Anyone think we (women) get away with too much?

[ThatPinkHelper]

A few of us were having a chat over the weekend about our teenage years and the usual subjects came up, drinking on parks, staying out late, going places other than where we told our parents, older boys etc…

It was when the subject moved to older boys and the usual commentary around that, that one of us mentioned that she used to get taken out clubbing by 18 year old girls when she was 14.

The group was fairly split on whether it was that big of a deal. I was firmly in the camp of - “looking back on it that was very sketchy and I’d absolutely flip my lid if it was my daughter”.

But given the hugely contrasting reactions to boys sexually exploiting younger girls and older girls putting younger girls in very dangerous situations and environments, I began wondering if we sometimes get away with too much? Not as individuals but collectively as women.

I know it’s only theoretical but as I mentioned above, if my daughter was 14 and was being lead astray like that I’d go ballistic but I’m beginning to wonder if everyone around me would try to play it off as normal.

"Older girls", even 18 year olds, are slightly more mature than 14 year old girls, but developmentally they are still children and their brains are still all over the place until their mid-20s. They cannot assess danger like adults.

It is the young girls' parents' job to keep their children safe. Your parents failed you, not older girls. The danger you are taking about refers to girls getting assaulted or raped, which is almost exclusively being done by boys and men. So you are blaming older girls for crimes that boys and men commit. Crimes older girls often fall victim to too.

One of the strangest posts I've read on here! Someone had a boozy lunch I suspect. I'm still none the wiser what the question was.

It would've been the 14 year old me enticing the 18year old in a club 🤣

You're not making any sense op.
What are you actually asking?

Yes and they are often morally culpable. I want them held responsible too. Its just that the actual driving force is usually the mothers. Men will abuse their children in horrific ways too. But the transing of very small children is unusual for being something that is genuinely more of a female thing. Fortunately its rare. Unfortunately some women are definitely getting away with it.

I only brought it up because I was trying to think of cases where the OPs preposition was true. And that's the only one I could think of.

I was also thinking cats get away with far too much. But that's off topic and anyway its understandable because they're floofy.

I stole some pick 'n' mix once and got away with it. I know. Shocking.

(In all seriousness OP, I don't think everyone is being obtuse here, your post really doesn't make a lot of sense. If you could explain in three sentences or fewer exactly what it is you think women are getting away with, I think people would be better able to discuss sensibly)

I suspect it was a deliberately confusing post, maybe to get people to talk about all the things women are getting away with?

I do not understand the argument you are trying to make. Women barely get away with being murdered and raped- even those are usually ‘their fault’ somehow.

It's a strange first post on MN by the OP, that's for sure.

It just sounds like thinly veiled misogyny to me.

@taylorswift1989 Well you are getting away with flying about in a private jet. Or, alternatively, impersonation via username.

I'm a billionaire so I get away with all sorts!

Absolutely not!

What the jeff is this thread about?

I stole all the peppermint creams once and my brother got blamed for it.

I don't even have a brother so your brother got blamed when I spilt ketchup on the sofa.

This thread is about the fact the OP now has a son and is bristling with the need to turn some accusatory ire on girls.

OP, older girls socialising with much younger girls didn’t happen much at all when I was growing up. But even if they had been, it would it no way be equal to older boys being sexually predatory to young girls.

Are you pressing the middle button repeatedly and then posting?

Actually I suspect she's been brainwashed by her partner. Telling her that all women are mean and get away with murder just by fluttering their eyelashes and giggling. Probably been following that Tate guy.
I also have been speaking to my partner recently who’s mentioned a huge number of negative experiences with girls/women growing up

I mean...what woman would independently believe this crap? It's Tate territory.
There’s an entire statute book to police men. Society largely polices men.

I’m shocked and appalled

Whenever I've seen the rare case of a woman abusing a teenage boy every female commenter wants to skin her alive and is repulsed by her, while many men minimise and make phooarrr lucky him jokes.

But I've no real idea if that's what this thread is about.

We’re typically raised to police our sexuality in a way that men aren’t. That goes deeper in to how patriarchy hurts men.

Can I check - this isn't in relation to your post about men being victims of CSE (presumably perpetrated by girls/women) is it? Because if so... children (boys and girls) who are victims of CSE are NOT victimised because they "failed to police their own sexuality". I really really hope that isn't what you meant. Yes, we teach children about the underwear rule, don't talk to strangers etc. But it isn't up to children to police or "gatekeep" their own sexuality in the way you describe. Or if you meant that later on men are less likely to consider themselves victims because again they don't see their sexuality as something to police. That's a really damaged view of how and why sexual assault/exploitation is damaging. If I take your post about your husband at face value, please persuade him to talk to someone trained in counselling CSE victims. Because it seems you both have quite complicated and not particularly healthy views to unpick.

Seems unlikely. Cats get away with everything because they’re just too heckin cute…

@WontSomebodyThinkOfTheOtters unless just what the Toxoplasmosa Gondi wants us to think...

The Incels and Incellas have landed. Always an improbable, contrived situation that 'just got them thinking'. Cue dog-whistle post blaming girls/women for the ills of boys/men in the hope of solidarity + a good old bunfight, to keep incel crap to the forefront. As transparent as glass, especially over the last few weeks