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Feminism: chat

A list of seemingly unbelievable not-rapes (according to the CPS and juries)

173 replies

AdamRyan · 05/10/2022 08:05

Inspired by this news where someone who reported a rape and was told they might have sexsomnia

www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-63116989

So these are other notable cases I can think of:

The man who tripped and penetrated someone
www.google.com/amp/s/www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/crime/millionaire-ehsan-abdulaziz-who-said-he-accidentally-tripped-and-penetrated-teen-is-cleared-of-rape-a6774946.html%3famp

The man who got the hotel room muddled up
www.google.com/amp/s/www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1360801/amp/Haydor-Khan-cleared-rape-climbing-wrong-bed.html

The man who thought a girl who was moments before having sex with his friend must also want it with him, even though he was so tired he had to go to bed while his friend was getting viagra
www.irishmirror.ie/news/world-news/black-student-cleared-night-time-7951757

The man who thinks asking a friend "can I have a go [on her]?" is enough consent www.google.com/amp/s/thesecretbarrister.com/2016/10/14/10-myths-busted-about-the-ched-evans-case/amp/

I'm so tired of it.

OP posts:
AdamRyan · 05/10/2022 08:06

Feel free to add more

OP posts:
dangerrabbit · 05/10/2022 08:07

The ones that never went to trial
The ones that were never reported

poorbuthappy · 05/10/2022 08:22

The one who text his victim afterwards to say sorry.

Newusernameaug · 05/10/2022 08:27

At crown court my rapist got away with it, because apparently I imagined it due to having PTSD - which they found out about by my medical records being submitted which I was told was perfectly normal and if I withheld them it would make me look back.

they took a note my therapist had written down 4 years BEFORE the rape, where he said I have intrusive thoughts of being attacked, they argued I must have had an intrusive thought and just imagined he slipped his dick in me 🙄

That was enough to cause reasonable doubt, despite text evidence of him admitted it and apologising to me (he had been a friend before this).

AdamRyan · 05/10/2022 09:40

That is disgusting new I am so sorry

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Felix125 · 05/10/2022 09:50

This is what the police are up against

We send the cases to the CPS believing there is sufficient to charge & prosecute the offender - yet CPS come back with bizarre conclusions like these. Or the defence bring up a similarly bizarre argument at court which are simply accepted.

Soubriquet · 05/10/2022 09:56

I just.. can’t.

AdamRyan · 05/10/2022 10:01

Felix125 · 05/10/2022 09:50

This is what the police are up against

We send the cases to the CPS believing there is sufficient to charge & prosecute the offender - yet CPS come back with bizarre conclusions like these. Or the defence bring up a similarly bizarre argument at court which are simply accepted.

Yes exactly
The police are between a rock and a hard place. They either try to investigate potential defenses to rule them out and then are criticised for not believing victims, or they put a lot of effort into supporting victims for the CPS to make decisions like this, or for the jury to make illogical decisions.

I've posted lots about changes that could be made so I'm not going to do that again,but something does need to be done as at the moment men can pretty much rape with impunity.

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NotAnotherTaco · 05/10/2022 10:37

The reporting in the Irish Mirror article is appalling - "the girl left the room hysterically". Us females do tend to get a little emotional and hysterical at times like these , eh? FFS 😢

AdamRyan · 05/10/2022 11:03

Oh, I remembered another one. The 27 year old man who thought it was fine to have sex with a teenager he had never met before in a muddy alleyway. Her choice of underwear proved she was up for it.

www.google.com/amp/s/www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-46207304.amp

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picklemewalnuts · 05/10/2022 18:06

It's sickening.

I had to leave a sauna today after intrusive thoughts about my rape. It was over 30 years ago, and I still occasionally need to make a transition to stop my mind cycling through 'what if's.

How can it be so hard? Why can't we start from a position of 'women haven't consented unless....' rather than women have consented unless there're witnesses, sworn affidavits and injuries.

AdamRyan · 06/10/2022 07:32

How can it be so hard? Why can't we start from a position of 'women haven't consented unless....' rather than women have consented unless there're witnesses, sworn affidavits and injuries.

Exactly. The "reasonable belief" clause is ehar

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AdamRyan · 06/10/2022 07:34

Oops. What annoys me most. Why is the man's belief more important than the woman's experience?

It's not like you can use the "belief" as a defence in other crimes.

Then add on tp that what juries appear to think is reasonable. "I was so drunk I went in the wrong room so reasonably thought the stranger was my consenting wife" 😡

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picklemewalnuts · 06/10/2022 08:02

It's like a pendulum swing, that shifting of responsibility to the woman.

No one seems to be saying to men:
Stay reasonably sober, so you'll be sure your fucking the right woman
Make sure you put your dick away, so it can't accidentally impregnate someone.
Check she actually fancies you, rather than assuming.

There's this unspoken assumption that sex is on unless she locks herself in a room.

NotAnotherTaco · 06/10/2022 09:28

AdamRyan · 06/10/2022 07:34

Oops. What annoys me most. Why is the man's belief more important than the woman's experience?

It's not like you can use the "belief" as a defence in other crimes.

Then add on tp that what juries appear to think is reasonable. "I was so drunk I went in the wrong room so reasonably thought the stranger was my consenting wife" 😡

YES! Exactly this. Imagine.. "I was so drunk I went in the wrong house, smashing the window as I went in. I reasonably thought I could help myself to the tv, iPads...."

longcovidquestions · 06/10/2022 09:34

It stinks - who are these individuals making makes these ridiculous and frankly indefensible decisions?

NotAnotherTaco · 06/10/2022 09:48

"The victim was clearly up for having their car pinched that night. It was a racy sports car, brazenly flaunted on their drive and had been buffed & shined."

Tealpoppy · 06/10/2022 09:48

I lost my case 8 years ago
there was dna proof of sex even though he swore we hadn’t had any contact sexually
another woman came forward to say he’d done the same to her,3 months after me
i had the texts to say he was ‘sorry’
witnesses to say I was in tears and shaking-he was roughly dragging me away from them (but they didn’t think to ask if I was ok-this is the army-they’d seen it all before apparently)
cctv of him dragging me away by my hair from where it happened and pushing me into his car

aaannnddd he got away with it because he forced me into his car (he took me back to where I was staying) and apparently there was a red traffic light-he stopped,so why didn’t I get out and run for it?

I honestly don’t remember a traffic light-red,green or any other colour
i was scared for my life-I honestly thought he was going to kill me-I really couldn’t have told you my own name at that point
i didn’t know the area at all-there where no houses nearby-only the army camp and there was no way I was going there (I was told that if I’d got out and ran in a certain direction,there are houses about a mile down the road-he would have caught up with me long before then but that didn’t matter)

seems I was to blame for being friends with him and going into my friends room-a room I’d been in many times before,just as I have millions of times with any other friend I have

NotAnotherTaco · 06/10/2022 09:57

I'm so sorry that happened to you, and I'm so fucking angry on your behalf. When is it ever going to fucking change?

AdamRyan · 06/10/2022 10:04

Tealpoppy · 06/10/2022 09:48

I lost my case 8 years ago
there was dna proof of sex even though he swore we hadn’t had any contact sexually
another woman came forward to say he’d done the same to her,3 months after me
i had the texts to say he was ‘sorry’
witnesses to say I was in tears and shaking-he was roughly dragging me away from them (but they didn’t think to ask if I was ok-this is the army-they’d seen it all before apparently)
cctv of him dragging me away by my hair from where it happened and pushing me into his car

aaannnddd he got away with it because he forced me into his car (he took me back to where I was staying) and apparently there was a red traffic light-he stopped,so why didn’t I get out and run for it?

I honestly don’t remember a traffic light-red,green or any other colour
i was scared for my life-I honestly thought he was going to kill me-I really couldn’t have told you my own name at that point
i didn’t know the area at all-there where no houses nearby-only the army camp and there was no way I was going there (I was told that if I’d got out and ran in a certain direction,there are houses about a mile down the road-he would have caught up with me long before then but that didn’t matter)

seems I was to blame for being friends with him and going into my friends room-a room I’d been in many times before,just as I have millions of times with any other friend I have

Wtaf
😡

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Soubriquet · 06/10/2022 10:04

I’ve been sexually assaulted by a friends dad, and nearly raped by my ex bf.

I didn’t report it simply because even at that young age, I knew it wouldn’t go anywhere.

That it would be up to me to prove they did it.

It’s awful. Rape seems to be the one crime where the victim is seen as guilty before the perpetrators.

No one says “you should have had bullet proof glass if you didn’t want to get robbed!”

or

“you should have worn a bullet proof vest if you didn’t want to get shot!”

SingingSands · 06/10/2022 10:51

Has anyone seen Prima Facie, with Jodie Comer? It is an absolutely phenomenal piece of theatre and raises so many questions about how rape victims are treated and how their cases are processed.

To me, and I don't know if I can articulate this well so bear with me... but it is almost as if rape cases are outside of criminal law. Rape is a criminal act, but the defence of rapists relies a lot on things outside of fact: beliefs of the perpetrators, woolly questions of "why didn't you do X?" or "why did you wear X?". And these beliefs come from a male perspective. The rapist uses his male power and privilege to rape and the defence is constructed from the male perspective of blaming the victim. And that's why we see cases being let off on these ridiculous clauses.

I'm rambling now, but it makes me angry, and scared. Love to you all who have been through this.

AdamRyan · 06/10/2022 16:59

I haven't seen it.
I thought Unbelievable onNetflix was good
The problem is people don't want to recognise this is a problem. The obsession of the media with "balance" and getting men to talk about "false accusations" doesn't help at all.

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Soubriquet · 06/10/2022 17:09

Unbelievable was fantastic.

It really showed how a girl wasn’t to be believed because she was troubled and she wanted the same bed sheets she had.

That her stories kept changing because the police were putting pressure on her

crispinglovershighkick · 06/10/2022 17:26

Rape laws are a lie in themselves. If there's no essential societal agreement on when and how women are legally allowed to refuse sex (and I would argue that it's very clear there is no such agreement and radical feminism is doing the heavy lifting) then how can such laws be enforced?

Tbh we can't even effectively enforce these laws for the benefit of children. What chance have adult women got?

We can't even agree on what kind of murder of women is the bad kind you go to prison for.

This is what male supremacy looks like.

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