**t*a*m*o*x*i*f*e*n** number 14

[MaryAnnSingleton]

here we go !

my dd 15 is a nightmare when it comes to clothes shes always got a long list of what she wants next,theres no uniform at her school which doesnt help my purse.shes even worse with her hair spends hours grooming it and hogging mirrors all over the house and you always know when it hasnt gone right as you hear big screams and my worst nightmare would be to run out of hairspray there would be hell to pay.

Mind you the cost of my dc school uniforms......?
at crime of running out of hairspray

Offers jane a tin of tuna to tempt the kitty back home .

Made shepherds pie . Had loads of carrots and sweetcorn , so I shoved them in too .
Saving the cabbage for tomorrows dinner . Going to make bubble and squeak .
Haven't had that for years .

Am looking forward to seeing cakes DH dressed up as Snow White . I reckon we def need photos of that .

Just had a phone call from my hospital social worker (didn't know I had one !) . She was telling me about a local charity for younger breast cancer sufferers , it's run by a woman who was diagnosed at the age of 24 and she has had 3 re ocurrences since .
Well they have decided to give me a cheque for a pampering weekend for DH and I ! How amazing is that ?
And also next April Legally Blonde comes to our theatre , and they are sending DH and I to see it and for a dinner date too .
Isn't that something nice to look forward too ?

I am lucky that so far I haven't had the rudeness from my DC . I am sure it will come . DS and DH argue constantly , but that's mainly down to DH . He says no , and then if the DC nag enough , he gives in and says yes .
Whilst they know if I say no , then just walk away .
My sister did laugh an awfull lot after DD was born at the thought of me putting up with a teenage DD who was 1/10 as bad as I was as a teenager !
I certainly wasn't the angel you see before you now

Hope the onc appointment goes well this afternoon kk . And I hope they are more open to reconstruction talks this time . Wonder if I will ever get offered it ? I haven't asked , but I am presuming they only let ladies who are "cured" get reconstructed ?
Glad little dog is enjoying life , and give DH a kick from me for loosing your treat !

sparkle - don't hide away feeling blue . I had a bad week last week too . Come and blurt it out to us .

Woah , this has been a post and a half !
I shall shut up now

oh wow- that's fab topsy- you deserve lovely treats !!

KK- forgot to say good luck at oncs -and hope they are more encouraging about reconstruction.
I would find a teenage girl really hard -I grew up with boys and was quite tomboyish for a long time. My friend has 2 girls,14 and 18 and I gather they are hard work (but also lovely !)
Now- advice please-or reassurance- my school friends (2 of them) from primary school are coming to lunch on Friday- I have very little time to do much this week,but was planning to make an orange polenta cake for pudding,to serve with creme fraiche...for lunch proper I was going to put out lots of anti pasti type things- olives,roasted vegetables,artichoke hearts,nice salami and chorizo,proscuitto etc and salad- maybe a Greek salad or mozarella and tomato with avocado...and some nice olive bread- would that be acceptable ? I am in a bit of a tizz about it. (the friend who had us to lunch before made lovely things so am feeling worried)

If she is 15 and old enough to be using hairspray, then surely she should buy her own? I'm afraid I won't take responsgbility for dd's shopping, I'd only get it wrong! yes I am mad cat lady. Last night after dark had 3 cats come to me unfortunately not the two that are missing :-( next doors cat had better come home before they get back from holiday. Think will cook chicken for tea in hope cats come back ...

If she is 15 and old enough to be using hairspray, then surely she should buy her own? I'm afraid I won't take responsgbility for dd's shopping, I'd only get it wrong! yes I am mad cat lady. Last night after dark had 3 cats come to me unfortunately not the two that are missing :-( next doors cat had better come home before they get back from holiday. Think will cook chicken for tea in hope cats come back ...
thanks for the tuna!

how did that happen? oops

mas lunch sounds scrummy and special cake too. Don't worry - i'm sure you will have a lovely time :-)

bubble and squeek:-)

What a lovely thing to be able to look forward to, a pampering weekend and the theatre. I am so glad to know their are people who give so much to others.

Hope everything has gone well this afternoon kurri

x post, sorry I delayed posting whilst I assisted with violin practice

MAS that lunch sounds fabulous, if you can do all of that, then go with it....yummy.

topsy...wow that great,the only thing i got offered was a nail and hand masage but hows my luck no bloody nails left and shreading skin on my hands and feet.think you got the better offer sounds brilliant.

mas...that menu sounds amazing,i bet their not even bothered about the food just looking foward to seeing you and catching up.

jane...of course your right but i would have to be very brave to suggest that lol.

thanks for reassurance - I won't be doing much really,just assembling ! I always feel I should make stuff. Cakes and puddings I can do confidently,but not real food.
The charity locally that I've designed a Christmas card for does pampering/massage/hair/nails/shiatsu too I think for free for anyone who has recently had bc treatment - hope they sell lots !

pink dd1 is 17 now and MUCH nicer than she was 13- 15. (dd2 now 13 though ...) hmmm haven't heard any violin practice tonight pause for shout upstairs -

good news next doors cat has turned up. maybe ours will come in soon?

topsy, - how lovely for you to have those treats - you will have a fab time, and what a great idea that group sounds. Also I'm fairly sure you would be eligible for a reconstruction if you wanted to have one, - lots of people have them when they have their mastectomy, so before they know the stage of their cancer.

I hope your cat turns up this evening jane, has he wandered before? - my sister had one that was always going off, but always came back.

MAS - that lunch sounds very acceptable (I may turn up at your house - might also be calling in at topsy's for her bubble and squeak!), I'm glad DS had a good trip.

Apparently I have to ring my breast surgeon's secretary for an appointment to discuss recon. so I will do that this week.
And good news - the onc. doesn't want to see me for another year, I was so relieved I ran out of his office shouting 'do I need a blood form?', he put his hand on my shoulder and said 'of course you do, calm down, you get so over-excited' - it was just that I couldn't wait to get out of there!

DH has confessed that he is getting a memory of unwrapping my Special K bar and shoving it in his gob accidentally eating it

MAS and cakes - the book sounds very good - hope you both find the time and energy to get it written/illustrated.

Off for an ultrasound tomorrow hoping they can find the cancer alright for the op next week. Will need to have a wire put in (eek!) on the actual day so they can spot it. The wire insertion can't possibly be worse than having the biopsy (can it??!!). NB please don't tell me if it is worse!

Wondering whether to tell FIL the news before his holiday next week, or when he comes back which will be after the op. He buried MIL less than three weeks ago - she died of cancer - so we're trying to be sensitive to his feelings.

On the other hand I think he will be hurt if we don't tell him so that he can offer his support, to dh particularly, even if it's via his mobile from the poolside. But I don't want to spoil his holiday - it took courage for him to book it. Can't really win...

WWYD?

I don't know DeeScent about telling family, I struggled with mine, and I don't feel confident enough to offer advice. I am sure someone will be along in a minute to offer something useful...sorry.

The wire bit I can help with through, they did that to me, after I was under GA, so I felt nothing, no SE, no problems.....that was easy peasy. promise.

Kurri at you galloping out of the onc's consulting room.

Jane good news about the neighbours cat.

MAS that lunch sounds fab whether you create it from scratch or put it together.

KK, re you running out of the office!!

DeeScent, I had a wire guided thingywhatsit three week ago. It was an experience. Uncomfortable and fiddly and long-winded rather than painful (er except for the extra mammograms they wanted as mine was especially difficult to locate). But it was doable.
Wish I had an easy answer to the question of when to tell your FIL. I think after the holiday, but others may differ for very good reasons. How much wiill DH rely on that support? I suspect a tanned relatively unstressed FIL will be a blessing after the op?

Hi to everyone else

Been given dates for herceptin start and rads first appointment. Urk. I was enjoying this bit in between treatments. Oh well. It's all for the good.

Good to have those dates amber (even if you didn't really want to know ). Once you get the rads out of the way, things will be back to normal more or less - herceptin isn't too bad to deal with

DeeScent - when to tell family is a very tough call, especially with your FIL losing his wife so recently. I would personally be inclined to wait until he comes back, and explain you didn't want to spoil his holiday, but it's very hard - we held off telling my DD (because she was doing her A levels at the time) and she still suspects we are keeping things from her three years later. So it's hard, but I'd still think I'd hold back until he returns.

DS came over to the house while we were away and has placed a bottle of Chianti in the fridge for us, - I have brought the boy up well!

anyone?

Cor yes please

Sparkle and amber, I think that's reassuring re the wire .

They said they'd do the wire before the op so I'm not sure if I will be completely out of it. They say I can have a couple of paracetamol beforehand, so think I will be conscious.

Not sure why they didn't give me painkillers before the NINE mammos I had last week over the space of three hours, two of which I had to stay in for many minutes while they did the biopsies. Ladies, I was thoroughly traumatised, though the staff were very kind.

One lovely nurse tried to distract me mid-mammo by demonstrating how professional bra-fitters pull forward the boob into the bra cup to create a better shape. "Really?!", I gurgled in appreciation as I lay sideways in agony.

Do the tattoos hurt?

Will let dh make the final decision re FIL. Not an easy call.

With me, they said the same thing re the wire and the op, but I was wide awake for the wire thingy. They ultrasounded the boob, then once they found where the marker was, injected me with local anaesthetic several times (which is a bit ow at first) and then did the wire, then put a dressing over the wire end that sticks out (it's very thin wire so bendy), then did the mammograms to check it really was in position. Then I went for the operation an hour or two after that.

deescent - a couple of paracetamol ??? Absolute madness isn't it ? That was the pain relief I was offered in hospital after I had had my entire boob chopped off !!!
Mind you , I was so numb I really didn't need much more than that .

When I went for my mammogram she took one look at me and said "I'll go get the bigger plates"

I had my biopsies done under ultrasound , but my lump was pretty huge so didn't take much finding .

Waves empty glass at kk hopefully ...

mas - that lunch sounds delish . I would eat buffet style like that every day given the choice .

what a good idea - yes please!
amber the bit between has been good. though i have my dates to start rads too :( will be good to get it done though.
dee the tatoos did not hurt. having my arm at a funnyangle wasn't comfy, but doable. I didn't tell my mum until after i got path reports after op. didn't wan't her to have the uncertainty as she is v frail. She understands why and is ok about it now.