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Original poster

Anyone know how CvQ is today? Has she been in touch with anyone?

982 replies

thumbwitch · 29/08/2008 00:35

She was in a bad way in the early hours of this morning, has anyone had any contact with her at all today? Am quite worried about her.

OP posts:
needsupport · 31/08/2008 16:41

oh god more tears

bellavita · 31/08/2008 16:43
needsupport · 31/08/2008 16:49

i was in the kitchen trying my best to do some tea for j.he was shouting for me and i burst into tears.mums taken over.ive had to come away

bellavita · 31/08/2008 16:53

Does he have a highchair? That way, you can sit him in it in the kitchen and he can see you whilst you are doing his tea.

I used to bring the highchair upstairs and put the boys in it when I needed a bath or a shower so they could see me.

bellavita · 31/08/2008 16:54

That sounded like I put them in it together - DS1 had outgrown this stage by the time DS2 got to it.

differentID · 31/08/2008 16:56

he loves you and you love him.

needsupport · 31/08/2008 16:57

thats just it.it wouldnt normally bother me.guess im just feeling bad at being crap for him recently.ppl say no i havent doesnt really cut it either because i know how ive been.if i felt i could id sweep him up and hold him so tightly.but i just cant.i cant

bellavita · 31/08/2008 17:07
Sad
differentID · 31/08/2008 17:08

Ok, you feel like you've been awful by not wanting to hold him and it's perfectly valid for you to feel that way, that's not what I see. I see a brave woman who has had wounds continually re-opened by things happening and it's becoming more and more difficult to cope, especially as sleep hasn't been in abundant supply. The fact that you are trying your hardest to do what you feel is best screams at me that you love him. It's been such a tough time these past couple of months hasn't it?

differentID · 31/08/2008 17:15

Are the routines going alright?

needsupport · 31/08/2008 17:19

the last 18months have been shitbut yeah things have come to a head again.
its like ive put up an emotional wall between us and i dont know how to get it down.
how can someone love and feel such a way about their own child all in one emotion.i dont even understand it really.
one minute i want to be with him and then in the next id do anything to go far away from him.how does this ever make me a good mum.this isnt normal.his childhood will be tainted by me

differentID · 31/08/2008 17:23

Ok, what do you think constitutes a good mum?

needsupport · 31/08/2008 17:24

someone thats not me

differentID · 31/08/2008 17:25

don't think about knocking the wall down in one fell swoop- that's too big a job, we just need to make it smaller for the time being.

differentID · 31/08/2008 17:26
needsupport · 31/08/2008 17:30

waste of frigging space me at the moment

differentID · 31/08/2008 17:32

please don't say that. If other people thought that, no one would respond would they? I certainly don't!

differentID · 31/08/2008 17:33

think it I mean

differentID · 31/08/2008 17:34

Now, how ar eyou coping with mnp's routines?

needsupport · 31/08/2008 17:37

ok but some things need adjusting.tbh mums been doing most of the work.im just the feeder

differentID · 31/08/2008 17:41

Your mum's just building the support frame for you to continue. Have you e-mailed MNP with your questions?

needsupport · 31/08/2008 17:44

no not yet.ill try and do it tonight when im more settled though.
dont know what ill do when mum finally goes homedont want her to leave tbh

differentID · 31/08/2008 17:47

no problem. Do you kno wwhen that is?

needsupport · 31/08/2008 17:49

my cast is due off the week after next so anytime after that.she been here since the beginning of august

bellavita · 31/08/2008 17:52

why don't you ask her to stay a little bit longer?