Has anyone ever suffered from workplace OCD

[tenpairsofshoes]

I have had mild ocd for years. But since having my daughter my workplace OCD has spiralled. I work freelance and work for various companies in content, where products are printed. I don’t get paid much but do proofreading checks. I am so anxious and scared of missing a mistake I spend hours and hours checking then even when something has gone to print I then can recheck. Obviously this means any down time I get is eaten up by checking and sometimes I will find a mistake I have missed and spiral. This is what happened last night. I feel sick and exhausted. I’m a single parent with a small bit of savings but think i need to step away from this work as it’s making me so ill. I take on all the responsibility of everything being correct and I know that’s not right but I can’t help it. I got so stressed last night i genuinely thought what is the point of it all. My OCD takes hold and I feel sick and nervous and can’t focus on anything else. I worry missing mistakes will cost the company thousands and I’ll never work again. For anyone that has never been through this I must sound ridiculous but I feel so low. I have been given setraline by my doctor and have paid for therapy which I’m starting next week. I haven’t started the meds as I’m really scared to be honest. I feel crippled

Take the meds.
I gave up a position for the other worker had ocd it was unbearable.. then had a meltdown at me incase I had mentioned the weird behaviour...I sure had! They will never know.

@Maisymouse2i don’t understand your message, sorry!

OP you've been prescribed the sertraline for a reason - it's very effective for OCD sufferers. The sooner you start it the sooner you'll begin to feel more secure about your work. Yes there might be some side effects at first but they pass pretty quickly and it's an important trade off with the improvement you'll experience within a month or two.

@baroqueandblue my GP was quite dismissive about side effects but I read it can make you feel worse before you feel better which then causes anxiety (vicious circle)

I wouldn't dismiss your concerns @tenpairsofshoes , it seems most people taking sertraline get some form of side effect initially. But it's important to balance that with the benefits to your mental health once you're through any side effects and the sertraline has given you a much more manageable baseline. What sort of support do you have around you, if any?

I get it OP. have also had the kind of ocd you describe and it led to me spending a ridiculous amount of my own time checking and rechecking things. I used to organise travel as part of my job (you can just imagine and it got worse with booking things online as I frequently got timed out from wasting time checking). Like you, I also used to have to proof read and sign things off for printing. Once signed off though I couldn’t look at the thing again. Work bookings for things involving numbers (eg conference venues) or budgets used to take me soooo long.

I didn’t know at the time that my fear of causing harm to my colleagues via mistakes was an ocd type fear. Like many at the time I thought ocd was handwashing excessively. I did eventually seek help for general anxiety and was prescribed sertraline. The best help I have ever had. I wouldn’t say the fears disappeared but I can now do “normal” checking and accept thst yes, I might make errors, but my efforts are sufficient. I only take 50mg but I want to stay on it forever.

OP it’s a few years ago now for me but I didn’t notice any side effects.