Ollie & Gareth Locke & Surrogacy

100% agree

My cousin effectively bought a baby from a surrogate in Russia and I’ve never been able to look at him in the same way. That poor baby and her mother.

To make it easier for male people to commission humans?

The laws need to urgently shift to centering and prioritising the child in the situation, then the woman whose body is being rented, and it should involve the same thorough screening of commissioning parents by social services as required in the case of adoption. Although I don't see there is any ethical way for this to happen at all. It's hard to see how a couple who appear to have so little regard to all this are good examples of why the law should be made easier.

I think they are just a bit naïve. I thought that when I saw them on the show discussing how ivf works and I was surprised that they clearly didn’t understand the process very well. They got things wrong and misunderstood so it was obvious they hadn’t really researched thoroughly. They seem like a lovely couple though and I’m sure they will be wonderful and loving parents.

Not much sympathy expressed for the woman whose body has had to deal with the miscarriage, and who is probably still in a state with hormonal upheaval and emotional stress. I doubt many women going through a miscarriage would post a tastefully arranged picture of an embroidered dressing gown on their social media pages to let everyone know how really really distressed they were......

When marriage equality was being debated in Ireland there was some much insistence that these conversations weren’t part of the discussion. It has definitely started here. We have had adoption scandal after adoption scandal and this is just part of the next generations version of the same but in the main people just don’t look up they look back and blame the last generation instead, much easier.

Sad story. I find the idea of surrogacy wrong and hope they don't manage to change laws here, but also hope they are able to give all that love to a child soon.

I've changed my views on many things since I was 19, including moving to the right in a way which would horrify my 19 year old self. I have not however changed my view that artificially assisted conception is wrong.

It was very odd for 19 year old me to be aligned with the Catholic Church that "test tube babies" were wrong- that was the start of this slippery slope.

I get that they really want a family, and it’s sad that things aren’t going to plan for them. But honestly, why does it feel like the women are secondary to that?!

It’s ingrained misogyny. Women are kind and caring, and being able to help someone achieve their dream is wonderful!

Tom Daley/DLB are the same. No mention of the childs mother, or the risks to the surrogate and/or egg donor. Just instagrammable happy families.

I am sure they are good parents. But what happens when the child grows and wants to know their medical history, or actually what their mother is like?

While I am sure gay men are equally capable of fantastic parenting, they do seem to be trying to erase women from the picture.

There is no question about gay men making fantastic parents it is surrogacy that brings the significant complications that people are trying to gloss over and minimise and dismiss.

Out of interest, are there any pieces written about how surrogates feel about their experiences? And how they feel 5-10 years later?

"test tube babies" were wrong- that was the start of this slippery slope.

How are they wrong ?? I’m just
looking now at my two “ test tube babies “ and wondering how anyone could see anything other than two glorious miracles??

I have just finished reading about this and came here to see if there was a thread because of that same part of his interview.

Any regulations around surrogacy need to be firmly focused on the health, welfare, and wellbeing of the pregnant woman / surrogate mother, and then the child she is carrying, above and beyond any other consideration to any other person involved.

And I don't think having laws and rules in place to reflect this is against gay equality or any other equality.

But as in any other pregnancy, the woman who is pregnant has to come first, even before the baby she is carrying. The rights of anyone, male or female, who are using surrogacy as a path to parenthood should come way down the scale of considerations in this issue.

I am not really in favour of surrogacy. I'm very sorry for their loss but first and foremost in my thoughts is the woman who has miscarried.

Pregnancy is not an easy condition, or a safe one. I hope she is well and being supported through this time.

With regard to the children; one of my friends was adopted as a child and has said how strange & yet lovely it is that only now she has her own children does she have anyone in her life with whom she shares genes. Her daughter has the same hair as her. She has a close and loving relationship with her parents but it just isn’t the same. How will children born to surrogates feel in their 30s?

I’ve no idea who they are and had to accept a much smaller family than I’d planned due to nearly dying in pregnancy. But buying and selling people is wrong whatever age they are and for whatever reason.

@KimikosNightmare we had fertility problems which the doctor recommended we solve with ivf. Do you think that any measure to solve infertility is wrong? Should we have just accepted that we couldn't have children? Why on earth would we not have pursued ivf?

I think the Lockes have been very influenced by the transgender couple who have been advising them. Ollie and Gareth are caught up in the idea without thinking about it too much and also caught up in the gay rights aspect. I am finding it very hard to engage with.

Must say I really hate referring to children conceived via IVF as "test tube babies." At what point of assisted conception is a baby "commodified"? Any time at all that medicine or science or a doctor is involved? Because that's a lot of babies, many of whom are not born to surrogates.

@LizziesTwin - I would guess most babies born via surrogacy are related genetically to one of the parents who raise them. As a celebrity example, in Kim Kardashian's situation, I think it was Kim's eggs and Kanye's sperm, and an unrelated surrogate who was pregnant. In many cases that I've read, I think the woman who provided the egg and the woman who carries the pregnancy are different, but the sperm is provided by the man who intends to raise the baby (be he in a straight or gay couple).

@KimikosNightmare

I'm sure they are wonderful for you personally but it isn't a glorious miracle. It's the commodification of babies. It's the ultimate "I want, so I must get".

Surely the same principle goes for everything medical? Like you want to live if you have cancer so you do chemo? Infertility is a medical problem after all. Not at all the same as surrogacy where you have to take the birth mother and babies feelings into account.

I'm not against surrogacy if it is truely altruistic, like someones sister. I might be biased because of one of my cousins being born this way. Both her and her parents are quite happy and doing well. And yes, my cousin has children of her own, no issues there.

It's the commodification of babies. It's the ultimate "I want, so I must get". what nonsense. Ivf is a perfectly straightforward solution for people who can’t conceive in other ways. You might as well say access to folic acid, good midwifery, or assisted birth was buying a baby. Do you even understand what ivf is???