Right then chaps, and fellow Tripadvisor thicko friends. I am off.

[Portofino]

I sit here looking at a load of made up shite, FWR gone to the dogs, few really funny threads any more. I am getting old, curmudgeonly and no longer able to sit on my hands. I am nice really, try to help people in Travel and Living Overseas, but the rest of it just brings out the worst in me. I am too cynical and impatient with scroungers, trolls, and those who big themselves up to get a reaction. I hardly dare post in relationships anymore.

I have had a lot of fun over the last few years, I have made some lovely, lovely friends here. much love to the atrocious cunts, the Woolley hugs lot, mrs d, cha0s, my volcanic ash refugee, all those in Living Overseas, the Benelux Mnetters, the feminists who have taught me so much.

I have too much work and a lovely family and they need more of my attention xxx

Yeah, upstairs.

I can't believe you missed the odd baked bean treats.

I don't drink Porto,i would have found those baked bean canapes for you.

They sound discustin' lovely.

I thought they were chickpeas at first, some of us were looking at them wondering what the hell they were made of.

Baked bean canapes = cheapskates.

And were they Heinz?

I bet not.

I mostly moved between the bar and everyone smoking outside.

I remember you GetOrf, all gorgeous and everything, and mrs d and cupof tea. Hully and Pagwatch were propping up the bar. And yes, I died of embarrassment being introduced to HelenMN.

That's what I did in the end, bar to fags outside, then cake, then bar again. It was a really good night, I like that part of London.

I am FB friends with the lovely BIWI and the Woolley hugs lot who I met just before the Chardonnay curtain descended.

I started drinking early as well, walking round the city with suitcases with dollytwat and we couldn't find the hotel, so we very sensible thought sod it and went and sat in the nearest bar and had a few glasses to start us off.

Isn't there a meet up going on tonight?

I've never been,too scaredy cat.

It's tomorrow afternoon.

Meet ups are great fun, reeling. I have been to a couple of London ones and one I. Cheltenham. I was nervous as hell though.

I can't really stretch to a London meet up tbh.

But there are loads i'd love to meet.

Come and stay with me Reeling and we'll have our own meet up.

I am going to London on 29th June. Come Reeling.

I am hoping to smoke out Reality and Shirley.

Pm me your address FTS i need to send you dosh for your bonkers charity run anyway.
Then i will talk myself into visiting the big smoke,it is many a year since i ventured up to Town.

Ha! Porto,just saw you here!

It is my thread

Ooops,sorry,i forgot! right back.

I've out-smoked reality - does that count?

God Babyheave, that must have taken some doing

I didn't think reality was a smoker.

GetOrf, FTS, I think all those odd people wandering by in all the neon and deeley-boppers were the night walking marathon for cancer or some such, it was certainly surreal.

I am a bit pissed now, dinner out with the PILs which never ends well because they are booze hounds like me, not because I drink to dull any pain of being with them so I hope I sober up before tomorrow aft.

Porto now that you are no longer Flounced, will you please come to another meet up? Puh-leeeeeeze?

And apparently there is no cake tomorrow neither

HTD I'm making some cake pops for the girls, shall I bring you some too?

Reeling, come up next month when Porto's at mine. fuck. Can you imagine the carnage no rush with the sponsorship for my death run, as it's not until October.