Tamoxigang New Year, New Thread, *46*

[BetsyBoop]

Hands round a for everyone.

goodness and really i'm squeezing. thinking of you both x

You need more oxynorm goodness.

Really lots of love - it's horrid but I would imagine the very worst is they think chemo has done enough and that's it ( am I right in thinking you are not done?). If just finished then scan is to see where you are - as it was all ok and you have had chemo, it's more proof that the naughty cells are well and truly on the naughty step for good.

But I know your mind is doing worst case as mine always does so just sending you hugs.

last bit of chemo on round 5 today (promised goodness a cold cap pic) - they will take ages as I need iron infusion. But it's worth it as I feel so much better.

I'm finally doing my echocardiogram today, which kept getting rescheduled. It was supposed to be done pre-chemo, and I've just completed by 6th chemo.

I'm pretty sure my heart is in good condition, so not worried.

really, thinking of you today, you really are tremendously strong to keep working with all this going on.
For the first time since chemo started, I'm writing this in my bed. Have a horrible cough, DD was up at stupid times all night and I've got bone ache - whether from the Paclitaxel or the white cell boosting jabs I don't know. Having said that, the tax is soooo much better than FEC so far. No nausea, no bad taste in mouth. I feel almost normal, apart from the sodding cough!

pickle, a bit belatedly picking up on your comment about still no chemo date. Unbelievably frustrating. Are you badgering them?

Sorry about the cough, wee. Bed sounds like a good place.

Still thinking of you, really; your appt must be soon.

At hospital now...... Should be going in shortly!!!

Already had a complete meltdown so been put in a room by myself (so I don't scare other patients) nurse was very sweet, even brought me a cup of tea, but I can't drink it, as I feel sooooo sick

I just want to finish and get back to work! Xxx

Ah really, hang tight girl. Grip our hands tightly!

Thinking of you.

goodness - things sound very traumatic for you at the minute. I hope the outcome is good and that you get the bugger sorted once and for all.

really - sending you lots of good thoughts and luck for today.

xx

hopefully you are all done now really - I hope you get your results ASAP as waiting is the pits, fingers crossed for good results

goodness - hope you get your results soon too. Honestly whatever the results, it's better than the waiting, with your stomach in knots and your mind being in overdrive with all the "what ifs".

I love the idea of naughty cancer cells being put on the naughty step. I'm still waiting for an admission date. I had a blood transfusion yesterday at the hospital where I'm supposed to be admitted and it was like the Keystone Kops were in charge. Incompetent verging on dangerous (I had to point out to nurse that I'd rather not have air bubbles in my blood line). I'm hoping it won't be the same nursing staff in the ward.

Consultant called yesterday and said the only way I could guarantee an admission date and edible food would be to go private (although my room would be in the NHS bit). Seems ridiculous to pay £thousands for a meal I can identify. Not overly worried about food as I will have a fridge in my room which means I can live on cereal and sandwiches. I'm about 4 stone more than I would like so I can put up with some weight loss.

Goodness I hope they sort out your meds. I had an orthapedic op a few years ago and it was really difficult getting the pain relief right. Make sure you get something to help with the constipation. Lactulose should help and is gentle but effective.

Really hope it went quickly for you and that work is helping you wait for you results

Goodness hope you are in less pain now

Pickle that's not very reassuring is it :( hope you get a date soon

Gigs I hope the chemo and iron infusion went well, would love to see you in your cold cap too they're so attractive aren't they !

Love to everyone else

Have just got a phone call from hospital. Hickman line scheduled for Monday and admission on Wednesday. Gulp. I have a lot of shopping to do this weekend as I only own one pair of PJs, no slippers and no 'leisurewear'.

Apparently I will feel a bit nauseous and 'very bored' the first 10 days and after that will be too knackered to feel anything. Means I will have the option of working from home whilst in hospital, which may be something I want to consider to keep myself away from daytime tv!

On phone so brief post

still at hospital. Felt really light headed during scan, nurse said to take deep breaths and i'd be okay! Obviously thought i was a drama queen after all my tears in the waiting room.

Got up from scan and next thing I know I'm surrounded by worried looking staff with a huge lump on my forehead and a bloody nose.

I passed out and apparently landed face down on the floor! Not a good day! Catch up later if they let me escape! Xx

really I hope you are ok. I'm not surprised you fainted. I hate scans and tend to sob throughout except when told to hold my breath.

Great you've got the date now, pickle, even if the experience won't be much fun. And good luck with that shopping: it definitely helps to have the right gear.

Cross post with really. That sounds like a proper 100% faint (I faint nowadays - post diagnosis- but it's a weedier version that gives me time to sit down). Just shows the sheer stress you are under. I know it's very hard to take time off work, but would a day in bed help? Or would it just make the anxiety of waiting that much worse? Sending you a in any case.

really you are certainly going through it aren't you, I hope everything is ok and you soon feel better
goodness hand holding for you too, thinking about you all,
News update with DF's vocal cord cancer story, has now had CT scan and MD meeting and have decided on a course of radiotherapy, could do surgery but then he wouldnt have any voice atall, whereas with radiotherapy he will still have some sort of voice,
Anyone have any tips on coping with radiotherapy? they have said worse case scenario, feeding tube as throat will be extremely sore, and dry mouth etc.?

Oh really big hugs I'm not surprised you fainted, I hope they're looking after you well. Do you think you ought to tell someone so they can come and look after you ?

Pickle I'm glad you have a date and can start organising stuff, hugs for you too though

Honey I haven't had radiotherapy yet I start next week but best wishes and I bet someone else will be able to help

Hello ladies, may I join you all?

Was referred to the breast clinic today, was there 6 months ago due to the same symptoms but was fobbed off with a 'your breast is normal and I would recommend a plastic surgeon has a look' my left boob has grown considerably in the weeks leading up to my first appointment and is still getting bigger :( no specific lump but it feels lumpy iykwim, my nipple has changed (pulled to the left) have a thickened area at the top of my breast which is more prominent when I raise my arms and when I bend over the my nipple and areola look as if they have moved to the left.

I left the GP in a bit of a daze tbh and forgot to ask if it'll be a two week referral of a routine six week one. My whole boob feels heavy and achy down the left side too, praying for cysts etc.

Have been reading through all the posts and would like to tell you all that I admire all of your bravery and the huge support you all give to each other! Two more hands here to add :)

Welcome wooly :) they usually refer all breast lumps to be seen within 2 weeks so don't panic if your appointment comes through quickly. Did you have mammogram or anything last time you went ? I know lots of people who have been to the clinic and been fine so fingers crossed you will be too, you're very welcome to wait with us

No tests the last time, I'm 34 so a mammogram wouldn't really be useful. The change in shape and size suggests there is something going on, not necessarily a sin ester something mind you but I'd still like to get to the bottom of it.

A referral to the plastics team is pretty pointless when the damn thing is still growing. I've had a complete hysterectomy so it's not hormonal (came off hrt to see if that would help but nope) Trying to be positive, I'll know soon enough.

Thanks for the welcome!

Welcome wooly hope your appointment comes through soon!

I'm back home and tucked up in bed! My head feels like I have been smacked with a sledgehammer! Oh and my face resembles a panda! Taking arnica in the hope it will help!

Other than that I feel embarrassed and a bit pathetic! Although I did tell them that I felt dizzy and odd! I have tomorrow morning off anyway as I have appointment with the Oncologist. But as I am now getting these results as well, I am going to take the day off! Either to give myself time for bad news to sink in, OR time to go for a coffee and celebrate good news! (think it'll be an emotional day, whatever the results)

Thanks for all the hand holding today. It helped Think tonight is going to be a long night! Might need a few hands tomorrow as well!! Xxx

Good luck really hope you will be celebrating tomorrow

Glad you've got a day off tomorrow, really. Fingers crossed for the coffee and the celebration, but we'll be here either way.

Welcome, wooly. Might it be worth checking with the gp that you are on the fast track referral? Definitely should be, but waiting is horrible, and somehow worse if you don't know if its two weeks or six.

-honey, I hope a plan feels like progress for you both. Is it a long radiotherapy course?

really - you are NOT pathetic, you're worried like the rest of us. Keeping everything crossed for your scan result.

wooly - the waiting for everything is hard. As malteserzz says, pretty much all breast lumps are referred as a 2ww, so hopefully your appt will be soon. It's totally natural to be worried so if you have low moments, please know you're not alone and you can vent here all you want with no judgement.