The military shouldn't have children

[scaryteacher]

...current boarding thread on AIBU - someone has just suggested that the military shouldn't have kids. Come and help!

They must have been curiously unaware of world events. The Falklands Conflict in 1982 reminded everyone big time of the risks, and NI was dangerous at the time.

I haven't even bothered looking as an ex "Pad brat" since birth, followed by becoming a squaddie, married and had children with a squaddie - my head would surely explode. Ooo went to boarding school too. Nope will deffo stay away.

Actually, if her friends were really like that, it probably explains a lot!

That boarding school thread really annoyed me. I've decided to stay away from it now...

I hate military bashing too. I know what the world thinks of our (American, I mean) politics and military, but...

There are dangerous people in this world. Dangerous, crazy people who get lots of other people to follow them. We need trained professionals to deal with these people, and that's just the way it it.

"People sleep peaceably in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf."

-- George Orwell

"Every man thinks meanly of himself for not having been a soldier, or not having been at sea. "

-- Samuel Johnson

People mock and denigrate that which they do not understand.

Given that MrsChips grew up in Plymouth - home of the RN, and also home to the biggest Naval dockyard in Europe, you'd think they'd have realised.....

LOL Just goes to show the boneheads that join up then......................and they all went into the army or air force...................and even though it WAS the home of the Navy I never knew anyone in the Navy or from a Naval family.

Rudyard Kipling summed up the attitude of most of civvy street towards the military over a hundred years ago:

^O it's Tommy this, an' Tommy that, an' "Tommy, go away";
But it's "Thank you, Mister Atkins", when the band begins to play.^

I do not think it is the biggest anymore, I may be wrong though....Most people in Plymouth are not interested in the Navy.

Not on mn a lot but just seen this and wanted to add my little view! Not military bashing!

My dad was in the army, left after 23 years when I was about 18/19 year old

I knew by the time I was 13 years old I wouldn't want that sort of life as an army wife or for any of my future children to go through

Myself and my brother weren't sent to boarding schools. Not sure of my brothers totals but I went to 8 primary schools and 4 secondary schools and I know my exam results would have been better if I had at least been in one secondary school. Sometimes we were only posted in places for less than a year, horrible having to make friends at new schools all the time

I have no sense of roots and don't actually come from anywhere,never able to have a 'normal' childhood seeing relatives on a regular basis etc

DH working all night and all weekend here too, it's busy at the mo isn't it!?

I'm avoiding that thread like the plague, I'm too tired to get wound up. I do think though that if we can moan anywhere on mn about stuff then surely this topic is the place. All this 'can't stand the heat' business is just silly, everyone whinges about life sometimes.

purple I have no roots/childhood friends within visiting distance but we weren't a military family, some of us just draw the short straw in some respects. I agree with trying to keep children in the same secondary school if possible though (I was in the same one but in a different country unfortunately!)

kind of went on my little rant there didn't I?! :o

I admit I often have my blinkers on and think that all non military families are the opposite of what I grew up with, and forget that isn't always the case!

Yea, I agree. I always think I'd have loved to have stayed in the same place and have childhood friends in the same country but DH had just that and he sees his old friends less than I do even though most of my old friends are in the States.

Yes, when I have moaned to friends in the past, they have said they had the life I kind of wanted and don't have the closeness I thought they would have had!

I think it made me more sort of friendly as I had to

Oh, when my dad left the army, what a culture shock that was for me!! I honestly didn't know how to ask for a bus ticket, and paying to go swimming?! Most annoyed at that!!

I think the best thing was living in Hong Kong when I was about 12-14 years old

at paying for swimming, I think that now!

Sorry for completely hijacking the thread scaryteacher!

yes sorry :slaps wrist! Just wanted to give the view from a child/now adult

I am horrified at some of the attitudes of posters on MN to the military.

It seems to be okay to moan about having a dh who works silly long hours in the city but not about a dh whose job is unpredictable.

I guess I think in theory you know what you sign up for but coping with the reality especially during times of conflict is so so so hard. As for for how much you get paid - surely that depends on individual jobs etc

I know my dh wouldn't put his life on the line no matter how much the pay.......

I want to say thank you to all of your other halves who do put their lives on the line and have to compromise what they want for a family life to make the best of difficult choices.

I have just been speaking to my lovely DH (via satellite phone - grr, delay!) - I have not seen him for seven months. Not one word of complaint from him - just praise for just how hard the whole ship's company works; how much everybody is missing home and how they have to really stay focused on the job as this deployment nears its end.

Yes, of course he chose to join up and make the RN his life and career; I chose to marry him knowing full well what this would entail. Quite a few times over the years I have come across this attitude that, having chosen this path in life, we should never then express any sadness at being apart, or discomfort over his working hours/conditions - because 'it was our choice'.

Don't get me wrong - we are not moaners; the exact opposite if anything; I'm as stoical as they come - but it's always puzzled me that some people seem to think we should put up a front that is totally devoid of emotion!

Devonport is still the largest Naval dockyard in Europe MrsChips. People in Plymouth are interested in the Navy, many are either directly employed by it, or their jobs are dependant upon it.

Why on earth do you think there is such an outcry every time the yard is threatened? Have you even thought about the effects on Plymouth, West Devon and SE Cornwall if the yard closes and all the work goes to Portsmouth and Rosyth? If you consider that the attack submarines will soon be based in Scotland - that's a lot of income lost to the area - the salaries won't be spent there any more - the people who work in RNAD Ernesettle will lose their jobs, as will those who man the ammunition barges. The civvies who work in ComDevFlot will also be redeployed or lose their jobs, as will those who man the tugs and the dockyard maties who work on the boats when they are alongside. Add to that the skimmers moving to Portsmouth and the loss is economically ruinous for the area.

All the rich yachties who buy the nice flats and patronise Tanners etc can always live without meals out and their boats or their second homes, but the ordinary people in Plymouth can't afford to lose their jobs. Manadon was a huge loss to the economy when it closed down, and it will be the same if the Dockyard closes. I note that the Tories were the only ones who pledged to keep it open - that may have been why they did so well in that area this time.

As I said I know nobody that this makes any difference too.

22000 used to work there now it is 4000, and plymouth still ticks over.

My family live there and nobody has any involement with the dockyard.

Soory to dissappoint that plymouth does not revolve around the dockyard because it don't.

Goodbyemrschips, you really should check your grammar and spelling when replying, especially as earlier on in this thread, you had the cheek to call people who join up 'boneheads'.

I had a quick look on the AIBU thread and was somewhat annoyed.

Everyone has choices in this life, I chose to join the Navy, marry a sailor, have a child and put him in boarding school aged 11. All those choices were right for me and my family, I do not slag anyone off for staying at home with their children and being married to a guy who works regular hours, just as I don't expect them to slag me off for my decision's in life.

The point being is that Plymouth shouldn't just be 'ticking over' MrsChips, it should be doing much better than it does.

If you look at the effect of opening up Portsmouth dockyard again and moving the work up there, it has a vibrant economy, fairly buoyant house prices and the surrounding areas in Hampshire benefit.

Plymouth has an airport that has just stopped flights to London, and from what you have said, a section of the population that can't see if the RN move out of Plymouth altogether then Plymouth is screwed, as there is nothing going in to replace it.

It's the peripheral businesses that are hit as well - the nightclubs and bars on Union Street for example. Students don't have the money that workers do, especially with higher fees coming in.

My family live there, I lived there and in a 20 mile radius until I moved abroad; I still have my house there, and go back frequently. My family are and have been involved in the Dockyard and the RN there and in the people I know in Plymouth, there is concern about the economic effects of the withdrawal of ships and submarines from Devonport. We evidently move in different circles.