*TAMOXIFEN* the 5th

[MaryAnnSingleton]

in case we forget and find ourselves at 1000 - here's a fresh new thread !

lol at the yeo valley rap- i've downloaded the ringtone to pass around

Surfer dude is a distant dream, as so far, he refuses to swim without his arm bands.

Cakes, eye problems are unusual apparently - when I asked my Onc, he laughed heartily, saying 'well you do like to be a bit different now don't you'. I do so like to amuse the medics. Gives me a purpose in life...

Billy Bookcase is funny. What a great job though, thinking of absurd names for flatpack. Might suggest that to DS, as surely you don't need a degree or to be able to swim, or even to be a girl. Ticks every box.

On the Yeo ad, I definitely like the owl best!Blimey, farmers didn't look that clean when I knew them in Northumberland. Hope RWU's are equally charming and can sing too. Good luck RWU.

Yuk, toe-nails. Glad I've missed that SE on my regime. However I have 2 visitors this w/e and one of them had her toe nail removed recently so no doubt I'll get all the gory details. (She's my friend who has Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma.)

I have always cried easily - at my girls' school no-one ever wanted to stand next to me at end of term if a teacher was leaving as they knew I'd be blubbing! Mind you a friend is worse - she goes into floods at the end of every school year at the thought her boys are moving up a year!!

Cupcaked - thinking of going back to work is daunting. I'm really glad I've been able to take October as annual leave, and that I'll have a phased return. I have been into the office twice recently and actually I think that helps a bit as you can see some colleagues and feel the environment again in a friendly way. But I am a bit worried about it as I was always very work-focussed and now I need to pace myself better, try not to stress etc. And I do find my job demanding - managing a team of six, and dealing with some difficult issues, esp. with looming cuts and all sorts of change (again). There'll be redundancies to handle and possibly a lot of outsourcing out of local government. The fact that I hope to retire in 4 years does help, although if the pension scheme changes I might not be able to do so......I haven't been in local government very long so my pernsion from there is not huge but it is significant for our retirement. Anyway health has to be our priority doesn't it.

Actually the most difficult thing is that because of massive changes the year before I was ill, I am not returning to the manager and team I knew well and I miss them. My team has been great over the past year though - they've really risen to the challenge without me. (They're looking forward to my return however, so that's a relief)

Have a good w/e everyone. I have 2 visitors till MOnday or Tuesday. Beds are made, flowers arranged and fridge full

Good idea to save now for uni. Wish we had done that. Suppose we can still start now for DS but its a bit hard having DD's rent to pay every month at the same time!

how were your young farmers today RWU ?
I have eaten my lunch Mindfully (one of the homework tasks this week) usually I eat if alone at the computer or reading-generally dropping crumbs everywhere and making the keyboard sticky. This time I ate without distractions and tried to just think about what I was doing -not so easy...was a nice lunch though - a salad with feta and sundried toms..I have to do my 40 mins of 'body scan' each day- yesterday I lay on ds's bed and listened to the cd there- you tour around your body,concentrating on every bit and if you have any intrusive thoughts you must send them politely on their way,acknowleding them,but not paying them any heed - I find it very hard. I also got very chilly.
Enjoy your visitors SR and hope everyone has a very lovely weekend.

We used to do that at yoga, MAS, though not for 40 minutes

It is really hard. Usually all I can think about is how my back hurts and that someone in the room has DEFINITELY farted. One time I actually heard it, and I got the giggles, which is definitely frowned upon by yoga afficionados (I imagine that is spelled wrong). I guess I have a long way to go when it comes to mindfulness.

Mindfullness has a connection with the recommendations for post-chemo life then. One of the recs (can't remember where I saw this) is NOT to multi-task, but to do one thing at a time. Quite hard for me as I tend to do several things at once which is of course a female strength as we all know, but perhaps it does lead to stress and (esp for those of us over 50) I suspect doing one thing at a time would be calmer. (But would we get everything done?)

MAS - I think you need a supply of blankets to avoid getting chilly.

I've been on Arimidex for 2 weeks now and am OK so far. I still get very thirsty though, like when I was on chemo. Maybe chemicals are still in system. Still, I'd rather be thirtsy than have to pick up toe-nails all over the place (Sorry!) [Grin]

I got my days mixed up.... It's tomorrow that the young farmers are coming- today they were all fencing apparently!

RWU !
I did my 40 mins - it's a bit boring to be perfectly honest-I can't feel terribly enthusiastic about my toe bones (toenails for Cakes,if she were doing it) and I get distracted by wondering where our teachers accent is from-she has a lovely voice - well spoken but with slight inflexions (she has lived in France for years- perhaps it's this ?) You aren't meant to try too hard-if your mind wanders you have to gently bring it back again..
I just want to do it right !
The farting is disconcerting- a friend told me that people do that a lot in yoga - I'd die of embarrassment ! I'd giggle if anyone did it too

they've arrived they were here at 8.15 in the blardy morning ready to rip out the kitchen........ i hadn't even managed to feed the kids so dh has taken them into the village to get something from the bakery and the great kitchen demolishment has begun i shall report back once they have finished banging

they're keen ! lie low and it'll soon be over

Hope the kitchen is looking fab now RWU.

40 minutes of mindfulness. Definitely in awe.

I hope everyone has had a good weekend. Mine was a revelation. I have managed to get to 48 without ever being measured for a bra and, since BC diagnosis, have been having a right old game trying to sort out what i should wear. Anyway, on a friend's advice I went to Bravissimo. I can really recommend it, whether you have had a lumpectomy or a mastectomy I'd say it's worth a try. And it's official. For all the bra sizes I have worn, NONE of them have ever been right

If my boobs had faces, they'd be smiling (though the left one would have more of a lopsided grin)

aww,am glad you have happy smiling bosoms in their new bra ! I've only ever been measured once when i was pregnant...am too shy to go again...
hope kitchen (and young farmers) are all shipshape

Hello please cn I pop in an ask if any of you ladies have been on taxotere or know anything about it? My mum has metastatic breast cancer that has spread to the bone. She was on taxol but they had to stop it because she was getting too toxic on it (black hands and feet and generally unwell). She is very reactive to drugs in general.

My mum has now had 2 doses of an 8 dose course of taxotere and after each of them has fainted 3 days in and has ended up in hospital due to appallingly low blood pressure (systolic of 60), a fever and her blood chemistry all over the place. She is wondering if it's even worth continuing as she feels so foul. Is this normal or just her body over-reacting do you think?

Do you know roughly how long the good spell after taxotere is guestimated to be? I think that would help wtih decision making.

Hi Remember

I am sorry to say I have no experience of taxotere, but I just wanted to say - your poor Mum That sounds awful. I hope someone will pop up with some more useful information (maybe one of the lurkers, I don't THINK any of the regulars took taxotere but i could be wrong) but in hte meantime I would say the BC nurse is going to be a great source of information, never be afraid to call her, it is what she is for. And also you could perhaps try the MacMillan website. People do fight shy of that a bit as they tend to think MacMillan is for end of life care, but that is not true. They support people with cancer at any stage, and are a fab source of information.

I hope someone comes along with better information, but in the meantime I'd just say welcome to the thread, sorry you have to be here but we'll try to be a support.

Helllo RememberToPlaywiththeKid. So sorry your mum's having such a horrible time. Cakes is right, as her BC Nurse should be a good advocate. Meantime, am not sure if I can help, but I had 3 x Taxotere as part of my chemo and have just finished (hooray!).

Taxol and Taxotere are v.closely related, so I'd guess that's why they moved her from one to the other. Taxol is given weekly, Taxotere every three weeks. Just so you can compare, I found the first 10 days of each 3 week cycle on Taxotere tough, then felt progressively better until the next round. I'm guessing your mother fainting after 3 days is about when the steroids leave her body. They won't give you the drug unless you take the steroids as they counter an allergic reaction. Trouble is that the steroids have a profound effect, which might explain why she suddenly collapses. I just felt extremely tired at that point, but surely the Oncologists can find a way of helping her so she doesn't collapse?! I know some women taper off their steroids rather than bluntly stopping, so possibly something like that could help her.

From a distance, I'd guess her/ your best option is to try and nail her Oncology team - could you go to an appointment with her - or maybe you already do that? I'm not sure where she is, but my team would always see me if I called and needed a chat, so could you set that up asap?

On a positive note, her body reacting so strongly might well mean it's blitzing the cancer, so maybe suggesting that to her might cheer her up. I know my Oncologist cheered me when I was on my knees, by saying that.

One last thought, but a fair few women have their doses of the drugs decreased. My Onc told me that if I kept on taking the drugs at the strength they'd initially prescribed, I'd be seriously ill as it was obvious they were giving me what in effect was an overdose. To be fair to them, all they can do is guess how much to give each person based on an individual's weight and height. They can't tell until you've taken it how much the drug will hit you. My dose was decreased by 20% and after that, though I still had strong side effects they didn't hospitalise me, so they might decide to do that for your mother.

Really hope she gets some help soon. She's been horribly unlucky to have such a grim start to it all. Wish her my best, and feel free to ask any questions you want to. I'm sure we'll all try and help if we can.

Am wiped out just typing all of the above! Think Pennies had the delightful Taxotere too - are you still out there Pennies?? Hope you're okay.

But RWU, how's the kitchen? Are there any Young Farmers left to cheer you? Am guessing you're horizontal after chemo, but hope the kitchen's perfect and putting a smile on your face.

MAS, you most definitely can't be mindful if you're cold. Get under that duvet I say - though then again, if it was me I'd probably nod off.. Forty minutes is a commitment. I'll applaud loudly if you mange it, so you'll have to let us know.

Cakes, hooray for properly supported breasts! Must do that measuring thing, as I'm guessing I'd find similar.

Hope everyone had a sunny weekend. I went to the pub for a half of lager with friends on Friday night and they poured two whole pints down me. Felt like a very bad mistake by Saturday morning, but hugely life enhancing on Friday night.

RWU is joining the WI - at least it sounds as though she is,baking bread and making jam already !!
I have done my 40 mins every day - I can't admit to managing to be able to just be in the present moment through all of it,and sometimes I nearly fall asleep. I have a nice new cushion and fleecy blanket though...

Ah, retail therapy, MAS. Now that's the way to go.

Who needs mindfulness training when there are shops?

No shopping for me though - broken tooth is going to cost £198, and the toe is going to cost a nice round £200. It's car insurance renewal week as well

How can a toe cost £200!? Blimey Cakes, we'll be sending you food parcels next.

crikey !!

Thank you Smee - that was an extremely helpful post and makes total sense.

I messed up - it was xeloda that mum was on before the taxotere. It was going to be taxol but they went straight on to taxotere as the cancer seemed to accelerate pretty quickly. She will ow be going on to taxol as per plan A instead of continuing with the taxotere.

We're all feeling a bit gloomy beause she had a call saying that she is now eligable for a grant thing as she is now terminally ill, with the definition being 6 months of life. Less than 6 months ago, the consultant was saying that he'd be surprised if she wasn't still going after 5 years. He's being very non commital but other oncologists that she sees when he's not around seem to be painting a rather different picture. I wonder whether he takes an optimistic approach so as not to frighten his patients as he believes that's not constructive or something.

Remember- sorry to here about your mum and what sounds to be a horrific experience, if it helps at all I have been on special rules re terminal illness for 13 months ( ie I've already done 7 months longer than I was expected to at one point) and believe me I'm not ready to give in yet! Taxotere and taxol are nasty especially in combos, has your mum got a Mac nurse? They can be extremely helpful.

RTPWTK - am also very sorry to hear about your mum but glad that smee was able to help - lots of good thoughts to her
Also,RWU is a shining example of living and coping with a terminal diagnosis- she is quite amazing and has been through the mill and more.

RTPWTK, that's so sad and must be very hard for you as well. If the outlook's really that dire, I can see why your mother might want not to add horrible drugs / side effects into her life. Surely the Oncologists can give her some straighter answers though. All sounds cruelly confusing to me. I think RWU's right - a Macmillan Nurse might be the way to go.