Feeling down today and would like to chat

[Lonelymum]

Having a low day today. I feel so bored with my life and lack the will power to do anything about it. I just do the same boring tasks day in day out, no breaks at the weekend, no appreciation of what I do, and no joy to look forward to. It is so boring! Yet, I don't make things better for myself because I don't want to go out and do anything different either. I just don't seem to like anyone any more.

Also, when I do try to do something about my problems, I get nowhere. For instance, I have a really bad phobia and, with MN support, I went to my GP about it last November. She referred me to a psychologist, but I only received a letter from the hospital today and even that wasn't an appt, just a Do you still want to be seen? letter. Well, yes I do still want to be seen, but you are a bit late as I have since moved to the other end of the country! I don't want to go to my new GP with the same problem as I felt so humiliated the first time, but if I don't go, nothing will change, right?

I just feel like I want to stop my life and start again with someone else's, preferably in a different age, as I don't feel I fit the modern age.

Teaching fits the bill - ties in with children, is interesting (never a dull moment!) and pays reasonably well - but the stress levels might not be acceptable.

I think I am going to do some research on the internet along the lines of NT volunteer or museum work. Well, researching something doesn't commit me, does it?

BTW, the doctor rang back and sounded very nice. He said he would check my notes (Oh how I cringed!) and make a referral for me, and, bearing in mind I have already waited 6 months, he doesn't think I will have to wait much longer to be seen.

Glad the doctor rang and was nice - makes such a difference when you're feeling down. Hopefully he is right about not having to wait too long for the appointment to come through.

Teaching does sound ideal especially if you could get some part-time work. How long is it since you last taught? I have thought about doing a PGCE (science degree) but the childcare issue is so problematic. It would have been so much easier to have lived closer to family!

Yoyo, if you are serious about wanting to do a PGCE course, I would have thought the college would provide a creche. Or, a friend of mine recently did a returning to teaching course and she was quite well paid just to do the course, certainly enough to cover childcare costs. I would have thought they would be so desperate for someone like yourself, with a science degree, to enter teaching that they would bend over backwards to accommodate you. But I may be out of date. I last taught three years ago and that was only for a few months. Prior to that, I last taught full-time nine years ago and certainly the need for science teachers then was enormous.

LM

Sorry your feeling down atm.
I haven't spoke to you for a while, although I have taken on your idea for dh's Grandma. Thanks

Oh good, I am glad you liked the idea. Reading about your (dh's?) grandma reminded me of mine who died 7 years ago, and I know that is what she would have liked more than anything else (human contact, mainly). I really wish I could spend another day with her, so enjoy your granny while you still have her....

Durrrrrrr. You said she was dh's grandma! Read the previous post Lonelymum!

Dh's grandad died last Sept and they were a very close couple. Did everything together. She's desperate for company and to go out.
I asked her the other day if there was anything she wanted and all she said was
"no nothing, just to see you all" so I guess that would be perfect for her.

Just had a frantic evening and you were most definitely on my mind LM. DS (prepare yourself for this) was sick all over himself and me as I made a dash towards the kitchen sink to minimise mess. In so doing I whacked my head on a kitchen cupboard. Thought he had made a swift recovery and then he appeared nappiless in the kitchen and had a vile bout of diarrhoea! I feel so unrelaxed and I've listened to DD2 play the violin and DD1 read aloud. Next up is the ironing!

BTW I would like to teach but even with creche I'd have to sort out the older ones getting to and from school. Have thought of doing classroom- based PGCE but need to look at this more closely.

Well my grandmother outlived her dh by nearly 18 years and lived alone for all that time, and I know that a day out with her family would count for far more than a gift anyday. I hope you take her somewhere and she enjoys heself!

My worst nightmare Yoyo. No more to say on that subject!

Hi Lonelymum

I am fairly new to MN so haen't read posts by you before, but OMG you could be me, in so many ways...!

But I also have that phobia!! And it rules my life too!!! I am a little different, in that when it's other people, I don't mind (dd was sick on me once and I didn't freak out, which was a big weight off my mind as I was always worried how I would react). No, for me it's ME getting sick that is so bad. Have not done so for almost 20 years and don't intend to either! But means I can NEVER eat ANYTHING without fear A horrible way to live. In my rational mind I know that the act itself would be a trillion times less bad than this constant terror, but this is nothing to do with our rational minds, is it?

Won't go on about this here, but wanted to say I so understand. Also, WELL DONE for working to get help. It is so important, because my mum has a mild version of your phobia, (IMO) and that is what has led me to being this way and believe me you do NOT want your dc to feel the way I do, ever.

btw, it's called emetophobia I find it helps me to give it a name, makes it seem less irrational.