Class of '18 still nattering.

[OhYouBadBadKitten]

forgot the old link hang on a mo...

Well, the deed is done. Left him at about 5 and haven't heard from him since, so no idea how he is getting on. It will be a real challenge for him with his ASD to mix, but we're hoping he will at least try.

We arranged a FaceTime with ds today (4pm). Took til 4:10 to get hold of him - still chucking up from excessive drinking games with flatmates post boxing last night! (Tbf he's not been in that state with drink since NYE 2 years ago. Let's hope this keeps him in check the next 2 years).

Heard about lectures/timetable (seems very light!), although tomorrow he's in 12-6 then rugby training in evening. He's found launderette but has no change. Really enjoyed all freshers events and getting along well with flatmates.

Had a call 2hrs later and had to give over the phone tutorial on cleaning loo (obviously missed training him in this before he left home).

I am thrilled to say that we have now received one photo of DS life at university...... Said loo, now clean and sparkly!

Well done doistay, how are you doing?

That's impressive starfleet! A lot achieved.

Oops flatmouse. Still, hopefully he's got it out of his system.

Half way through dds blanket. No chance of finishing it in time but maybe it's just as well really.

Bloody hell Starfleet. He clearly has an excellent business head!

If only he had shown such enthusiasm about stuff whilst at home.....

I've just had to send him a text to tell him and his friends to stay safe after reading about that poor boy from Worcester who is missing. I've cried thinking about why his parents must be going through.

*what not why.

I hope he is found safe and sound.

I realise that freshers week is for students to drink and party, but the way drinking huge quantities of cheap alcohol is actively encouraged by all the bars and clubs is IMO a little irresponsible. Obviously I am getting a full breakdown from DD about her boyfriend's activities, and he is drinking huge amounts of alcohol now, even though term has started. DD says he is surviving on biscuits and toast so that he can buy cheap vodka. Surely this level of drinking can't be sustainable?

It's usually drinking to excess in towns with rivers or canals that is most dangerous. Worcester isn't that far away from me and my friend's DS is a student there in his second year. Very scary and sad.

We get a lot of reports on the local news of students in the river Foss in York.

OYBBK DH has caved and texted him...apparently they went for free pizza, and three of his flatmates have gone to a party, but he hasn't gone as he doesn't really do parties. The other one is from Malaysia so has gone to bed as he's jet lagged. Biggest issue so far is that the bathroom light is on a sensor, but it doesn't reach as far as the shower cubicle, so the light goes off every 10 seconds...wouldn't normally be a problem but DS is a night showerer so bit of an issue for him!

Hadn't heard about the boy in Worcester...

This was on my FB.

Apparently a man has been arrested on suspicion of murder.

Horrific

Lonerica I wouldn't blame the bars because the irresponsibility comes back to the drinker. They have total freedom for the first time, some are living on toast and pizza, some stay up all night and some are learning what happens when you get very, very drunk. They will learn to set their own limits once they realise the value of them. Some people live charmed lives and never seem to face the consequences of their actions but most people manage to weigh up the advantages and disadvantages and find a middle way.

Why do you have to listen to a blow by blow account of what he's getting up to? If DD doesn't like the choices he's making she has a choice herself.

Agree with knitting - the responsibility is with the drinker to make good choices.
Ds is a Warwick and I have not really noticed an emphasis on getting completely drunk in freshers' week. Ds doesn't really drink - occasional cider - and has been mainly involved in sport activities rather than clubbing and bars. His flat mates are also sporty and not big drinkers.

On another note DS's maintenance loan has landed - was due on 24th September and has arrived when they said it would.

Not that it covers much but do get your DC's to check as I think everyone's was due today.

While I do think that ultimately the responsibility is on the student, I also think that it is clear that bars and clubs are taking advantage of the situation.
If you know there are lots of young people having their first taste of independence and more money than they are used to, it may be tempting to make more profit for yourself out of that situation, but it is still morally wrong.

DD's loan has landed. Yay.

Hope you are okay doi
York is a dangerous place to be a drunk student with the river
Dd feels rough she said after drinking pink gin

I've been away for three days,so great to hear everyone's experiences.

Ds1 has still been very much under the radar but at a family party two people independently said they had seen some nice My New Uni Friends pictures of him on Facebook. He has blocked us on Facebook for last two years, so it never occurred to me that he was streaming live to other more distant friends! I told them to defriend him, as it was too embarrassing to hear his socialising from afar..
Then last night we had a midnight call to say he had washed his duvet and pillows and he couldn't dry them, and what was he to do?? I asked him why on earth he had washed the entire duvet and pillows, not just the covers and cases and said "he thought that was what you were meant to do". I told him I usually washed duvets once a year and I had washed his LAST WEEK...WHY WAS HE Attempting to wash the entire batch of bedding?

So it is either naivete or vomit. The vomit didn;t occur to me till this morning but that is probably it..

Kitten ds1 and I went by public transport from London. It was hard work, harder than I thought, mostly because you cannot use boxes to transport things, more - heavy suitcases with wheels, and then you have to take the suitcases away again or they take up a lot of space in the room, and I found that squashy bags were quite difficult to pull long distances (too wobbly) when full of heavy things. But we did it. I could have done with one more person accompanying us. ie: three people to carry one person's possessions. We also did Click and Collect and I bought groceries for him when I got there. I left a long time to organise everything when i got there and I was glad of it.

Fantasy and LDrummer London is not too scary. Thnk of it as a series of villages strung along the Thames. And then some hilltop villages.

Now that I think of it ds phone call (this after radio silence of a week) went like this:"I need some money""why? You have lots? or you did 7 days ago?" "I need some money to buy a new duvet" "why do you need a new duvet?" "My duvet won't dry and nor will my pillows" "have you tried putting them in the drier?" "oh yes, for two hours" "On high heat?" "I don't know, why would I know that?" Pause. "So I cannot sleep" "Because My duvet is wet, although the cover is now dry AND IT SMELLS HORRID Wet" "So buy a new one then with your money" [circular conversation] "where from?" *Tesco Metro down the road" "where's that?" "Down the road, in East...." where's that? "where YOU ARE, YOU ARE IN East ...." "oh, but I cannot afford it". PAUSE. "Can you bring me a new one then?." [hopeful] Parent: NO. " try drying it again" Son "okay., maybe you are right, I'll try it without the rest of the items I put it in with" [mind boggles] Next morning. It is dry. "Sorry Mum" "So, how are you?" Son: Cannot talk now, tired from all the going up and down the stairs to the laundry room.

Marmite surgery is pretty horrible, it is a shock to the system even at the best of times (like when you have a baby/caesarian) I remember that horrid feeling in the shower, you just want to scuttle back to bed again, you were very brave to get up and get dressed. don't ask too much of yourself, it sounds like everyone wants to look after you, and so they should. Your dd is doing very well, I love her story about the bossy (if kindly) mum of shy flatmate! I hope she keeps the stories coming, very cheering.

Good news. Dd's Gsce Maths has been remarked and come back as a 7. (from a 6) I have a mathematical daughter, I cannot believe it [weeps, I'm very bad at Maths and so is ds2 and ds1 for that matter]

Nettles my first thought was vomit, not necessarily his though. It's all learning, maybe not the learning they went there for but valuable all the same. Congratulations on the remark too.

“He has blocked us on Facebook for last two years”

That seems a bit off Nettle. DD and her friends never post on Facebook these days. Snapchat is the preferred choice. Good news about your DD’s maths.

“I wouldn't blame the bars because the irresponsibility comes back to the drinker.”

I agree, but these are immature 18 year olds who don’t want to behave responsibly, and when bar staff come round the halls of residence offering free shots and reduced price drinks I think it is naïve to think that most students are going to turn down a night out with loads of cheap alcohol. (Because this is what happens in Glasgow)

“I also think that it is clear that bars and clubs are taking advantage of the situation.
If you know there are lots of young people having their first taste of independence and more money than they are used to, it may be tempting to make more profit for yourself out of that situation, but it is still morally wrong.”

Exactly NoHaudinMaWheest

Today's update, prompted by me texting him:

Introductory lectures: boring & pointless; they didn't tell him anything he didn't already know.

Appointment with disability services: "Crap - I forgot to go."

Flatmates: a couple of them have not yet been spotted. The ones he has met are nice.

Last night's Fresher's welcome party: actually OK, better than expected - he only got 2 hours sleep.