**TAMOXIFEN**22 !

[MaryAnnSingleton]

yikes- here we go...

Gig, let's sit on the paranoia box and share the chocolate. You can rant away while we eat it. Did they call this morning then? Or did you get a letter?

Topsy gets all the choc brazils?! Dives to grab any left.

l4k, it's so hard making choices for others. I'm guessing since losing their father they're a bit protective of her? That might mean they should be included from the start. I didn't tell lots of people, including my parents until some way into treatment and I know they found that incredibly hurtful. Was still right for me, but every decision has a knock on iyswim.

Big round of applause for Sparkle's wee catching. Hope the op goes okay. Seems trite to say the funeral too, but still you know what I mean. Hope your DH's okay.

btw, my windows are looking a bit shoddy in the sunlight too. I have tilted the blinds.

Morning all. I do love the inventor of Difflam. Mouth much recovered today. Wish I had had the green liquid of joy last cycle. . . have gritty eyes instead today. Booooooooo. . .

14k so sorry to hear about MIL. My GP was quite cagey when I saw him, but he said that we had to consider the possibility that it might be cancer. He was quite shocked when my dx came back. . . I didn't tell anyone except DH about the appointments, partly cos it was over Chrsitmas, and I didn't want to worry family until I knew that there was something to worry about, iyswim. If she wants to wait until she has definite news, maybe that's the way to go. Please keep us posted and we can support you and your family, whatever happens.

gig ye gods, how frustrating for you. Hope you can get some answers next week. Feeling desperate for you to get going with this. Big hugs, brave lady x

What was midi gig up to?!

topsy therein lies the benefits of Jack Russels. They would have to stand on each other to reach the work top! Am sure it was definitely a reflection on the high quality of our cooking that tempted him.

sparkle RIP Jason indeed. Thinking of you and DH today.

Well done on the wee collecting. Excellent effort!

GRACIE ? You lurking? Hope you OK, love x x

Waves to MAS, kurri, smee and anyone else around this morning. My graze box h come today - happy to share! Chocolate covered sunflower seeds anyone?

Gig I hope you get some answers/feedback/at date! I have my fingers crossed.

14K It is such a worry I know, maybe when she has been to the breast clinic she will feel ready to tell her dc.....I hope so. You take care of yourself too, have you rearranged your own clinic appointment yet?

Topsy at thought of acrobatic jack russells making a pyramind to reach the work top! I am such pigdog was just wanting to pay your cooking a huge complement.

The vets said they will ring when she is out of surgery. She came to school with the dc this morning and spent the journey with her head on dd1's knee.....pulling on the 6yr olds heart strings. She is a bit special this dog, she saved our puppy's life, and probably dd2's from an attack from three farm dogs by standing blocking the door to prevent the attackers from getting in the house. I had never seen her get herself looking so big and fierce before.

Am putting giant chocolate buttons on the fbs trolley, they are supposed to be for decorating ds' birthday cake, but I accidentally on purpose over catered.

yum,yes please ned

I too love Grandma's House - was fab.
Am off to work now- several new commissions on the go...
My brother is staying at my parents tonight so we'll nip over for supper- he has to be up at 5.30 or something to drive to Stratford for an Olympics thing (he is a sports events organiser) Will be nice to see him.

aw,bless Nikki- a hero dog.

Hi all my paranoia and I have called in again :)
Today is my return to the GP after my 10day antibx[2nd course].The cough is much better but not gone and I am still doing a lot of nose blowing.have just come from reading lots of [hopefully irrelevant]stuff on bcc. I am such a wimp sometimes.
Yesterday was my youngest dgs first day at proper nursery school-he was so proud:) he was holding out the front of his 'nuiform' sweatshirt and refusing to zip up his coat.He looked tiny,he is only 3.2 and small with it.I hope I am around to see him grow up [I am 68].
I am sorry I am more needy than supprtive atm especially as so many are going through much worse things.
Sending love and positivity to all of you.

thegreylady, you'll be needing one of our then and a nice sit down on the paranoia box with the rest of us.
Hope all goes OK at the GP - let us know??

Hi everyone else. DS failed his driving test today on one silly error (oops) and it's stressy stress at work and will be for weeks so I'll be for a bit I expect. There again, I often am .

I just wrote a really long post and lost it

So am just going to waving to everyone, and sending hugs to everyone who needs one.

Greylady - am sitting on the paranoia box for you, - try not to read stuff on t'internet

joins everyone on paranoia box for greylady - really hope all goes well at GP -will be thinking of you.
amber am sure he'll pass next time- hope your whirlish next few weeks are tolerable

Have a good time seeing our Db MAS

Your Db - sorry my Y is sticking - probably a crumb stuck under it!

Waves to all. Hope your dog is OK Sparkle and Gracie is surviving her first chemo. Smee - glad you had a great time in New York - we missed you. Greylady - hope your grandson had a good first day - they look so cute at that age in uniform. Badluck on driving test - Amber - I am still unsure how I passed mine - but could have been lack of traffic on the road and no hills (took it in Cambridge) which worked in my favour. Ned - I think on balance I prefer the docetaxol to the epirubicin as no sickness but I have felt very tired this cycle. They are reducing the dose for next one so hopefully will avoid trip to hospital this time. ds2 had three good days at school but a blip again yesterday. I guess it was being a bit optimistic that it would sorted out that quickly. This year has been hard on all of us but I am hoping we will get back to normal when I have finshed the treatment. We still have five Lindt chocolate bunnies on the shelf - dh can't resist a half-price offer - so will put them on the FBS trolley.

Runs in to snaffle fbs from the trolley. I'm on the train so dodgy phone and internet connection. Mum should be discharged later this afternoon, I may make it home before her! Will catch up later...

eight been thinking about your DS. How did today go? Hope he managed to finish the week of a better day. Glad to hear the Docetaxol not too bad. I have found th sickness rather draining, so good to hear this might be milder.

Arf at kurri 's crumb ridden keyboard. You clearly need one of these

amber sorry about DSs driving test. All the best people take at least 2 or 3 goes to pass.

Waves to smee hope you're not working too hard?

MAS latest blog v interesting. Hope you are pleased with how it's turning out?

thanks ned - I want to make it interesting and hopefully helpful-am also discovering facebook friends with touches of OCD
jane hope your ma is ok
Have just finished my mega picture for BIL's birthday- phew- hope he likes it !
Off to see my brother shortly.

Aargh Mum not coming home today (when there is someone to reassure her), she is a bit confused so they have decided to keep her till Monday. How will that help, exactly?

oh no jane - how stupid

Evening Peeps

Heading next door (when DH finally gets home from the gym) to get some hair dying help . Going a sort of coppery blondey brown . Bored of the purple !

Hoping Nicki Dogs surgery went smoothly , and any news from gracie ?

Feeling a little wobbly today , think its all catching up with me .
All I've heard this week is about people with Cancer , and I'm beginning to get a bit fed up of the bloody word .
Don't feel like fighting anything right now

Jane I am hoping they are not releasing your mum till the appropriate home care package is in place . And that is notoriously hard to sort out on a Friday .
Hope she is sorted soon .

Will be back later but here are two new words for you to think on - wine and chips topsy

j how annoying about your mum and it does sound like 2 more days wont make a difference.

greylady how are you doing?

amber poor dh (and busy you) - took me three times to pass.

Dh email may work as they are trying to start me next week- will hear mon/tues.

Got wine gig , it's chilling as I type .
And friend whose house I am going to is making chicken wings and spicey lamb balls .
My kinda evening ...

GP said infection almost gone and peak flow increased from230 to 300. I still have a bit of chest pain and my temp is slightly raised. He said there is a little fluid at the bottom of one lung but overall big improvement. He wants to see me again in 4 weeks and if still doubtful wants me to have ray. He says he doesn't suspect any cancer connection but there may be another problem which could be dealt with. I do feel happier now and will see how it goes. Thank you all very much for the hand holding and support. I need to squash the paranoia as it is spoiling the good times a bit. I suppose the prog for tnbc tends to be a bit grim so I can't believe my luck in getting to 5 years yet I greedily want another 20!!

thegreylady, if you've made it to 5 yrs with tnbc, you've got past the bit where the odds are bad and are into the bit where the odds are better than ours. Which is a heck of a relief...

Good for you for wine (and Topsy re cancer alerts, IMe it's sods law you see the references you don't need when you are most vulnerable. I certainly felt that was why everyone I knew was up the duff when I kept miscarrying),

This is a really interesting link livestrong survivor care plan. No replacement for proper one to one care but the idea of managing not being subsumed by this is what I like.

Will try and post properly later.

greylady - that sounds like positive news from the GP, I hope you are feeling better soon. I think paranoia is normal and something we all live with, - I definitely feel that at times I'm far more aware of it and then I have a better patch and feel OK - it comes in waves. Hopefully you feel more confident now having seen the doctor and can relax and enjoy things again How did little DGS get on at school today? - Hope he had good fun

topsy - - a meal and wine with your friend is a good remedy for a wobbly day. I hope you feel better tomorrow. {wine] and more and xx

jane - sorry about your mum, that is a pain - from my experience with my dad and my MIL I've found hospitals can be a bit clueless when it comes to geriatric patients.

Gig - fingers crossed for a next week start. Off to read your link now.