image of you struggling with the knickers. It's so not dignified....
NotaPizza glad to hear you're alive and kicking!
Lapin thanks - have told the school and did also mention exam boards. I will chase that up in a few weeks. I should also try to contact DD's uni people too - she has 2nd year exams coming up.

Have rung nurse specialist twice - no reply.

Sorry you are still waiting Twitter.

Good advice from Lapin. How are your DDs?

I am having another X-ray today and having another pant related drama. I knew they were inside out when I put them on and couldn't be bothered to take them off again - waist up X-ray, hopefully the lights will be dim, I will get to keep my trousers on and it will not carried out by a handsome young man with an eye for these things.

De-lurking to say how shit this is.

I think too when someone gets bad news that a lot of people just go into mindless optimism mode. My DH did this with his DF when he got a cancer diagnosis - nothing but the most optimistic prognosis or discussion ever passed his lips. I know it was a) because he couldn't face any other outcome, and b) because he wanted to be really upbeat and positive for his dad, but it did make me wonder if his dad would've liked to have had other conversations, possibly more honest or heartfelt ones.

Sorry you're still waiting to speak to the specialist nurse OP and hope you get to speak to her today. It's horrible being in limbo.

I hope you get your call soon. Uncertainty is the worst. Once you know what sauce you're going to be cooked in you can start planning. I always find planning calming.

Am trying to say fluffiphlox out loud..... tricky [winkl]

I finally got the call. Good and bad news. The good is that they will start me with chemo as an outpatient, but my oncologist appointment is not until 31st and I'm not likely to start chemo until mid-April. This seems a long time to wait to me.

The bad news is that the stomach is definitely affected so we're at stage 3. They don't know about the liver and lungs yet as they didn't test, if they are affected it's stage 4.

There are lesions / cysts on the liver but this doesn't necessarily mean anything. Anyone can have harmless cysts for decades.

The mass - or melon - as the nurse described it, measures 23 x 20 x 14. So it's definitely a beast.

I don't know what to do about work now - I need to contact HR. I don't want to 'spend' 3 weeks of my 20 weeks' sick leave waiting for treatment to start. And I'm currently fit enough to work.

I feel better for knowing, but frustrated I have to wait so long. And the fluid is just going to build up again...

Glad you know something at last. Three weeks does seem like too long to wait, a bloody long time. Sorry it isn't better news.

I am a bit surprised that you didn't have a 1 to 1 with a consultant for this sort of news.

Can you propose to do less than your normal hours, work as you feel like it for the next few weeks. It would be nice if HR would let you choose what to do, you might wake up mentally floored by it one day and want to spend a day at home eating nuts.

I would be frustrated (and everything else) too.

You sound together TQ, now you can start planning for the weeks/months ahead.

I hope your workplace are decent with you.
Unfortunately I have nothing I can say to help, but I did find this interesting video on cashew nuts. It's not 3 weeks long, but It will fill 5 minutes.

Take care