how the heck do I support DH tomorrow if the consultant tells him he has cancer?

[MrsShrek3]

sigh. just that. DH has Big lump in neck. Various doctors, registrars and pathologists looking very worried and saying he "should have been told more". Appointment with his own consultant tomorrow afternoon. Worried sick, but wtf do I do to help him? He doesn't want me to go with him, he;d rather I keep the children with me.

Hi mrs shrek, have lurked on this thread glad dh is doing a bit better this week, hope he continues to improve. Did you get out for your meal? :)

Yes we went out for a most delish curry. During the day DH felt so rubbish that he wanted to cancel but at the last minute we decided to go. Very pleased we did as it was lovely. He's felt crap for the whole of this cycle (slightly less crap for a few days but now it's returned) and tbh we are dreading him passing the blood test on Mon and having chemo on Tuesday. It will make him so ill and he's feeling rubbish already It's certainly a test of what the body can endure. Horrible.

Interesting name haemadoots
Thanks for asking tho... This thread has kept me going. Seriously. I'd be more of a gibbering wreck by now.

I love a curry, I am sure a few hours being out and enjoying a meal with you has boosted him mentally. The treatment certainly does push the body to the limit, hope fully he feels stronger for Tuesday.

I wanted something that represents my Scottishness if that's even a word lol

I don't know whether he needs to feel stronger mentally or physically tbh - I fear it's both. I actually hope he doesn't pass the blood test. Awful thing to say.

Completely understandable when you see him suffering

Sorry Mr Shrek is feeling rotten and likely to feel more awful on Tuesday

I'm guessing it is fingers crossed he does pass the blood test, but knowing chemo is going to be shit must be horrible.

Hope at least for tonight the curry worked it's magic (my DH's mood is always improved by curry).

When I see your username on other threads I always hope your DH and you are doing OK.

Ahh... We've got it then.
Man + curry =

Thanks for the thoughts. Its so good knowing there are folk with funny names out there thinking of us

MrsS - I would like to take a bet that you read Haemadoots name as haem-a-doots, rather than hae-ma-doots - given what you and your DH are currently going through! I know that's how I read it first, anyway

Glad the curry improved your DH's mood for a bit - and I kind of hope his bloods are good enough so he can get on with his treatment, even though it's truly horrible for him.

Ah I never even thought, not its hae-ma-doots=have-my-doubts

Ahhh. But as Thumb says, ask any of us brainwashed with chemospeak and it's haema doots.
Actually I thought you were swearing (haema=bloody + whatever lingo doots is in lol)

Good luck for this week MrsShrek and family :)

Thanks choco

Have had some daft crying days again presumably not having too much to do is giving me a reality hit. It sucks.

they've given him big antibiotics and postponed for a week. Am relieved. He honestly wasn't well enough.

Am glad he's got the hardarsed antibiotics - and that he gets another week to recover his strength a bit more.

Crying is supposed to be therapeutic so you might as well indulge every now and then - get yourself something to punch as well, that helps too. (((hugs))) xx

ta thumb :) love "hardarse antibiotics" - that is now their official name
hope you and new blue baby are doing well! (going to have to inbox you when I get on the laptop!) if you're up for replying here please feel free, we need some distraction digression news :)

Over and Daisy, where aaaare you? Hope things are going ok for both of you!

No problem - baby boy is doing well, he's a cutie but has a tendency to spit up his milk more than his big brother ever did. I find it mildly aggravating that my lovingly produced milk is spat back, I have to say..
Can't believe he's already nearly 2w old! That's flown past. Belly still hurts though, boo. Actually, I still have occasional moments when I forget I've had him and still think I'm pregnant - that's just weird! Bad Baby Brain this time - went shopping without any credit cards/money today, had to get DH along to the supermarket to pay for my trolleyload of stuff . Good job we only live a few mins away.

Here's hoping the Hardarsed antibiotics do their job.
I must go hard boil eggs or DD2 will kick me up the arse for MNing not doing her lunch.

I'm here!

We are not long back from the hospital and round 3 of the chemo which seems to have gone OK so far.

Yesterday's pre chemo bloods contained bloody brilliant news - Hb levels have remained the same as they were post transfusion 3 weeks ago which indicates the fucking tumour has stopped bleeding . They also showed improved liver function which is also brilliant news given the cancer had spread to his liver before it was discovered.

I have everything crossed that the chemo is having some effect on this cancer, in spite of what the oncologists have said. I cannot lose my lovely Mr Daisy to this.

There are a couple of other positive signs at the moment - he can lie on his left hand side for the first time in months; now we know what is inside him, it's obvious that the tumour which is at the top of his stomach was slipping down and pressing on his organs. Now it doesn't seem to be. And he has a massively increased appetite - he isn't struggling with food. The tumour was blocking the entrance to his stomach and making him feel full with a teeny amount of food. He is much thinner than he was! But he has only lost 3lb in the past 3 weeks which is a big improvement.

Mrs Shrek I'm glad they're right on top of Mr Shrek. At the weekend you weren't sure he was well enough for this round - week off with hardarse antibiotics will give his body time to recover again. It is going to be a long haul for all of us this treatment; and it is awful, consuming and so bloody important.

over where are you? Are you OK?

thumb good job you live so close to the shops but for an ouchy tummy. about a beautiful baby boy though!

great update Daisy, so good to hear from you. Hoping mr Daisy gets to a checkmate situation with the bastard cancer very soon. It doesn't need to be an outright win yet just as long as B*cancer doesn't either.

Star, I thought you were going to hardboil dd2 for a moment then,oops

baby brain lasts for the next eighteen few years donchano Thumb...mine's not got right yet (see above) When ds2 a little older than yours I almost left him in the supermarket trolley and was all for taking the shopping home instead

Daisy, I don't want to get too excited but that sounds bloody brilliant news!! Really really hope it's as good as it sounds.

Eep to hardboiled DDs and eep again to leaving babies in shopping trolleys! yet another thing for me to be paranoid about

he's on the mend thanks to hardarsed ab's.
I'm in bits. spent all week crying again when I'm not being ranty
seriously considering taking time off work. which would hopefuly avoid crashing/burning out completely. that feels like a cop out. gp and just about everyone else nagging me to do it even though none of them know the half of it! sorry on here moaning again :(

Here is the best place to moan/rant/let off steam! Do it - sound like you nrrd to take the pressure off a bit, and if you crash'n'burn, who is going to pick up the pieces?

(((hugs))) just because. xx

thank you for hugs, much needed.

haven't seen this thread for ages! are you on half term hols Mrs Shrek?
my dh is on the 2nd lot of his current chemo. he's found that it really hits him hard after 3 days. Spent most of today in bed and will probably do the same tomorrow. I can't sleep (again) so will have a good read of this thread now.