Anyone treated depression themselves?

[essbee]

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essbee there ia thread onmeditation on philoophy/religion board with some hints to try you do not need to spend money

Have a look at magnesium deficiency as most women are lacking at it can cause allsorts of problems including depression. It's v cheap and worth a try. Ask your GP first though if you're goin to try it

Hi essbee. I had some fantastic and very helpful advice when I posted back in January asking for strategies to avoid depression. It's here , there might be something there that helps. You've achieved amazing things in the last year but it's all been stressful, difficult stuff and it's not surprising if it's taken its toll. Sometimes it's when you stop that these things can overwhelm you. Anyway, please don't feel bad about admitting that you might be depressed, I do kwym but there's no shame in it, there really isn't. Recognising it is an important first step, so good for you. That really doesn't sound like a lot of sleep, no wonder you're not feeling great - that alone would fell most of us. Thinking of you and hoping you find whatever works for you. If you have a nice GP could you at least talk to him/her and see what they suggest? They might have some counselling available attached to the surgery, you never know.

When I suffered from depression I found a few things worked well with me.

• a tape of all your favourite, upbeat, tracks. Play it in the morning as you make breakfast to put you in a good mood for the day.
• plan something you enjoy doing for a few weeks in advance, like a night out or something, this gives you something to look forward to.
• when you have a good day, write it down, what made it good, how it felt, etc. Then when you have a bad day, it helps to read about your good days as it's so easy to forget that you ever felt anything but depressed!
• get a good book, I find anything by Libby Purves good, just to get stuck in and take you away from your current situation.
• rent a funny, feel-good movie 'It's a wonderful life' is recommended by many. Watch it before you go to bed so that you go to sleep on a high note.
• treat yourself to something nice at least once a week. Even if it's just a new lipstick, or a haircut, something to make you feel good about yourself.

Hope these few hints work. Good luck.

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I've suffered from clinical depression in the past. Nowdays I can spot it coming on and have strategies that work. Can I stress though that these work for me, they may not for you.

1. Work. Believe it or not, I find work a good antidote for depression, which is slightly strange given that I work in a high stress job. However, it's the senso of self worth it gives me that is useful with the depression. Having said that, I find the occasional 'duvet day' good for calming the worst of the wobbles.

2. Exercise. There's a lot of research that backs this one up. Practically I know it can be difficult, I manage to fit it in by cycling to work. I also find aggressive sports really useful for working off anger. 20 minutes visualising the face of the work bully on a squash ball does wonders for my equilibrium.

3. Me time. A couple of hours on my own where I don't have to justify where I am or what I'm doing. It could be shopping, reading or surfing the net, as long as it is understood that it is MY time and I am not to be disturbed.

I think the best thing is to try lots of things until you work out what works best for you. Good luck.

I so agree with slug about exercise essbee. For me it's just walking in the woods but I find it really lifts my mood.

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ive had depression for as long as i can remember but it comes and goes. doesnt take much to set it off. i had joined here when i first got pg but never really came here after that until i had dd. i was bad after that. my world had suddenly been turned upside down and i was sinking deeper and deeper. i was a gibbering wreck most of the time. my gp prescribed me new tablets but im going to admit something now that i havent told anyone. i didnt take them because i wanted to drink. a lot. i sat here every night drinking. i started to have the odd glass of wine earlier and earlier. soon i was starting at tea time and really drinking when the children were in bed. i was never bad enough to not be capable of looking after them but my head was frazzled. i didnt WANT to get better, i wanted someone to take notice and realise how bad i was. i just wanted to curl up and sleep, or dissapear so people would come looking for me. one night i sat here and counted out the paracetamol in front of me. i put them in little rows and i imagined what everyone's life would be like without me. then something snapped. i didnt WANT to be like this anymore. id got to the lowest i could go and there were only two options left, sort myself out or finish it. well i wasnt going to leave my kids without a mummy so i had to sort my head out. the only thing i can really put it down to was positive thinking and wanting to get better, not just pretending to be. acceptance was also a huge issue for me. once i accepted that this was my life now and there was no going back then i could really get on with it. i stopped the drinking apart from nights out and it wasnt hard at all (strange because at the time i really thought i was addicted), and although i still have these sleepless nights im not really depressed now, maybe just a little down, nothing major. i surpose what im trying to say is that you have to really want to get better otherwise you've lost the battle before its begun.

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Essbee, hope you are feeling at least a bit better, I have had some years with depression, first I though it was pure nostalgia from leaving my country, then I though it might be SAD, after birth it was PND, etc. The main problem was that there were so many things that depressed me that it was difficult to concentrate in solving one at a time.

I have had prozac for some time (it was great but the effect weared of after sometime) then I had St John's wort (made me feel very agresive, so I won't recommend it openly eventhough I know it has been great for other people), tried theraphy, trips home, etc.

Somebody recommended me Australian flower remedies (similar to BAch remedies) because I was not able to concentrate/focus on things, so even though I found most alternative therapies very simmilar to placebos I gave it a go. I found it really difficult not to laugh at the guy at the shop, or better said at his questions, but the flower essence mix he prescribed and prepared has been wonderful, it's unbelievable. It probably helped me to focus my attention in what I really wanted rather than finding make-do's or subsitutes which didn't make me really happy, at the end I have understand that I don't need AD to soothe my pain, I need to change what makes me unhappy, so... I'm taking steps to go back to my country. Why am I saying this here I don't know, but hope you find it helpful

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Esbee, can you start with just one single thing from your old life, and once is sorted concentrate in getting back another little piece?

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Essbee, I'm really really sorry you are feeling bad.
My suggestions are that you first make a list with things on it that make you (genuinely happy on one side (ie things that really lift you, not those that just mask it or make you feel happy and then crap), and then put all things that drag you down on the other. Think of as many as you can - include people who are uppers and those who are downers. Then look at how you divide your time. I wouldn't be surprised if you spent most of your time doing stuff and seeing people on the 'downer' list. The idea is to shift this and start doing stuff on the UP list. In order to do this, think specifically about what you'd like to do more of - be as specific as you possibly can. ie I would like to go the gym twice a week, and then brainstorm any ideas - no matter how mad - to get you to that target. Could you do a childcare swap with a friend? Is there a creche? Just think of anything even if you think it sounds crazy. Don't waste your time thinking of all the reasons why you can't do X or Y, just focus on finding solutions.
You have real problems atm, so I'm not surprised you feel down. You can't make getting divorced pleasant so it will be quite grim for a bit, but if you really really want to stay in the house, why not do a bit of brainstorming to find solutions to that? And if you decide the price is too high, brainstorm ways of staying close to your friends. As for work, I think you need to - yes, again! Brainstorm ideas to make your workload more tolerable. Think about what are your key problems and think of solutions. Then if there are things that need to change, ask your boss for a meeting and talk about them with him/her. You shouldn't have to take work home all the time and feel so defeated by your job. What do you think is the problem with work?

essbee, it must be really hard to contemplate moving away from the area you love. Your statement "I want my old life back but I can't have it, it's gone" encompasses so much pain, it seems to me.

I agree with Aloha - can you brainstorm ways of staying in your house? I wonder if janster can help you - doesn't she know a lot about property management? Can you rent out any of your rooms? can you move to another house in the same area and rent out rooms?

I made the move away from a 'nice' area full of my friends to much less nice area full of strangers. It was a wrench to leave things, but the plus side outweighted the minus side: our house was much more suitable for a family and by far the best thing of all - selling up enabled us to pay off debts and get ourselves back on an even keel financially. It was an utter relief. It far outweighed the reality of moving to a 'downmarket' area. And also, our upmarket area was getting more and more full of single, relatively properous people. My lifestyle and finances were so different,I was beginning to feel a stranger in my area long before we left it. I hated keeping up appearances and witnessing my neighbours spending money like water while I was scrimping and saving. It just rubbed salt into the wounds.

While fighting to stay in your present house, can you look around to see what sort of place you could get if you move? really look into the areas you'd move to, get lots of details. You might begin to build a good picture of what your new life could be like. It seems to me ( could be wrong of cours) you are in need of a plan for the future - something to look forward to. You have a huge amount of changes happening to you. Some are just going to be beyond your control. When this has happened to me it's the hardest thing to accept you can't control things, but sometimes you have to. Hang on in there, things are moving, and somehow soon you'll see where you want to be.

I hope you manage to sleep better, too. Lack of sleep is such a downer. There's been some great advice on here, hope it helps you.

well im up late tonight again but thats due to having a friend here all night! essbee your post worries me because if you are feeling like i did then thats not good. you need help with this. does anyone you know understand what you're going through? i know that many people dont. my one friend told me to snap out of it which doesnt help...it made me worse if anything because it gave me that "f**k you" attitude. i dont know your situation too well but i would say you have a problem with acceptance too? i know its damn hard and i may sound harsh saying this but believe me its not that way. your life has changed and things may seem bleak but it WILL get better...if not the circumstances then your state of mind. you have to make something positive out of crap. thats how it is because if you dont, you will fall deeper and deeper into this. if you want to get better then that is good but it doesnt happen overnight. i wish i could wave a magic wand for you and make things better but when you're feeling like this no-one really can. if you want to talk to me essbee then feel free to contact me. dont worry about piling your stuff on other people because thats what you need to do. if i can help anyone then i will because at times i needed saving from myself and complete strangers were the ones who listened. friends are lovely but they can only know from experience and if they havent had the same then they cant really help. hoping that your ok and like i said, please contact me if you want. i cant improve your situation but im always willing to listen. xx

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Just seen this, I wish I could get over to you but dh working & bringing dd wouldn't be helpful to you.

Hope someone else sees it soon & can help.

Bump

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You have new mail

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