End of Year 13: Results, Summer and plans for September and onwards

[Rollergirl11]

Noticed the current thread is almost full so thought I better start a new one for discussing results day and our DC’s plans for uni/gap years or anything else!

@Penguinsa wow thats dedication rowing in the snow. Its going fast now.

@SooperOuting Glad your DD has signed up for a house and its all sorted.

@PumpkinKnitter thanks DD1 is back now in Manchester so she missed all the snow, but DD2 made a snowman with friends on campus. shes been doing exams this month.

DD2 has signed up for a studio. I say studio its more like a bedsit as its much bigger and has washer dryer in there so they are saving money on having no more circuit laundry.
It is a shock to the system when its from zero to 100% with our YP and relatives. DD1 is at her b/f and his mums christmas day. DD2 will be with us christmas day morning, but will be just the three of us. So we all picked a date we are together and its the 14th of December, so plan to go to the local beefeater for a festive menu with the DD's their boyfriends and mum and dad. Followed by national lampoons christmas vacation at ours with some chocs nibbles and drinks. We wont be here for new years. Last time it was just me and the other half watching James Bond, riveting i know lol. few days later we booked a cruise and will be partying on that instead. So we leave christmas day afternoon to airport hotel and fly on boxing day.

@MirandaWest sounds lovely, enjoy the trip and festive choir :) and thats good shes sorted a place for next year too

I've seen a fair bit of ds who seems to be coping well with the workload and his social life seems to be picking up too. Still not a lot of action on applying for casual or part time work or vacation schemes which worries me slightly. He officially finishes term mid Dec but that week is quite light so he might come back a bit earlier. We'll wait for him to return before putting the tree up. He has exams on his return so will be fitting in some revision over the break.

Met up with DD for lunch - turns out there’s two groups who are going for the same house so need to keep fingers crossed

Shes been trying to work out her Christmas plans which seem to involve a lot of travelling to see people (and a bit of seeing us!)

DD has had Oxmas and we already had an early Christmas here as thought I would be away at Christmas but now flights have been pushed back to mid January to give me more time to take it easy physically after surgery. So just ordered the real Christmas meal. She is home in a week and a half, can't wait to have her back. We are all decorated already and Floof is asking for jingle bells all the time and bouncing his tail and the heater all the time, keeps bashing it to get it put on.

I don't think DD is planning to work over Christmas which is very unusual for her, worked so much during A levels though am glad she isn't as she has exams mid January.

DD had her first formal this week which she enjoyed, although she’s not so fond of dressing up 😂

We have forked out for deposit for Y2 house. It’s weird this involved but not involved thing, although she seems much more interested in our opinions than DS has ever been. Keeping a distance from it all and fingers crossed served us well with DS but DD likes a bit more advice. That’s why when I sometimes see threads on MN advocating doing things as a parent only one way it seems very reductive - DC are individuals with individual needs so we all parent accordingly, even when they are adults.

Going to be weird and wonderful having them back for a month or more at Christmas, have got used to not cooking and everything being calm! Super excited to have them home but have a strong suspicion I’ll be tearing my hair out by January…..

I was feeling a bit wistful last night, under somewhat strange circumstances! I was putting the recycling out and wondered if I'd got the wrong week as there was so little in the bin. I wasn't wrong, it's just I'm used to it practically overflowing by collection day when the whole family is at home.
DS is coming home next weekend for a social event. It seems a bit extravagant given it is only 2 weeks before the end of term but he really wants to go. I suspect the motivation is probably the fact that one of the other guests is a friend of my DH's who has lots of industry contacts of interest to DS rather than that he's desperate to spend time with DH and me, but I'm not complaining!
And I've just had a date through for some surgery I've been awaiting for a while - a few days before Christmas! I'll have a full house that week but they're going to be disappointed if they think they're coming home to be waited on. It will have to be the other way round this year!

@SooperOuting remind me where your DD is a student, please? Just checking, as DD is convinced she'll be having formals at Exeter but I'm not convinced. Aren't they more a feature of the collegiate universities? DD has a wardrobe full of LBDs so hoping they will get an outing when she goes to uni next year.

Good luck with your upcoming surgery @MrsAvocet . Hoping you get lots of TLC over the festive season, from your family.

Fitting in work with studying at Oxford seems to be super tricky @Penguinsa . It somehow seems more full-on at Oxford than at Cambridge, although not sure why. DN had an exam the day after he started back in October. He always seems to be revising so doesn't seem to have sufficient downtime to be working during the vacs (other than the long one). He is very good with his money though so never seems to need the extra! Good to hear that you're in full-festive mode already. Our Christmas tree will go up tomorrow. Can't wait.

I’ve PM’d you

@LouisCatorze DD is at Exeter and they don’t have formals like Oxbridge and Durham do. But they do have some society balls. DD went to an English society Xmas ball on Monday where the theme was Great Gatsby/black tie. But that’s very much dependent on the society’s.

2 more weeks and then DD is home. It was my birthday on Wednesday and felt really strange DD not being here. We will put our tree up next weekend and that will be weird as DD is usually a big part of that.

DD is enjoying the run up to Christmas in Exeter. There are Xmas markets and an ice rink and the centre is all very pretty. There was a day at the races event last weekend that is a big thing that apparently everyone goes to but it got postponed because of the storm.

Next years accommodation sorted, contract signed and deposit paid. 8 of them in a house together I think will be utter chaos but it’s up to them.

I can’t believe that we are almost at the end of the first term. I keep thinking about what we were doing this time last year. DD was really stressed with UCAS early app, Cambridge application and subsequent interview, mocks and NEA‘s all battling for importance. This year has been a whirlwind.

Nice to catch up with people's news, finding a second year house in your first term with people you have only just met sounds stressful! DS will be home next weekend for Christmas and not back until 18th January - crazy short terms. Very very full on though, he has lectures six days a week and next week three supervisions on Tues, Wed and Fri so he has loads of work to get through. He has to clear his room completely over the holidays so they can use it for conference guests etc. I'm glad we are so close as he needs some extra support. It seems so strange looking back to a year ago when he was waiting for his interview and offers from other unis.

Sooper Lovely your DD enjoyed the formal and has a house sorted for next year.

MrsA Glad you have a surgery date through and enjoy having DS home this weekend.

Louis DD doesn't find the amount of work high at O but think it varies by subject (science / engineering seems to be the ones with high workloads) and the terms are so short, 9 weeks. She had a month before starting O when her boyfriend was at university and could work then as the constant parties reduced. You aren't allowed to work in term time but its so short and full of rowing, course, social things its fine. I think she will need to study over the Christmas holidays but they are really long 6 weeks I think and there are exams on return. She will still socialise a lot but not sure she will do her job as its seasonal pay so in the summer they earn lots more. I have been surprised how little work she is doing there though it may just be what she talks about, its all rowing, parties, formals, balls (just planning atm) and unusual traditions there some involving port and the other students though she is so busy in term time its hard to get in touch with her and when you do she's always on her way back from rowing or on her way to a party / formal / bbq. We only really got news when she cut her finger which stopped her rowing. Nice to have the Christmas tree up.

Happy birthday Rollergirl Glad your DD is loving Exeter.

Good to hear from you again Ithink and good to hear your DS is getting on well at Cambridge. Hope the move goes well next weekend and hope your DS helps with the packing but have an asd one myself and not sure he has ever packed anything, we are also doing next weekend for DD, 7th I think. She will do all packing herself and can leave the mini fridge there.

I'm now starting new job wfh so will be here for Christmas now and so DD will have her 3rd Christmas here on the usual day, we had one here then she had Oxmas. Am just ordering for that, all decs done. We saw the botanic lights in Cambridge yesterday they are lovely and had tarteflette which French DH was very happy to see and hot chocolates with cream and lovely walk round and met neighbours there so chatted to them in cafe. Looking forward to having DD home, not sure when her boyfriend is back from Bristol though at least they aren't too far apart.

DD arrived home last night for 3 weeks. I’m so happy to have her back. DD is happy to be home with a clean, full fridge, an abundance of toilet roll and food on tap. Her words. 😂 She has already requested a trip to M&S Food so she can salivate over all the stuff she can’t afford to buy herself!

DS is home tonight too and I have a lovely warm fuzzy feeling chilling on the sofa with DH knowing both of my babies are here. I don’t normally get all slushy but am feeling it this evening. 🥰

Hope everyone is enjoying having their DC’s home or doesn’t have long to wait if they’re not back yet.

Happy birthday @Rollergirl11 !

Ds is home for nearly a month. DH went up in DS's car to get him and ds drove home. He's bought plenty of washing with him!

Nobody home yet here. DS1 finished term today but is staying for a few more days to work on his final year project so will be home on Tuesday night. DS2 is in the middle of exams and won't be home til next Friday. Then my DD, her fiancé and dog arrive on Christmas Eve so we'll have a very full house. I need to get as much Christmas prep done as possible next week as I'm having an operation on the 20th. I'm usually very much a last minute person, wrapping presents at midnight on Christmas Eve, so it goes against the grain to be planning ahead but I'm not quite sure how quickly I'll be mobile afterwards so don't want to leave too much to chance. I'll have plenty of helpers on the day anyway!

My DS isn't home yet either although he finished on Thursday to all extents and purposes. He's in a good mood because he had an essay (the first one) marked and got a good mark. I'm relieved about that because I was worried he might be so focused on partying he'd forgotten the reason he was there in the first place!

I'm trying to catch him on the phone today to make sure he remembers to do basics like throw away food, wash up, clean toilet and shower (he's in an ensuite), because he probably won't have thought about those things!

He's off to his grandparents tomorrow for the night before coming home on Monday in time for his college presentation night where he's picking up two awards which is lovely.

MrsAdvocet all the best for your surgery on the 20th. I'd be prepping like you in the same circumstances. I actually did do the wrapping the other morning because we seem to have loads on in the run up to Christmas this year, this is highly unusual for me as I'm also normally a Christmas eve wrapper!

Other than that we are late for Christmas, I'm just waiting for a delivery then I'm going to go and fetch a tree so that we have one up in time for DS's return.

Hope surgery goes well MrsAvocet.

DD has been home a week now and lovely to have her back. She did go to Bristol for a couple of days to see her boyfriend who is local to us but studying there and they came back here together. DH brought her back and sent me a message to say I am having to wait whilst DD says goodbye to 4,537 new friends. She's back around 15th January.

All the best for your surgery @MrsAvocet

I am usually very organised for Christmas but been struggling a bit this year. All DS's presents seem pretty boring so far like clothes, I feel like I want to get him something fun but don't know what - anybody got any good suggestions? I know he will get money from grandparents so I'd like to get him something to unwrap.

We're in the same situation @IThinkIMadeItWorse.

Ds is sporty so I was thinking a piece of sports equipment but then I'm bound to get the wrong size or make which will be an expensive mistake. Ds doesn't want aftershave or toiletries. So far, I just have clothes, pyjamas and new slipper socks and the Private Eye Annual. Not very exciting at all. We are going to a production over Xmas that he wanted to see but ideally I'd like a few more things for under the tree.

DD has finished but is currently in London seeing various theatre things with a friend she met at choral scholarship auditions in Oxford last September and neither of them then got an Oxford place. They’ve kept in touch all along, met a couple of times and now despite friend being at St Andrews and DD at Bristol they are in touch a lot 😊

She'll be back on Monday, around for a few days including school awards on Wednesday then off to see boyfriend on 21st to 23rd then up to see her dad in Edinburgh and back here on Christmas Eve. (DS will be back tomorrow then off with a friend to London and coming back on Tuesday. He will also go to Edinburgh and they’ll both come back here together).

Then off to see extended family on 27th, back here on the 30th and then DDs BF coming here New Year’s Eve for a few nights, Think DD is going back around 6th January. No idea about DS!

Thanks for the good wishes all. This will be my 6th operation on the same leg in the last 5 years and I'm very much hoping it's the last!
Re Christmas presents, not a big thing but I have bought DS a Mystery Guide to his University city - looks like it might be quite a fun thing to do with friends next term.
https://www.mysteryguides.co.uk/

Presents wise DD is mainly rowing kit and cash and bits and pieces like candles, biscuits etc. DS has an iPad and F&M things like hot choc, Christmas biscuits, Turkish delights, he loves hand creams etc, the floral ones and mini perfumes, he's also been searching for coffee makers so we are getting one of those.

We got ds a velvetiser from Hotel Chocolat last Xmas which he loves and has taken with him.

Yes all the best for your surgery on the 20th @MrsAvocet.

Gosh @MirandaWest your DD is packing a lot in!

What a considerate parent you are @lifeturnsonadime with reminding your son to clear things before he goes. There are 2 boys in DD’s flat who have left meat and milk that is already off in the fridges while they have gone home for Xmas. One of them has had his bike in the hallway for weeks making it hard for DD to actually get out of her door. I wish he’d had a parent telling him what is acceptable!

@IThinkIMadeItWorse and anyone else after present ideas for boys there is a really good thread running for this. I’ve managed to get a few ideas for DS (16) for stocking fillers. And one for DD too (Top Trumps Best & worst Wetherspoons)

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/christmas/5211515-have-we-got-a-stocking-filler-for-teenage-boys-thread-yet?page=1

DD now home and it is lovely to have her back. 🥰

She said she was really looking forward to coming home, but as she left said wistfully that she’s going to miss it! We had a lovely day Christmas shopping yesterday (never a sentence I thought I’d write, I’m not a great shopper!) and got her clothes gifts and she bought presents for all the family. She’s really looking forward to DS coming home tomorrow , hasn’t seen him since September. They seem to be getting closer the older they get, which is super lovely to see. 🥰🥰

Christmas presents wise, DS is having us pay for a bargain weekend away he’s doing in January as his main gift. I’ve also got him some fancy toiletries, scent, a few fancy food items including some olive oils as he’s always complaining about how much olive oil costs, a squidgy mass thing you clean a keyboard with, a terrible maps book, Japanese notepads. I’ve also got him loads of travel sized toiletries as he flies a lot with carry on only, so no large liquids allowed. DD I could have bought stuff for 5 times over!