Thread 38 Covid Cohort, After Results Day

[CinnamonOrangeCremeBrulee]

ALL our children are heroes of their own stories, they have thrived through a once in a century catastrophe and they will succeed

This is a support thread for our young adults post GCSEs 2020, regardless of their educational setting, and their results (life updates for those who went into work or have had results earlier). It is respectfully requested that all are supportive and helpful to each other. If you want to start a debate, e.g state vs private, please don't within this thread. Please also be sensitive when responding to threads about grades. It's all relative!

Some of us have been here since first thread back in yr10, some will be new. Everyone has been friendly and helpful in the past. Everyone is welcome. It is hoped this will continue.

Our DS/DD may continue down various pathways ( employment, apprenticeships, higher ed) We have decided for anyone interested they will find a thread within the Further Ed board.Possibly a move to Parent of Adult Children Board in future? Post Sept?

Previous thread

www.mumsnet.com/talk/further_education/4613457-thread-37-covid-cohort-2020-results-thread-heroes-of-their-own-stories

@crazycrofter Belated happy birthday!

@Alsoplayspiccolo It can just become all too much when carrying the caring/helping burden. Look after yourself.

@Delphigirl I would be sorely tempted to point your governor friend at this thread. All the PP with GCSE results looming will remember this thread, and the way @cheninblanc DD has been treated, in 15 months time when those DC are stating to look at potential universities.

So glad the solo Africa trip has been a success.

Delphigirl that's made me laugh! The whole thing has a been a nightmare, but I had an informative discussion with admissions today and although I don't agree with the delay or the way we've been treated I do have some understanding and am assured a decision will be reached this week. I hope so for my daughters sake tbh and I hope it's before Thursday as that should be my youngests day and yet I fear it will be overshadowed now by uni drama. Sigh!!

@mummabear74 my view would be Cardiff Uni is a great place to be, the first year will fly be and nothing is ever quite perfect in life. I would keep moving forward and take the place.

DS’s first choice was Southampton too and he didn’t get the grades, his insurance became his firm and he took it. However it really isn’t where he wants to go and we scrambled to get his 4th choice of accommodation. He is just going to keep moving forward and see how it goes.

Just my view, I’ll be interested to see what other people advise.

@Monkey2001 Not Chorlton in the end - Hulme. They had to have easy access to Royal Infirmary and Salford. Since signing on the dotted line for the flat, we've heard scary things about safety after dark in that area. If anyone who knows Manchester can offer any words of comfort, they'd be very welcome!
@mummabear74 A gap year worked well for my eldest. A year of extra maturity helped her a lot to take her course seriously and put the effort in, I think, and a lot of her friends at uni had also taken a year off for various reasons (and it wasn't the sort of uni with lots of posh public school type gap yar people). Could your DD find a job or work experience or volunteering during a year off that could help her work out what she wants and doesn't want from a uni course? I would definitely encourage that if possible.

Hi all. Tenancy stuff again....

DS1 has had deposit returned (not in full but what was agreed) and moved all stuff out. Lease ended 31 July.

The agency ahs TODAY contacted them all to say the landlord had a 'trouble ticket' from the council. This seems to have been him asking them to remove extra waste and glass which the council charged him £80 for.

The agency now wants £16 out of each of them before the 'tenancy surrender document' is given to them.

Two things : they can't ask for more money at this stage surely? Surely a landlord can absorb £80????

And, after googling this tenancy surrender only seems to apply to a tenancy which is open ended and terminated with mutual agreement, or ended early, not a fixed term one.

Any one know? I can ask in legal matters but thought you wise ones might have experience.

@cheninblanc : aghhhhh!! So furious for you! Do update us when you hear won’t you?

another one with gcse results on Friday and trying really hard not to let uni stuff overshadow her day. Fingers crossed as she’s expecting to be disappointed :-(

belated happy birthday @crazycrofter and no idea on tenancy @Piggywaspushed but it certainly sounds annoying!!

Tenancy surrender has no meaning or validity in this context. This was a fixed term tenancy which has expired and he has moved out. It is an ex-tenancy. It has ceased to be. It is the Norwegian parrot of tenancies.
ignore the letter.

Brilliant!

I thought that when they returned the deposit post inspection your liabilities would cease. Landlord can definitely absorb £80!

Also … are we the only people NOT planning an ikea trip?!? We are working on the policy he can use his own bed linen and towels; basic cookware is either already bought or can be bought in charity shops so it’s more distinctive…. What are you all buying that I’ve forgotten, or are Ds and I not invested enough in his room decor (quite possible: he is not Mr Interiors!)

@mummabear74 if I can offer insight of any use to you, both my DC we’re late receiving their ADD diagnoses. Once they were medicated it was like having a different child, DD was 16 when CAMHS finally got round to it, she was literally dead in the water till medicated and still needs high levels of meds just to function

With DS we had to go private in the end as they refused to assess even with a sibling. Again the difference is astounding but he still struggles with functional working memory

However with a diagnosis in place the support offered already massively exceeds anything they received in school, diagnosis is key to unlocking the DSA support

I don’t know if you’ve seen my other posts but this is why DD is a year behind her age group, we chose to redo some of her education to give her the best chance going forward. I would make that decision again in a heartbeat

@Isthisjustnormal When we went for DS, he bought some wooden spoons and some plans - mixture of plastic and real. That was it apart from a hotdog (which I suspect was the real reason he wanted to go!)

Lol @Monkey2001 I did think Ds might go with the offer of meatballs and mini daim, but not sure I can be bothered for wooden spoons ;-)

@mummabear74 I think it is a real waste to do a degree you are not really interested in. You only get one opportunity for a loan funded undergraduate degree and if she does not yet know what she wants to do, it is well worth taking time out to work out what she can study to take her on the next stage of a journey she can throw her heart into. I think DC get trundled along the educational conveyor belt and lots are not really ready, but schools encourage them to go because it is good for their stats and there is lots of peer pressure.

So I would sell it as an opportunity to seek diagnosis and sort out support so that when she finds something she wants to do, she can hit the ground running.

that should have said plants, not plans.

We're not either. I got some new pans in TK Maxx and everything else he can take from here. He hates decoration though.

@Isthisjustnormal Same as you. If I suggested IKEA to DS he wouldn't be remotely interested and it's an hour away. He's not bothered. His room will be full of sports kit. I'm going to buy him a throw/blanket. He's getting hand me down pots and plates from his grandparents' caravan which they have just sold. We have old duvet/bedding etc as we went from four to three bedrooms when we moved here and I kept it for sleepovers.

This is what I thought.

Loving the Norwegian Parrot analogy!

I have never been to an IKEA...

Blimey, this thread does move quickly! Went out for the day with DD.

Agree about things to decorate room probably being more important than "useful stuff" if you're in a town/city with decent stores. DD's been making and decorating cushions, but then she is an art student and that's what they do, right?

We went to IKEA for house moving boxes at the weekend, but didn’t take dd. She rang me with instructions to bring back meatballs from the shop for tea! We’re not buying anything in particular @Isthisjustnormal . I’ll get her an airer and a laundry basket but Home Bargains or B&M should have those.

Also, I still have a student hanging on for their uni place (slightly different situation to @cheninblanc but still assorted incompetence involved). However, I heard today that a different student has had their degree-apprenticeship finally confirmed; the employer really wanted them (they started in July) and pleaded successfully with the uni to accept them despite missing grades. Moral is, good news is still appearing for people.

We weren’t going to bother with Ikea till we realised we would be driving pretty close to one yesterday anyway, we had nearly run out of frozen meatballs and my DCs actually enjoy an Ikea trip. We bought new duvet and pillows so he doesn’t have to bring them home at weekends or holidays (he can use the room at Christmas and Easter), laundry and wastepaper baskets, a new pan for me, bag clips, a sock octopus and more big blue bags. Plus a load of meatballs and herrings etc from the food shop. No cooking stuff needed really just bedlinen and extension leads, chargers, stationery, mattress topper.

@Isthisjustnormal - no IKEA trip planned here- far too expensive!
@Seeline I love Educating Rita, as does DD!

@Isthisjustnormal we are not planning an Ikea trip. In mid September after a holiday we will spend a day sorting out bits. It will probably be an ASDA /wilko/ Amazon day.

He has a plant to take that he has nurtured for the last couple of years (it even has a name!) but otherwise we will go basic and buy bits and pieces as he needs them.

We also don’t know what accommodation he has been allocated yet so can’t fully sort bedding etc.

@EquallyDivided what’s a sock octopus?