Ocd

[Lena4039]

hi. I hope someone will take the time to answer me. I have a child who’s 9 months who I love more than anything. when I was pregnant I got ocd, and it also continued after the child was born. now I've had it for quite a long time, and everyone around me is tired and fed up with my ocd, especially my husband. I'm now afraid he can't stand it anymore and can't stand being with me anymore. I have therefore decided to start medicine. I've been going to therapy the whole time, but I can't get the ocd under control. I'm so afraid that the medicine won't work because then my husband can't take it anymore. I also don't want to breastfeed and go on medication at the same time, so then I have to stop breastfeeding. this is also sad for me. but the biggest fear is that medicine won't work on my ocd.

I take sertraline for anxiety and OCD. I need quite a high dose to combat the OCD but it does work x

What therapy are you trying? CBT with ERP is the gold standard. Fluoxetine can be very effective for OCD. You’ll need a higher dose than the starting one though to manage the compulsions. You can overcome this and live a normal life again.

@Scutterbug thank you very much for reply. Do you feel that you can live an almost normal life with medicine?

@JoMarchesagain thank you very much for reply. I have had talking terapi with an OCDteam where we used CBT and ERP, but when I get home and have to avoid washing my hands, for example, I can't do it. it feels so disappointing. I hope I can have a more normal life, because it is so hard living with this.

You need to try OP - the medicine definitely won't work if you don't try it. Having a parent with OCD can have quite a major affect on children, not to mention it makes life miserable for you. Don't expect the medication to cure you immediately though, you'll probably start on a low dose and gradually increase it, give it time and I'm sure it will help.

Thank you for answering me. What do you mean “medicine definitely won't work if you don't try it”?:) that it won’t work on its own, or that I have to try medicine?

yes, this is so hard to live with and I guess I’m weak because I can’t beat it:/ I don’t know what to do. I really hope it will work.

I'm so sorry you're feeling this way. Deciding to start medication is a brave step, and it's okay to feel scared about it. Many people with OCD find relief with the right treatment it often takes time to find what works best for you. It's also okay to grieve stopping breastfeeding; it doesn't diminish your love for your child. You're doing everything you can to be there for your family. Give yourself grace you deserve support and understanding. You're not alone in this.

Yes my ICD is under control. But I suffer other MH issues and that’s a whole other story!

@Emilyjhon thank you very much. yes, I'm a little disappointed to have to start medicine when I really had faith that therapy would make me dare to challenge my ocd. I try everything for my family to be well, and the last option is medicine. therefore, I am terrified that the medicine won’t work.

@Scutterbug That gives me a little bit of hope. I’m sorry to hear that, hope you feel okay soon.

@Lena4039 I wanted to let you know that the right medication at the right dose (for me fluoxetine) plus ERP honestly gave me my life back. I very occasionally still have compulsions but they do not affect my day to day life (and that of my family) as they did.

I know this is a bit off the walI but I wash my hands when I get home. And take my shoes off. Nothing wrong with that.

What else do you do that is so bad?

OCD is highly distressing and life-changing but the good news is that it is highly treatable. As a teenager I had it terribly and thought I would never get better. I did.

You have to take the medication; you have nothing to lose. Also, read, Overcoming OCD’ by Professor David Veale. He is the foremost OCD expert in the UK and his book changed my life. You can get better xx

My OCD was terrible, I had 14 sessions of CBT (to begin with it was k e of the hardest things I’ve done) and it’s literally changed and saved my life.

@JoMarchesagain thank you very much for reply. that gives me hope. I was hoping to make it without medicine, but I can't seem to make it happen. so i hope the medicine can help me.

How is this helpful? Do you know anything about OCD?

OP, my youngest son has OCD and started taking fluoxetine a few weeks ago. I think his dose will probably be increased to 30mg at his next appointment. He's only 12 and hasn't been able to attend school since June. I was upset at the thought of him being on medication, but to be honest I now just want it to help because nothing else has so far. I'm on a Facebook group for parents of children with OCD and many of them have said that either fluoxetine or sertraline gave them their child back. But obviously the therapy is important too in teaching techniques to keep the OCD under control in the long term.

All the very best It is a horrible illness. I had it myself as a teenager.

@DeliciousApples thanks for reply. there is a lot I do that is controlled by anxiety and ocd. a lot of different things, but it's all about the fact that I'm afraid that something will happen to my baby if I don't do those things. for example, exposure to bacteria, chemicals. I know that it is healthy for babies to be exposed to bacteria, but at the same time I am afraid that the baby will become seriously ill.

@NearlyXmasTime thank you very much for reply. wow, did you make it without medicine? Do you want to share what helped you out of it?

@FionaSkates thank you very much for reply. did you have to use medicine to get well, or did you manage it in some other way? right now it feels like it's going to be like this forever, and that I don't understand how it's going to get better again. Thank you very much for the tip about the book, I will check it out.

You wouldn't need to stop breastfeeding. I took sertraline from when my baby was 10 months and stopped breastfeeding him at 22 months. I was on sertraline for all of those months.

He's a laid back, healthy 16 year old now. He does really well at school, and there were no problems at all.

Try the medication, and give it time to work. I felt much better taking the medication. Before that I was extremely anxious, and having intrusive thoughts etc.

@Funnywonder Thank you very much for your reply and for your understanding. I really hope your son feels better soon, it's a horrible disease to be afflicted with. I wish him all the best. can i ask how you recovered?

Imagine you are climbing tree. The first branch is 8ft up in the air so you will probably get there somewhere by jumping/scrambling/swinging/heaving yourself up. That’s tackling OCD without medication.

Now imagine you have a step-ladder. You put it infront of the tree and gracefully climb up to the first branch. That’s tackling OCD with medication. You can do it both ways but why would you do it the first way. Xx

thank you very much for reply. wow, did you make it without medicine? Do you want to share what helped you out of it?

Once I realised it was my brain that was making me do things and that I had the ability to control my own brain the CBT started to work.

Weeks one homework was to leave the house on anyone day without cleaning my DS’s ensuite and I couldn’t do it which is like you and your handwashing. Then on week two I succeeded, I literally ran out of the house jumped in the car and made myself do it. It was one of the hardest things I’ve done.

I learned techniques such as realising my anxiety would get higher and higher and higher but would peak and then gradually subside. So for example if I didn’t get up and neaten my Venetian blinds I thought my anxiety would get so bad I’d eventually have a heart attack when it fact it got high, stayed high and then gradually went down. Over time the urge to straighten the blinds got less.

I also had to write down the worst thing I thought could happen if such and such happens and then realistically what was likely to happen. Over time I came to terms that what was realistically going to happen was way more likely than what my brain had previously envisioned.

Honestly I can say hand on heart that the CBT was the best thing I’ve ever done. My OCD was really bad.

I didn’t take medicine as the therapy worked for me.

I think if you’ve been offered medication you should try it.

To be honest @Lena4039 I can't remember much about my recovery. I had CBT at the local hospital and really hated it. I used to lie about getting better in the hope that I wouldn't have to go back😆 Unfortunately my mum isn't around anymore for me to ask her for details, but she was incredibly supportive and I know I must have driven her mad with my anxiety and my rituals, or as my son calls them, patterns. What I do remember is that one evening I was lying in bed and my mum came and started chatting in the doorway. I had been lying there fighting this irresistible urge to wash my hands and she said something along the lines of 'Sure it's not as if you're going for a picnic at this time of night' and I found it funny and laughed. But the words stuck in my head as something very sensible and real. I honestly think I used those words about the picnic, repeating in my head, over and over, to help me fight the OCD.