My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

Feminism: chat

Woman walking around town in suspenders and thong- empowering?!

81 replies

DoobryWhatsit · 04/04/2022 10:30

Instagram stunt, obviously. The "point" being made is apparently that there is nothing inherently sexual about female bodies, or the pieces of clothing that cover them (or not), and that if people view a woman in a teeny tiny bra, suspenders, thong and stilettos as sexual, then this just shows what an awful misogynistic society we live in.

The woman in question was particularly scathing of anyone crying "what about the CHILDREN!!", because yes, children exist, but so does her arse.

I mean, I kind of get the argument. Of course women shouldn't be seen as primarily existing for the titillation/gratification of men. But, we live in a society with accepted rules around decency. Sex is normal, but I feel very strongly that we shouldn't be exposing our children to sexualised images, and I'm afraid I do see sexy underwear as sexual! Am I a closet misogynist?

I don't know how many people will agree with me/understand what I'm getting at, but you lot are always really good at putting my "I really don't agree with this, but I can't quite form a coherent argument" feelings into actual words!

OP posts:
DoobryWhatsit · 04/04/2022 10:32

I don't know if this link will work www.instagram.com/p/Cb6z5A_IZOA/?hl=en

OP posts:
SuperLoudPoppingAction · 04/04/2022 10:35

Women's bodies aren't inherently sexual but surely certain types of lingerie have certain connotations - seduction etc?

Me striding about in my high waisted dinosaur pants and a crop top wouldn't be remotely sexual. Thong pants and lacy suspenders do seem quite... idk for me they would be self-objectifying but that term doesn't go down well with the wider public.

Skelligsfeathers · 04/04/2022 10:40

Absolute nonsense. I don't want to see ANYONE 's arse when i go shopping.

Whatwouldscullydo · 04/04/2022 10:44

I'm also not very good at wording things but my thoughts are, a bra is functional. And bras can be pretty and functional. I dont think there's necessarily anything sexual about a woman in a bra.

The thing amd suspenders, well that seems to be playing into the pornified idea of how women should look like in underwear. Placing comfort and functionality at the bottom.of the list. I do not see whats empowering about walking down the street dresses in clothes that can't be comfortable designed to be style over substance.

Perhaps if she walked down the street in massive pants and a bra it woulod seem.more like sticking up two fingers at society. This just seems like complying with societal pressures as to what women should wear/look like and pretending you are totally cool with it.

But then if she wants to wear it so be it I don't wish to remove her choice to do so.

However there are societal norms abut what clothes are worn wear and I don't think underwear belongs on the street like that amd I'd say the same about a man.walking in boxers.

MedusasBadHairDay · 04/04/2022 10:45

The biggest problem I have with stunts like this is that it largely benefits the misogynists and perverts.

It's like the free the nipple campaign.

Yes, in an ideal world women would not be objectified, their bodies would be seen as neutrally as men's bodies, and we would be rid of the idea that the purpose of women's bodies being at all visible is purely sexual. But we are way way way off that world. And I don't see how we can reach that point by giving men exactly what they want. The master's tools will never dismantle the master's house.

HotPenguin · 04/04/2022 10:49

Err I think the message would be more effective if she was actually naked, like the naked bike ride they've had in the past in London. Wearing suspenders etc clearly IS sexual imagery and makes the point they are making quite confusing. I imagine it's also extremely cold?

SushiShopSearch · 04/04/2022 10:54

I don't understand why a woman would do this. I just find it demeaning.

SpinMeRightRoundBabyRightRound · 04/04/2022 10:56

If it was empowering, you’d be tripping over men doing it…

Deliriumoftheendless · 04/04/2022 10:57

Maybe an 80 year old woman should do it. Pensioners need empowering just as much as young women.

Silverclocks · 04/04/2022 10:58

I understand the argument, but I don't want to see a man walking round town in a thong either.

Cuck00soup · 04/04/2022 10:59

A bra is a useful garment.
Suspenders are a pain in the bum. Nothing empowering about an uncomfortable and annoying garment.

If it were dresses with pockets, or comfy tights that actually stay up I might agree.

DoobryWhatsit · 04/04/2022 11:04

Thank you everyone for your thoughts, you have indeed helped me cement my own thoughts. Especially the notion that if a garment isn't comfortable or functional then it's probably got some other purpose. And of course the argument that men don't do any of this bullshit to feel "empowered"!

OP posts:
GreenWhiteViolet · 04/04/2022 11:04

@Skelligsfeathers

Absolute nonsense. I don't want to see ANYONE 's arse when i go shopping.

This. Male or female, any age, any body type. Keep your arse covered.

I also think underwear with stiletto heels is overtly sexualised in a way that barefoot in underwear or clothed with heels on isn't. It's not something a person would ever wear in everyday life.
ThatLibraryMiss · 04/04/2022 11:18

I hope she's got a nice warm coat waiting close by. She'll catch a chill on her kidneys.

deydododatdodontdeydo · 04/04/2022 11:35

She's wearing clothing which has been designed to be "sexy" - to reveal or accentuate her body.
OK, a bra may be functional, but not the stockings and suspenders.
If she'd done it in baggy pants, plain bra and flat shoes she might have a point.

Kudupoo · 04/04/2022 11:37

First question, are men doing it?
Second question, are men enjoying it?

Thoughts - our bodies are multifunctional. We can use them for many things, one being sexual pleasure. One problem is the idea that women's bodies have basically no other purpose than that and therefore can be objectified by men. No. We live in our bodies, they are our greatest tool, they belong to us to keep/share as we choose and consent to. A woman just walking around comfortable in her own skin using her body how she likes and thinking her own thoughts is probably way more empowering than trotting around in an outfit associated with sex and receiving/giving sexual pleasure. Using our bodies to run, to travel, to gestate, to see new horizons, to comfort our children, to solve problems, to innovate. We have such amazing function, we are so much more than a form. Seeing ourselves as active and autonomous not passive and decorative. This 'protest' is still all about her body as a form and what men should thing about it. Fuck that.

Our bodies aren't just sexual but they aren't entirely asexual either. The point is more that it's up to us how we use them. Trotting around as a male gaze ideal in public won't change the minds of men who see women as nothing more than that already...in my opinion.

LadyGardenersQuestionTime · 04/04/2022 11:41

Oh FGS. She needs to grow up and get over herself.

AlternativelyWired · 04/04/2022 11:43

It's too cold for that. It's big coat weather up here.

starcluster · 04/04/2022 11:45

Yeah, I don't think having a woman who is society's ideal walking on the street in lingerie is empowering to anyone. It just comes across as attention seeking to do it in the middle of a city (maybe I'm wrong, I watched with the volume off).

Self interest under the guise of empowerment. 'You can't criticise me, see I'm doing it for other young women!!' Are you fuck, mate

Itsbackagain · 04/04/2022 11:50

@Skelligsfeathers

Absolute nonsense. I don't want to see ANYONE 's arse when i go shopping.

This!
refreshingseahorse · 04/04/2022 11:51

I don't know where I heard this (maybe a podcast) but if you are wondering if something is actually empowering try this:
Imagine an older financially successful man on a golf course advising his nephew about how to make his way in the world. If you can imagine the older guy advising whatever course of action you are considering then it is probably useful life advice. If not, it isn't. e.g.
Q should I maintain contact with former colleagues?
A yes
Q should I roam about the town centre in my underwear?
A No, why would you do that?

ssd · 04/04/2022 11:53

I wonder if she'd do it if she was 3 stones heavier? Shes just showing off.

Newsletters you might like

Discover Exclusive Savings!

Sign up to our Money Saver newsletter now and receive exclusive deals and hot tips on where to find the biggest online bargains, tailored just for Mumsnetters.

Log in to update your newsletter preferences.

You've subscribed!

Parent-Approved Gems Await!

Subscribe to our weekly Swears By newsletter and receive handpicked recommendations for parents, by parents, every Sunday.

Log in to update your newsletter preferences.

You've subscribed!

Notbeinfunnehbut · 04/04/2022 11:56

It’s just so narcissistic, it’s a word salad shes created so she can walk down the street being ogled for an afternoon basically….Hmm

And probably gaining financially from it Hmm

NightmareSlashDelightful · 04/04/2022 12:02

Well she's already empowered, isn't she. In a certain way. She's able-bodied, she's white, she's what many people would class as beautiful, she's young, she lives somewhere that she can go out and not be arrested/fined or stoned to death.

She already has a great deal of power, in certain ways. So why does she need more of it? And who is claiming that power, other than her herself? What use is it?

'Empowered' is one of those words like evocative that sounds OK from a distance and gets thrown around a lot but actually needs specificity and context to actually mean anything. Power comes in all kinds of forms, not all of it good.

LeftFootForward · 04/04/2022 12:20

@refreshingseahorse

I don't know where I heard this (maybe a podcast) but if you are wondering if something is actually empowering try this:
Imagine an older financially successful man on a golf course advising his nephew about how to make his way in the world. If you can imagine the older guy advising whatever course of action you are considering then it is probably useful life advice. If not, it isn't. e.g.
Q should I maintain contact with former colleagues?
A yes
Q should I roam about the town centre in my underwear?
A No, why would you do that?

This is a fine piece of advice, thank you. I'll keep it for next time I hear the (usually attention seeking) empowering argument.
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.