**TAMOXIFEN 35**the all dancing,fat boy snacking and drugs thread

[MaryAnnSingleton]

yoo hoo - over here- bring the trolley...

It's absolutely Like mc/if. I used to lurk desperately and post tons when in despair . Now I don't and I keep thinking should as my mc story would probably give others hope. But don't feel need when ok.

Morning from me. I am doing a ridiculous panda impression after a pub lunch in sunglasses in a sunny but breezy spot so I did not realise how burnt I am until too late. The children keep coming in and pointing laughing at me. I have a meeting at work tomorrow too so I am going to look really cool and professional.

malt I think everyone is right and stay away from the forums etc. when I was diagnosed ( with a type of cancer no one has heard of) I had quite a few people say 'oh my friend/ sister had that and is fine 20/ 30 years later' took the wind out of my sails a bit as I was in full on funeral planning wailing mode.

Today I am doing the washing and staying out of the sun.

I have my entire family coming over for a barbecue. It's my parent's 50th wedding anniversary. I hope the weather stays nice.

Trice 50 years that's great congratulations to them, hope you all have a great day
NJ I'm laughing at your panda eyes ! Get out in the sun today and try and get it to blend in a bit ?
Gigs I had 3 m/cs very sad but like you say you move on and dont really talk about it, I do still think about them though
Have a good day all x

Right notjenkins you need to get you and your panda eyes over to jchips house and eat all her bamboo -

And malt the comparison with miscarriage is that on average 1/5 women have them, but people don't tend to talk about them and you have no idea how common they are. Same with BC, 1/8 lifetime chance if you're a woman. So incredibly common.

Who's on tamoxifen? I'm due to start this week. My BC nurse said reactions are hugely variable, but some brands are better than others. Any to avoid!

And you should talk about cancer and miscarriage if you can. It demystifies it and then you "own" the experience. I think we've said before on this thread, you can't let things like cancer or miscarriages define you. They are part of you, but so is my grey hair, wobbly bottom and tendency to occasionally say wrong thing in social settings ....

Waving to Panda NotJ.

Trice, have a great barbecue. Hope it's not stressful, just fun.

coorong, I'm not sure I believe the whole Tamoxifen and different brands thing. I know I haven't found any difference. The main thing for me has been menopausal symptoms, so hot flushes. I haven't found it too bad though - been on it for 2.5 years now and about to switch to Letrozole.

Sad about miscarriages. I've been lucky there, but can imagine it's something which stays with you. On cancer, I think Jane's spot on. Of my mum's circle of friends I found out 5 out of 10 have had some dealings with BC and they're all still about including my own mum. I didn't know about any of them until I was diagnosed. Best thing anyone said to me on diagnosis was a friend who said 'my dad's had cancer twice'. Okay, so it wasn't BC, but still it made me realise cancer doesn't necessarily mean death.

Gig, hope you're okay and the sun proves restorative. x

Is old lady dog any better, Kurri? Must be so scary to see her when she's like that.

Just seen you've been talking about teeth. I didn't lose any, but after chemo found I'd got a teeny bit of gum disease. Sorted now, but definitely worth going to dentist regularly for advice.

Will read and catch up more later. Off out to meet DH's sister on Hampstead Heath for a picnic. I will take sun screen - thanks for reminder, NotJ!

Waving to all. Have a lovely bank holiday.

I don't think the brand thing makes any difference with tamoxifen - was on it up until dx with mets and had several different brands during that time.
Am planning new website today and having Pimms later with parents. Dh has been for a walk on the chalk hills nearby looking for the first wild orchid but only saw cowslips. No cows either (this is where we were nearly trampled by Dexters)

I've come in out of the sun. There are lots of bamboo shoots to nibble on not j going to buy some more pots and a soil sieve for later. We have it on the run but are going to have to lift the slabs where the bins are and also work out how to screen the bins now :). Going to plant up some seeds too :). Lovely sunny bh for a change :)

Hello all,

Busy day yesterday as we had a birthday lunch with family, I made the birthday cake on Saturday and it was very well received :) still some left over for the trolley - lemon cake with lemon curd butter cream. I didn't really believe I'd actually make it there til we got there as was feeling a bit grim and haven't managed any family things for ages so it was fabulous :) my grandparents were thrilled to see me and only one "still fighting hard" comment from distant relative! Very little head tilting, some "oh you must feel soooo rubbish..." yes but don't want to be reminded! :)

Anyway all ended in a bit of drama as dad's car broke down on the way home, luckily at services not on motorway and aunt was passing so took me and mum home while dad waited a few hours for the truck to pick him and car up!

Today am feeling awful, had a really rough night of going to the loo every half hour then every hour then every couple of hours so skin is burning and I spent half the night wishing I'd have a temperature so could go to the hospital and be fixed! :( silly I know as nothing they can really do. But I've had to stop chemo tablets for this cycle as one of the "golden rules" was stop if more than ten bathroom visits in 24 hours. I think the infusion jut doesn't work for me! I feel like a wimp for not just soldiering on and like if the cancer comes back it'll be because I didn't do the chemo well enough :( I feel a bit lost really!

Anyway I shall stop with the whinging as I expect it does me more harm than good, shall catch up on all the posts and I hope everyone is enjoying the bank holiday and getting some sunshine! :)

Sunshine ?
Pah !
I've just had to leg it out to bring the washing in as its raining here

I blame HND , cos she was gardening this morning !

Ash is your skin suffering again from your repeated toilet trips ?
I remember chemo bum very unfondly , it must be awful for you

DH and DD gone out to the museum and lunch .
DS didn't want to go , and I'm in one of my needing to stay close to the loo or I'll pee myself moods (really should see a doc about this ...)

Have just painted my nails a lovely shade if apricot though , so not a completely awful day

oh ash that does sound rotten- and you certainly aren't a wimp - not one bit. Glad you had a lovely day yesterday but horrid to have this today. Cake does sound yum.

Was she gardening in the nude topsy? Shame about the rain. Definitely worth seeing the doctor. I can really recommend aquaflex if doctor suggests a "device". My physio recommended them and they seem to be working, much less scary than the pelvic toner thing that my bowel nurse recommended! I hope you and DS are having a nice day together :)

Yes skin is fun combo of lots of visits, chemo making everything horrid and no colon to digest things properly. I've found a really good cream called Drapolene though, which is fab for chemo bum also says good for sunburn and really takes the sting out better than others.

MAS thank you :) think I will probably just stick to the tablets now! How's the website planning going?

think I've thought of what I want on website,from a design point of view...just going to do some lettering... had lunch out in the garden-yay ! Is drapoline a nappy rash type cream ?

Ah good, sounds productive. Lunch in the garden sounds lovely :) yes Drapolene is nappy rash cream.

Just popping by as have become expert on the scramble for Africa in 8 hours and about to embark on timeline to try and help Little Copt organise her thoughts. Unfortunately I seem to have passed on my aspirational organiser genes with emphasis on aspirational Exams start next Monday and it is going to be a rocky ride to the end of June. She is bright and has such good ideas and understands the whole picture but just really worry that dyslexia will stop her getting it on paper , plus god knows what Gove has initiated in terms of grade deflation this time. If I was sitting exams now I would never have got to uni and had the life chances I have had. I am being calm and breezy and pretending it doesn't matter on the surface whilst feeling really churned up inside for her. She also really feels the pressure of living up to Big Copts achievements though we have never compared and they are totally different in terms of their strengths.

How is T getting on MAS? Anyone else facing exam trauma?

coorong Both my gynae and Dr Geek think that the 1 in 5 who miscarry may form more than their fair share of the 1 in 8 who get BC .

When I was having trouble conceiving I was part of a study that was looking into the possibility of hormone therapies based on the hypothesis that a lot of unexplained miscarriage may be based on hormone imbalance, often with women miscarrying even before they know they are pregnant (they assessed 2 out of 3 pregnancies end in miscarriage) and they did find that my levels of Estrogen were high. Dr Geek thinks a lot of the unexplained risk may lie in exposure to hormones, through genetic predisposition combined with drugs, diet and the environment. So menopause has definitely been my friend.

Another here who didn't see any difference between brands of Tamoxifen. Only side effect was that fat tended to congregate in a tyre around my middle but that may have been CAKE

Ash sorry you are having a rough time with your rear end but don't worry about the effectiveness of the chemo. If it is giving you a rough time , it is giving the Cancer cells a good blasting too and chemi is always about calibrating doses according to your bodies reaction 's totally normal. Mine was reduced and delayed in every treatment cycle and I think people who manage to keep to the original regime are the exception rather than the rule.

nj DH is bald and frequently forgets hat and effect of shiny pate + sun and has to go into work not just red but with bits of skin peeling off. Not a professional look

Malt you seem in amongst the panic to be perfecting the art of distraction and putting head into sand, both excellent ways of coping.

KK hope Old Lady Dog better and that DH stayed away from the levels last night

Waves to all I have forgotten but need to get back to all those imperialists and communists......

gigs the bubbles look fun

Thank you for the tamoxifen advice. I'm anticipating some symptoms so will have to wait to see how it all pans out.
mas sorry to hear you're not having much fun. Nothing I can offer but some non-head tilting sympathy.

Just back from a short walk in the peaks with half of Manchester ..... It was lovely - sun on our backs and that warm tired feeling from being outdoors. Will put some left over biscuits on the trolley ....

Who's on for a Pimms tonight? I have some lemonade cooling, no mint but some berries and the right attitude!

Have some pimms for me as off the drink for now. Have had lovely day -waiting for big gig to come from party now. Went to buy Some cheap loose clothes for me but ended up with tons for the minis .

Back later to post more as have read it all.

dh attacking bamboo with axe again, this is hard work...

meant to saycopt that the study re: miscarriage and BC sounds interesting. I know correlation and causation different, but would love to contribute me data to someone somewhere. I never investigated my miscarriage, but did have bloods taken somewhere along the line.

gigs i got some cheap loose clothing from Gap outlet - big american sizing and nice soft cotton. I got a few tops for post mx getting on an off easily which I'm still wearing becuase they're so nice. They also do offers regularly. But it's stuff you really want to try on rather than order on line because their sizes are a bit all over the place.

And if you insist, I'll have a pimms for you . Glad to hear you had a good day. Days like today, when the sun is out, doors and windows are open are worth more than a pimms (sun emoticon)

xposted jchochip - you need a machete!

yes machete has been mentioned! Pimms would be nice later, may have some mint...

Glad we are tackling it now though, it would only get worse and now we have it on the run we can see how close to the house it is...

Putting dinner in now, would like to do some baking too...

Is it still raining Topsy ?

Hi all
Back after a lovely weekend away but now absolutely terrified about my appointment tomorrow, biopsy last week said it was cancer this will tell me type and stage is that right ? They said to expect a long appointment as they'd be discussing treatments.

Pass the pimms over here please, or the Aldi one which tastes the same I'm not fussy !

Ash sorry to hear about your chemo effects

Waves to everyone else x

Hand over the Pimms coorong I'm with you! - it must be sunny!

Malt I teach year 1 too - its fun, isn't it?! I had a year off, January 2012 to January 2013, and am currently 3 days a week. Its about all I want to do at the moment, although in negotiation about whether I can continue for another year part time. I want to have my own class again, not sharing with anyone, but the whole cancer thing makes you reassess things, and I am loving spending some more time with DS while he is still small. But I love teaching too, so am glad to be back.

Wagamamas was excellent - had duck pancakey things, tempura prawns and chilli squid for starter, then teryaki chicken with veggies and rice. Twas most yummy - will definitely go again!

coorong I'm on tamoxifen and wasnt offered any particular brand. I don't think I've done too badly on it, so don't worry too much about what might be. Just crack on and see how you get on!

What appointments this week? Tospy CT (and my checkup) on Thursday - what else going on?

Sending lots of sunshiney love to everyone x x x x x x