**Tamoxigang counting down to Easter eggs- thread 48**

[BetsyBoop]

throws some hot cross buns on the trolley

oh no , Really have they mucked up again?

wine today was just one big cock up! Which ended with me bursting into tears in two different hospital clinics! Wow I'll be breaking records soon!

I'm off for a nice bath and a calm down, then I will tell all. None of you will believe the lack of communication in this bloody hospital!

Takes a deep breath and counts to 10000000000000! That should just about do it!

Sorry you've had another frustrating day really. They are useless ! Bath a good idea :)

Honey glad DF is healing well

I'm knackered is it bed time yet ?

Really- hope the bath helps you to relax a little.
Honey- good news about your dad and how he is healing.
Malt- glad it went well, was it a PPM meeting?

Have next chemo tomorrow and am putting off doing a huge ironing pile. Trying to get house ready for me not doing much. Hope everyone has a nice evening.

Sorry you've had a bad day really come and rant when you've had a nice bath,
maltes early night for you!
Talking of tiredness, why does radiotherapy make you so knackered?!
DF cut the grass today, only a small patch with an electric mower, it wiped him out and he had to have a sleep afterwards, it was only 10am

So my day was supposed to be....

Rads at 9.15
Oncologist Appt 9.45
CT scan in radiotherapy department at 12!!

So I arrived at the hospital at 9, went up to the Oncologist clinic and told them that I would probably be late for my appt due to Rads! Receptionist said no problem I will make a note and just check in again when you get back!

Rads machine was being calibrated when I arrived, so had to wait until 9.40 before I went in! So not too bad! Rads done and out of there by 10.10

Back to the other Clinic by 10.15 and waited in queue til 10.20 to book in again! Was told to take a seat! 1.5hrs later I am still waiting! Now I have a problem, my CT is back in Radiotherapy department at 12. So ten minutes time. I go to tell the staff that I need to go and could I come back when it's done or should I just make another appt?!

Nurse told me I was next to go in?! I explained I needed to go to the CT scan, she kept repeating but your next! Then my oncologist came out and asked what the problem was, I explained, through the tears he said it was an important scan and I should go and come back IF there was time afterwards. At this point I am emotional, tired and fed up!

Arrive back in Rads unit, go to check in. They don't have anything on their computer She tries calling the CT room but no answer. So could you sit and wait! I sat and cried! Then one of the ladies I met during treatment came in, so we had a good moan together!

45mins later I decide I should go and ask IF this scan is ever going to happen! They call the CT people, they don't have any appt for me. So they call the Rads people. Then one of the Radiographers comes out.

She tells me that I don't need a CT scan?! Apparently the CT scan appt that was on my appt list, wasn't meant to be for me? Its an appt where the docs discuss the previous scans to decide how many boosts I need! It shouldn't of been on my sheet! I am now soooooo pissed off and emotional, so get ushered to a side room. Then I was just beside myself, you know when you just reach a point when you can't take anymore?

I explained that I had missed my oncologist appt, she said she could call and see if they could get me straight in to see the oncologist. But I told her I just couldn't, I didn't want to see anyone now, I just wanted to go home! She said they would rearrange the appt with Oncologist for next week!

She was VERY apologetic, but like I said to her this isn't the first cock up, and I just can't deal with anymore! I can't believe that a hospital can have such a lack of communication!

So finally left the unit at 1.15! Then had to race home before going to collect my youngest charge from a friends!

Sorry that was so long! So is it me? Am I doing something wrong? Or are they just useless!?

Oh really, it's so not you! You couldn't make up how crap they have been. ((hugs))

Argh really so frustrating!

Had a touch of food poisoning last night so spent all day in bed today (and in the loo!). I'm so glad my DM lives close as she's been a Godsend in looking after DD for me. Feeling a bit better today and am hoping I can actually make it out tomorrow for a walk and errands.

Thats rotten BishB on top of everything else. Hope you feel better in the morning

really what an awful day,seems so unfair after all you've been through. Dont let them get you down, onwards and upwards (((hugs)))

really that was definitely worth the full length of your very impressive aargh. Crap in all possible directions. Frankly I think you're doing well if you're just bursting into tears rather than hitting someone.

Sorry about the food poisoning, bishb. That's not going to help you feel better.

Malt, it was my bedtime some time ago, but I'd forgotten I'd had steroids, which now have me bouncing off walls. Boring.

wren hope you managed to get some sleep.

speedy good luck with your Chemo today! That'll be one more ticked off.

malt I'm glad your meeting went okay! Hope you had a good nights sleep.

foofoo well done on getting PICC line and practising your language skills! Least it gave you something else to think about!

Bish sorry to hear you weren't well. Hope you feel a bit better and stronger today xx

honey I think the tiredness is from the constant trips to hospital. Plus the Rads are destroying good and bad cells, so your body is working hard to repair the good cells. Plus your DF is running on empty after not being able to eat properly. Think how tired you feel after a simple sickness bug!? It affects everyone differently. I find I am okay, and still running around after the children. BUT every so often, normally Saturday or Sunday I feel overwhelmingly tired and need an afternoon snooze! Your DF is doing the right thing, listening to his body, so don't worry xx

I have been awake and in tears for the last half hour! I'm dreading going back there!! Trying to think positively! Today is number 25!! So it could be my last session with the ABC machine!! Then I just have to hold it together for the last few boosts!

Hope everyone has a good day! Not long now till the long weekend xx

Yes, we haven't heard from pickle since she said they were due to start the chemo. Hope you're ok, pickle!

really, sending you hugs and a hand to hold today. Might have to reach across from my chemo chair where I'll be having tax no.2.

Annoyed with the rain. I was going to use my pre chemo/ steroid boosted energy to plant the plants I couldn't get to yesterday because too much time was taken up in a 2.5 hr hospital visit just for a line check (new, rubbish system in place. Massive queues). And now it's too wet. And soon I'll be too tired and achy. Sorry - small stuff, I know, but just hanging on to some feel of my own life. Ds2 (14) was in tears yesterday and needed a lot of hugging. He's a very open person, and talked about how worried he was and about how he was getting superstitious about things - "if this happens, she'll be ok", sort of thing. Poor kid. If he's feeling like that, the others will be too. They just won't be talking about it.

Hi All. really hope the appointment was more bearable today, have you heard if this is your last one before boosts?
wren, speedy and anyone else with chemo treatment this week - best of luck and hope SE are manageable.
wee on the node clearance front - my restriction is more to do with lifting my arm above my head, as long as your little one doesn't weigh several stone and the pushchair is fairly manaveourable, then I would hope you could be going the school run after a couple of weeks. Will probably wipe you out though, as your body will be working hard to repair itself. Also, of course, we are all different. I still have quite restricted upwards movement in my arm despite using it pretty much normally from day one, but never lost any movement in terms of behind my back (could still do up a bra strap if I needed one) and forwards. Had to have my drain in for a week on that side as well (only 1 day on the breast removal side).
I am still in limbo waiting to start with oncology department. I go back to work for the interim on Tuesday. Will miss my afternoon naps but work have been so good, probably wouldn't say anything if I catch 40 winks at my desk.

bish hope you are feeling better. You really don't need any sort of tummy issue on top of everything else.
malt glad it went well and not surprised you were shattered afterwards. Another notch on the path to normality.
foo picc line covers on Etsy? How intriguing - off to google straight way. I really don't know much about the chemo treatment - think god for you lot. I hadn't even realised that I would have a line in for the duration until I read this thread. It is quite important as I hope to be performing in a play during the treatment and I will need to make sure that the costume is long sleeved. Luckily set at Christmas in the 80's so shouldn't be a problem.

Ready to go. Emend taken and fingers crossed it works.

Would like to make a comment to everyone but feeling wobbly right now.

Hugs to all

bigger buns, you may not need a line but certain chemo drugs are tough on the veins and as you get older its harder to keep finding new veins to use. I'm happy to have a line rather than struggling with a cannula each time. Long sleeves are definitely helpful!
speedy, I'm just back from chemo: 5/6 down. Good luck and I hope the emend works it's magic. Hope the wobbliness eases!

Hope everyone is coping well with treatments this week.

I can understand your frustration Really

Now that the chemo fog is starting to clear I need to get in touch with BCN.

I was told originally by Onc that I would be having first Herceptin injection with my 5th FEC. When I asked last week at my appointment if I would see her again next time before the injection she said no and also said she didn't have my notes!? So while having my chemo I asked nurse about Herceptin injection and she said there is no way I would have it along with FEC as it is too harsh on heart and would have a CT scan before hand As you can understand I now don't have a clue what is going on. I have had a fantastic consultant/surgeon and BCN but now losing faith in my Onc

I was also asked if I wanted to take part in the Herceptin trial, when I was originally told I couldn't because I was bilateral. How are we meant to trust these people when they don't have a clue themselves?

Glad I got that off my chest

mummywheel, that is not reassuring. I'm so sorry that you're losing faith in your onc - definitely someone you want to believe in. I hope you get some clear answers and some leadership in your care soon.

Apologies I should have said ECG and not CT scan.

I get the feeling that because I'm "coping well" with not too many SE's so far I'm less of a priority and rushed through.

Hope you don't mind me asking but did you get another period Wren? I've had two since starting chemo but no sign of this one.

Hi all.....

So I spoke to Radiologist in charge today (the nice lady) She was not impressed to hear about what happened yesterday. I also had a few comments about a couple of her, shall we say not so caring staff!

Anyway today was the last day for using the ABC machine! No more nose clip and snorkel for me I now have 5 boosts to go! So I SHOULD be all done by next Friday!!

Tomorrow I go to other hospital for Rads, appt was 8.30 BUT had a call to say the paperwork hadn't been done, or sent to them so there was no point going early. So could I go at 4.30!!!!! No way!!!! I have a train booked to go home to my parents for the weekend, and I seriously NEED a break away from all this! So spoke to someone else, who said if I get there around 8.45 and am happy to wait (something I'm used too) she would do my Rads as soon as the paperwork was signed off!

So the big question is, do I get my hopes up and assume I will be sitting on a train home to my parents by lunchtime? Or do I go expecting the worse and not getting seen til the afternoon?!

wren and speedy I hope the Chemo went okay, and you are both home and resting now xx

mummywheel I am sorry you have lost faith in your oncologist! You might of gathered from my posts that I have pretty much lost faith in the whole system! BUT the one person I do trust is my BCN she is the one person who seems to care about me! Not just the Cancer! IF you have a good BCN I would discuss how you are feeling with her xxx

Hope the chemo went well wren and speedy.

Mummywheel, goodness, not reassuring at all. Can you insist more on a proper meeting about this with them?

reallyreally woohoo for next Friday :) How long do you think you might have to wait tomorrow morning? Gosh, anxious times. I too would be desperate to get away as soon as possible. How far away is your parents' home and could you take alternative transport (taxi, lift, parent comes to you and takes you, later train...)?

Hi all
Hugs to those who need them
Really I hope you get seen quickly tomorrow and I'm glad you had the chance to say your piece today

Mummy wheel sorry you've had a frustrating time

Speedy and wren hope chemo went ok

Speedy it was a moderation meeting, we're being moderated next month

A year today I was diagnosed, not sure how to feel about it really but glad that year is over !

Hi mommywheel, I was trying to work this out yesterday as it happens. I reckon I've just had the one period after my first chemo and nothing since (now on no. 5). So that suggests something has definitely ground to a halt. Bit relieved to be honest as I'm ER+ve and feel happier with fewer hormones sloshing around.

Chemo went fine, thanks for asking, bishbe and really. I had a nice friend come today - DH at a funeral in very remote north wales- who did a little bit of healing for me as well, which made me feel cared for. I like the way that tax doesn't kick in straightaway, so I can look after the kids tonight.