Tamoxigang New Year, New Thread, *46*

[BetsyBoop]

Hands round a for everyone.

Malt - well it was OK . As i said before she is not that enthusiastic about school work but in fact she had really good comments in all subjects except Maths and Biology. Maths was due to the latest test but the teacher thought it was just a blip as previously she has done really well and in Biology the teacher said she was fine but her feeling was she good be doing better - in fact that sums up my view - she is always fine but I'm not sure the teachers realise how little effort she puts in. Also good news was that the 3 options choices she made were all really enthusiastic to have (she does try hard in those subjects).

And my proud moment - DS (and his mate) came 4th in the regional primary maths challenge yesterday. As usual the winners were the host school (had the same when he did the spelling challenge) but 4th was great especially as they did no practice or preparation for the type of questions. He's not like DD - he puts 100% into everything and believes that he should be aiming to get 100% in all tests and exams. (DD thinks not coming bottom is an acceptable approach!!)

oh and are you going to try a different shade on your hair after speaking to your hairdresser?

worried i'm the same as your friend. really want some kind of scan/double check but at the moment, with the results we have, it's not being offered. will know more on Friday when my full histology of this lump is offered.
updating were your nodes all clear?

I'm doing ok post op. in a bit of pain but more discomfort than pain really. bit tricky to get comfy in bed but nothing compared to goodness. still a bit wiped out from anaesthetic.

felt the hospital was a bit crap with discharge. the nurse i saw knew nothing about anything breasty (should i have exercises to do? should I wear the sports bra i was told to buy now, 24-hours). she said call my BCN, I've emailed her and not heard back. will call later today if I still don't hear. I was so wobbly i could barely walk and left with a sick bucket in my hands...piled into a taxi, felt so rough. was the morphine and codeine both of which i'm off now, but they literally locked the door after i walked out at 7pm...couldn't wait to see the back of me!

harriet that does sound like a rubbish discharge: so sorry, and I hope that you're making steady progress now. My BCN said to wear a supportive bra straightaway as the lumpectomy breast would swell to fill whatever space it had. This proved true. General anaesthetic knocks me out - about 4-5 days for it to leave the system after that op. Morphine and codeine don't help. Good luck.

I hope I haven't caused confusion, I think you would only get the mets talk if it looked likely that you had a spread, which I potentially do. So don't worry if you don't have it. (And if it is not in your lymph nodes, it can't have gone anywhere else, remember Amber's Pope in the ensuite comment that had us all laughing! )

Also the letters that I see are copies from my Oncologist and Consultant to my GP and from my Oncologist and Consultant to each other.

{{{Hugs}}} for Really. Yes, it is shit when your friends behave in this way. Would you be comfortable confronting them about it and explaining how it makes you feel? As Malt says you have all of us here. x

Have to run out the door now, as I have chemo in 20 minutes. Will be back later or tomorrow to catch up.

Kitkat she recommended I try something with a 5 or 6 at the start so I'll peruse boots !

Harriet that is rubbish things like that do make me cross ! At this stage I would just make sure you keep your arm moving, not too much but don't be tempted to not use it. Gentle stretches and moving your shoulders up and down.Wear a soft comfortable bra. Hope your BCN gets back to you as a lot of people find them really useful, not me I don't have one !

Malt - let me know what you use and how you get on - exciting stuff.

harriet - that sounds a bit rubbish :( but glad you are home. You can find the exercises here :)

Thanks Tiny hugs much appreciated. Good luck with your Chemo today xx

I know I have all of you to talk to and I am VERY VERY VERY grateful for that. But it would be nice to have some RL company too. I was so looking forward to my friends coming over for a takeaway and movie. So for both of them to cancel was just too much

My energy levels by this time of the week are not great, so it's now trying to find something to do or somewhere to go, to fill my weekend. Because although my body would probably enjoy another PJ weekend, my sanity can't cope with a whole 3 days with just me and the 4 Walls

But I'll survive. I'm just feeling a bit let down, and a bit sorry for myself. That and the fact I'm already stressing about going back for Chemo next Friday!

Moan moan moan moan, SORRY!

Ah really it's pants when your friends let you down. You're allowed to moan and be fed up (actually, I don't think you are moaning. Not properly. A proper moan is much moanier. You're just saying what you're feeling). And it's true that us lot online aren't much good for a takeaway and a movie (just trying to imagine what it would be like to synchronise us all watching something together..).

Just watching the rain and wondering if it will ever stop....

Kitkat glad dd is doing ok though I understand your frustration, well done to ds that's fab. Mine are just home from school, dis called me a ginger ninja and dd laughed but then said it was ok. Kids !

Really don't apologise for moaning we all do it and are entitled to I think ! I hope you find something nice to do this weekend

Wren it's an awful day here too and ds is going on a cub camp for the weekend, thankfully in huts rather than tents but I'm half expecting them to cancel it

Oh Harriet that doesn't sound good. I hope you're feeling a bit better now. FWIW I'm still not wearing a bra (only a 34B)! The only sports bra that I own doesn't open and has to go on over your head - cue much struggling to get it past shoulders. Everything else is underwired. So today I went to try and buy something, anything that didn't have underwires which basically meant sports bras. But nothing worked!! Half of them had seams across the nipples, I'm sorry but who designs sports bras with something that will rub the only sticky out bit involved?? The only one that had a comfortable cup was a racer back style with an opening at the back but only the band opened, not the whole bra so it still had to go on over the top. Sigh. I'm not good at buying clothes at the best of times - will try on one of my underwired versions tomorrow.

The main exercise that I was given was to put your hands together in a prayer pose and raise them to your face and back to your chest, gradually moving them further and further up your face. I also did the ones that Betsy linked to, but only for a couple of days. I've just been using my arm as normal.

I will apparently be able to have an appointment with the physio to discuss exercise at the start of chemo. I usually do pilates but the nurse insisted that that was 'too heavy'.

And to answer your question (finally ) my nodes were clear. I need chemo because it was invasive even though it hadn't invaded anywhere. Chemo will reduce the risk of recurrence, so I'm told.

updating Have you looked online for a bra? I ended up getting some bra's on eBay that fasten at the front! They are soft cup with no seams. They have wide soft straps, a bit like a sports bra! So we aren't talking the height of fashion, but they are really comfortable and they were easy to take on and off, especially straight after surgery!

hey updating i'm only a B too but have squashed myself into this front fastening sports bra - did speak to BCN today finally (i had her wrong email address) and she kind of said do what feels comfy. I actually feel a lot better today (though a little blue (in mood, not just in colour...my boob is completely blue thanks to dye, and they said it could last forever!!!)....think that's pretty normal post anaesthetic, trying to keep pecker up and not dwell overly on next Friday, easier said than done!)
And thank you betsy i've started the moves. i have pretty good motion so think i'll be ok in the long run.

Just had bad news about things. If it's not the low grade cancerous sarcoma that they thought it to be, it'll be something worse as it is something called Fibromatosis that has a high likelihood of coming back and would need cancer treatment incl. chemo, radiotherapy, etc.
this is very rare. Not a cancer so no support from cancer charity.
Will know next week what it is. I was afraid of it being a low grade sarcoma but turns out that'd be better as would need only to be taken out. No chemo etc.
my head and emotions are upside down. So yet another wait - beginning of next weeks or histology results, they think. It ain't all over
I never thought I'd wish it was a low grade sarcoma!

I find it strange how hospital care can vary so much in different areas. Sorry you didn't get the best care after surgery harriet I feel really lucky as I had a visit from Consultant, Anaesthetist, and Physiotherapist before I was discharged. My BCN also warned me about the post surgery blues

I found it more comfortable if I wore sports bra for bed, felt a little more supported. I also worried about trying to get them over my head but found I could manage to step into it and just pull it up.

Sorry to hear you didn't/don't have a BCN malt not sure how I would cope without mine.

Do you happen to know what make your bras are really? I'll go and have a look online. Thanks Mummy I'll also have a go at stepping into my sports bra. That option never occurred to me!

Sorry to hear you feel (are!) blue Harriet. Hope you feel better tomorrow. Fingers crossed for good results and for Goodness too!

updating, after my reconstruction I got a soft mastectomy bra from Betty and Belle. Front fastening. Very useful. Www.bettyandbelle.co.uk. Would be just as good for a lumpectomy. To be honest I went straight to a supportive underwired bra after my lumpectomy. The BCN advised support over softness.

goodness that is tough news to absorb. I'm so sorry that you have this further shock to deal with.

The make of the bra was Amoena.

Xxx

Sorry you've got more waiting goodness, and like you say an odd situation where the cancer option might be the lesser of two evils!

Really -did you manage to sort out a meet up with friends this weekend, hope so, but if not a bit of retail therapy with coffee and cakes might be in order! Are you near any of us?

It's horrid waiting for results goodness hope they turn out for the best next week. If you do need chemo we will help you through it though

Ds at cub camp and were off to London tomorrow to see war horse, have new boots dress and scarf to wear !

Hi Really - I was also wondering where you are (roughly) as there maybe one of us in your neck of the woods.

Goodness - sorry to hear you have to wait on more results. Are they the only 2 possible outcomes now? Also forgive me if I've not followed properly but did your Op get everything out - it wasn't just a biospy was it?

Malt you'll have a fab time in London - everyone says that War Horse is fab and it's great to have a weekend away (and new clothes!!). I hope your DS doesn't get too wet!

Goodness hugs - posted on fb , I am sorry that it is not great news. Horrible as you are done in so can't be doing with this news.

Really sorry that you are so low.