New Year 12 starters parent support thread (snappy title eh?)

[OhYouBadBadKitten]

here we are.

Thank you all for your kind wishes about the job. They had a lot of applicants and I'm really chuffed to get it.

The injured DC has second degree burns, so healing is not going to happen overnight.

TheSecond a bittersweet week for you then? A week with a trip to A&E is never a good one, it must have taken the shine off the job offer. Huge congratulations on that, it feels good to have the recognition. It's still early in the term for DS1 to be balancing work and play, mine says that there's not been much homework yet so he may have more spare time now.

No job for DS, it would interfere with his musical stuff and that's more important as that's what he's thinking of taking further. We have enough on shoehorning everything in to the weekend as it is without making space for hypothetical jobs.

Ouch second burns are really sore. Hope your dc makes a full recovery. Congrats on the new job.

TheSecond - hope your injured DC recovers well.

Congrats on your job offer

Strongone - I was willing your DS's English Lang to go up to the next grade. Harsh this year with the new review system.

DS has had a bit of a wobble this evening and asked if it's too late to change one of his subjects.

He was having a bad afternoon - very early start for school football this morning after a 2 day away trip so he was still tired and had missed two periods of Biology, Chemistry and Maths over Thursday and Friday so has a fair bit to copy up. He is usually so laid back he could be horizontal most of the time. I've just bought him a chocolate orange which I'm hoping will help with the grumpy mood he's in!

Thanks Star, DS wasn't worried though, still an A. He was more pleased than I had anticipated about Electronics going up a grade though, to soften any disappointment.

I would cheer up over a chocolate orange, fond memories of Easter presents from my DF!. Do you think it was the tiredness playing a part, or a real, more serious wobble about his subject choice?

TheSecond, what a range of emotion this week for you, you must be exhausted. Of course huge congratulations on the job, a real sense of achievement, but tough for your DC.

Interesting chat about jobs. It's a tough one. On the one hand, it's surely 'A Good Thing' to show commitment and enthusiasm for independence etc, on the other, eating into study time. I have friends who have funding the whole of Uni and regretted it, others that it helped enormously.

I always always worked, no one found the jobs for me, or took me to them, I just did it, and did 4 A Levels. We had no money, I wanted money!! My own DC can see we are relatively affluent, and I do wonder if this subconscious difference. Times are different too I guess.

I've suggested DS look for Christmas work though, as I can't see the harm in that, and may even help deal with any shyness. I suspect I will have to push it along a bit for it to happen!

ouch TheSecond. Be prepared for the itching stage, which is indescribable, Keeping the affected area cool really helps with it, I ended up sleeping with a very very wrapped up ice pack on the area.

I hope your ds feels less grumpy today StarFleet.

Can I ask advice again from you guys? As parents of Y12, 16/17 y/o?

DS wants to apply for a residential course, it's pretty much based on potential uni subjects, STEM related. Looks great. He WANTS to do it, might I just emphasise this?

He's hesitating applying, and has given me all sorts of reasons why he hasn't so far, when applications are now open for 2017. Finally, after gentle talk and persuasion, it's because he is fearful of spending 3 days, on his own, with loads of other students, that he doesn't know. Shyness, basically, in the extreme.

We've talked a lot about the fear of the unknown being bigger than the thing itself. That when he goes to Uni, he will be with 1000's of students he doesn't know, and accepts this. I've gently highlighted that the students will have a shared interest. He wants to do it! But still hasn't written the initial email.

He will write the email if I push him to do so. I don't know whether I should push him to or not. He would spend the rest of his life in his room, while the world seems more scary every day if he doesn't confront fear.

I wouldn't make him do it if he didn't WANT to, that's not the issue here if you understand?

Thanks.

I would frame an email for him, then ask him to put it into his own then ask to be bcced when he sends it. Remind him that at any point after he has applied, he can back out, at the moment he isn't committing himself, he's just expressing an interest.

If it is for next summer, then point out that he'll be that much more mature and confident by then.

I'd draft the bones of an email for him to send. I'd also point out that all those other students will be in the same situation of not knowing anyone there and practise a few conversational openers ("have you come far?", "where are you thinking of applying to?").

have you come far? seems to work for the Queen.

For a Year 12 student, "What A-level subjects are you doing?" might work.

Can you help him with the email need
DD has gone back with lots of work incomplete due to another weekend filled with period cramps but she has a triple free tomorrow

I would really encourage him to apply Strong. He can back out at any time but may regret not applying.

Sounds like a great opportunity for him strongone. What if he jotted down some bullet points first and then worked them into an email (with your help?).

Slightly less grumpy DS today. His football team won a cup game this morning and a family party this afternoon. The wobbly subject homework didn't seem as daunting today, he emailed his teacher to ask for some clarification on one part and she has said she will see him early morning before school starts to go through it with him. Tiredness was the greater part of the bad mood. Almost toddler like.

Thanks all. At least a consensus of opinion, also in agreement with my own opinion. I just wondered if I was being pushy with him.

I had already drafted the bones of an email and saved it when I posted, but the act of doing this had lead me to ask the question.

I have much of the above already to him, but not about all the other students feeling exactly the same, good point.

I am going to sit with him today after school.

I'm glad your DS is feeling less tired and grumpy Star. Hopefully the teacher will explain the homework issue too.

Hello all, I've only just caught up with this thread (had been looking for it in 'SecoNdary Education'. Haven't had time to read through it yet but obviously plenty going on!

DS seems to be taking sixth form in his stride, except that he's managed to lose his schoolbag with his tablet inside! I say lose, but it looks as if it's been stolen. He left it lying around the school grounds (he does it all the time and so does everyone else). An email was sent round but no response.

I did add it to our insurance a year or two ago, but what are the chances of them paying out on a tablet that was left where anyone could pick it up?

I have some good news for once DD has written an article about Brexit and it's going to be published! Yay!

Wow Fantasy! That's fantastic, huge well done to your DD

Muffin what a horrible thing to happen, not a good start
Glad to hear your ds is getting on well apart from that though.

Strongone my DD is shy and a bit socially awkward - her part time jobs have definitely helped her confidence, I think just the practise of having to talk to lots of different people.
But she still feels most intimidated in groups of her peers.
What's worked for her on recent occasions has been total honesty - telling people how awkward she feels as an ice breaker - she says others always join in and agree and they compare stories of awkwardness!
Sounds a bit daft but seems to work for her!

Oh no muffin how rubbish.

Well done to your DD F&H

That's horrid muffin. I hope it turns up or the insurance pays up. Dd similarly "lost" her (MY!!!!!) flute last week. It did turn up 2 days later in Starbucks, where dd had left it under the table when they went there for lunch. I wish there were more lockers available, so many kids seem to have expensive things at school/college and nowhere secure to keep them.

Well done to your dd fantasy, that's amazing!

Well done fantasy's DD.

And at bag/tablet theft. What a rubbish way to start the year. DS's school have plenty of lockers (all with charging points in them for tablets and laptops), which is good because otherwise DS1 would lose everything immediately.

Bag thefts are horrible Thankyou all for the well done's. DD is incredibly proud as it's a career she may consider