2025/26 SAD thread

[Idstillratherbepaddleboarding]

It’s 1st September tomorrow so we’re back for another year’s SAD thread.

Welcome all old and new who struggles in the cold and dark months for advice and general moaning!

The only rule is no talk of snuggling under blankets, crunching in leaves (which will realistically be a soggy wet mulch, or pumpkin spiced anything!

Advice from previous years’ threads:

A SAD lamp can help as can a daylight alarm clock.
Try to get outdoors when the weather/ light allows it.
Try to keep up with your exercise routine or start a new one!
Remember to take your vitamin D and multi vitamins.
Try to have something to look forward to.

@EmeraldRoulette I’d consider 2 things in the diary for next week pretty impressive TBH!

I can’t fuck if cope with this 😭. I’ve just let the puppy out for his bed time wee which should be a simple task but it’s so muddy out there, he’s got mud all over his paws, all over the kitchen floor, all up the patio doors, all over my legs, socks and pjs. I wiped his paws as soon as he came in but it wasn’t enough and he’s now trailed mud all up the stairs, in DS’s bedroom, all over our bedroom and all in the bed 😭😭😭😭. It’s not his fault, it’s the never ending rain and it’s not like I can not let him out for a wee but I also can’t clean the house from top to bottom every time he goes for a wee 😭😭. I just had a major melt down to DH on the phone as he’s working away and now I’m going to bed in my mud bed with muddy PJs. I’m past caring now 😭😭😭.

@Idstillratherbepaddleboarding I hope today was better for you

Today I heard about an acquaintance of an acquaintance (!) who has apparently fallen into the hole. Suffering panic attacks and what not. It happened once before and it was in the winter. Apparently, she has not necessarily linked it up, so I have politely suggested it.

@EmeraldRoulette today was horrific TBH, I took my friend to have her cat put to sleep at the vets. I’m glad I was able to do it for her as she was devastated but it was so hard because of losing my dog so recently.

We have had a nice, sunny walk and I’ve been sending the puppy out the front for his wees so no more mud incidents 🙈.

@Idstillratherbepaddleboarding that's a really kind thing to do, I'm sure she appreciated it.

@EmeraldRoulette she did massively, and I’m glad I could do that for her.

Having a bit of a weird FOMO day

Even though all I've seen today is busyness and traffic!

I did have an invitation for this evening, but I chose not to take it up, (I let them know that ages ago).

basically, I don't wanna go out, but I still have FOMO 😂

@EmeraldRoulette I salute you for even thinking about going out at this time of year. All I can think about is going to hibernate in bed. I've actually started to tell people that I just don't go out in the dark 🙄

@lyingonthebeach I think that's fair enough! What kind of responses do you get? Just curious.

This probably isn't the thread to go into my past - and I'm a great believer in looking forward anyway - but I think some of the FOMO is because I had such a hard time socially after 2020, it sometimes feels a bit strange to turn down an invitation. I am out twice next week though. Nothing major, but I wouldn't want to do anything major!

Speaking of major, what are people's feelings on New Year's Eve? My problem is now I can no longer drive, getting home is a mission on New Year's Eve. Though to be honest, I'm not sure how I feel about coping with drunk people either.

I haven't been out on NYE for about 8 years! I think it's fabulous if you have tickets for something special but most of my friends have kids and do things with their friends with kids which doesn't really appeal to me. I'd rather watch the fireworks on TV and go to bed 😂 Maybe next year I'll pull my finger out and find something to do.

I don't drink anymore - drunk people are amusing, I find it quite funny to say something outrageous to a drunk person 🤣

@PurpleSkies2026 it can be amusing I guess, but you never know how it's going to go

I don't actually have a ticket yet. I'm part of a social group thing. There's an event in a bar that some people were thinking of going to. The only people who actually booked a ticket are a couple. I could be wrong, but I think everyone else is partly waiting to see who goes! They may also be waiting to see how they feel.

I spoke to the owner of the bar and he said that in previous years, they are closed for a few days over Christmas, and then on the 28th and 29th, people start to book tickets. I think it will be fine to leave it that late.

But there's only two people who live near me with whom I could've shared a cab and they are both away over New Year

I don't think there's any way to do the whole night for less than £80-£100.

when my parents were in their 70s, they got to bed later than me one New Year's 😂 they were in a restaurant, but then they went to someone's house.

I haven’t read this whole thread but the title caught my eye. I suffer from debilitating SAD and have pretty much my whole adult life. I generally try to hide it from friends and family. For the first time, this year I made plans to take a weeks unpaid leave so I could have a whole week of being able to exercise in daylight, get everything ready for Christmas without having a breakdown and generally have a week of self care before the school holidays start. I’ve been so looking forward to it! My child was sick on Monday and has been home with me instead. I can’t really talk to anyone in real life about this as the fact I took the week off feels so self indulgent and I feel it’s such strong irony that the first year I’ve tried to put myself first instead of just struggle through it, I’ve ended up cleaning up sick instead.

@EmeraldRoulette most people know that I hate winter so they get it. Others just think I'm a bit odd (and they don't believe me when I tell them how early I go to bed in the dark days).

I just crave light and sun.

@EmeraldRoulette my days of celebrating NYE are well over... Or drinking ones. I can't tolerate alcohol at all and have zero energy or patience with spending the evening with people partying. Midnight is soooooo late. Last few NYEs I've stayed home alone whilst my whole family go to a friend's to party and have a sleepover. TV to myself is bliss but I do get FOMO and sad they don't choice miserable little me!

@Sacmagique75 what terrible timing! Pretty typical of this time of year. Is your child recovering OK? Maybe someone can stay with them tomorrow and you attempt to get some of your jobs done then. I'm afraid I'd love to go Christmas shopping and stuff in my head but the hassle and energy required means I do all my shopping online.

Well done for trying to prioritise you. It's a positive step. You just have to try again some how... 🤔

I'm a late night person so I had to push myself to amend my body clock for more civilised hours, but I'm always awake at midnight, that's no problem.

In winter, I am aware that I could be missing out on morning light but I can't change my body clock more than I already have.

I realise people won't want to give away too much information about themselves on a public forum and I totally agree with that

I'm curious to know what kind of life you have if you're able to go to bed really early in winter, and what sort of time you get up

Do you just accept that you'll get a lot less done in winter? And does that affect your work?

I've had a range of unusual working hours and I was probably best when starting at around midday and then finishing early evening (8 or 9) and that usually gives you enough time to go and meet friends because even if they met at six after work, they'll still be out.

So I'm still in that habit now that I mostly work for myself. I don't make a lot of sense in the morning! 😂 better in summer of course.

I'm feeling quite flat today as had the flu jab yesterday. Also just got over flu from 3 weeks ago, can't remember a weekend when I felt normal for a while. But I am rolling with it.

@PurpleSkies2026 I feel for you 💐

It's sunny today, but the urge to do nothing is strong!

@EmeraldRoulette I'd say I'm. A bit better at going to bed right now than I can be but I can't get to sleep early. Lights off after reading for half an hour is about 11.45...maybe a little earlier sometimes. What I struggle with is the kids staying up later, me being tired, but then needing some quiet kid free time regardless of the time. I do make myself get some morning light and I try to eat within an hour of waking up. I fail every day often staring at my bowl of yogurt for an hour but the intention is there. I'm rubbish at managing to create new long lasting routines.

The sun is out here and I feel so much more human for it.

@PurpleSkies2026 i don't know what normal is anymore. I think though I've come to terms finally than the old me is gone and that's OK. And the new me is allowed to go slow and be different to other people. It's taken a year of therapy though...

Good luck with your weekends everyone and the crazy time of year that is upon us x

@mrsdiddlydoo i'm entirely sympathetic

I'm terrible at routine

I really need to establish a routine. I actually enjoyed having variation in work times. Routine is just not my thing. I was fine with it at school. I don't know what it is about me that doesn't suit routine now.

The few jobs I've had where a routine was imposed I found it very frustrating

It sounds silly, but I've been watching The Big Bang Theory Big and I really noticed how they stick to their schedules, their meal times, etc. Parents are/were the same. It's something I really need to work on.

I have been extremely lazy today, but the hour or so of tidying that I managed was really poor

I do find living in a small flat extremely difficult and I have sacrificed more than enough stuff. Like I really regret getting rid of some of it.

But I'm very aware that it would be better if I had a routine. It should probably be my New Year's resolution but I feel as if I've tried several times and found it extremely boring. So I end up never sticking with it. I'm not naturally domesticated generally. My mum is and my dad was. He found it very therapeutic to come home from work and cook and tidy up.

Honestly, they taught me the best habits and somehow I've lost all of them in the last couple years! Interestingly, that cpincided with me having a lower workload

But it also came inside with me having a nervous breakdown a couple of years ago, so I should not be too hard on myself!

Also complicated by the fact that I pretty much lost my social life in 2020. It's much easier to keep an ordered home when people are likely to appear at short notice and might even want to sleep on the sofa. I like for friends to feel comfortable in my home. I have moved since then, and my old flat was bigger and had sensible storage - this one has been designed for maximum inconvenience! It's hard to explain on unless you actually see it.

Sorry that's me being boring and having a moan

Perhaps you could lead us in morning yoghurt meditation - we could stare at a bowl of yoghurt and see if we could organise our brains! The reward being you get to eat a nice yoghurt afterwards 😁

We usually go to the village hall New Year’s Eve party (people who’ve been around for all of the threads may remember DH being assaulted a few years ago while trying to eject a drugged up idiot) but ticket sales are very low this year and it may be cancelled. I’m also conscious of going out and seeming to be enjoying myself while I’m off sick but I’ve had many NYEs in front of the TV crying silent tears due to how shit the year has been and how unlikely the next year is to be better.

DH finishes work on Wednesday til the new year and I’m really going to struggle with him being home all the time. I don’t know if he’s just irritating or I’m just irritated 😂😂.

@Idstillratherbepaddleboarding blimey
Was the druggie someone you know?

I think a lot of people don't want to commit this early

I'm actually slightly regretting having no plans this weekend but then I don't think I had any options to go out, there's actually three invitations next week and I've accepted two because I thought three was a bit much.

I perk up at this time, so I'm ready to go out now! 💃🏽 😂 couldn't get anything constructive done most of the day but yeah here we are.

I have been known to do a thorough clean at 2 am in winter but I'm trying to move away from that because then you end up missing daylight!

@EmeraldRoulette nope he was a guest of the band believe it or not. And he totally got away with it after a bodged job form the Police 😡😡.

We’ve been to the village brass band concert. I’ve been dreading it all day of course but it was just what I needed in the end.

I think my vitamin D is waning as I've been getting a bit forgetful and focus- challenged. Also under it slightly with work, don't know why but I feel a bit sad about that.

I'm going to cheer myself up with nice food, bath and music.

Good it's nearly 21 December.

@PurpleSkies2026 I don't notice a difference with vitamin D but I take it anyway, my doctor was absolutely adamant that I should

I'm not sure how I'm feeling, but lots of being vacant and vague

I think I had a good time out on Monday night. I'm actually not even sure. That's how vacant I am.

I'm out again tomorrow night, but I'm a bit worried about that because tomorrow is going to be quite a stressful day, well maybe it won't be, but it's certainly going to be a long one

After that, I am not doing anything sociable. I don't think until Christmas Eve. I've got an option for Sunday evening, but I'm not sure what I'll be doing because I'll have to help mum with stuff. It's just my local social group in the pub so they don't expect you to say whether or not you're going.

last night I started my home workout, got 10 minutes into it, and thought "nope".

This winter is really dragging. I also feel brain-fogged and listless. I make myself do things but by mid afternoon, I'm done and just want bed.