Page 5 | What does parental suicide do to a child?

Halycon · 2025-05-21T08:09:41+00:00

I know the Google answers about the terrible consequences it can have for a child in the short and long term, but did any of your parents end their life? Or do you know someone who was in this position? What was the impact, really?

Lady1576 · 29/05/2025 06:54

An friend of mine had a mother who attempted suicide a few times during his childhood and at 15 he eventually was the one to find her when she succeeded. Unsurprisingly, his brother later died of an ‚accidental‘ overdose of pills as a young adult and my friend hung himself at the age of 26, so I hope that answers your question.

kingprawnspaghetti · 29/05/2025 07:03

Aquilegifolia · 28/05/2025 09:27

Those posters saying that it inevitably ruins the children's lives need to realise that that's not universally true and neither is it inevitable. My post earlier on this thread about my happy, mentally healthy, well-adjusted successful children who are now in their 30s and past the age at which their father killed himself shows it's possible to have a normal, happy, life even if your parent has committed suicide or died in any other way.

I completely agree and it can (strangely) be a spur on to a life that does not want that life or mindset. (From my own personal experience of the same event)

OutandAboutMum1821 · 29/05/2025 07:14

kingprawnspaghetti · 29/05/2025 07:03

I completely agree and it can (strangely) be a spur on to a life that does not want that life or mindset. (From my own personal experience of the same event)

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Yes, I definitely have a lot of drive and passion to provide my children with a more stable family. I deliberately chose a husband who is very stable, and it brings me joy daily to watch my own 2 young children having everything from him that I didn’t have. I am so happy they are going to have more when I just had absence.

I also have huge drive to ensure my own mental health is good. I was prone to anxiety, depression and insomnia as a child/teenager, but I have taught myself strategies to improve and get on top of those things, and would now describe myself as a good sleeper. I walk, get fresh air, avoid caffeine after 4pm, swim weekly, read if I do wake up instead of crying. I am hugely determined and committed to staying well for my own children, taking a different path.

VoltaireMittyDream · 29/05/2025 17:37

OutandAboutMum1821 · 29/05/2025 07:14

Yes, I definitely have a lot of drive and passion to provide my children with a more stable family. I deliberately chose a husband who is very stable, and it brings me joy daily to watch my own 2 young children having everything from him that I didn’t have. I am so happy they are going to have more when I just had absence.

I also have huge drive to ensure my own mental health is good. I was prone to anxiety, depression and insomnia as a child/teenager, but I have taught myself strategies to improve and get on top of those things, and would now describe myself as a good sleeper. I walk, get fresh air, avoid caffeine after 4pm, swim weekly, read if I do wake up instead of crying. I am hugely determined and committed to staying well for my own children, taking a different path.

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This is wonderful. What a positive and determined response to a very difficult experience.

I think it is very hard to know how to respond to this type of thread, when the original post doesn’t make it clear whether a person is planning to end her life and wants to know how her DC might be affected (in which case nobody wants to reply in a way that might offer her reassurance to go through with her plan), or whether someone who survived the suicide of a parent is trying to understand whether their experience is normal, or what.

OutandAboutMum1821 · 29/05/2025 17:44

VoltaireMittyDream · 29/05/2025 17:37

This is wonderful. What a positive and determined response to a very difficult experience.

I think it is very hard to know how to respond to this type of thread, when the original post doesn’t make it clear whether a person is planning to end her life and wants to know how her DC might be affected (in which case nobody wants to reply in a way that might offer her reassurance to go through with her plan), or whether someone who survived the suicide of a parent is trying to understand whether their experience is normal, or what.

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Agree 100%. And I would say to the OP if they were my parent- please stay.

Spinachpastapicker · 29/05/2025 23:11

@FiveLeavesLeft thank you for your honest and heartfelt post on Sunday.